Was I wrong??? [Forum Archive]

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Was I wrong???

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Posted by: Pitboss

Okay so my GF tells me she was mad at me the other night.. I kind of sensed it when we went to bed. But I'm having a hard time understanding her justification for being upset.. here you tell me.

We were sitting together watching (no laughing) Harry Potter. We were all cuddled up together

. I placed my hand on her thigh and she moves it between her legs. I tried to uhm comfort her

but just couldn't really get into it. I told her if we were watching 9 1/2 Weeks it would have been different but we were watching Harry Potter... it just didn't seem right.

Yeah I could have stopped the movie and we could have played around for a bit I guess.

Do you think it's right that she was mad about this???

Posted by: I Are Baboon

Perhaps she needs a lesson in human behavior. Fact is, men can not always be turned on like a light.

She should feel a little disappointed, but not at all "mad."

Posted by: Leslie

YES! My BF used to get mad sometimes because I used to "reject" him

It was only usually because I was in the middle of something-like cooking ect. What happens is she will feel that you are not attarcted to her, or the movie is more important, or worst yet she will be afraid to make a "move" in the futre becasue she will fear she will be rejected again! You have a woman initiating sex, do you know how many guys would kill for that

Posted by: craig777

Pitboss,

Leslie is correct women have a million things going on in there about what happened, and they also run on emotions. So when you thought you just couldn't because of the movie, she is thinking I am not attractive anymore, he doesn't love me anymore, he wants someone new, he would rather watch the movie etc. My wife would get mad at me for things I just didn't understand at all. I try now to ask my wife what did you hear me say, or what did you think just happened. They want you to assure them all the time how much you love them, need them, appreciate them. She also needs to try to understand that men say exactly what they mean, whereas women never say exactly what they mean. So they are always trying to read between the lines for us, and I keep reminding my wife there is no between the lines.

Posted by: Leslie

Bravo Craig- I like you more and more each day

Posted by: craig777

Thank you Leslie

Pitboss,

Let me give you an example of what happened to me. My wife and I were dating at the time and her kids called me Fergie Fergalow. I don't know why they just did, and she asked me if I minded if they called me that. I said very innocently that I would rather they didn't because it didn't show me much respect. That was all I said. She stormed out of the house and didn't speak to me for four days.

Now what she heard.

She heard that she was a horrible mother and had raised brats.

How she got that I will never know, but she did. Even the best relationship takes a lot of work, but they are worth it.

Posted by: I Are Baboon

Originally posted by craig777
Pitboss,

Leslie is correct women have a million things going on in there about what happened, and they also run on emotions. So when you thought you just couldn't because of the movie, she is thinking I am not attractive anymore, he doesn't love me anymore, he wants someone new, he would rather watch the movie etc. My wife would get mad at me for things I just didn't understand at all. I try now to ask my wife what did you hear me say, or what did you think just happened. They want you to assure them all the time how much you love them, need them, appreciate them. She also needs to try to understand that men say exactly what they mean, whereas women never say exactly what they mean. So they are always trying to read between the lines for us, and I keep reminding my wife there is no between the lines.

Come on!! Tell her to get over it.

It's not always about the woman!

Posted by: Leslie

Originally posted by I Are Baboon

Come on!! Tell her to get over it.

It's not always about the woman!

OH man, WHERE is Mountainbiker Chick

Posted by: Leslie

Well PB- you ask for advice/feedback and no response from YOU

LOL

Posted by: Ginni

Originally posted by I Are Baboon

Come on!! Tell her to get over it.

It's not always about the woman!

Tsk tsk tsk

Shame on you baboon....

Posted by: I Are Baboon

What is the problem with you people!? Just because Pitboss was not in the mood, his girlfriend has the right to be MAD at him?? Do you realize how asinine that sounds? It had nothing to do with HER, he just was not in the mood. Why does that give her the right to be mad? Are you suggesting a man should "perform" even if he really does not feel like it? If the tables were turned and it was HER that was not in the mood, this would not even be an issue, would it?

Posted by: EarWax

I think... err... nevermind PB, I am going to go back work, it's safer.

Posted by: craig777

IAB,

I don't believe the question is whether or not Pitboss should have performed his duty. The question is why his GF is mad. I don't believe she has the right to get mad at anything she feels he has done wrong, but they are both looking at this from very very different perspectives. You are definately seeing Pitboss's side, and you are a guy. Don't you want to know why she is upset, or hurt. Helps in stopping future fights. If she feels that he doesn't find her attractive anymore, and he is thinking I can't with the movie on. Telling her to get over it, is not going to help the matter at all.

Just my opinion

Posted by: Pitboss

I'm not sure hwo to respond really.

Hmmm I was actually in the mood but at the same time I was kind of in the movie. I know we are different when it comes to movies.. like them loud and large and uninterrupted!! She on the other hand can spend a week watching the same movie, pausing it here and there, etc.

I don't know. She does initiate it more than i do now compared to months back. But she does it when she's in the mood and I'm either busy or extremely tired. So in one way I agree with Leslie, and I agree with Craig but I also IAB.

Maybe next time I'll compromise and stop the movie and have a little make outy session. tart the movie and then stop again and continue where we left off, take it upstairs and then cum back down and finish the movie... I guess.

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by craig777
If she feels that he doesn't find her attractive anymore,

Okay why is it women have such a complex about this subject?? If we aren't attracted to you why the hell ae we with you??? Every single woman I have ever been with falls prey to this. Just because one month I was f'n like a rabbit and the next month I'm taking bets my Great grand daddy is getting more than me doesn't mean we aren't attracted anymore. Christ we all have phases. Sometimes maybe it's that we are over worked or maybe we have taken some time of and ae in a bit of a lazy mood.

For me it's usually lack of sleep and after only getting 5 hours sleep in a 48 hour time period it does make it a little hard to perform.

Women........ blah!

Posted by: craig777

Originally posted by Pitboss

Okay why is it women have such a complex about this subject?? If we aren't attracted to you why the hell ae we with you??? Every single woman I have ever been with falls prey to this. Just because one month I was f'n like a rabbit and the next month I'm taking bets my Great grand daddy is getting more than me doesn't mean we aren't attracted anymore. Christ we all have phases. Sometimes maybe it's that we are over worked or maybe we have taken some time of and ae in a bit of a lazy mood.

For me it's usually lack of sleep and after only getting 5 hours sleep in a 48 hour time period it does make it a little hard to perform.

Women........ blah!

Pitboss, when you figure this one out, write a book it will make millions. I will be first in line. Love you ladies, but you are a mistery.

Posted by: Leslie

I hear you PB~ I was just stating all possibilities.

My BF complains of not enough sex during the week

But it is due to the fact I get NO sleep, have to work, workout like crazy for the show, and COOK for everyone- Women get tired too

I guess when one wants it and the other doesn't, friction is created, not that kind of friction though

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by craig777

Pitboss, when you figure this one out, write a book it will make millions. I will be first in line. Love you ladies, but you are a mistery.

"Men are from Mars and Women are just plain crazy!!"

Posted by: EarWax

Or Pitboss, you can tell her how you like to watch movies

Communication is usually better than everyone flying off the handle.

(oops sorry, dandruff) Or you can compromise like you suggest.

Or maybe.. you could get a vibrator and just.. errmm put in on her lap when you are really into the movie (ok, maybe not the last one) heh

Posted by: craig777

My wife loves to rent movies, and then we lay down on the floor with pillows to watch. Then she wants to talk. She can talk and watch at the same time.

Posted by: craig777

Almost forgot

Hi Ginni

Posted by: EarWax

Yeah Hi Ginni!

LTNS!

Posted by: Leslie

Originally posted by craig777
My wife loves to rent movies, and then we lay down on the floor with pillows to watch. Then she wants to talk. She can talk and watch at the same time.

LOL I always want to talk when me and my BF lay down for a nap LOL

Women!

Posted by: craig777

Originally posted by Leslie2196

LOL I always want to talk when me and my BF lay down for a nap LOL

Women!

You are worth it.

Posted by: ZECH

Originally posted by I Are Baboon
What is the problem with you people!? Just because Pitboss was not in the mood, his girlfriend has the right to be MAD at him?? Do you realize how asinine that sounds? It had nothing to do with HER, he just was not in the mood. Why does that give her the right to be mad? Are you suggesting a man should "perform" even if he really does not feel like it? If the tables were turned and it was HER that was not in the mood, this would not even be an issue, would it?

If the truth was known it could be considered payback. Knowing PB, I bet she has turned him down more then he has turned her down, so what's the problem? Even nympho's are not in the mood all the time!

Posted by: MtnBikerChk

Originally posted by Leslie2196

OH man, WHERE is Mountainbiker Chick

yeah, he's a big talker.

in our house it IS always about the women (me and the cats).

Posted by: irontime

I may have the solution for you PB. Next time this happens allow her to preform oral sex on you while you continue to watch the movie, that way both of you get a little of what you want.

Posted by: Leslie

Originally posted by irontime
I may have the solution for you PB. Next time this happens allow her to preform oral sex on you while you continue to watch the movie, that way both of you get a little of what you want.

LOL

Posted by: irontime

Wha????
I realize that he will be giving in, but hey, you've got to compromise

Posted by: EarWax

LOL, yeah, poor PB

Posted by: Erilaya

Craig.. how do you feel about taking a second wife?? LOL.. You are amazing! I love reading your thoughts!! WOW>. you wife is one blessed woman.
thanks for sharing..

PB..I canna give input.. as I am useless in this subject.. Hugs to ya tho.

Eri'

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by Erilaya
PB..I canna give input.. as I am useless in this subject.. Hugs to ya tho.

Eri'

Hmmm PB wondering whatwould happen if it was Erilaya he was cuddling with.......... can ya say Pause button!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Erilaya

PB!! YOU MADE MY NIGHT BABY!! give me five I will do my best to inspire .. Harry Potter or Not... you show me yours I'll show ya Mine.. smiles...

Eri'

Posted by: craig777

Originally posted by Erilaya
Craig.. how do you feel about taking a second wife?? LOL.. You are amazing! I love reading your thoughts!! WOW>. you wife is one blessed woman.
thanks for sharing..

PB..I canna give input.. as I am useless in this subject.. Hugs to ya tho.

Eri'

Awwww thank you sweetie, and as much as I would love to accept your offer, I think if I did I would have a lot of trouble on my hands. My wife would be blessing me, and blessing me.

Posted by: Erilaya

ack that is okay Craig I will make do with the man I have.. He does have some good attributes.. although lately I cannot find them easily.. nt giggles...

Posted by: naturaltan

* snicker *

Posted by: Erilaya

Hey NT....oh yeah see my "vent" in the FUQ thread.. Hubs saw that lil tidbit above this morning when he needed the puter for a minute to do some online banking..ooops LOL sheeee--ahht!

LOL

Eri'

Posted by: ali

i agree with a lot of the good advice here. point being, your girl isn't "mad" at you, behind all anger is hurt anyway. the way i feel when i can't get my boyfriend "off",(ewww) the way i want i feel like it's something personal, or he's not feelin' attracted to me or some kind of girl reason! as a women we always expect the guy to always be ready to go! you just need to communicate more and be able to know it's ok to talk about stuff like this and, maybe tell her it' doesn't mean you love her any less if you can't get in the mood! not to get all men are from mars on ya but we are different!

ali

Posted by: Pitboss

Well we talked about that incident and others in the past month or so. But she kept bringing up the fact that she was in the mood while we were watching the movie and obviously I wasn't. My reponse??

Well if "Harry Potter" does it for you I'll buy the DVD and we can watch that anytime you want!!!!!!!!!

End result... we had some great sex. Then I promised that later after she showers to go to work tonight I'd love to go down on her for a bit.

Now here is another example of the things I have to put up with. She showers and then wakes me up from a nap and says "Okay"
Then I half asleep say "Okay what?"
and she says "what you said you'd do"
Me, "said what when? You mean right now when I woke up? Or did I say something in my sleep? Or was it something I said this morning?"
She, "Nevermind"
Me, "Huh?"
silence...................
Me, "Oh you showered!"
her, "Forget it now"
Me, "Oh hell no!!"
Silence and then a lot of moaning

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by Erilaya
PB!! YOU MADE MY NIGHT BABY!! give me five I will do my best to inspire .. Harry Potter or Not... you show me yours I'll show ya Mine.. smiles...

Eri'

Sorry I couldn't stick around.. LIke I said I was wondering and I took that wonder into the bedroom with me before I had to go to work

uhm thanks!!!!!!

Posted by: Erilaya

That is alright PB ,"story of my life.". LOL.. glad it all worked out for you though.. sounds like it was a productive talk..

be well.

smiles

Eri'

Posted by: ali

hello! how long have you been w/ this person? you 2 need to talk about these things, really! when i first met my guy and let's say he woke me up, i would be like woohoo, but as time passes you begin to be more confident and realize the realtionship isn't just about sex. don't get me wrong it is a great part of it, but there is no need to always be in the mood for the simple reason of kepin' the person interested. and plus sleep rules! no, but really, if you wake me i'm like a creature from anouther world. i don't think your wrong if you will and do intend to discuss these issues if you feel the realtionship is worth it. and your girl needs to be a little more confident in her man! hey, was harry potter good?

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by ali
hello! how long have you been w/ this person? you 2 need to talk about these things, really! when i first met my guy and let's say he woke me up, i would be like woohoo, but as time passes you begin to be more confident and realize the realtionship isn't just about sex. don't get me wrong it is a great part of it, but there is no need to always be in the mood for the simple reason of kepin' the person interested. and plus sleep rules! no, but really, if you wake me i'm like a creature from anouther world. i don't think your wrong if you will and do intend to discuss these issues if you feel the realtionship is worth it. and your girl needs to be a little more confident in her man! hey, was harry potter good?

We have talked more than once. We have only been dating for 6 months and she has been living with me for a month, almost a month. We just don't see each other as much as we used to.

She has her issues as we all do. I remember her gettinmg upset one time because I didn't hold her at night... uhm while I was sleeping I didn't hold her. Christ I was asleep!! LOL

For more reading I think you'll find a little more info in my diary in the journal forum.. Diary of a Madman.

Oh and actually Harry Potter was pretty good for what it's worth.

Posted by: ali

hey buddy, sounds like you really care about her, so , work it out! good people are hard to find, when you love someone you should fight for them, and realize that when you give up on a person for there issues and annoyances, sure enough there will be someone you will meet with other issues....ya know! it's funny b/c people think just b/c they live 2gether they will have more time, and it's so the opposite. you sound like a nice guy who is going through something, as we all do. the first 6 months of any realtionship are tough and scary, but, get past this and you 2 can manage anything!

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by ali
hey buddy, sounds like you really care about her, so , work it out! good people are hard to find, when you love someone you should fight for them, and realize that when you give up on a person for there issues and annoyances, sure enough there will be someone you will meet with other issues....ya know! it's funny b/c people think just b/c they live 2gether they will have more time, and it's so the opposite. you sound like a nice guy who is going through something, as we all do. the first 6 months of any realtionship are tough and scary, but, get past this and you 2 can manage anything!

Oh there have been times that I wanted to bang my head agaisnt the wall and scream "why?" Sometimes I just want to give up on the whole relationship thing but I keep going. Sometiems I swear I'm putting more effort into this than I did my marriage... hmm wonder what my therapist would say about that?? Yes I have a therapist. I see her only every 3 weeks instead of weekly now and I'm so totally in lust with her.. okay her ankles, feet and cleavage!! LOL

Posted by: Erilaya

PB.. come on over. I will be your therapist.. you said you liked my cleavage too .. you teaser!

( hey I know what your saying 'bout the relationship thang.. I have been married twice and engaged more times than I care to admit LOL..this one seems to be wroking so far. well it is the longest at least Hee Hee )

Eri'

Posted by: ali

weel, i've never been married or engaged. the man i'm with now is awesome and we probally will be gettin' hitched soon. but i was never the type to deal with crap or have a boyfriend just b/c everyone else did. no, i dated the guy who i wanted to change, or the bad boy. i had severe father issues, and i also was in thearpy. i felt it did me good. although i probally will always have some discomfort towards the situation. maybe you are putting more into this girl than you did to your x wife. and guess what? that's awesome, b/c you are learning from mistakes and keeping a good thing. your girl does sound a lil insacure. i was like that w/ my boyfriend till one day he freaked out and was like, "i dont always want to hug and kiss and cuddle, and it has nothing to do w/ my feelings for you! not everything has to do w/ feelings!" god i feel like dr. phill.!! please tell me more. i used to have a lot of cleve, but, i went off the pill! now i have pearky b cups! that's cool.....right? do you really lust your theripist?

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by Erilaya
PB.. come on over. I will be your therapist.. you said you liked my cleavage too .. you teaser!
Eri'

Woman that's not cleavage. That for some men is a dream cum true. I could so get lost in there!!!!!!!

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by ali
weel, i've never been married or engaged. the man i'm with now is awesome and we probally will be gettin' hitched soon. but i was never the type to deal with crap or have a boyfriend just b/c everyone else did. no, i dated the guy who i wanted to change, or the bad boy. i had severe father issues, and i also was in thearpy. i felt it did me good. although i probally will always have some discomfort towards the situation. maybe you are putting more into this girl than you did to your x wife. and guess what? that's awesome, b/c you are learning from mistakes and keeping a good thing. your girl does sound a lil insacure. i was like that w/ my boyfriend till one day he freaked out and was like, "i dont always want to hug and kiss and cuddle, and it has nothing to do w/ my feelings for you! not everything has to do w/ feelings!" god i feel like dr. phill.!! please tell me more. i used to have a lot of cleve, but, i went off the pill! now i have pearky b cups! that's cool.....right? do you really lust your theripist?

Ali I hope you stick around this place I'm beginning to really like you

This relationship is way different than any I have had before. Mostly the fact that we do tend to have communication problems on a daily basis and I'm still learning how to handle that.
She is insecure and I tend to be controlling and extremely impulsive. Keeping myself from say "goodbye" is a very hard thing for me.. LOL

Yes I do have a little crush on Dr. Amy. She should have never shown me her ankles.. LOL

Perky B cup huh? I don't believe you prove it

Posted by: ali

i wish i could show you....maybe soon i'll learn how to put a picture on here and booombs away! i feel like my mom on the computer...it's so new to me! life is about learning and screwing up and screwing around...no no only kiddin'...you be good! when i met my guy i couldn't stand him. i met him at the gym...SHOCKER! but he is def. not the typically gym guy, he's more of a tri athlete. i was on the bike once and i had a shirt draped over the top of the bike, he walked over and smelled the arm pit. dud, i flipped out! he's like a joker, grooose bathroom humor joker! point being i didn't give a flying fkuc what i did or said around him b/c i didn't care if he left. today that is the one thing he loves about me....ya know that i always say what's on my mind. not that it comes easy for me but, no i fool my self into thinking it's easy b/c it was in the beginning and it keeps us open honest and in love! ew cheesy! my therapist was a little Jewish women, def. not like ms. Amy!

Posted by: CRASHMAN

so PB can you get mad at her now when she's not in the mood?

Posted by: ali

good point! what do you do when's she's all "i have a head ache!"

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by ali
good point! what do you do when's she's all "i have a head ache!"

Uhm take care business

Posted by: ali

what like, by yourself

Posted by: Pitboss

Originally posted by ali
what like, by yourself

Well I sure wasn't gonna ask my neighbor for help.. he's not my type!!!

Posted by: BUSTINOUT

Originally posted by Leslie2196
YES! My BF used to get mad sometimes because I used to "reject" him

Well finally, the tables are turned. Sucks don't it? PB, she is pissed cause now the shoe is on the other foot. Sometimes you just gotta let them be pissed and go on about your business. BTW, how was the movie? lol Always remember one thing, no matter what you do or say, you are wrong. lol

Posted by: ali

not true! noone is ever always wrong! that is for people who like to play the poor me roll! deal w/ the real issues at hand and stop that "were always wrong" sounds like an episode of "the man show"

Posted by: BUSTINOUT

Hey big 14 thread poster. Learn to know a joke when you here one, before spouting. PB and I go way back and knows what I mean.

Posted by: ali

hey now! no need to get all serious and take a dig @ my 14 posts! i was playing also. nothing said is ment to offend anyone, if i did...sorry...

Posted by: Burner02

hiya ali!
long island, eh? You know my friend Shawn? He lives there too....

Posted by: ali

is that sopossed to be a joke? where does he live? i actually have friends who just moved to colorado!

Posted by: BUSTINOUT

Originally posted by ali
hey now! no need to get all serious and take a dig @ my 14 posts! i was playing also. nothing said is ment to offend anyone, if i did...sorry...

LOL...Psych. Welcome aboard ali. Just messin with your 14 threads. Gotta start somewhere. BTW, your job here is to give PB as much crap as possible. lol

Posted by: Burner02

Originally posted by ali
is that sopossed to be a joke? where does he live? i actually have friends who just moved to colorado!

ummm, yeah? Guess I need to work on my delivery....

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Was I wrong???

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