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#1 |
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Get the Duct Tape...I'm Ripped Again!
Posts: 11,239
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Need SHORTER Jokes......
A lot of the jokes lately have been decent but loooooong, Need a "Short Joke Thread please
![]() DP What did one Lesbian frog say to the other lesbian from? MMMMMmmmmm, really does taste like "Chicken" ![]() Did you hear about the new supplement? They combined Viagra...with Bug Spray....Yeah it's called FUCKOFF! ![]() Ok...semi lame, but let's hear your's? ![]() DP |
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#2 |
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Born-again newbie
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 621
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lol
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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
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#3 |
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Born-again newbie
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 621
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Q: What's the best way to kill a man?
A: Put a pretty blonde and a six-pack in front of him. Then tell him to pick only one. |
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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
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#4 |
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Born-again newbie
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 621
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Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals" |
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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
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#5 |
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Born-again newbie
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 621
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Q: Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A: So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties. |
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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
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#6 |
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Born-again newbie
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 621
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now for you men:
Q. Why do women have breasts? A. So men will talk to them. |
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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
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#7 |
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Get the Duct Tape...I'm Ripped Again!
Posts: 11,239
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Why did Hellen Keller wear tight pants?
So you could read her lips! ![]() DP |
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#9 |
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Born-again newbie
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 621
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Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up. |
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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
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#10 |
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Get the Duct Tape...I'm Ripped Again!
Posts: 11,239
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What do you call a Blonde with two brain cells?
Pregnant! ![]() DP |
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#11 |
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Senior Member
Elite Member
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: right where I want to be
Posts: 2,225
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How many men does it take to change the light in the kitchen?
None - let the bitch cook in the dark! (It's only a fuqin joke!) |
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Where there is smoke, there is not enough lubrication!
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#12 |
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Capricorn
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California, USA
Posts: 630
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Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. |
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MAX. Q
by Howard Balzer "Roughly one minute after the space shuttle launches, it must withstand a condition of extreme force known as Max Q. Mission success demands that all systems perform at the highest level. In life, Max Q demands the same commitment to success. It requires choosing greatness, personally as well as professionally. It depends on balance, passion and courage and the wisdom gained from adversity. It is an outcome as well as an attitude." |
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#13 |
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Capricorn
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California, USA
Posts: 630
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Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men?
A: It allows them to stand closer to the sink. |
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MAX. Q
by Howard Balzer "Roughly one minute after the space shuttle launches, it must withstand a condition of extreme force known as Max Q. Mission success demands that all systems perform at the highest level. In life, Max Q demands the same commitment to success. It requires choosing greatness, personally as well as professionally. It depends on balance, passion and courage and the wisdom gained from adversity. It is an outcome as well as an attitude." |
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#14 |
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Capricorn
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California, USA
Posts: 630
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Q: If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife/girlfriend is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog. He'll shut up once you let him in. |
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MAX. Q
by Howard Balzer "Roughly one minute after the space shuttle launches, it must withstand a condition of extreme force known as Max Q. Mission success demands that all systems perform at the highest level. In life, Max Q demands the same commitment to success. It requires choosing greatness, personally as well as professionally. It depends on balance, passion and courage and the wisdom gained from adversity. It is an outcome as well as an attitude." |
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#15 |
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Capricorn
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: California, USA
Posts: 630
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Q: Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts. |
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MAX. Q
by Howard Balzer "Roughly one minute after the space shuttle launches, it must withstand a condition of extreme force known as Max Q. Mission success demands that all systems perform at the highest level. In life, Max Q demands the same commitment to success. It requires choosing greatness, personally as well as professionally. It depends on balance, passion and courage and the wisdom gained from adversity. It is an outcome as well as an attitude." |
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#16 |
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 1,179
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Why don't women fart as much as men?
Because they can't keep their mouths shut long enough to build pressure. |
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Artificial Intelligence is no match for Natural Stupidity.
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#17 |
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I'm Dead Sexxxxy!!
Elite Member
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,970
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I thought this thread was about Prince.
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Cool
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#18 |
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Get the Duct Tape...I'm Ripped Again!
Posts: 11,239
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What did the Leper say to the Prostitute?
Keep the tip! ![]() DP |
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#20 |
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SoCal. Stud
Elite Member
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****ONLY A JOKE*****
what do you say to a wemon with 2 black eyes? nothing you already told her twice (just a joke) |
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230_225_220_215_210_205_200_195_190_185_180
|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|----|---|----| <- that way about 20 more pounds! |
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