GoalGetter

Alright, alright... a few of you have suggested I start a journal on here. I keep one on my computer anyway, so I figure, might as well just cut n paste my workouts and meals into this, and pepper it with the rants, comments, and more rants, with which I pepper everyone else's threads. Though, why anyone would subject themselves to my ramblings is beyond me!

So here goes, a quick reintroduction, I guess:

• Ivy
• 28 years old
• Miami, Florida
• Aesthetic Goals:
  • BF Current: 15% / BR Goal: 12-10% (pretty reasonable, eh?)
  • Weight Current: 109 / Goal: Whatever it comes out to, so long as it's mostly muscle! RAWR!
  • Look good in a bikini (or hell, look good naked!)
• Overall goal -- Make a permanent lifestyle change by
  • Improving and cleaning up my diet
  • Exercising regularly
  • Improving my self-esteem and self-confidence
  • Learning to deal with my body image issues
  • Appreciating the positives in my life
  • Acknowledging the negatives and dealing with them constructively
  • Helping others do the same for all of the aforementioned

While I am impressed by and admire those of you who compete, that's not really a goal of mine. As I mentioned to someone who asked, I'm much to shy for that sort of thing, and just want to be happy with myself, inside and out. I won't say "never" because, as the past few months have proven, it's silly to say. For example, up until July, I'd said, "I'll never eat broccoli. It's disgusting. I'd rather starve." Now I eat broccoli at least twice a day. Exactly. So while I'm not ruling it out, I'm not training with competition in mind.

This whole thing started because I wanted to look good in a bikini -- and believe me I still want that. But it has become something bigger. I already know I will look good in a bikini, so I almost consider that goal achieved. But the overall goal, that takes a lifetime to maintain, and that's what I'm striving for.

I should note: In July, I took a personal trainer certification course and am now certified. That means shit since I'm not really working as a trainer (yet). It something I did for myself. I wanted to "know" what the trainers know. The class was pretty hard, it was two months long, but it wasn't anything I hadn't already read before. And anatomy. Lots and lots of anatomy. Turns out I remember a surprising amount of information I'd considered "useless" back in college when I took Human Biology.

As for what I 'learned" in this PT cert course, I guess just that I paid $400 and sat in a class made it "legit" to me. But nothing teaches me more than putting it all into practice, so I'm doing just that, with myself first.I have learned a lot since I started this little journey, but every day I realize how much more I have yet to learn.

In the future, I plan to help others learn about healthy living, and help them achieve their health and fitness goals. It's become something I'm passionate about. Prior to this I can honestly say that besides just living and waking up in the morning, I had no passion for anything. I envied my friends who knew exactly what they wanted to do with their lives. I wanted to have a hobby or a pastime I felt strongly about. Something that made me tick.

I've dabbled in fitness here and there - martial arts, running groups, aerobics classes, gymnastics, ballroom dancing (yes, it can be a hell of a workout). Bah, I was even a cheerleader in high school (shhh. Don't tell anyone hahaha!). But it was always just something I did because I had spare time or wanted to try but never stuck to.

"Who has time for that stuff... I have to work, and Scrubs is on. And the Law & Order marathon, and hey let's order pizza..."
You know, life happens. Well, no more. I happen now.

Var

Good luck GoalGetter!

But when you disarm them, you at once offend them by showing that you distrust them, either for cowardice or for want of loyalty, and either of these opinions breeds hatred against you.

-N. Machiavelli

BabsieGirl

Good luck Ivy!!!

We'll be cheering you on. Are you going to share your meals?

Don't hate the player, hate the game!http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/...the%20wave.GIF
Before you talk about what you want - appreciate what you have.

http://home.earthlink.net/~gwcaton/s...ctures/tmf.jpg
A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. -Honore de Balzac
Desire+Consistency='s RESULTS

dg806

Already there! (At least from what I can tell!)

www.sbmuscle.com

Sapphire

Best of luck to you Goalgetter!!

Sapphire
"Thank goodness that perfection is something I will never reach, which will keep me striving till the day I die" ...... GOPRO
http://www.ironmagazineforums.com/at...chmentid=17570
http://www.ironmagazineforums.com/at...chmentid=17638http://www.ironmagazineforums.com/at...chmentid=17567http://www.ironmagazineforums.com/at...chmentid=17622

dianas05

I'm glad you decided to start your own journal. Your goals are definitely achieveable, so you have nothing to worry about! All the best!

~*Diana*~

"The greatest pleasure in life is in doing what people say you cannot do." Walther Bageholt

GoalGetter

BabsieGirl asked in one of my gallery photos, what inspired me to start down this road...

The short and generic answer is "i wanted to look good in a bikini." Which isn't a lie. I do. But that's what I say because I don't really feel like getting into a conversation about it with everyone who asks. Most people who ask don't REALLY care... So the bikini answer makes sense and satisfies and I'm off the hook from a long-winded, one-sided conversation.

Here's the truth. What inspired me. Or rather, who.

I'd rather start way back...

I was never exactly in GREAT shape. Even as a kid, I was the chunky one in a group. Looking back, I can honestly say that my body image issues stem from childhood because to the adult me, the child and then teen me don't look chunky. However my two best friends were bony girls. Next to them, I felt like a cow. And like every teenaged girl, I compared myself to everyone and thought I was fatter and uglier than everyone.

I carried this issue with me through middle school, high school, and college. It didn't stop me from participating in dance groups, cheerleading, tae kwon do, and all sorts of things. I just felt horrible in silence.

I've never had an eating disorder like anorexia or bulimia, because I can't bring myself to not eat, and even worse, to throw up. I love food. I love to eat. The worst that has happened is that I eat way too much and then feel horrible about myself. Think I'm a failure, the whole bit. But I've never ever starved or vomited as a means to be thin.

Anyway, back on topic...

So I wasn't really fat back then, but felt that I was. I worked out sporadically in college because the university had a phenomenal new wellness center. But i was too busy juggling two jobs, a full courseload and the pressure of maintaining a scholarship. Oh and a social life that involved mainly getting drunk and eating crap food late at night, every night. I'm surprised to this day that I managed to carry on that lifestyle for four and a half years.

Needless to say, in 1998, I emerged from college a bit overweight, with high cholesterol, and more bad habits than anyone should ever be exposed to. And on to the workforce. Dot com. Need I say more? I worked sometimes 18 hours a day on whatever start-up hired me that month. Moved in with a boyfriend, bought a house, gained more weight. Still exercised sporadically, but nothing that could ever significantly change my physique since I was constantly eating so unhealthily.

2003 - single again, as is my best friend from childhood (one of the skinny girls, who is still surprisingly skinny). We go out to a salsa night club where we used to hang out years before. I think I'm looking mighty fine in my halter top and tight pants. I hadn't felt better about myself in ages, actually. I honestly, sincerely was one of those girls you see out and about, with rolls, wearing clothes that she clearly should not be wearing. I was oblivious and happy.

My best friend and I joked about running into the old lady who used to coach our dance group in high school. She used to come to this night club, too. Would you believe it? On our way out we run into her! And what does she do? She stares straight at my stomach and says, "oh my god! You've gotten so fat!" Just like that. And to my best friend? "Oh, you're as beautiful and petite as ever! How well you've maintained yourself!" Of course, I was crushed. I'm only human.

But it doesn't stop there. This rude bitch starts telling me how she is -- get this -- putting me on a diet and that I'm losing five pounds by Monday. That's um... two days from now, lady! She was relentless. I couldn't believe she was saying these things to me. And then the kicker. Here's the inspiration:

She put her hand on my shoulder, stared at my stomach -- my rolls -- and said, "Oh but you have kids, right?"

By the time I got to my car, I was in tears, totally inconsolable. My best friend didn't know what to do or what to say. She was almost crying, too.

That night, I sat up in bed, crying and feeling miserable and the Winsor Pilates informercial was on. Inspired, I ordered it, rush delivery. Had it in two days. Did the whole ten week program, and lost 25 pounds and 4% body fat. I'd started at 26% and had the foresight to get that measured by a friend before starting. By May, I was at 22%. During this time, my eating was not completely clean, but I did cut back on a lot of the junk I'd been eating, and started finding healthier alternatives. I was still reluctant to eat vegetables, and was still using "lack of time" as an excuse for doing a better job of cleaning up my diet and taking exercise seriously.

This summer, bored with pilates, i took up weight training. Bought some books about body sculpting, and body building for women, etc., and started paying closer attention to my diet, by keeping a journal and asking questions wherever I went to eat. At the end of May I signed up for that PT certification class, and at the end of July, I started this training program with a trainer who I'd originally approached about a job. Realizing I had a lot to learn, I instead offered him a barter - graphic design services for personal training. I committed to him and said, "Tell me what to do. I'll do it. Teach me. I'll learn it."

That was exactly 49 days ago. And here I am today. I haven't missed a single training session or cardio workout. I'm eating vegetables every day. I made myself tolerate them, to the point that I now like them in earnest. In 49 days, I have faltered twice on my diet. Once with the whole Slim-a-Bear fiasco, which I mentioned in someone's thread, and once this past weekend, with a pint of Tasti D'Lite, which I'm trying to convince myself wasn't as harmful as if it'd been a pint of Ben and Jerry's.

Still. Not bad for a girl who used to have McDonald's for breakfast, Wendy's for lunch, and Taco Bell for dinner, with several trips to the vending machine and the boss' candy bowl throughout the day. I can't imagine going back to my old ways. It feels like a lifetime ago.

And it's all really thanks to that rude old lady. That was the day I learned to take a negative and turn it into a positive.

GoalGetter

Var - Thanks!

BabsieGirl - Yes I will post my meals - probably at night before I go to bed, since that's when I wrap up my daily journal thing on my computer

dg806 - hey now!

Sapphire - Thank you!

DianaS05 - I'm glad to have found this forum. You folks on here are true gems. I couldn't be more grateful to have stumbled upon this site when I did!

ponyboy

Wow. Awesome story. I'm sure with that you will be able to inspire people - keep your before and after photos, there are a lot of people that would love to hear that and know that they can come out of the other side of a bad situation with a little hard work and resolve.

Thanks for sharing with us.

Today I can do what others will not so that tomorrow I will do what others cannot.

The difference between winners and losers is that winners do things that losers don't want to do.

Jill

Glad you decided to start a journal here. Good luck!

GoalGetter

Glad you suggested it! Thank you!

chiquita6683

now thats the correct way to start a journal! u did such a good job of explaining your emotions and struggles. i saw all of your pictures and wish you the best of luck, you look awesome! i can tell that your serious and determined! remember to have patience though.

dg806

What
Seriously, you should be proud. You have accomplished alot already!

www.sbmuscle.com

GoalGetter

Thanks chiquitica!

Patience is a struggle every day of my life, but I'm hanging in there. Thanks for the encouragement!

GoalGetter

haha! I was playin' with ya...

GoalGetter

... is it obvious that I am totally slacking at work today?

Saturday Fever

I want to marry you, but I'm afraid of hurricanes.

yay.

fantasma62

Hey my GG, great to see you here.....

This, I assure you, is the best thing that you could have done...

Are you ready for Jeanne?

I mean, you have to laugh about that right?

Good luck with your goals, you'll do well

-Tony-

HIHT: High Intensity Hybrid Training

pmech

Lol SF

Ad to you GG, good luck with your goals, you have the motivation to get there and beyond.

And next time you see the mean old lady give, her the finger from everyone of us.

GoalGetter

JEANNE? Who's JEANNE -- wait a minute, wait wait wait - please don't tell me there is another farking hurricane. I'm hopping on the next plane WEST. I swear. Like tomorrow. haha!

GoalGetter

The finger? I'll buy that hag a palace. She did me a favor, that bitch! haha!

GoalGetter

But wait! I'm not a hurricane!

Well, actually, hell yeah. I am. GO 'CANES! Haha!

Thanks, SF

Saturday Fever

I live in hurricane-free California! *hint*

note: nevermind the earthquakes!

yay.

hikerchick

Hi goalgetter

I just looked at your gallery and read your journal. You're already kicking butt! I can't believe how far you've come since your July pictures. You should be plenty proud of yourself. and good for you for eating your veggies I'm still working on that

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is just a habit.
- Socrates


I am worth it!

GoalGetter

Hikerchick! Thanks for saying hi! And thanks for the compliments/encouragement!

Veggies - just pinch your nose, chew, swallow, chug water... eventually you won't have to chug water, and after some more time, you won't have to pinch your nose. And after some more time, you'll actually enjoy eating them. CRAZY.

Haha! I still can't do asparagus, though.