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Ok ladies...tell me whats going on inside this girls head


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Posted by: higgy87

The girl would be my ex-girlfriend. We met at the end of Sophmore year in highschool and dated until the start of my Junior year in college. Pretty damn long time. We split up this past fall, October I think. Ever since then we've been hangin out just like we were best friends...with no messin around of course anyway, whenever I see her I get a big ass hug, as well as when I leave. Sometimes I'll kiss her on cheek/forehead and she'll tell me "thank you." She really enjoys my company, as do I enjoy her's. She was super upset when I moved away to go to school this spring so I only get to see her about once a month. And when I do, we spend every minute together.

So whats up with her?

Does she still have something for me or should I keep on truckin, b/c I defenitely still like her.


Thanks,
Justin


Posted by: katie64

Ask her.........


Posted by: higgy87

Damn....thats gonna be hard.

She shows all the signs of wanting to be together....just she says she doesn't want a bf at the time......f'ing weird if you ask me. I live 6 hours away from her, but i'd be willing to drive home and see her atleast every other week. well, thats a thought

[Higgy preps for balls of steel]






Posted by: Jodi

She doesn't want a boyfriend (I can relate to that right now ) but she's young by the sounds of it. The reason I say this is because she wants you close to her side as a friend and doesn't want to change that BUT she doesn't want anyone else to have you either.

Have you had another girlfriend since October?


Posted by: higgy87

Quote:
Originally posted by Jodi
She doesn't want a boyfriend (I can relate to that right now ) but she's young by the sounds of it. The reason I say this is because she wants you close to her side as a friend and doesn't want to change that BUT she doesn't want anyone else to have you either.

Have you had another girlfriend since October?

We've both seen other people since we split up. She told me like back in Jan./Feb. that after going out on a few dates that the guys were pricks and didn't compare, beats the hell outta me. Not sure if she's too young, she turns 21 in about 2 months. Maybe young in life experience.

hig


Posted by: Jodi

Yeah thats young.

Then she probably does still like you but if she doesn't want a boyfriend then why has she been dating other people. You don't casually date people unless your seeking a companionship or just out to get laid Well at least I don't

Tell me, seeing you posted this question in the first place. You 2 having sex?


Posted by: butterfly

Personally, I hate long distance relationships... long distance phone calls, all the travelling, never there when you really want them there... all good reasons to NOT pursue a more committed relationship at this time.


Posted by: higgy87

Quote:
Originally posted by Jodi
Yeah thats young.

You don't casually date people unless your seeking a companionship or just out to get laid Well at least I don't

Tell me, seeing you posted this question in the first place. You 2 having sex?
She went out on a couple double dates w/ her friends friends, nothing major.

No we're not having sex...but I could really use some right now

-hig


Posted by: gr81

It looks like you need a mans advice since only woman have responded. get some closure man and move on. Don't let her keep you in the bullpen while she is probably out doing other guys when you are not together and not telling you. There is nothing that you can do now that you have broken up. Women do this all the time, keep the guy arounds but keep them at bay so they can have the attention and they don't have to give up the poon. You are young and you guys have been together for a long time and now you are not so chances are that she is out experiencing other people like she should. Forget her and find another girl to be with or at least to fuck. If nothing else happens, you ex may realize that your doing fine without her and then ahe may what you even more. No matter what she says though, don't believe it. If she says that she has only been out a few times, she is probably trying to spare your feelings. I'm telling you, move on


Posted by: S.O.S

i basically agree with gr81. ive had the same problem with girls. but your in college man just go out and have some fun and meet other girls and dont worry about her. after dating someone for as long as you say you were with her alot of people find that they dont know what to do with themselves without that person.


Posted by: Lean_Physique16

I am only 16, but I am a literal genius so hear me out: Move on, at least for now. The fact is that I am sure by the sound of it that you both love eachother, but in life, everybody must love other people and date other people and experiment. If you are really meant to be together, the nresume the relationship later on down the road. Good luck, and I hope everything works out for you.


Posted by: trinsdad

Quote:
Originally posted by Jodi
She doesn't want a boyfriend (I can relate to that right now ) but she's young by the sounds of it. The reason I say this is because she wants you close to her side as a friend and doesn't want to change that BUT she doesn't want anyone else to have you either.

Have you had another girlfriend since October?

Jodi, you are an ambassador of Wisdom!

Jodi, I believe is exactly right. Best thing a man can do if it is frustrating you is make your move, one way or the other then stick to your guns.


Don't spend too much time trying to figure that kind of programming out man...its too complicated and you will go to your grave trying.



Posted by: olusco

Why can't you bang her as a friend before going to long distance. She just want to keep you around for friendship and It seems you want her but do not know how to table it. Well move on and stop the bullshit.


Posted by: Jim1954

Katie is right on the money here! This is a problem with a lot of relationships is not having "HONEST COMMUNICATION".
Just make sure she knows you aren't going to get pissed at what she says. If there is fear of repercussions, she will be afraid to be communicate again.

Jim


Posted by: Leethal

Here is the deal she knows she is to young to be in a committed realtionship but still wants you. I guarantee it, you need to be laying pipe with her and with other girls at school- if you are a junior you have blown away too much time-get busy NOW! Date around if she wants to come visit let her. When she comees take her out on a date like she was the only person you are seeing and get her into bed too. Don't be such a freaking worry wart. She is coming to visit cause she wants you- you just got to make the right mood.


Posted by: BUSTINOUT

Quote:
Originally posted by trinsdad

Don't spend too much time trying to figure that kind of programming out man...its too complicated and you will go to your grave trying.
Truer words were never spoken. Half the battle is tryng to figure your own head out. Trying to figure two out is dang near impossible. Besides, your's is the only one you have any control over. Good luck.


Posted by: YoungLady

My question is this: If she's not interested in having a relationship with you, why is she so upset about your moving away? Sounds like she still has it bad for you! As a woman, I can tell you that if I'm not interested in a man I wouldn't spend a significant amount of time with him or be upset if he moves away!Talk to her ASAP & ask her about her feelings for you! In response you should tell her how you're feeling too.


Posted by: higgy87

Damn, thanks for all the replies!

As before she's still being kinda bull-headed. I've told her how I feel, and that doesn't yield any results. When I ask her for her feelings about us she gives me lame ass answers, like she's trying to avoid the subject or question. But as always, she's still showing interest and whenever I get to go home from school we always hang out. Beats the hell outta me. I don't want to keep buggin her about us, b/c knowing my luck that will totally ruin everything. So I'm just going to do my own thing for 5 more months till I'm done w/ school, then move back and put on the full court press. I'm not letting her ruin my life, so I'm just going to do my own thing, have fun, be true to myself and maybe someday she'll see what she's missing out on.

Thanks everyone,
Justin


Posted by: gr81

good for you man, just do your own thing.


Posted by: OceanDude

It's pretty clear to me she does not have many desirable alternative right now and wants to cover her bases in the interim. Chances are she is comfortable with you and can relate some positive feelings or security with when she was with you. My advice would be to not get to hung up on it and jsut remember the relationship and how you left it on positive terms. In a few years yours and her whole world is going to change when you go off to college. Highschool becomes pretty irrelevant after about the first 2 homecomings during college breaks for the holidays. All your friends will be comparing notes and talking about their futures and highschool becomes almost an embarassment about year 3 in college. What you will likly find is that you will meet up with her again 5 - 7 years out of highschool and you will be into a career and have different priorities and outlooks. If you are then both still at the same intellectual and emotional level its always fun to hook up and see if there was anything too it.


Posted by: higgy87

Quote:
Originally posted by OceanDude
It's pretty clear to me she does not have many desirable alternative right now and wants to cover her bases in the interim. Chances are she is comfortable with you and can relate some positive feelings or security with when she was with you. My advice would be to not get to hung up on it and jsut remember the relationship and how you left it on positive terms. In a few years yours and her whole world is going to change when you go off to college. Highschool becomes pretty irrelevant after about the first 2 homecomings during college breaks for the holidays. All your friends will be comparing notes and talking about their futures and highschool becomes almost an embarassment about year 3 in college. What you will likly find is that you will meet up with her again 5 - 7 years out of highschool and you will be into a career and have different priorities and outlooks. If you are then both still at the same intellectual and emotional level its always fun to hook up and see if there was anything too it.


Hmmm, Junior year of college is starting in about a month You do make a good point though. I know people change over time. She still has 2 more years of school left, I'll be done this winter, and then I get to start my career. We'll see how my career and her two more years of school change us both. And hopefully for the better. But if things don't work out, I just hope that I'm able to find someone of that caliber, and not leave my self saying, "DOH!"



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