Men and Women: Just Friends?? [Forum Archive]

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Men and Women: Just Friends??

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Posted by: AnnaDTX

I had a conversation with my ex last night and I was telling him that I am making new friends blah, blah . . and most of them are guys, i have known these people for quite some time and none of them ever tried anything with me and vice versa. But he insists that my friendships will not last. WHY? I refuse to believe it. I like hanging with the boys they take care of me.

is there such a thing as JUST FRIENDS??

Posted by: 007

I don't think so... remember "when harry met sally"

Posted by: largepkg

I think most men regardless of their intentions subconsciously desire their female friends. On top of this you're a gorgeous girl which makes it even more likely. Don't be naive.

Posted by: AnnaDTX

I am so naive and I have never seen when harry met sally.

If I had a HOT guy friend . . sure I might have some impure thoughts but would I really want to ruin a good friendship over some hot, steamy sex??? no way

Posted by: largepkg

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnaDTX

If I had a HOT guy friend . . sure I might have some impure thoughts but would I really want to ruin a good friendship over some hot, steamy sex??? no way

This is the exact opposite of how most guys react!

Posted by: AnnaDTX

how about this: I am not attracted to any of my guy friends so I am safe!?

Posted by: largepkg

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnaDTX

how about this: I am not attracted to any of my guy friends so I am safe!?

Well, sure you might be safe from any feelings but what about them? Oh, and don't bother asking them they won't tell you the truth.

Posted by: b_reed23

I have a lot of guy friends, and my hubby has a lot of woman friends, and we've never had any problems

Posted by: Beto

Well, If you don´t feel any atraction to your guy friends I think there is no problem, but what happens if you atract your guy friends?

by the way great body b_reed23

C ya

Posted by: largepkg

Quote:

Originally Posted by b_reed23

I have a lot of guy friends, and my hubby has a lot of woman friends, and we've never had any problems

I think as long as you're intentions or lack there of are clear then you probably won't have any problems. However, if the other person is interested in you they may always want you in that other way. Just because you have no interest doesn't mean they have none.

Posted by: Pepper

It obviously CAN be done, but usually the guy at least wants to sleep with the woman. I think Harry (as in When Harry Met Sally) was pretty much correct.

Posted by: Pepper

oh, and let's not forget Chris Rock...didn't he say that women with men friends were just wanting to have options down the road....

In case of emergency....

Posted by: b_reed23

well, I have had a little trouble with a couple guys in the past trying to..um.."put the moves" on me, well, lets just say it didn't get far....you guys are probably right though...if there's no attraction, there's no trouble!

p.s...thanks Beto!!

Posted by: I Are Baboon

There is a difference between thinking someone is attractive and wanting to bone them, and actually acting on those feelings. I have had plenty of female friends that were just that....friends. And look at me...how could any woman NOT want to bone me?

Posted by: Witmaster

Anna,

Don't over-analyze this. Yes, you are safe to have male friends. Enjoy yourself and thier company.

I have many female friends. Sure, like you, I drift into the occasional "impure thought" but I quickly dismiss these things and focus on what matters most to me.

Be yourself. Don't get hung up on the "mechanics" of male vs. female plutonics. Just be you. Let the rest sort itself out naturally. When you meet the right guy, you'll know. If one of your friends starts to press with "unwanted advances" then TELL HIM. If he is really your friend, he will respect you more.

Posted by: AnnaDTX

Bone??? people still use that word?

Today I am going to test my friend theory . . . I am taking my friend shopping for cologne, hopefully I can keep my paws off him, the cologne I am suggesting drives me NUTS!!!

Posted by: I Are Baboon

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnaDTX

Bone??? people still use that word?

I choose my words carefully when I am typing on my PC at work.

Posted by: Witmaster

I use "Bone" or "Tool"

Posted by: Shae

Quote:

Originally Posted by b_reed23

I have a lot of guy friends.

Me too. Only one of them fell in love with me and I fell in love with him long ago.

Posted by: AnnaDTX

thanks guy for all your answers!

Posted by: Little Wing

i have male friends and i've had them for a very long time and yes they harbor some hope that things will take a turn for romance or sex. after this many years of no luck they still are hopeful. i think a lot of the time the only happily platonic male buddy is a gay one.

Posted by: The Monkey Man

Yes all that + all your guy friends will
angle to CockBlock any new guy you are looking to meet...

Territory.

But if you do meet someone, you must ask "unavailable" male friends
to read into his lines of BS for you...

You and your GF's cannot do this, a pickup strategy is designed to
counteract female intuition...

Only an uninvolved male friend "like a brother-in-law"
or other happily married mature man (over 28), will know what is fact,
and what is most likely fiction

Posted by: Cowbell

I have a lot of female friends but I have also lost relationships due to it (it is ok for the other person to get jealous but if you do you are just childish)

Posted by: Jeeper

A lot of guys believe that if they hang out with a girl long enough that eventually she will be in a position where they can get her in the sack. Whether this is after a bad breakup or some other reason. Harry was right, men and women cant really be friends. Also determine if you are hanging out with them simply because you know they want you and you really like the attention. I know more than a few women who have multiple male friends who always hit on them and they simply like the attention.

Posted by: The Monkey Man

You also realize that having 5 guys around you, gives another impression
to prospective suitors in a social situation...

A really nice or clean-cut trustworthy guy,
"MAY" view this as whoreish and move-on to a less dramatic target

(Even if this is nowhere near the case)

Posted by: MasterMind

i know it's been a while since the last post but i had to say something........i have never hada friend that is a chick that i wouldn't or haven't thought about screwing........main reason i become friends with them is to try and screw them

I hate it that chicks aren't the same way though and believe me they are...i don't wanna ruin the friendship

one exception......the guy will make friends with the chick/chicks he wants to screw....you will never see a guy make friends with a chick he would not screw...the friends like that are like that cause your trying to hook up with one of there friends or it's just called friends cause you talk to them every now and then like the friendly hello

don't mean to sound like a dickhead but it's true

Posted by: TJ Cline

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnaDTX

I had a conversation with my ex last night and I was telling him that I am making new friends blah, blah . . and most of them are guys, i have known these people for quite some time and none of them ever tried anything with me and vice versa. But he insists that my friendships will not last. WHY? I refuse to believe it. I like hanging with the boys they take care of me.

is there such a thing as JUST FRIENDS??

Guy friends are dudes who want to fuck you...
No man is your friend......

Posted by: Mudge

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnnaDTX

is there such a thing as JUST FRIENDS??

Yes and no, it depends completely on the people in question.

For a man, or a woman to say - that all men or women are like ............... is complete horseshit.

He or she who speaks evil, is probably the one who did it. Lines like "oh come on, all guys want to have sex with you" coming from a guy, is self incriminating about their own thinking patterns and/or their insane jealousy issues which could lead to control issues.

Dont even trip about his obvious personal security problems. I LIVED with a best friend for over a year and didn't do anything sexual with her nor did I try, but she was still a very close friend to me.

Posted by: Mudge

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Monkey Man

You also realize that having 5 guys around you, gives another impression
to prospective suitors in a social situation...

A really nice or clean-cut trustworthy guy,
"MAY" view this as whoreish and move-on to a less dramatic target

(Even if this is nowhere near the case)

I agree completely. People assumed my friend and I were an item, but that wasn't her question

If she didn't know that well... now she knows!

Posted by: TJ Cline

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mudge

I LIVED with a best friend for over a year and didn't do anything sexual with her nor did I try, but she was still a very close friend to me.

Some questions.

1. do/did you consider her a sexy beautiful woman... ?

2. Did you two ever screw around together before during or after this living arrangement.

3.Were you two dating other people at the time.....for example all 4 of you were friends...?

4. did either of you ever try and start any sexual actions between you two?

5. did you ever think about having sex with her?

Posted by: abdulla

This is the exact opposite of how most guys react

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