conversation with god
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Thread: conversation with god
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01-30-2012, 05:23 PM #1Senior Member ELITE MEMBER
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conversation with god
Me (in a tizzy) : God, can I ask you something?
GOD: Sure.
Me: Promise you won't get mad?
...
GOD: I promise.
Me (frustrated): Why did you let so much stuff happen to me today?
GOD: What do you mean?
Me: Well I woke up late,
GOD: Yes
Me: My car took forever to start,
GOD: Okay....
Me (growling): At lunch, they made my sandwich wrong and I had to wait
GOD: Hmmmm..
Me: On the way home, my phone went dead, just as I picked up a call
GOD: All right
Me (loudly): And to top it all off, when I got home, I just wanted to soak my feet in my foot massager and relax, but it wouldn't work. Nothing went right today! Why did you do that?
GOD: Well let me see..... the death angel was at your bed this morning and I had to send one of the other angels to battle him for your life. I let you sleep through that.
Me (humbled): Oh...
GOD: I didn't let your car start because there was a drunk driver on your route that might have hit you if you were on the road
Me (ashamed): ............
GOD: The first person who made your sandwich today was sick and I didn't want you to catch what they have, I knew you couldn't afford to miss work
Me (embarrassed): Oh.....
GOD: Your phone went dead because the person that was calling was going to give a false witness about what you said on that call, I didn't even let you talk to them so you would be covered
Me (softly): I see God
GOD: Oh and that foot massager, it had a short that was going to throw out all of the power in your house tonight. I didn't think you wanted to be in the dark.
Me: I'm sorry God.
GOD: Don't be sorry, just learn to trust me.........in all things, the good and the bad
Me: I WILL trust you God
GOD: And don't doubt that my plan for your day is always better than your plan
Me: I won't God. And let me just tell you God, thank you for everything today.
GOD: You're welcome child. It was just another day being your God and I love looking after my children.
Scriptural References: II Samuel 22:31, Proverbs 3:5, Hebrews 2:13
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01-30-2012, 05:50 PM #2Senior Member ELITE MEMBER
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Ron Paul 2012
No gym for home, work out floor with 30, but is it for 20 like 30 lb when you no lift it to be for men, for 30 lbs instead? or half is 10 for 20 pounds?
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01-30-2012, 06:49 PM #3the unbanned
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adults with imaginery friends are assholes
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01-30-2012, 06:55 PM #4Senior Member ELITE MEMBER
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Thank you for the post Dirtwarrior!
I cannot be blamed for what I say. So don't listen to what I write because I am clearly
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01-30-2012, 06:57 PM #5Registered User
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id rep u bro! but u dont need it! lol!!
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01-30-2012, 09:18 PM #6RDRSE Ghost Assassin ELITE MEMBER
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If you strike me down(ban me)I'll become more powerful than ever.. Don't say i don't warn you.
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01-30-2012, 09:21 PM #7Senior Member BOARD REP
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Originally Posted by MyK
RAWS!! Pm me for the list
Use Coupon Code "IMPittsburgh63" to receive 10% - 30% Off
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01-30-2012, 09:25 PM #8Thats Dr. Keke to you! ELITE MEMBER
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Dirt Warrior, you are a stupid faggot!
“I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too.”
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01-30-2012, 09:27 PM #9Registered User
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fam guy is the best lol
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01-30-2012, 09:37 PM #10Registered User
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01-31-2012, 12:33 AM #11Registered Abuser
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I'd enjoy listening in on this the conversations on individuals such as these. I wonder if they too whine about broken foot massager's and the quality of their sandwiches.
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01-31-2012, 12:43 AM #12Team RamRod ELITE MEMBER
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He can't be a faggot, god doesn't allow that. Originally Posted by KelJu
I love getting high, I hate getting low, and I like to drive my truck down a muddy dirt road.
I'm a great believer in luck and I find that the harder I work, the more I have of it.
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01-31-2012, 03:27 AM #13Is Doin It 4 Da Shorteez
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it is the only show that i watch with any regularity. i try to get in at least 1-2hrs of comedy a day. Originally Posted by Kirk B
I train differently than most, my beef is with gravity the weights on the bar are just the medium...Thanks to Wall Street your slice of the American Pie has been reduced to a crumb.
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01-31-2012, 05:22 AM #14Senior Member ELITE MEMBER
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I love Proverbs 3:5 and 6. They are all good scriptures but that is one of my very favorites. Thanks again Dirtwarrior for taking the "flack" to put up such a good post!
I cannot be blamed for what I say. So don't listen to what I write because I am clearly
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01-31-2012, 10:03 AM #15Senior Member
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Who ??? Originally Posted by OfficerFarva
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