Thread: Crop dusting story

thats fkin mint

fuck it was one hell of a shit

Man you gotta learn to snap the trail off with a hip whipping action...
One time in a bookstore I felt my boiler rumbling, I strolled along looking for an empty aisle, found one in the Autobiography section so I hurriedly walked into it and looked through the books and found one to pretend being interested in. I planted one foot and worked the other foot all the way up to my cheek to get less restriction and let out the pressure relief valve, foosh.....but god damn it to hell a nice looking asian girl comes and blocks off my back door exit away from the lounge area at the other end so I have to plan a new exit strategy and quick. Knowing full well these silent guys linger due to lack of propellant, aormed a weak bond with your gas saturated fabric, this thing will trail behind you for a good while until it dissipates or you sit down and snap it off....I have neither option, and soon little miss asia hottie pants is going to head this way when she remembers she also wanted to pick up a Barack Obama biographnd then seep out in a wicking fashion through the layers of fabric, I dropped my book and squatted to force most of the gas pocket out, now there is just the little tail that is the more dense particles that have fy and I am by the O's....what did I do, after squatting I stood and walked straight toward her, got to about the mid-T's and made the palm to forehead D'oh just remembered something and made a sharp about face making sure to give my hips a radical twist thus flinging the trail along the path of inertia like the cracking of a whip....I had an instant thought in my head, a scenario where if by some special camera you could see this go down you would have seen this tail snap off and streak towards the asian girls nose, but it has a certain elasticity under acceleration so it just hits it's stretch limit right as it gets under her nostrils, kind of flutters like a new years party favor and then snaps back on itself leaving a faint residual stain on her upper lip, not too much, just enough that for the next 10 minutes each time she sips her latte mocha chino vente coffee coffee she'll swear it tastes slightly like shit, or when she scratches her nose she'll try to remember when she scratched her bare asshole, was it in the car, on the elevator, maybe the dressing room..WHEN? After breaking free of my trail of embarrassment, I rushed around to the next aisle to listen to people walk through my now marked territory and make comments about someone farting or busting ass, or best yet "That old man reading the Nixon book....I think he shit himself..."

Originally Posted by maniclion

Man you gotta learn to snap the trail off with a hip whipping action...
One time in a bookstore I felt my boiler rumbling, I strolled along looking for an empty aisle, found one in the Autobiography section so I hurriedly walked into it and looked through the books and found one to pretend being interested in. I planted one foot and worked the other foot all the way up to my cheek to get less restriction and let out the pressure relief valve, foosh.....but god damn it to hell a nice looking asian girl comes and blocks off my back door exit away from the lounge area at the other end so I have to plan a new exit strategy and quick. Knowing full well these silent guys linger due to lack of propellant, aormed a weak bond with your gas saturated fabric, this thing will trail behind you for a good while until it dissipates or you sit down and snap it off....I have neither option, and soon little miss asia hottie pants is going to head this way when she remembers she also wanted to pick up a Barack Obama biographnd then seep out in a wicking fashion through the layers of fabric, I dropped my book and squatted to force most of the gas pocket out, now there is just the little tail that is the more dense particles that have fy and I am by the O's....what did I do, after squatting I stood and walked straight toward her, got to about the mid-T's and made the palm to forehead D'oh just remembered something and made a sharp about face making sure to give my hips a radical twist thus flinging the trail along the path of inertia like the cracking of a whip....I had an instant thought in my head, a scenario where if by some special camera you could see this go down you would have seen this tail snap off and streak towards the asian girls nose, but it has a certain elasticity under acceleration so it just hits it's stretch limit right as it gets under her nostrils, kind of flutters like a new years party favor and then snaps back on itself leaving a faint residual stain on her upper lip, not too much, just enough that for the next 10 minutes each time she sips her latte mocha chino vente coffee coffee she'll swear it tastes slightly like shit, or when she scratches her nose she'll try to remember when she scratched her bare asshole, was it in the car, on the elevator, maybe the dressing room..WHEN? After breaking free of my trail of embarrassment, I rushed around to the next aisle to listen to people walk through my now marked territory and make comments about someone farting or busting ass, or best yet "That old man reading the Nixon book....I think he shit himself..."

smooth..
i just didn't have the time.
ass exploded unknown time guy in the next stall.. smell was burnt due to the stank...i wasn't thinking plus the door wasslow to close but it work out great..the other guy took the fall...i like the breakway fart move man

the Situation has DRSE potential . . I must confer with the Party Elite for membership potential . . .

On a side note where is Pony...did his penis self destruct?

I think that nasty Milf bit it off

ha ha

We are all very proud.

Dude, where's the coke story?