Things to do while driving

david · 11-08-2002, 05:03 PM

I don't recommend this to anyone who has to drive in the SNOW and COLD!!!!!!

1. Vary your vehicle’s speed inversely with the speed limit.

2. Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to head bang.

3. At stop lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your doors.

4. Two words: Chicken suit.

5. Write the words “Help me” on your back window in red paint. The more it looks like blood, the better.

6. Have conversations, looking periodically at the passenger seat, when driving alone.

7. Laugh a lot. A whole lot.

8. Stop at the green lights.

9. Go at the red ones.

10. Occasionally wave a stuffed animal/troll doll/Barbie out your window or sunroof. Feel free to make it dance.

11. Eat food that requires silverware.

12. Pass cars, then drive very slowly.

13. Sing without having the radio on.

14. Honk frequently without motivation.

15. Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer an angry look and an obscene gesture.

david · 11-08-2002, 05:03 PM

16. Ask people for Grey Poupon.

17. Let pedestrians know who’s boss.

18. Look behind you frequently, with a very paranoid look.

19. Restart your car at every stop light.

20. Hang numerous car-fresheners in the rear-view mirror. Talk to them, stroking them lovingly.

21. Lob burning things in the windows of smokers who throw their butts out the window.

22. While stopped at a light, piss out the window/sunroof onto other cars.

23. Paint your car with occult symbols.

24. Keep at least five cats in the car.

25. Have some passengers in the back who are having wild, noisy sex.

26. Root (cheer, not snuffle in the mud) for fire trucks.

27. Stop and collect road kill.

28. Stop and pray to road kill.

29. Throw Spam.

30. Get in the fast lane and gradually...slow...down... to a stop. Then get out and watch the cars.

cliffster5 · 11-08-2002, 05:27 PM

Yep, he's already starting the weekend whoring

Dero · 11-08-2002, 05:29 PM

Show me where he STOPPED!!!

cliffster5 · 11-08-2002, 05:31 PM

da man's got his own wing in the Whore Hall Of Fame

david · 11-08-2002, 05:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dero
Show me where he STOPPED!!!

Hey, I stopped for a whole month practically!

david · 11-08-2002, 05:44 PM

If I didn't go away, I would be edging near Kuso's numbers

Only in time my friends

I've got this whole weekend!

Unless I go back to South Beach this weekend! Whoo hoo!

11-08-2002, 05:03 PM	#1
david EAST COAST BRAT Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Waterworld, FL Posts: 25,419 Photos: 2	Things to do while driving BODYBUILDING SUPPLEMENTS High Quality Supplements For Bodybuilders and Athletes. www.ironmaglabs.com I don't recommend this to anyone who has to drive in the SNOW and COLD!!!!!! 1. Vary your vehicle’s speed inversely with the speed limit. 2. Roll down your windows and blast talk radio. Attempt to head bang. 3. At stop lights, eye the person in the next car suspiciously. With a look of fear, lock your doors. 4. Two words: Chicken suit. 5. Write the words “Help me” on your back window in red paint. The more it looks like blood, the better. 6. Have conversations, looking periodically at the passenger seat, when driving alone. 7. Laugh a lot. A whole lot. 8. Stop at the green lights. 9. Go at the red ones. 10. Occasionally wave a stuffed animal/troll doll/Barbie out your window or sunroof. Feel free to make it dance. 11. Eat food that requires silverware. 12. Pass cars, then drive very slowly. 13. Sing without having the radio on. 14. Honk frequently without motivation. 15. Wave at people often. If they wave back, offer an angry look and an obscene gesture.

11-08-2002, 05:27 PM	#3
cliffster5 Grey Beard Veteran Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Salinas, CA, USA Posts: 102	Yep, he's already starting the weekend whoring
	The Dude Abides

11-08-2002, 05:29 PM	#4
Dero Registered User Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 10,779 Photos: 6	Show me where he STOPPED!!!
	Senior citizen at work, don't bugg me.

11-08-2002, 05:31 PM	#5
cliffster5 Grey Beard Veteran Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Salinas, CA, USA Posts: 102	da man's got his own wing in the Whore Hall Of Fame
	The Dude Abides

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11-08-2002, 05:44 PM	#7
david EAST COAST BRAT Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Waterworld, FL Posts: 25,419 Photos: 2	If I didn't go away, I would be edging near Kuso's numbers Only in time my friends I've got this whole weekend! Unless I go back to South Beach this weekend! Whoo hoo!

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