jstar

Hey Everyone

I am back. I felt I needed a break from journaling but then I realized that this board plays an important part in keeping me accountable and motivated. Without this board and all of you I don't feel like I have a healthy outlet in my life to rant about all the things that have been going on. (Oh boy, get prepared, there is a lot.) Well part of the reason I temporarily quit posting was because of my job and just being too busy between my gym and the job, as I am sure most of you can relate. Well that won't be a problem anymore because last week I was fired from my job. I was horrified by the whole thing and did not see it coming a mile away. I was there for only two months and working as a consultant for her home business. It was just me and her, my boss, so I guess she just lets people go left and right as she wants. Unlike in a real company where you need a freaking reason. Since this happened I have been depressed about it but my family has been supportive and knows that it wasn't my fault. I have been trying to step back and look at the whole thing because I know I did the best job I could and gave it my all and that is all I could do. I am over it. So now I have no health insurance, no income, no job. I called unemployment but I will have to wait and see if they allow me to collect again. If you get fired they usually don't let you but then I can appeal it - and that is probably a pain in the ass. So I am screwed, but that is ok. Thank God I did not make any offers on the condos I saw and thank God I still live with my parents or I would be sleeping in the park.

Coupled with that drama is the issues between me and my man and my possibly moving to Florida. My family is raring to go and relocate (but they say this all the time so I don't know how serious they are). We are going down for 2 weeks at the end of this month to check it out since none of us have ever been there. I am excited about the trip and my aunt gave us all these real estate magazines of houses in FL and OMG they are all so gorgeous and affordable. I could totally afford to by a house there - but NOT here. Where I live a small 5 room cape is 400,000. Yeah right!

It is a HUGE decision for me to decide to relocate and my man doesn't want to go at all. We (he) decided to stay friends and just leave it at that for now. It is so sad, I think eventually he will meet someone else and since he is too much of a gentleman to keep talking to his ex (me) while he is seeing someone else then I guess we will eventually just separate for good. Not only do I lose someone I love but also my best friend. It sucks to say the least.

All signs are pointing for me to go - I lose my job, I lose my bf, none of my friends are ever home lately so I have no one to talk to and I am going insane, my family wants to move, I can't find a job here, the list goes on and on. Jeez, if I do move I am going to become a personal trainer, live in a beach front condo or maybe a house and compete. Sounds like a nice life.

Now onto the actual health and fitness stuff:

I decided to hook up with an online trainer who is also an IFBB pro figure competitor. She is awesome!!! My diet and training is going great, I love it.
I plan to compete in 3 shows in the fall and she is helping me get ready for them. The best thing is that she emails me a lot so I don't slip. With all the other baggage going on in my life right now I am just glad I have something positive to focus on. In this journal I don't plan to post my exact diet and training but I will post how things are going, measurements, pictures, and everything else.

sftwrngnr

Congrats on not giving up! Life is inherently unpredictable... ya gotta just pick yerself up by the boots, and keep goin'!
-Dan

"Dude... thats a lot-a weight... I mean yer like... what... 50??" Said to me by a 17 year old when I was doing deadlifts.
--------------------------------------
Current Stats:
Age: 39
Squat: 585 Bench: 265 (STILL Pathetic) Deadlift: 565 Weight: 218
Goals:
Interrupted due to accident !
Rehab journal:
Dan's rehab journal
Training journal:
Dan's westside training journal

JLB001

Moving may be a fresh start that you need. And ya know what... Craig may decide to open his practice in Florida too! His parents live down there close to Orlando.

Try not to stress over everything, easier said than done at times, but the stress is just added stress. LOL

Which Pro did you decide on? I'm excited to see how things progress!

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."

jstar

Thanks Dan! When it rains it pours, in my life anyways. I think the best thing for me is to look at what I can do instead of what I can't do since that is what is stressing me out.

Jodie - hello girl! are you guys moving to Orlando if Craig moves his practice (duh, I guess so huh LOL)? I am planning to move to the Tampa area so I will be close by. Oh, I am working with Stacy Hylton - she is super, super great.
I really can't post up my diet/training programs because that would be wrong but I will journal and update without giving away the secrets . She has really tailored this plan to me specifically so I am excited to see how things progress too. It has only been a week so far, but I am already feeling better.

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

JLB001

It's alright. Just asking because I didn't know if I knew them or not.
Stick with it! The results will follow.

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."

nikegurl

That's the real secret right there!

Tomorrow may be the best day of your life.

Or not.

ncgirl21

Hey girl!! Glad your back , I was wondering where you took off too ?? Good Luck with your workout and diet, I'm sure you'll do awesome and I'll be following along. Don't stress the job or the boyfrined, you deserve better in BOTH situations!!

http://stephlg.proboards44.com/index.cgi#general

jstar

Hey guys - thanks alot!!!

I already feel better. It is SO TRUE - the only time you see results is by consistently doing the right things. So many things in my life are changing right now and I am a person who is terrified of change, so naturally I resist. I will try to go with the flow, since it will lead me to a better place both physically and mentally.

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

jstar

Wed June 2nd

Going to the gym twice today.

First workout:
45 min intervals on the elliptical
I hate first thing in the am cardio. Today was really pm cardio since I slept really late. No that I have no job keeping to an early schedule will be a challenge. Starting tomorrow I am going to aim to get up consistently around 7 am. I don't want to mess with my meal times either.

Second Workout:
Arms then cardio (stepper and treadmill)
Great workout. I finished at 10pm. Egads I need to reset my inner clock!

Todays Meals:
Went according to plan.

Meals:
I have more meals than ever. Somedays have 7. I discovered talapia since Stacy wants me eating white fish now - yummy. I am eating lots more veggies, less carbs (but not too low at all). The thing I struggle with is the "no condiments" rule. She wants me to stick to this specific diet until I get back from FL on July 11th. Then we switch things up again. She wants me to lose 5-8 lbs of fat in this phase.

Contests:
9/25 OCB Figure Competition
10/2 OCB Figure Competition
10/23 USBF Figure Competition

All are small shows but I am thrilled to do a small show after doing 2 huge ones. I hope to keep working with Stacy during the offseason as well to add more size to my upper body and help me progress.

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

Stacey

STAR!!! I'm So HAPPY to see you back--And I think moving to Florida will be a great change for you!! (I know..I hate change to.. real bad.. but this may just be Your Oppurtunity to change so much stuff in your life)

Thats great your working with a trainer--I have heard she is Awesome!!

I Believe in the Impossible!!!

JLB001

Girl...you better get up early to do that cardio! if the meals are off, you feel all messed up for the day. (well, I do anyways).

Sam's Wholesale has good size bags of Talapia, 2 fillets equal 4 oz. Yummy stuff! Throw it in a skillet sprayed with Pam and some seasoning. Quick and easy! Turkey and Fish are the only things I can have right now besides eggs. Are you allowed Salsa and Mustard?

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."

atherjen

StaryStar, SOOO glad to see you back around girl!!! and back with a postive attitude!
that is very cool that your working with that woman! She should serve as super help for you!! I only wish you the best girl! Thats a ton of plans on your plate! Especially with a ot changes in your life. you know... change is good

" To dream anything you want to dream: That is the beauty of the human mind. To do anything you want to do: That is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits: that is the courage to succeed."

NPC Southern Classic, June 3rd
NPC Cajun Classic, June 10th
NPC Mississippi State July 22nd

shortstuff

J so good to have you back!!! Was wondering what happened to yah...... I am so glad you figured stuff out. I am hearing everyone competing and I want to also, but man I need to hold myself back for a while. Congrats hun!!!! I am glad you are back we are here for you

Good things come to those who wait........

Jill

This is so friggin weird. I was thinking about you and where you've been this am, and was gonna go fish for your journal. Glad to have you back I missed you

Oh ya when it rains it really does pour.....Hope your doing ok. Glad to hear about the new trainer, good luck with all your goals. Remember: life IS what you make of it, just try to stay positive, I know you are one strong lady!

Steve and I are off to cuba Friday, am real excited! Talk to ya soon darlin! *hugs*

jstar

I feel so loved You guys rock!!!! I missed you all too, believe me I just needed to take a step back and think about things. I think the worst of stuff is over and yes, change is GOOD. I am starting to realize that for real now!

Stacey - Hey I agree. I think FL will be nice and the best part of all - no more snow. (How could I resist that?) I am still on the fence but after my trip maybe I can make a decision. Gee, if I do move I am throwing a big pool party at my place and you are all invited! How are things with you? Are you guys still trying for a little baby? I will catch up on your journal now that I have time ...oh what did you hear about Stacy? She is really great, WOW!

Jodie - I do feel messed up not being on schedule - I will get up earlier. promise~ Hmmm, I don't have a Sam's near me but last time I bought too much and after I cooked it a few days later it didn't taste right. I am going to have to freeze it and reheat or else by it every few days. No condiments allowed right now. Because of my trip she thinks I may not be able to stay on the plan to a tee so I need to be strict right now. I put dill on the fish - try that it is good. You can try Mrs Dash, lemon, pepper, I guess you must be sick to death right now of turkey and fish. Hang in there - you are thisclose baby!!!

AJ - I love that smilie!!! too cute! I missed you I love your new avi - finally a face with the name (you are pretty girl!) Thanks for the well wishes. I am sure everything will come together for me soon enough. Everything in life happens for a reason, and maybe it is all for the best!

Shorty - Nice to see you again hun! I am glad to be back I do have lots to think about and ya know it seems crazy to compete with all this other stuff going on in my life right now but in a way it is my "stability." I hope you decide to compete ~ why wouldn't you? Don't think you need to be perfect your first time out - it is all about you and making progress according to your schedule and your desires. Everything else is just icing on the cake.

Jilly-Willy!!!! I missed you too babe. Wow, Cuba? Takes lots of pictures and have a great time. Finally some sun and nice weather for you and Steve - enjoy it - you both deserve it! Thanks for you words - it really hits home. I am glad things are taking a positive turn for me now. All this drama is too much for me.

Love you all :hugs:

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

shortstuff

I really want to but it seems to be so expensive (even thought I have suits already) plus I am taking 4 classes this summer and I have an internship 3 days a week and I am president of the marketing club at school. man that is a lot huh? Honestly I just feel like after my last time last summer that I would not be able to do it. I don't know and I am so scared my boy will not be supportive and he would rather me finish school. Eeeek i am rambling in your journal but I have really really been wanting to do it. Plus I feel for the amount of time I spend at the gym, doing cardio and everything I should get in that type of shape. Ooops sorry i am done i promise.

Good things come to those who wait........

jstar

Wow Shorty that is alot! You are quite amazing No problem with ranting in my journal - you can wruite whatever you want or as much as you want in here Yeah, it is expensive. I decided to forgo the NY show I was going to do because it would be too much; instead I am just doing some local shows this fall and using all the stuff I already have - the suits, shoes, tanning stuff, makeup, etc. I spent a lot on all that stuff the for the first show but now that I have it all the only thing I have to pay for is the entry fee.

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

JLB001

J...I'm still able to have salt up until Wed. this coming week, so no Mrs. Dash or dill till then! It'll be bad enough having to use it for two days. ick ick ick! I don't mind the turkey and fish, just want a HUGE sirloin! I miss that the most. I love red meat.

Shows do hell to the bank account.

"When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hang on."

jstar

June 3 - Thursday

I worked out late last night and couldn't drag my a** out of bed this morning.
But I will get to bed earlier tonight, it is just hard beacuse my mind was racing last night about all kinds of stuff. Today I feel better though.

I talked to my friend who is a fitness competitor today. I haven't had a chance to connect with her in a while but we made plans to get together for a walk (or in the gym, depending on weather) this Monday. She is stressed from her job and hasn't been able to compete yet this year. We agreed to help eachother out and motivate eachother so we can be ready for the fall.
I am so excited .

Training:

Tonight I do cardio then eat 1/2 apple then do shoulders. No AM cardio today

I keep forgetting to take my green tea caps before cardio - they are optional but I would like to take anything that will give me an extra fat burn! I am also running low on protein powder; she wants me to try EAS precision protein so I may buy that at the Vitamin Shoppe tomorrow. I hate trying new powders because you never know if the stuff is going to taste awful. Since I have tried Myoplex Lite before I guess this stuff won't be too bad. I've gotta go buy some things at the supermarket today too. Be back later

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

atherjen

the EAS precision isn't bad. At least from the reviews we got from ppl at my old job. Some really liked it. Its was pricy though.

Thats so cool that you and your friend are going to kick each others butts!

" To dream anything you want to dream: That is the beauty of the human mind. To do anything you want to do: That is the strength of the human will. To trust yourself to test your limits: that is the courage to succeed."

NPC Southern Classic, June 3rd
NPC Cajun Classic, June 10th
NPC Mississippi State July 22nd

shortstuff

Hey J congrats!!! I am so looking forward to chatting and watching you and cheering you on!!! Hun I am thinking good thoughts for you.

Good things come to those who wait........

jstar

Jen, I am just worried about the taste I've wasted too much $ on powders that taste crappy. I wish I could buy single servings to test them out but no one sells them that way. ---Oh, I am so excited about my girl - she has such a great routine, all disco, Diana Ross (it is too cute!) So you can bet I am going to be pushing her to do a show this fall so she can strut her stuff.

SS - thanks I am excited to follow your journal too. You have so many great goals!

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

jstar

June 4th - Friday

I have a busy day today. I am about to hop on my elliptical for 45 minutes of cardio intervals. ( I remembered to take my green tea ) then I have a job fair at 5pm for Stop and Shop (Supermarkets). Their corporate office is the next city over from mine, about 10 minutes away. I already sent my resume to them a few times over the years but they NEVER call me back. At least this way I can speak to someone face to face.

Then later it's off to the gym for chest/legs and more cardio. This is my 2nd leg day, I do legs all alone on Mondays. Today's leg routine is just single leg presses supersetted with single calf presses; and seated leg curls. It is interesting how she arranged my workouts because they are very specific for my body type and goals. My goals are:

- to lean out the lower body (without adding a lot of size since I have enough there)
- increase my v-taper
-add size to my arms

She had me give her specific goals; as in how many inches do I want to lose/gain and from where:

- chest 35" - fine
- waist 31" ---goal is to lose 6"
- hips 39.5" ---goal is to lose 4.5"
- thighs 22.5" ---goal is to lose 1-2" (just whatever fat is there; keep the muscle)
---biceps 10.75" ---gain 1.5" --long term goal

EDIT:

Meals - I missed one darn it - fish/veggies. (My 2nd to last meal) because my timing was screwed up for the day again. I got back from the gym at 9, had my shake, then later some eggwhites. It's hard eating fish at 11pm, I need to seriously make myself get up early!

Workout - AM - did the elliptical intervals like I was supposed to. PM - chest and legs, missed cardio program #1 - will do it today (Saturday)

Other:
The emails I sent to Stacy bounced back so I decided to call her cell and let her know her email box was full. This was the 1st time talking to her on the phone. She is so sweet- cute southern accent. Of course she probably thinks I sound like Boston Rob on Survivor anyways...I told her I couldn't do a pushup so she gave me some tips on how to get better. Instead of doing them all on my knees she said to get in pushup position and lower myself super slow to the floor then collapse. This focuses on the eccentric strength and this is what really makes you stronger over time. I gave these a shot last night and boy I can feel it in my arms and chest today!

Oh, and I have a wedding coming up in a couple weeks so I needed a dress. I have been putting off buying one until the very last minute because I wanted to of course buy it when I am at my leanest right before the wedding. Well, I bought 2 yesterday and I love them both. The best part is that I only spent $25 for the 2 of them. One was $15 and one was only $10! ....Just an FYI to everyone: I love getting a bargain

"I've failed over and over and over again in my life and that is why I succeed." Michael Jordan

shortstuff

I love your goals hun!! I love your gal as she sound just like mine who set up my workout. Lots of reps for legs to add intensity and up fat burning. Well you are awesome and I love chit chatting with you.

Good things come to those who wait........

jstar