OMFG! Crash - you are a genius! ROTFLMFAO!![]()
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mmafiter: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing an expensive red silk blouse, a black leather mini skirt and high-heeled boots. I am tanned and very buffed. I work outeveryday. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
mmafiter: I'm 6'3 and about 250 lb. I wear glasses and have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought at Wal-Mart. I'm also wearing an old T-shirt, it's got some barbecue sauce stains on it and it smells k kind of funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
mmafiter: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my nightstand. I look up into your eyes and I'm smiling.My hand works its way down to your crotch and I begin to feel your hugeswelling bulge.
mmafiter: I'm gulping. I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
mmafiter: Now, I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
mmafiter: I'm taking hold of your blouse and I'm sliding it softly off.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk slides off of my warm body. I'm rubbing your bulge faster now, rubbing and pulling.
mmafiter: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and tears a hole in your blouse. I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's, OK. It wasn't really too expensive.
mmafiter: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it! I'm wearing a lacy black bra, my soft breasts are rising and falling as I breathe harder and harder.
mmafiter: I'm fumbling with the clasp of your bra, I think it's stuck. Doyou have scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly, I reach behind my back and undo the clasp. My bra slides off. The cool air caresses my breasts,my nipples are erect for you.
mmafiter: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby, I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
mmafiter: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
mmafiter: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
Sweetheart: WHAT?
mmafiter: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off of my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
mmafiter: I'm taking your sopping wet blouse from you and throwing it in the corner of the room.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
mmafiter: I'm screaming like a woman! Your hands are cold! Yeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
mmafiter: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out and nibbling on you. ummm, wait a second.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
mmafiter: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
mmafiter: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Is there anything I can do to help?
mmafiter: I'm running to the kitchen. Choking wildly. Looking for a cup.Where do you keep your cups??
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink!
mmafiter: I'm drinking a cup of water. There that's better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
mmafiter: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm aching for you lover.
mmafiter: Now I'm drying the cup. I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait it's dark, I'm lost. Where is the bedroom?
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
mmafiter: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tugging off your pants. I want you so badly.
mmafiter: Me too.
Sweetheart: I kiss you passionately. Our naked bodies pressed against each other.
mmafiter: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart: Why don't you take your glasses off?
mmafiter: OK. But I can't see very well. I'm placing my glasses on the nightstand.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me baby!
mmafiter: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly to the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back lover.
mmafiter: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet and lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
mmafiter: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
mmafiter: I just realized I peed in your hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bed now. Blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmmm, yes. Come on.
mmafiter: Now I'm going to put my, you know, thing in your umm, woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, Baby! Do it!
mmafiter: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. Ma'am, I'm having a little problem here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth. I can't wait another second. Slide it in! Screw me!
mmafiter: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: WHAT?
mmafiter: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
mmafiter: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my wiener all floppy.I'm looking for my glasses to see what the problem is.
Sweetheart: NO! Never mind. I'm getting dressed, I'm putting on my underwear and my wet nasty blouse.
mmafiter: No wait. I can't find the night table. I'm reaching across the dresser, knocking off cans of hairspray, your picture frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. I'm putting on my shoes.
mmafiter: Now I've found my glasses. My God! One of your candles fell onthe curtain! The curtain is on fire. I'm pointing at it with a shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell! I'm logging off, LOSER!
mmafiter: Now the carpet is on fire! Nooooooo!
230_225_220_215_210_205_200_195_190_185_180
|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|---|----|
<- that way about 20 more pounds!
OMFG! Crash - you are a genius! ROTFLMFAO!![]()
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Where there is smoke, there is not enough lubrication!
hahhahahahahahahahahaha


Aaahh-Ha-haha- ha!
MMAFITER!!!!!
You
SUCKA
i wonder if he'd read this? if not
230_225_220_215_210_205_200_195_190_185_180
|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|---|----|
<- that way about 20 more pounds!
bump
230_225_220_215_210_205_200_195_190_185_180
|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|---|----|
<- that way about 20 more pounds!
LOL.....it`s been posted before, by mmafiter himself I think but never AS mmafiter![]()
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Exactly! A lame attempt by a lame-ass poster. It's sad, really.Originally posted by kuso
LOL.....it`s been posted before, by mmafiter himself I think but never AS mmafiter![]()
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I'm not sure about that.... I'd have to see in order to believe it!![]()


that was good...I've seen it before....
geez..with a love life like that...I'm suprised my boy mmafiter has children...
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THERE IS NO TOMORROW!
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