Pitboss

Up in the morning with the rising sun

I forgot what it's like to wake up early. I kind of like it

Well gonna head to the gym here in a few, shoulders and traps I think is the plan.

So last night I get a phone call from "a friend" she happens to live in my old place, 3 doors down. She wanted me to come over and keep her safe from some crazy guy that used to be her friend for 5 years. Then they fooled around he become obsessive.

Here is a girl I have tried to go out with me. Even to the point of asking her to take me out for my b-day just she could have some excuse to take me out. Yeah that was desperation there. I've been there a couple of times for her. Had to listen to her complain about be alone as she is crying in my arms. HELLO????

I mean I felt good for being able to help her out last night and I did tell her to call me if she ever needed me for things like that. But still. I so totally felt like I was back in high school with the girl I have a huge crush on and she just totally doesn't see it or care.

Blah.

Oh well got other things to think about. Other people to meet. Oh and got to get ready for my wedding with J'bo in Vegas. I just don't see Dale being ready to settle down.. LOL

Oh another note. I haven't talked, called or recieved a call from Amanda since... Sunday. It's been hard. Still looking at my phone every 5 minutes but I'm getting better... okay that's a lie. I miss the fuck out of her. As bad as she was she was that good to

Blah again.

Hey it's a beautiful day. It's hump day!! It's just another day to experince in this short, short life and I'm going to make the most of it!

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|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

naturaltan

as long as it's chocolate ice cream, you'll be a ripped monster in no time.

just kick'in it in the ole Charger

Pitboss

Oh damn. I've been mixing it up. A little of that, a little of that and yesterday a quart of Almond Joy ice cream. It was okay but I'd rather have something with peanut butter in it

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Damn scale says 174.8 today. No fair. How much more ice cream do I have to eat???? Gawd I feel skinny. Especially after wearing a tamk top to the gym doing shoulders and seeing the awesome pump I got. Man they swole up like something else. I looked so out of proportion. Huge shoulders, arms looking decent and no chest or back!! blah!!!

Shoulders

Miltary press: warm up 95lbs 2x15
125lbs x 11
135lbs x 9
135lbs x 8
... damn they are a little sore and weak from yesterday oops.

Cables.. I love cables over db!!!
side lateral raises (per side)
30lbs x 13
35lbs x 9
30lbs x 11

Bent over
30lbs x 14
35lbs x 12
35lbs x 10
oh they burn!!!!!

Upright BB rows
95lbs x 10
95lbx x 9

I'm done. Sad a year ago I was doing 135 with uprights.. eek

Traps
db's
70lbs x 17
75lbs x 14
75lbs x 13

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****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Okay I have one word "ouch"!! After three days in the gym my whole upper body is screaming!! Funny thing though is my muscles are still pumped, okay maybe it's more like swollen from over doing it. But a few people commented on the way I look.. that was more motivation than I really needed but cool!!

So tomorrow is legs.. whew I hate legs but gonna do it. 4 days in a row!! It's bad when you can get excited about a remark like that but it's been a tough year already.

Speaking of a tough year. It's time to pull the Trojans out from the dust and put em in the wallet. No more Mr nice guy!! Okay don't take that wrong I am so far from the player, but I'm working on building up my confidence. I lost it a long time ago. I lost a lot of me. I'm a bit like Humpty Dumpty and now we need to put the pieces back together again.

I think anyone that has been a semi long term relationship goes through this stage. You know the "no one is going to want me" stage. I may still have a broken heart but I'll be damned if I'm going to be a broken man!!

Another great day is coming to an end. Can't wait until tomorrow!!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

The 4th morning and I feel like I've been hit with baseball bats. My chest feels like it gonna explode!! Can't raise my arms above my head and it feels like someone is constantly pushing on my back. Thankfully my lower body is intact... for now.

Watched the Last Samuri last night. Great movie I thought. Made me tear up a couple times... yeah I cry at movies.

Almost broke down and called Amanda. I just wanted to say hi. I thought about her alot yesterday and started to wonder if we are playing the who's gonna breakdown first game. It might be like that. I miss her I try to let go but just can't seem to let that last little part of hope leave my heart.

I think the toughest part is being alone. It's so hard when you don't want to be alone in the world anymore. I want a relationship! I want to be able to have that same person to hold each and every night. Cuddle up in front of the tv. Waking up to. But I don't want a rebound person. I want someone I truly care for and that I want to spend the rest of my life with. Someone who wants me for me and has the deepest respect for the vows, especially the richer or poorer part.

Came to a silly conclusion the other day. Fairy tales philosophy is what I call it.

A woman writes the fairy tale where the girl that has nothing finds her Prince charming, who has everything.

A man writes the fairy tale where he finds the girl and cares less what she has or does.

Anyway not trying to bring anything or anyone down here. Just need a place to put my thoughts. Yeah another "Diary of a Madman II"

Let me make one thing clear. I do not feel sorry for myself. I am responsible for my actions and where they have led me in life. No one else is to blame. I choose to leave my wonderful, loving wife. I put myself in a position to lose my job. I was careless with my finicial decisions that led me to where I live, how I live. I choose the job I have rather than finding something better. I did these things. Would I go back and make changes? Sure. But can't.

It's all me. It's up to me to make me better. To make things in life better for me, for Carter and for who ever wants to be a part of my life. I will make these changes one day at a time. Right now it's about me. When I find the me I'm completely happy with then other changes will take place. I've spent my whole life being a quitter. I figure I've lived close to half my life now and I'm done quitting. I quit being a quitter!!! LOL

Well I've said what I needed to today. Got a leg workout waiting.

Have a grape day everyone!!!!!!!!!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Hmm been a long time since I did legs. Too long!

Warmed up on the bike. Just after that my quads were not too happy with me.

Leg extensions
80lbs x 15
70lbs x 15
warm up.. however I was too close to failure at the last few reps and I wasn't going to drop the w8!!

Hack squat
45 a side x 20
70 a side x 15
90 a side x 12

okay I can't do more. I wanted to but my quads were screaming. Have to work it up little at a time.

Leg curls
70 x 12
80 x 11

I can't walk.. I'm weak.

Seat calves raises
90lbs x 18
90lbs x 17
90lbs x 17

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

PreMier

Damn, I was in love once. It took me close to 6 months to get over it. But the best thing to do is NOT talk to the person, because when you do SO many feelings come rushing back. You need to complete the healing process, and sadly it is best done alone. Just keep your head up, keep hitting the gym, and have a positive outlook on life. Everything will turn around for the better

P-side Inc.

"the post-workout high is more profound than any drug-induced rush imaginable." -Dante B.

Pitboss

Thanks!! I know what I have to do I think one the hardest parts is letting go of the friendship we had. Maybe someday we can be friends again but right now it's way to hard, especially when she tells about things happening in her life...

But hey it's been another great day!! I was supposed to go out with girl tuesday night but she kind of blew me off. But we discussed possibly going out Friday afternoon but now I had to blow her off... and now we are discussing still going out.. she actually brought it up. So sweet I got a hottie wanting to go out with lil ole PB!!!!

Friday my day is booked! My only day off and I spend it working another way. I have 2 Harley/Custom bike shops to visit. Both are no where near each other of course. One wants to look at my shirts and the other want to carry them. So got to get my inventory in check tonight. Then I have the tattoo shop I have to visit to restock their orders. I have a 2pm meeting with that super hot 34 year old, mother of two, ex-runway model. This is the girl I want. Want for a long term gig. She so far has been perfect!! Well except being taller than me...

So I'm a busy driving in the LA traffic kind of guy tomorrow.

I'm still tight, legs aren't yet but I know they will be. But I still might hit the gym tomorrow to start my split. I'm one of those lucky bastards that can get away with what some call over training. I don't need more than 3 days rest per body part and I grow. So maybe I'll grow some tomorrow!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

PreMier

Yea, you cant be friends untill both of you have no sexual feelings for the other. Thats the way it is.

Ex runway model? Have you asked her out?

P-side Inc.

"the post-workout high is more profound than any drug-induced rush imaginable." -Dante B.

Pitboss

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!! So far she is all business. But she keeps sending me signals, or at least what I think ar signals. Hell she even talks to my mom, that's how I met her. My mom makes it sound like she's interested.... damn women and their conspiracies!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Hmm think I will post a poll... not on this subject really. But I know what you mean. I think women can turn of these.. what lustful desires much easier than men can.

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

PreMier

Tell your mom to hook you up! lol Seriously, have her put in a good word or three

P-side Inc.

"the post-workout high is more profound than any drug-induced rush imaginable." -Dante B.

Pitboss

She has, plenty of times. But it's all on this girls hands now. I don't want to become an annoying gnat, but I don't want to totally ignore her either. We'll see how tomorrow goes. Maybe if I ask in person I'll at least get a response.

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Well tonight was rather interesting. I got a call form the 24 year old I have mentioned a couple of times. Her name is Amber. She asked if I'd come keep her company at work since it was slow. Okay don't have to ask me twice. Not sure if that was a mistake or not at this point. So we hung out and then went to Denny's afterwards. We talked, we laughed, we got a long pretty good. Hell we even ordered the same thing.

I walked her to her car, reached out to give her a hug... oh the opportunity was there but I didn't take it. Not sure why. Maybe I was actualy using the right brain and thought that this wasn't a date, be a gentleman, don't rush anything. But I could have, wanted to... damn what the hell was I thinking?? oops wrong brain.

Okay so what the hell does a 24 year old find attractive in a 37 year old??? That's a little bothering to me. Hey I don't have a problem with age difference. She failry mature. Funny. Always smiling, I mean always which is something I'd love to have around me. It just seems weird, out of place, ya know??

It's late. Have a busy day.

Oh phone...

cool date on Monday.

this is weird, but I'm liking it.

Oh and on a finally note Amanda called at 11:48 and didn't leave a message. She knows I hate that and probably did it on purpose!! Hey I win!! She broke down and called me first..

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

butterfly

I'm boycotting any discussion on Amanda.

~Ann
We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open.
-Harry Edwards

J'Bo

hold on hold on.
i dont read the journal for a couple days and now we are talking about amanda
PB PB PB what have we told you about that case?
I have not even read the posts above, all i needed was to hear bf mention amanda and now your gonna get it

....and thats my $.02

Pitboss

I won't mention her by name anymore

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|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Sorry I'll try not to do it anymore .... it's just, well ya know. But hey I had my first date since out break up. Well it was more like breakfast and a hug goodnight. But we are going out Monday night I think. See that's a good thing

Maybe, just maybe I might have sex again this year!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

J'Bo

No hun i dont i dont know why your a sucker for punishment. You dont miss her you miss having someone to be beside you. Sometimes we get confused with the two

thats a good thing

....and thats my $.02

Pitboss

I know. Don't confuse love with loneliness.

Gee wonder who said that a thousand times

Hey wait one minute!! You just want me for yourself!!! Okay

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Got a late start but still hit the gym but had to cut it short.

No Bi's just back..

Lat pulldowns
3 warm up sets
150 x 10
160 x 8
160 x 7.5

Seated Hammer Strength row machine thingy... I have no idea LOL
90lbs a side x 13
115 a side x 10
115 a side x 9

Close grip pulldowns
150 x 10
150 x 8
150 x 8



Oh weight is at 179.2!!!!! See if that changes tomorrow but I do feel the difference from earlier in the week. Hmm nearly 5 lbs in a week, 2 weeks left in this month.. maybe I can get to 190!! Lots and lots of ice cream!!!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

J'Bo

i love how you always turn things around PB

Ice cream I want maple walnut with a scoop of bubble gum on top please

....and thats my $.02

Pitboss

What???

Go ahead have it. I won't tell. I swear!!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

Pitboss

Well had a late date last night with the 24 yo Amber. We just hung out on the couch, talked about alot. She threw her legs over my legs and I massaged her thighs, calves, and feet during the course of our night... left at 5am yawn!! We cuddled a little, held hands alot. I still haven't kissd her. But I needed that type of company last night. It was comforting. It was really nice. I think she needed it too. We were both extremely comfortable with each other. It was different, it was like we have been together for sometime. Nothing awkward, just very, very comfortable.

Anyhow it was really good

Have a great day everyone!!!!

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

J'Bo

24 are you sure?

....and thats my $.02

Pitboss

I don't really know to be honest. I mean the thing that I am most uncomfortable about would be meeting her family. I haven't a clue how old they are but what if they had her when they were young.. damn they could be early 40's or so. That's weird. I know I'd be rather.... uncomfortable if it was my daughter.

I'm going to give it a little time. See how things work out between us. She has already stressed to me that she has no problems with the age difference. Time will tell. I like her as a person. She has agreat attitude. She's always smiling and laughing and I need that around me. It's more than just a sexual attraction and that's what attracted me to her. Okay fine it was the sexual attraction first and the great personality second. If it works out that we end up just friends that's something I can accept easily.

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

J'Bo

i guess. how would your son like having a step mom only 4 years older than him sorry i couldnt resist i dont know it sounds kinda fishy to me and i think that you need to go for someone a little more mature. I know i wouldnt want a 24 influencing my child (if i had one) cause she still is one. JMHO though.

....and thats my $.02

Pitboss

So when are you moving to LA????????????????????

Well at this point I haven't really seen much immaturity from her. No more than any average person.

Although I kept waiting for the waitress/waiter to ask if my "daughter" wanted a refill on her water last night..

Of course I'm not committing myself to her at this point. We just met a little over a week ago. She's no where near ready to get involved with anyone either. At this point I guess you could say we just both enjoy the company of each other. That's fine with me. We went to dinner and a movie. Much better than going by yourself.

167 170 175 180 185 190 195 196 197 198 199 200
|- -|----|----|----|----|----|---|---|---|---|---|
****
^^^^^^^^^^^^^Progress^^^^^^^^^^^^^
2/22- ?? my gym membership expired!!
2/11- 170lbs
2/4 - 167lbs

naturaltan

And at what age does one become mature Jbo? And why does it seem fishy?

PB ... if time shows that you're happy and she's happy, go for it.

just kick'in it in the ole Charger