Thread: should I stay or should I go?

Originally Posted by maniclion

Why because everything in my life is chaotic? I would give anything to have just grown up in a small town my whole life with the same parents and friends I'd known since pre-school....

Wisdom comes with struggle.

I'd drop her like a bad habit if I were in your shoes. I don't know what state you live in (because what I'm going to mention is impossible in CA), but try to get full or joint custody of the child.

Women tend to make men act in a crazy and irrational manner. I know too many men that are in prison, dead, depressed, homeless, ill, or insane because of some pink flaps of skin between a pair of legs. It would be a bad move for you, her, and the child if you were to simply say "to hell with it" and give her a nice cold-cut across the face. Women know that the law is always on their side even if they are in the wrong. So much for equality.

Case in point: my brother was telling me about something he saw on the bus a couple months back. Some chick is yelling at her dude, calling him everyhting bad in the book. She goes as far as to start smacking him in the back of the head and kicking him as well. He finally gets the courage to start saying something back and she replies saying, "don't make me call your PO on you! All I have to do is say you hit me and you're done!"

I hate to say it like that and I'm sure your relationship is much deeper than that, but there are literally billions of women on God's green earth. I'm sure you can find one that won't leave you with the headaches right now and ulcers from stress down the line. I was once told that if a woman ever makes you feel like you have to shout at/hit her in order for her to listen to you, then you need to find yourself a another woman.

Originally Posted by DiGiTaL

Look at The_Situation's signature. might help.

lmao,thats one way out of a relationship + 500 hours community service

We talked we are gonna give this thing one more shot no bs this time.If things get out of control again I'm gonna pack my stuff and take it elsewere.Thanks 4 all the advice.

Put it this way.. if you are fighting everyday, but stay only because of the kid... your child will grow up as either a retard or criminal. No joke, a kids mind at that age is like a sponge. They will get over a divorce. They wont forget years of bearing witness to two parents fighting 24/7 and being right in the thick of it.

My parents have been through a divorce, I sided with my father @ 12. Many other of my family members have had divorces as well. The kids will get over it i promise you, as long as its for a good reason, and not because you and her are lazy and just dont want to work things out. Divorce has become a "trend" now a days and sadly the concept of marriage i think has dwindled far from what it was 50 yrs ago.

Put it this way, I have a family member currently who has been in a miserable marriage for many years. They have literally sleep in different rooms for over a decade, and the fighting is pretty much a daily occurrence, especially since alcohol is involved. She makes all the money while her lazy ass husband does noting, has no job, and hasn't had one since long before the unemployment problems in this country hit. She only puts up with it all for the two kids. And now,.... the kids are pretty much fucked. They have problems in school, display anti-social tendencies, and have no concept of discipline.

Whats the point?

~Divorce is usually not the answer, but at the same time, keeping a defunct relationship together that could negatively affect the kid(s) isnt either.

Sounds like you are blaming her for everything, but are you really a perfect boyfriend and father? You two shouldn't stay together just for your son.....if there's no feelings between you two than split, but if you love her and she loves you.....it will always be worth working out. What usually causes the fights? I know when I used to be on gear I would say nasty stuff to my wife, even though I didn't mean it....she didn't realize that at times. I would call her the worst names ever just because I knew it hurt her. Is the gear really worth losing your son and girlfriend? Maybe you should consider what you're doing. Relationships are about compromising, give a little take a little. It can't just be ALL about you and it can't just be ALL about her. Do you show her you love her? Do you treat her right? These are questions you should ask yourself. The guys are telling you to ditch her, but they probably can't hold a steady relationship or don't have kids. I wish you guys the best and how you are making her feel. Stop making this about you.

Can you stop her before the fight starts and ask to sit down and chat? If not, then you are to leave for a bit, or start by saying this is not working and I have to leave, but know I want and love my son, but fear this will damage him with our continual fighting.

If she then threatens to start fighting again, before you can talk to her about both of your problems...the time away may help you, and her and you might wish to bring outside support. The problem won't go away and your needs with your son's life is evident. With this said...make a move to end and resolve your current problems, and tell her or other(family) that you have got to have peace or an ending is near.

Good luck! Tough Love!

Originally Posted by ROID

Wisdom comes with struggle.

Nah, I think it's the Beverly Intnl Creatine Select w/ β-Alanine I just started 2 days ago, since then my mental clarity has shot through the roof of my mind... take today for example I invented a rather inexpensive way to wire solar modules and have a security system to alert the owners of theft by removal of the racking or disconnection of wires, wrote 6 new poems and solved the reason for existence, but any mortals brain would explode if I told them so I have to keep it to myself....

Originally Posted by legendkiller85

We talked we are gonna give this thing one more shot no bs this time.If things get out of control again I'm gonna pack my stuff and take it elsewere.Thanks 4 all the advice.

You guys are just fighting to have great make-up sex are you? That's just rewarding bad behavior.....I love make-up sex but you gotta keep it to once in a while and not every time you're feeling randy////

Originally Posted by maniclion

Nah, I think it's the Beverly Intnl Creatine Select w/ β-Alanine I just started 2 days ago, since then my mental clarity has shot through the roof of my mind... take today for example I invented a rather inexpensive way to wire solar modules and have a security system to alert the owners of theft by removal of the racking or disconnection of wires, wrote 6 new poems and solved the reason for existence, but any mortals brain would explode if I told them so I have to keep it to myself....

give us the web of the beta all bud

Originally Posted by DiGiTaL

Look at The_Situation's signature. might help.

Amen brutha sometime a fist in the jaw is the right answer...

Originally Posted by The Situation

give us the web of the beta all bud

I don't comprehend your meaning?

Originally Posted by brk_nemesis

Put it this way.. if you are fighting everyday, but stay only because of the kid... your child will grow up as either a retard or criminal. No joke, a kids mind at that age is like a sponge. They will get over a divorce. They wont forget years of bearing witness to two parents fighting 24/7 and being right in the thick of it.

My parents have been through a divorce, I sided with my father @ 12. Many other of my family members have had divorces as well. The kids will get over it i promise you, as long as its for a good reason, and not because you and her are lazy and just dont want to work things out. Divorce has become a "trend" now a days and sadly the concept of marriage i think has dwindled far from what it was 50 yrs ago.

Put it this way, I have a family member currently who has been in a miserable marriage for many years. They have literally sleep in different rooms for over a decade, and the fighting is pretty much a daily occurrence, especially since alcohol is involved. She makes all the money while her lazy ass husband does noting, has no job, and hasn't had one since long before the unemployment problems in this country hit. She only puts up with it all for the two kids. And now,.... the kids are pretty much fucked. They have problems in school, display anti-social tendencies, and have no concept of discipline.

Whats the point?

~Divorce is usually not the answer, but at the same time, keeping a defunct relationship together that could negatively affect the kid(s) isnt either.

My pessimistic, cynical attitude towards people and relationships is probably the result of parents who should have split but didn't. I can't undo the programming. More so, I don't have the ability to give a child what they need, so I want be reproducing. If I knock a chick up, I'm kicking her down the stairs. Parents that fight in front of their kids a fucking assholes.

^Yup. Luckily my parents split when i was 12, and my dad taught me to be independent, respectful, and hard-working to achieve what I want. Although I was very young, I still remember some of the talks I had with my mother about all kinds of BS. She wouldnt get what she wanted (usually material possessions) and her way of getting back at my father was through me. Due to all the lies and shit it she told me at a very young age, it took years before I started bonding with my father.

The rest is history as they say...

Originally Posted by maniclion

I don't comprehend your meaning?

Creatine Select w/ β-Alanine I just started 2 days ago

Originally Posted by The Situation

Creatine Select w/ β-Alanine I just started 2 days ago

You too?!?!

Originally Posted by maniclion

You too?!?!

where did you get it..lol

Originally Posted by The Situation

Creatine Select w/ β-Alanine I just started 2 days ago

Are you saying Creatine is worthless? Or is there really something to it?

Originally Posted by The Situation

where did you get it..lol

I picked it up for 21.99 at the whole foods store next to the pet shop, I had to buy something so I could use their parking space since I only wanted to go to the pet shop but it was puppy day so the place was packed, I walked around the supplements section and had been curious about Beta Alanine for sleep after an article I'd read some time back on Mind and Muscle. The guy had theorized that it may help suppress histamines during sleep and I suffer from allergies bad especially lately which effects my sleep....an added benefit I've noticed now is a mental boost, maybe from better sleep I don't know, it's the only thing I've changed in my diet.

Originally Posted by maniclion

I picked it up for 21.99 at the whole foods store next to the pet shop, I had to buy something so I could use their parking space since I only wanted to go to the pet shop but it was puppy day so the place was packed, I walked around the supplements section and had been curious about Beta Alanine for sleep after an article I'd read some time back on Mind and Muscle. The guy had theorized that it may help suppress histamines during sleep and I suffer from allergies bad especially lately which effects my sleep....an added benefit I've noticed now is a mental boost, maybe from better sleep I don't know, it's the only thing I've changed in my diet.

I'll try it inter-anally

Originally Posted by ROID

Wisdom comes with struggle.

That's why I'm so god damn smart.

cancelled my counseling, thoght wife was cheating it was a gay guy she went to dinner with. my paranoia. legend sounds great u got a plan now great job brother!

get rid of her man!

Originally Posted by unclem

cancelled my counseling, thoght wife was cheating it was a gay guy she went to dinner with. my paranoia. legend sounds great u got a plan now great job brother!

thats how it starts..the old he's gay trick.....i have a funny story

Originally Posted by brk_nemesis

Put it this way.. if you are fighting everyday, but stay only because of the kid... your child will grow up as either a retard or criminal. No joke, a kids mind at that age is like a sponge. They will get over a divorce. They wont forget years of bearing witness to two parents fighting 24/7 and being right in the thick of it.

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Well said.