sex & whip cream & cutting? [Forum Archive]

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sex & whip cream & cutting?

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Posted by: Ronald

this girl wanted me to lick whip cream off her body and i told her i couldnt cause i was cutting. so i got cottage cheese instead.

Posted by: Mrquest

Thats nasty, wipped cream is like 100 calories, you might as well.

Posted by: Mista

Hahahahahahahahaha

Posted by: red99svt

Your a retard..I would have used it as my cheat meal lol.. Gross I hope she didnt let you put cottage cheese on her...

Posted by: DontStop

you'd burn it off if u were having rough sex

Posted by: Malley

Um........

Posted by: danzik17

This is one of those situations where I would say "fuck the cut"

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

you'd burn it off if u were having rough sex

she was pretty hot i only lasted about 15 pumps. But the 2nd time was better for her

Posted by: DontStop

15? ouch. I would have paid to have seen the look of dissapointment in her face in round 1

Posted by: mboylan86

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronald

she was pretty hot i only lasted about 15 pumps. But the 2nd time was better for her

eh, you were counting?? i usually have my mind on other things.
did u bring a calculater?

Posted by: DontStop

maybe it was a rough estimate.

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

maybe it was a rough estimate.

yeah it was jsut a guess, and im prolly exaggerating with the time it took

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by mboylan86

eh, you were counting?? i usually have my mind on other things.
did u bring a calculater?

what do you think about?

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

15? ouch. I would have paid to have seen the look of dissapointment in her face in round 1

you dont have to pay, i can do that with you for free!

Posted by: ReproMan

Posted by: MACCA

MY girlfriend loves the cottage cheese around my dick.....well thats what i tell her it is..........

Posted by: DontStop

bahah i read once to stick a donut around a guys dick and the nibble it off lol
i told my friend kyle and he was like "thatd be a bit sticky"

i totally called a pun but he didnt get it

Posted by: Bakerboy

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

bahah i read once to stick a donut around a guys dick and the nibble it off lol
i told my friend kyle and he was like "thatd be a bit sticky"

i totally called a pun but he didnt get it

1. That's not a pun.
2. If a guy can fit his dick in a donut hole, it's nothing to brag about. lol

Posted by: DontStop

It is a pun
Thatd be sticky? Sticky as in cum. and sticky as in glae.
It's a play on words
the dony would be sticky, but if you were getting head itd eventually be sticky anyway

Posted by: vortrit

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronald

she was pretty hot i only lasted about 15 pumps. But the 2nd time was better for her

Sweet! You beat your record of 14 pumps!

J/K!

Posted by: mboylan86

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronald

what do you think about?

eh.......... tax returns?

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by mboylan86

eh.......... tax returns?

haha nice, nothing like sex and a tax return

Posted by: DontStop

I havent had sex since January. I have so much pent up sex energy i could bust a uterus

Posted by: vortrit

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

I havent had sex since January. I have so much pent up sex energy i could bust a uterus

That don't sound good...

Posted by: DontStop

Not at all. I havent even "slept" with my bf yet. And it's at the point that if i even see a bulge i have to take a few deep breaths.

Posted by: vortrit

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

Not at all. I havent even "slept" with my bf yet. And it's at the point that if i even see a bulge i have to take a few deep breaths.

Posted by: DontStop

"Shine On! Shine On!"

Good ol Van Halen

Posted by: vortrit

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

"Shine On! Shine On!"

Good ol Van Halen

I don't know that song. I only listen to heavy music (mostly). No whipped cream.

Posted by: DontStop

Humans Being

Posted by: vortrit

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

Humans Being

Is that Van Halen or what I like to call Van Hagar?

The early stuff was good, but Hagar I can't stand.

Posted by: DontStop

No idea. I just like the riff at the beginning

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

Not at all. I havent even "slept" with my bf yet. And it's at the point that if i even see a bulge i have to take a few deep breaths.

i dont know how you women do it, im horny all day and a few deep breaths doesnt help

Posted by: DontStop

Well theres not much i can do about it

Posted by: danzik17

Sure there is

Posted by: Ronald

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

Well theres not much i can do about it

do you have on a chastity belt?

Posted by: DontStop

Nope. Id rather have someone else "do it"

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Right on Vortrit, that's the only music with balls.

DontStop, of course it's better to have soMEone else do it but if it's at the point where you're hyperventalating at the site of someone else's cash and prizes through their pants you really should find some alone time and blow the dam.

Posted by: DontStop

I do have my alone time. I just rather it be someone else. Makes things more interesting anyway. I've always had a thing for bulges. they are SUCH a tease

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Remind me to wear spandex shorts around you.

Posted by: DontStop

OMG i wont even go into detail about how much i love it. I went to canmore this wknd. still havent got laid. so now bulges are just driving me nuts, no pun intended

Posted by: NeilPearson

I have an 18 year old nephew in Calgary and I am just he'd help you out.

Posted by: DontStop

I was just in calgary this wknd.
i have a bunch of friends down there.
but i have a bf and like i said, i havent even seen him naked

Posted by: NeilPearson

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

I was just in calgary this wknd.
i have a bunch of friends down there.
but i have a bf and like i said, i havent even seen him naked

Just attack him... it's not too hard. At your age you should have lots of 'boyfriends', not just one.

Is your boyfriend gay? What kind of straight guy would go out with you for more than a week and not close the deal

Posted by: DontStop

I could go off with someone else but i actually really just want my bf.
The problem is i hardly get to see him, and never really have an oppurtunity to attack.
bah

Posted by: Ronald

ok this thread is about eating cottage cheese off of women, not dick

Posted by: DontStop

It's about dick now.

Posted by: ava

Can somebody go help this poor girl out? Cant you see she's in need? I would but I dont think my wife would appreciate it very much.

Posted by: Bakerboy

^ I would but I'm too old for her.

Posted by: NeilPearson

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bakerboy

^ I would but I'm too old for her.

I would but I'm not in Edmonton anymore... (34 isn't too old for 18 is it?)

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Calm down guys, I'm working on it. Just need to get off work and get to the Airport.

Posted by: Gazhole

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plateau_Max

Calm down guys, I'm working on it. Just need to get off work and get to the Airport.

I believe in you!

Posted by: DontStop

finally someones coming to save me. but be wary, there are many obstacles along the way...one being the traffic on the Yellowhead

Posted by: Gazhole

Quote:

Originally Posted by DontStop

finally someones coming to save me. but be wary, there are many obstacles along the way...one being the traffic on the Yellowhead

Is that anything like Blue Balls?

Posted by: Bakerboy

It's an (inside) regional joke.

Posted by: ReproMan

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gazhole

Is that anything like Blue Balls?

Nah. I think they're talking about Asian hookers.

Posted by: Bakerboy

Quote:

Originally Posted by ReproMan

Nah. I think they're talking about Asian hookers.

Posted by: ReproMan

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bakerboy

Posted by: Plateau_Max

My motorcycle cuts through all kinds of traffic... I'll be sure to bring it with me.

Posted by: DontStop

You obviously havent seen the yellowhead during rush hour. nuts. an ambulance cant even get through it's so packed...ive seen :|

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Yeah I ride between cars. That's what I'm sayin... it doesn't matter how many cars packed it is.

Just got a new bike yesterday everyone! Here's a picture of one that looks exactly like it.

Anyone notice I went elite style this morning? Oh I got a new tattoo as well. It's going to burn when I run today...

Posted by: DontStop

lucky bugger. how much was that? My BF is looking to buy a bike this summer. The only bike i've ever been on was 19inchpumps and i loved it!! I love going fast and doing crazy maneuvers in things like that.
Hell you should see me quadding, i could quad off a cliff and not care.

I wish i had a car that was a transformer so i could just get it to walk over people in traffic and crush ANYONE who cut me off

...ya

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Got it for $17,000. I actually only recently learned to do a stoppie properly. I'll have to play with the brake sensitivity on it for a few days before I try one on the Ducati though.

Nah you don't need a transformer car, just get a bike, or a car like mine.

I should get a grill like this one I'm thinking.

Posted by: DontStop

i'm considering joing the Air Force now.

Posted by: Bakerboy

Quote:

Originally Posted by ReproMan

Back at ya junior.

Posted by: Witchblade

Oh this reminds me of a situation I had with a girl.

We were about to have sex and during the foreplay I came up with this genious idea of spraying whip cream all over her body (pun intended). Anyway that's what I did and I nearly emptied the entire can. She loved it til she saw this rather shocked look on my face.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
I thought wait a minute I don't even like whip cream... Fuck that's like pure sugar and saturated fat and a shitload of it too... Aw well, fuck it.
So I replied "Nothing," and licked it all off.

I mean c'mon man, replace it with cottage cheese? I thought you were shitting me.

Posted by: DontStop

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Most of the money I make comes from my investments in the real estate market. The Air Force doesn't pay well. I started putting money away when I was 16 and once it hit 10k I invested it and have been trading it around ever since (about 2 years).

Hey DS I'm futureproof! *wink* hahahahaha

Posted by: DontStop

Well damn.
I put away my tax money, and i get money from the government. however, i dont know where i can invest it...I'll probably have to pay for school on my own so...I already know where it's going..

But my goal is to buy some land and get some horses and breed them.
Fresians...

i want i want.

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Most "land" I have in one spot is 55 acres in Montana. I'm sure you'd want something more like 100-125 though.

Posted by: DontStop

Yah
mega expensive though
the location i want is in the mountains around bragg creek.

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Do you have a journal? Just wondering what you do to work out. I finally just posted a journal yesterday.

My friend called me this morning and said he saw it on there and he was intimidated by my cardio days hahaha. The kind of thing I always respond with "hey how intimidating would something you've trained nearly every day for 5 years be?"

I still don't get it though, from a girl's perspective DS would you be weirded out of a guy put cottage cheese on you instead of whipped cream because he was keeping to his diet?

I say make fantasy day and cheet meal day the SAME day.

Posted by: DontStop

Quote:

Originally Posted by Plateau_Max

Do you have a journal? Just wondering what you do to work out. I finally just posted a journal yesterday.

My friend called me this morning and said he saw it on there and he was intimidated by my cardio days hahaha. The kind of thing I always respond with "hey how intimidating would something you've trained nearly every day for 5 years be?"

I still don't get it though, from a girl's perspective DS would you be weirded out of a guy put cottage cheese on you instead of whipped cream because he was keeping to his diet?

I say make fantasy day and cheet meal day the SAME day.

I have a journal but was haulted because of injury. I'd be weirded out by any guy licking food off of me. im just not into that

Posted by: Plateau_Max

Have you tried it? I did that once, it was alright but we both felt kinda sticky and ended up doing the wet rag thing before we got busy and that sort of interruption is best avoided IMHO

Posted by: DontStop

Never tried it. Dont really want to. I'm not comfortable with myself enough to even let someone lick me all over.
Which goes hand in hand with me not liking getting eatin out

Posted by: Gazhole

Quote:

Originally Posted by ReproMan

Nah. I think they're talking about Asian hookers.

Probably a good thing, blue balls is bad enough without having to worry about yellow head, too.

Last thing you want when a date is going well is to have a fucking rainbow in your pants...

Posted by: Bakerboy

Nyotaimori

If you are going to eat something off a woman it should at least taste good.

Posted by: Plateau_Max

I call the lobster tails...

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