MonStar's Journal

M.J.H. · 12-05-2004, 07:49 PM

KEEPING THIS ONE!!

I know I have created probably over a billion journals here at IM, and I really can't stand that fact. But honestly---I am realizing now that that pattern is obviously getting me absolutely nowhere. Anymore I feel like I have gotten completely out of shape. I feel flabbier and softer than I ever have in my life, and I feel like I need to completely turn everything around.

I need to just stick it out with one journal, and just keep my diet clean for the most part and stop f*cking around with this immature, OCD bullsh*t. I am the only one who puts the food in my mouth. So I am the one that is going to have to stay in control, no matter what it takes.

Please, please, please keep comments positive. That's all.

Cold Iron · 12-05-2004, 08:01 PM

GL Mike !!

This one has promise..

M.J.H. · 12-05-2004, 08:06 PM

Arnie's left nu: Thanks bud, I hope so!

M.J.H. · 12-05-2004, 08:06 PM

Sunday; 12-5-2004

Training:

T-Bar Rows
2 sets of 9 with 270
3 sets of 3 with 360

Nautilus Pullovers
5 sets of 5 with 280

BTN Cable Pulldowns
3 sets of 10 with 180

Bentover DB Lateral Raises
2 sets of 12 with the 35's

Pretty good workout today I think, I honestly really think that I have to get back into shape! As much as I hate to say that, it's how I feel at this point. After my first exercise I am out of breath almost and ready to leave the gym. I just have been binging so much lately, and haven't been hitting the gym hard at all.

BTW, today at the gym I weighed 233 lbs. I am aiming for around 220ish.

Diet:

Meal 1: 1% cottage cheese + mixed fruit
Meal 2: 2 chicken breasts, cheese tortelini
Meal 3: 1/2 turkey & cheese sandwich
Meal 4: 1/2 turkey & cheese sandwich
Preworkout: 1 scoop of Swole
Postworkout: whey protein + 1% milk
Meal 6: tuna salad sandwich, mixed fruit
Meal 7: garden salad + vinegarette dressing, chicken salad melt
Meal 8: peanut butter

Sleep: 7 hours.

soxmuscle · 12-05-2004, 08:44 PM

Use the negative posts as motivation. With that being said:

Personally, I don't think anythings changed from your journals in which you started binging to now. Nothing. You'll continue to binge, you'll continue to create new journals, and you'll continue to fail.

No one believes you can do it.

/end of act.

Now use that shit as motivation, man.

Rocco32 · 12-05-2004, 09:54 PM

Mike, good luck man. I was reading articles in T-Nation and this part of an article made me think of you-

Quote:

Lesson #8: Have 10% Foods

It’s unfortunate that most trainees expect perfection from themselves. Perhaps it’s because in athletics we’re told stories of certain individuals giving 110%. As the great coach John Wooden says, "You can only give what you have and you only have 100%. No one is an overachiever. We’re all underachievers to a different extent. I prefer to judge individuals on how close they come to 100%, knowing that no one can ever achieve perfection…"

If some trainees miss a single meal or eat one food not on their plan (regardless of the circumstances surrounding these less-than-perfect decisions), their failure to achieve that impossible 110% effort sets in motion a psychological chain of events that leads to frustration and the inability to get right back on the plan. It’s as if once a single sub-optimal decision is made, the all-or-nothing mentality sets in and BAM, they’re back to nothing.

But here’s the rub. It doesn’t have to be this way. In my 14 years as an athlete, weightlifter and coach, I’ve come to realize that 100% nutritional discipline is never required for optimal progress. The difference, in results, between 90% adherence to your nutrition program and 100% adherence is negligible.

So allow yourself the extra 10% wiggle room. Do you like frappuccinos at Starbucks? If so, have some during your 10% allotment. (Also, if you’re a man and admit to liking frappuccinos, either get off the Clomid or take some TRIBEX immediately!) My favorite 10% food is pizza. Once or twice a week I allow myself to have some.

This 10% wiggle room will allow you the freedom to eat a few extra things not on your menu without the guilt and subsequent psychological crash that usually accompanies such perceived transgressions.

Hope that helps you some.

sara · 12-05-2004, 10:17 PM

I believe in you Mike! I know you can keep this journal

Look at me, binging, changing diets everyday

but Im still keeping the same journal till the end of this year and 2005 comes hopefuly I will be following 1 solid plan with a new journal
Just keep up the good work and enjoy bodybuilding

sara · 12-05-2004, 10:21 PM

Ok.. this post is to everyone (including me) Especially ME!!!! I think some of us here not enjoying bodybuilding.. we having binging problems that is affecting our everyday life.. we need to enjoy bodybuilding.. remember this is our hobby.. its not a punishment
its also a challange, but we gotta enjoy this challange

**CowPimp** · 12-05-2004, 10:39 PM

Just remember one thing:

There is no reason to binge.

Every time you debate in your head whether or not to binge, as I suspect you do, consistently tell yourself there is no reason to do so. Smack yourself if you feel it's necessary.

soxmuscle · 12-05-2004, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sara

Ok.. this post is to everyone (including me) Especially ME!!!! I think some of us here not enjoying bodybuilding.. we having binging problems that is affecting our everyday life.. we need to enjoy bodybuilding.. remember this is our hobby.. its not a punishment
its also a challange, but we gotta enjoy this challange

maybe the reason why you and Monstar are having such trouble with binging is because your thinking of bodybuilding as just a "hobby." I view it as a lifestyle, and work my entire day around hitting the gym, around eating at specific times, etc.

soxmuscle · 12-05-2004, 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CowPimp

Just remember one thing:

There is no reason to binge.

Every time you debate in your head whether or not to binge, as I suspect you do, consistently tell yourself there is no reason to do so. Smack yourself if you feel it's necessary.

Great idea. I go to McDonalds with my freinds from time to time, and I sit there watching them stuff there faces with big macs and cheeseburgers, and fries, and crap like that.. is it tempting? sure, but all I tell myself is that its not worth it, and its not really that good.. or if I get close to eating one I'll smack myself as CP said.

It's definitly something that can be overcome, oh wait.. you can never overcome it, ever!!

sara · 12-05-2004, 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by soxmuscle

It's definitly something that can be overcome, oh wait.. you can never overcome it, ever!!

What you mean by that?

sara · 12-05-2004, 11:15 PM

soxmuscle- I am seeing the gym as a hobby that it needs to be accomplished almost everyday! but my eating plan was a lifestyle to me.. no, sorry.. It still is a lifestyle for me, because tomorrow is a new day and I miss my lifestyle

I dont want to mess Mike's journal
sorry mike

soxmuscle · 12-05-2004, 11:18 PM

In my original post, I suggested using the negative comments as motivation.

soxmuscle · 12-05-2004, 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sara

soxmuscle- I am seeing the gym as a hobby that it needs to be accomplished almost everyday! but my eating plan was a lifestyle to me.. no, sorry.. It still is a lifestyle for me, because tomorrow is a new day and I miss my lifestyle

I dont want to mess Mike's journal
sorry mike

Awesome, I understand.

sara · 12-05-2004, 11:20 PM

I see

**Jodi** · 12-05-2004, 11:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by soxmuscle

maybe the reason why you and Monstar are having such trouble with binging is because your thinking of bodybuilding as just a "hobby." I view it as a lifestyle, and work my entire day around hitting the gym, around eating at specific times, etc.

Precisely!

Enjoying food in moderation and learning that Bodybuilding and your healthy diet is a lifestyle. The gym should be just as important as your eating habits and when you learn that you will be able to control your lifestyle. I make sure that I eat some of those yummy things every now and then but right after that it's back to my regular lifestyle of healthy food and BB.

sportytahoe · 12-05-2004, 11:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MonStar

I need to just stick it out with one journal, and just keep my diet clean for the most part and stop f*cking around with this immature, OCD bullsh*t. I am the only one who puts the food in my mouth. So I am the one that is going to have to stay in control, no matter what it takes.

i feel your pain...nothing tastes as good as looking good feels--keep up the good work!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm Trying · 12-06-2004, 12:45 AM

I'm keeping you to this one Mike

**CowPimp** · 12-06-2004, 12:57 AM

Oh yeah, and Mike, please keep this journal and post any binges. I believe we can help you overcome the binging if you tell us about it.

**Mudge** · 12-06-2004, 01:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CowPimp

Oh yeah, and Mike, please keep this journal and post any binges. I believe we can help you overcome the binging if you tell us about it.

I stick to things better if I am held accountable

Good luck Mike

M.J.H. · 12-06-2004, 10:15 AM

soxmuscle: Hey man, maybe I will try and use negative motivation this time around, whatever works! At this point I am just completely frustrated with how things I have gotten. I usually don't let them slip this much. I am at the point now where I am flabbier than ever before, I feel like I am more out of shape than ever before, etc. I have been binging almost on a daily basis, it's just gotten out of control. But I am not going to sit here and feel f*cking sorry for myself, that's ridiculous. I need to wake up and do something about it, period.

rock: That's the truth bud, thanks for that quote. Because that's how I should see it. As long as the majority of my diet is clean there's nothing wrong with slipping up here and there.

sara: Hey sara, thanks for stopping by, appreciate the support and kind words. I do need to start thinking of this as a lifestyle. Because when I think of it as a hobby I tell myself for whatever reason that when I am not keeping a journal---the calories I am eating don't count. I know it sounds stupid but if I am not logging what I am eating into a journal then it doesn't really happen. It sounds so stupid but I go into this retarded mindset when I start binging all the time. I have no idea why. I guess just an OCD mindset.

CowPimp: Great, great point there man. There is absolutely no reason to binge. I mean no matter what I am not going to feel good afterwards. It's a temporary fix in a lot of ways. When I start binging I feel good for a little while, and then as I start to fill up I and feel sick I realize how stupid what I just did, was. I just need to break the habit. I am going to start reading more in my book on BED (Binge Eating Disorder).

Jodi: Good point, I really need to start putting more emphasis on my eating outside of the gym. I don't have a problem going to the gym on a regular basis, but for whatever reason I have trouble sticking to the bodybuilding lifestyle when I am outside the gym. I really need to focus on hitting the gym regularly as well---I can't get over how out of shape I am feeling! After an exercise or two I am ready to quit, I am out of breath!

sportytahoe: Thanks bud, exactly, nothing tastes as good as looking good feels. Perfect quote.

I'm Trying: Thank you for the support.

Mudge: I am going to just post my binges and sh*t in here if they happen, period. I need to get in control of this. I am sick of feeling so pathetic and out of control.

M.J.H. · 12-06-2004, 11:42 AM

Monday; 12-6-2004

Training:

Decline BB Presses
2 sets of 8 with 275
3 sets of 3 with 335

Flat DB Presses
4 sets of 5 with the 120's

Nautilus Pec-Deck Flyes
2 sets of 12 with 180
2 sets of 5 with 240

Diet:

Preworkout: 1 scoop of Swole
Postworkout: whey protein + 1% milk
Meal 2: turkey & cheese sandwich
Meal 3: 4 parmesan breaded chicken breasts
Meal 4: 2 baked chicken breasts, rice
Meal 5: 2% cottage cheese + peaches
Meal 6: 2 low-fat stuffed chicken breasts
Meal 7: peanut butter

Resisted the urge to binge tonight! I was at the grocery store with my girlfriend and I wanted to binge so damn bad. And just start a new journal tomorrow. But for whatever reason what CowPimp said yesterday popped in my head, "I don't have to binge."

Sleep: 7 hours.

M.J.H. · 12-07-2004, 02:59 PM

Tuesday; 12-7-2004

Training:

Skullcrushers
5 sets of 5 with 105

CG Preacher Curls
5 sets of 5 with 95

One-Arm DB French Presses
4 sets of 8 with the 40's

Seated Hammer Curls
4 sets of 8 with the 40's

Diet:

Meal 1: MRP + 2% milk
Meal 2: tuna salad sandwich, mixed fruit
Preworkout: 1 scoop of Swole
Postworkout: whey protein + 2% milk
Meal 4: baked chicken, sweet potato
Meal 5: egg salad sandwich
Meal 6: 2% cottage cheese + pineapple
Meal 7: 2 low-fat stuffed chicken breasts

Sleep: 6 hours.

12-05-2004, 07:49 PM	#1
M.J.H. Obsessed Elite Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Delaware Posts: 3,587 Photos: 12	MonStar's Journal KEEPING THIS ONE!! I know I have created probably over a billion journals here at IM, and I really can't stand that fact. But honestly---I am realizing now that that pattern is obviously getting me absolutely nowhere. Anymore I feel like I have gotten completely out of shape. I feel flabbier and softer than I ever have in my life, and I feel like I need to completely turn everything around. I need to just stick it out with one journal, and just keep my diet clean for the most part and stop fcking around with this immature, OCD bullsht. I am the only one who puts the food in my mouth. So I am the one that is going to have to stay in control, no matter what it takes. Please, please, please keep comments positive. That's all.
	Stats! 23 years old, 5'11.5", 206 lbs., ~8% bodyfat 380/455/655 bench/squat/deadlift (current) 405/495/675 bench/squat/deadlift (goals) The M.J.H. Chronicles

12-05-2004, 08:06 PM	#3
M.J.H. Obsessed Elite Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Delaware Posts: 3,587 Photos: 12	Arnie's left nu: Thanks bud, I hope so!
	Stats! 23 years old, 5'11.5", 206 lbs., ~8% bodyfat 380/455/655 bench/squat/deadlift (current) 405/495/675 bench/squat/deadlift (goals) The M.J.H. Chronicles

12-05-2004, 08:06 PM	#4
M.J.H. Obsessed Elite Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Delaware Posts: 3,587 Photos: 12	Sunday; 12-5-2004 Training: T-Bar Rows 2 sets of 9 with 270 3 sets of 3 with 360 Nautilus Pullovers 5 sets of 5 with 280 BTN Cable Pulldowns 3 sets of 10 with 180 Bentover DB Lateral Raises 2 sets of 12 with the 35's Pretty good workout today I think, I honestly really think that I have to get back into shape! As much as I hate to say that, it's how I feel at this point. After my first exercise I am out of breath almost and ready to leave the gym. I just have been binging so much lately, and haven't been hitting the gym hard at all. BTW, today at the gym I weighed 233 lbs. I am aiming for around 220ish. Diet: Meal 1: 1% cottage cheese + mixed fruit Meal 2: 2 chicken breasts, cheese tortelini Meal 3: 1/2 turkey & cheese sandwich Meal 4: 1/2 turkey & cheese sandwich Preworkout: 1 scoop of Swole Postworkout: whey protein + 1% milk Meal 6: tuna salad sandwich, mixed fruit Meal 7: garden salad + vinegarette dressing, chicken salad melt Meal 8: peanut butter Sleep: 7 hours. Last edited by M.J.H. : 12-06-2004 at 02:43 AM.
	Stats! 23 years old, 5'11.5", 206 lbs., ~8% bodyfat 380/455/655 bench/squat/deadlift (current) 405/495/675 bench/squat/deadlift (goals) The M.J.H. Chronicles

12-05-2004, 08:44 PM	#5
soxmuscle do work son Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: I will eat your face Posts: 8,548 Photos: 10	Use the negative posts as motivation. With that being said: Personally, I don't think anythings changed from your journals in which you started binging to now. Nothing. You'll continue to binge, you'll continue to create new journals, and you'll continue to fail. No one believes you can do it. /end of act. Now use that shit as motivation, man.
	Age: 20 \| Height: 5'7" \| Weight: 150 lbs \| Penis: 12 inches

12-05-2004, 10:17 PM	#7
sara cRaZy!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Earth Posts: 6,304 Photos: 2	I believe in you Mike! I know you can keep this journal Look at me, binging, changing diets everyday but Im still keeping the same journal till the end of this year and 2005 comes hopefuly I will be following 1 solid plan with a new journal Just keep up the good work and enjoy bodybuilding
	www.metzgerbodies.net www.myspace.com/smbdybldr

12-05-2004, 08:01 PM	#2
Cold Iron High $ociety Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: ONtario Posts: 1,615	GL Mike !! This one has promise..

12-05-2004, 10:21 PM	#8
sara cRaZy!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Earth Posts: 6,304 Photos: 2	Ok.. this post is to everyone (including me) Especially ME!!!! I think some of us here not enjoying bodybuilding.. we having binging problems that is affecting our everyday life.. we need to enjoy bodybuilding.. remember this is our hobby.. its not a punishment its also a challange, but we gotta enjoy this challange
	www.metzgerbodies.net www.myspace.com/smbdybldr

12-05-2004, 10:39 PM	#9
CowPimp Fueled by Testosterone Moderator Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Silver Spring, MD Posts: 15,428	Just remember one thing: There is no reason to binge. Every time you debate in your head whether or not to binge, as I suspect you do, consistently tell yourself there is no reason to do so. Smack yourself if you feel it's necessary.
	The only time it's bad to feel the burn is when you're peeing... CowPimp Picks Up Heavy Shit MySpace YouTube Videos

12-05-2004, 11:15 PM	#13
sara cRaZy!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Earth Posts: 6,304 Photos: 2	soxmuscle- I am seeing the gym as a hobby that it needs to be accomplished almost everyday! but my eating plan was a lifestyle to me.. no, sorry.. It still is a lifestyle for me, because tomorrow is a new day and I miss my lifestyle I dont want to mess Mike's journal sorry mike
	www.metzgerbodies.net www.myspace.com/smbdybldr

12-05-2004, 11:18 PM	#14
soxmuscle do work son Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: I will eat your face Posts: 8,548 Photos: 10	In my original post, I suggested using the negative comments as motivation.
	Age: 20 \| Height: 5'7" \| Weight: 150 lbs \| Penis: 12 inches

12-05-2004, 11:20 PM	#16
sara cRaZy!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Earth Posts: 6,304 Photos: 2	I see
	www.metzgerbodies.net www.myspace.com/smbdybldr

12-06-2004, 12:45 AM	#19
I'm Trying Senior Member Elite Member Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 1,574	I'm keeping you to this one Mike
	The beatings will continue until morale improves!! Personal Goal: I WILL be playing "C" tournament ball next year!!! Training Moderator @softballfans My New Journal!!!! Age: 29 \| Height: 5'11.5" \| Weight: 198 lbs BF% ? Bests: Bench:? \| Squat: ? \| Deads: ? Goals: Bench: 235 \| Squat: 250 \| Deadlift: 300

12-06-2004, 12:57 AM	#20
CowPimp Fueled by Testosterone Moderator Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Silver Spring, MD Posts: 15,428	Oh yeah, and Mike, please keep this journal and post any binges. I believe we can help you overcome the binging if you tell us about it.
	The only time it's bad to feel the burn is when you're peeing... CowPimp Picks Up Heavy Shit MySpace YouTube Videos

12-06-2004, 10:15 AM	#22
M.J.H. Obsessed Elite Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Delaware Posts: 3,587 Photos: 12	soxmuscle: Hey man, maybe I will try and use negative motivation this time around, whatever works! At this point I am just completely frustrated with how things I have gotten. I usually don't let them slip this much. I am at the point now where I am flabbier than ever before, I feel like I am more out of shape than ever before, etc. I have been binging almost on a daily basis, it's just gotten out of control. But I am not going to sit here and feel fcking sorry for myself, that's ridiculous. I need to wake up and do something about it, period. rock:* That's the truth bud, thanks for that quote. Because that's how I should see it. As long as the majority of my diet is clean there's nothing wrong with slipping up here and there. sara: Hey sara, thanks for stopping by, appreciate the support and kind words. I do need to start thinking of this as a lifestyle. Because when I think of it as a hobby I tell myself for whatever reason that when I am not keeping a journal---the calories I am eating don't count. I know it sounds stupid but if I am not logging what I am eating into a journal then it doesn't really happen. It sounds so stupid but I go into this retarded mindset when I start binging all the time. I have no idea why. I guess just an OCD mindset. CowPimp: Great, great point there man. There is absolutely no reason to binge. I mean no matter what I am not going to feel good afterwards. It's a temporary fix in a lot of ways. When I start binging I feel good for a little while, and then as I start to fill up I and feel sick I realize how stupid what I just did, was. I just need to break the habit. I am going to start reading more in my book on BED (Binge Eating Disorder). Jodi: Good point, I really need to start putting more emphasis on my eating outside of the gym. I don't have a problem going to the gym on a regular basis, but for whatever reason I have trouble sticking to the bodybuilding lifestyle when I am outside the gym. I really need to focus on hitting the gym regularly as well---I can't get over how out of shape I am feeling! After an exercise or two I am ready to quit, I am out of breath! sportytahoe: Thanks bud, exactly, nothing tastes as good as looking good feels. Perfect quote. I'm Trying: Thank you for the support. Mudge: I am going to just post my binges and sh*t in here if they happen, period. I need to get in control of this. I am sick of feeling so pathetic and out of control.
	Stats! 23 years old, 5'11.5", 206 lbs., ~8% bodyfat 380/455/655 bench/squat/deadlift (current) 405/495/675 bench/squat/deadlift (goals) The M.J.H. Chronicles

12-06-2004, 11:42 AM	#23
M.J.H. Obsessed Elite Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Delaware Posts: 3,587 Photos: 12	Monday; 12-6-2004 Training: Decline BB Presses 2 sets of 8 with 275 3 sets of 3 with 335 Flat DB Presses 4 sets of 5 with the 120's Nautilus Pec-Deck Flyes 2 sets of 12 with 180 2 sets of 5 with 240 Diet: Preworkout: 1 scoop of Swole Postworkout: whey protein + 1% milk Meal 2: turkey & cheese sandwich Meal 3: 4 parmesan breaded chicken breasts Meal 4: 2 baked chicken breasts, rice Meal 5: 2% cottage cheese + peaches Meal 6: 2 low-fat stuffed chicken breasts Meal 7: peanut butter Resisted the urge to binge tonight! I was at the grocery store with my girlfriend and I wanted to binge so damn bad. And just start a new journal tomorrow. But for whatever reason what CowPimp said yesterday popped in my head, "I don't have to binge." Sleep: 7 hours. Last edited by M.J.H. : 12-07-2004 at 02:42 AM.
	Stats! 23 years old, 5'11.5", 206 lbs., ~8% bodyfat 380/455/655 bench/squat/deadlift (current) 405/495/675 bench/squat/deadlift (goals) The M.J.H. Chronicles

12-07-2004, 02:59 PM	#24
M.J.H. Obsessed Elite Member Join Date: Jun 2001 Location: Delaware Posts: 3,587 Photos: 12	Tuesday; 12-7-2004 Training: Skullcrushers 5 sets of 5 with 105 CG Preacher Curls 5 sets of 5 with 95 One-Arm DB French Presses 4 sets of 8 with the 40's Seated Hammer Curls 4 sets of 8 with the 40's Diet: Meal 1: MRP + 2% milk Meal 2: tuna salad sandwich, mixed fruit Preworkout: 1 scoop of Swole Postworkout: whey protein + 2% milk Meal 4: baked chicken, sweet potato Meal 5: egg salad sandwich Meal 6: 2% cottage cheese + pineapple Meal 7: 2 low-fat stuffed chicken breasts Sleep: 6 hours. Last edited by M.J.H. : 12-08-2004 at 03:06 AM.
	Stats! 23 years old, 5'11.5", 206 lbs., ~8% bodyfat 380/455/655 bench/squat/deadlift (current) 405/495/675 bench/squat/deadlift (goals) The M.J.H. Chronicles

12-07-2004, 03:22 PM	#25
Luke9583 Lucky Luke Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: idaho Posts: 5,379 P