Shopping List for the right man

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 09:02 AM

A guy friend of mine gave me this article about a year ago and I have kept it ever since and have shared this with many girlfriends and thought I would share this from you. This is from the Dennis Prager website and written by Lisa Cohen.

My Top Ten Tips in Being Smart While Shopping For The Right Man

1. Watch how a man treats his mother...because that is how he will treat you.
2. You don't need to know what he has in his bank account...but is he financially stable.
3. A first date could be going out for coffee. It doesn't have to be an expensive dinner. Why waste someones money and time if you know right away it is not going to work.
4. You might not like something about him on the first date. Give him another chance. People are sometimes nervous and not exactly themselves on a first date...as long as the guy doesn't seem like serial killer.
5. Ladies you don't need to sleep with the man right away. A man will respect you more for you if you wait to get to know one another better. Become friends first and talk about your interests and goals in life. His probation period should last about 2 months.
6. If he doesn't call you after the first date, don't persue him. He may be busy and if he wants to see you again he will call you eventually other wise lose his number. Men who are interested love to persue.
7. Don't talk about ex-boyfriends on the first date. It is boring and unimportant and makes you seem like you are holding onto the past. Be interested in what he has to say, men like being the center of attention.
8. Watch how a man treats his animals. If they are nurturing and gentle it is a good kind man.......as long as he doesn't treat his animal better then he treats you.
9. Remember the old movies when the man courts the woman before they consumate the relationshi[p. Let him court you and treat you like a delicate flower. He should put you on a pedestal.
10. If the man is over 40 and has never been married. chances are he's either gay or a confirmed bachelor. A lot of men are notorious for long commetted relationships but won't pop the question. Reasons are immaturity or he doesn't want the responsiblity of a family. That's not a real man. Unless he tell you upfront.

Finally going out on a first date is kind of like an interview without being so businesslike. keep interviewing until the right one comes along. But remember nobody;'s perfect...not even you.

ponyboy · 07-28-2003, 09:08 AM

Coming from a guy perspective...

I'd agree with all of those except #9. Wouldn't you rather have a guy that is going to treat you as an equal rather than put you up above him? That's how I try think of the people in my relationships...I think if you're not level then one or the other starts taking it for granted.

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 09:10 AM

I never said I totally agreed but I do think that most women totally forget to think about half if not more of these, especially if the man has money or is extremely good looking or if they think he is beyond what they noprmally could get. But it is a great reference point!!!

J'Bo · 07-28-2003, 09:33 AM

like it

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 09:50 AM

well i am glad,

**Mudge** · 07-28-2003, 10:21 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by shortstuff
1. Watch how a man treats his mother...because that is how he will treat you.

Mussolini and Hitler both treated thier mothers very well, thier lovers on the other hand, hell no.

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 10:22 AM

LOL Did you keep reading??????/

**Mudge** · 07-28-2003, 10:58 AM

I did and I feel I can pretty much agree with it, obviously there are going to be oddities like my above example, I dont believe at all that being nice to your mom means being insane either

but I was just bringing that up, nothing is foolproof.

I will very easily live up to #9, I am passive and generally will do things for people without asking, I feel that I think like a woman

but at the same time I think people should be equals, a woman would ideally be my best friend, not my captor - not exactly

Its not because I'm a mommas boy either, I didn't grow up with my mother.

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 11:06 AM

I hear what you are saying and I love this article because it still runs on the old fashioned version of dating, which I truely and strongly believe in, and so many of my friends forget and wonder why things never work out.

**Mudge** · 07-28-2003, 11:17 AM

Yeah, my dad is old fashioned and I have alot of general problems with the way things are nowdays.

gr81 · 07-28-2003, 09:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by shortstuff
9. Remember the old movies when the man courts the woman before they consumate the relationshi[p. Let him court you and treat you like a delicate flower. He should put you on a pedestal.
10. If the man is over 40 and has never been married. chances are he's either gay or a confirmed bachelor. A lot of men are notorious for long commetted relationships but won't pop the question. Reasons are immaturity or he doesn't want the responsiblity of a family. That's not a real man. Unless he tell you upfront.

Wow I am trying very hard not to be rude when I tell you how much these two offend me. Why is a man immature b/c he doesn't want marriage? that is not a real man, HA. I suppose a real man succumbs to what you want at all times by putting you on a pedestal. I think that too many men rush into marriage, what do we have to get out of it anyway. If truly love someone than it shouldn't matter if you were married or not, as long as you are together with that person. You girsl say that you want to be put on a pedestal, but you won't respect a man that actuall ydoes that, instead you stomp all over him with those high heels of yours. What is wrong with the woman showing some aggresion if she likes a man? No one should be put on a pedestal, a relationship will not work like that, besides respect is earned not given away for, at least in free in my book. I don't even know what to say, obviously a woman wrote this crap. You don't actually believe this do you?

trinsdad · 07-28-2003, 09:20 PM

Oh its simple gr81, when you really get down to it..women only want one thing............................................. .................................................. .........................................everythin g.........................................

gr81 · 07-28-2003, 09:24 PM

ha ha ha, good look T.
To say a man is immature b/c he doesn't want to marry you is so wrong. If you put a woman on a pedestal you are lookin to get hurt sometime

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 09:26 PM

I do believe most of it. As long as a man is honest with what he wants and is looking for then he is a real man but a man who does not communicate and communicate he wish and goals of the relationship regarding marriage, then most women will feel led on. I do not think a pedestal does not mean a lack of respect either way but what has happened to opening car doors and doors to buildings and walking on the street side of the sidewalk and all the old fashioned virtues of dating?????

gr81 · 07-28-2003, 09:38 PM

Chivalry died when women stopped being old fashioned. You can't be the nice guy nowadays. Alot of women out there are bitches, and before I get a bunch of responses from women telling me what a pig I am, recognize that I never said ALL. It is true though and hey, much love to the girls out there that are keeping it real and are doing their thing with respect, I wish there were more of you out there. But if you go around treating women like the delicate flowers that they aren't you are bound to get used and wrapped around their little finger. There has to be an easy medium in a relationship, there cannot be an expectation of a certain lobsided treatment otherwise things won't work out. Besides SS, instead of having a guy put on an act the first few dates, going out of his way to do the things he is "supposed" to do (i.e. open doors and pull out chairs), wouldn't you want him to be himself more or less so you can know who he really is? This way you would avoid the pitfall of learning who he really is by the 10th date and not understanding what went wrong. I think that people should be themselves and show their true colors, there should be a mutual respect. Open a door for a girl not b/c you have to, but because she would do it for you if she was there. this is getting too long, my bad. I just get upset when I hear things like that

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 09:45 PM

I totally hear what you are saying as I have heard from so many of my male friends, whom most are. I just am saying honesty is the best policy whether it be that you are romantic like david or more like yourself. And there are so many women out there who only want to play games and I feel bad when bad things happen to good guys, which gets left out much more often then the stories of women treated badly. Don't think I am totally gung ho about all this but I look at it and see look at the whole picture of the dating and the relationship because there are always signs that tell you if the relationship is what you are looking for or not or if the guy or girl is putting on an act of not.

gr81 · 07-28-2003, 10:04 PM

I feel ya SS, honesty is the way to go most of the time. I certainly don' t mean to come across like I think that most women are bitches b/c I think most guys are fools as well so it all evens out. Both genders could be more honest with each other and things would be much better off. There are alot of different people out there, some real, some fake, you just gotta do your thing and not worry about playin games and I think people will recognize that you are real and be attracted to that. Water seeks it own level right.

Hey SS where in Or are you?

shortstuff · 07-28-2003, 10:07 PM

I am in Beaverton/Tanasbourne where in Washington are you?

gr81 · 07-28-2003, 10:18 PM

just north of seattle, like the lynnwood area. Me and a bunch of my friends were planning on driving down to your state this summer, it might not happen though. How do you like living in the northwest?

**Mudge** · 07-28-2003, 10:40 PM

Women are about like guys nowdays.

Randy · 12-10-2004, 01:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mudge

Women are about like guys nowdays.

Exactly Mudge! Women today are nothing like they were way back when.
Nowadays it is us men that need the shopping list, and need to do the serious interviewing

We are the ones that should be going through the dating check off list

BoneCrusher · 12-10-2004, 01:10 AM

Yeah but fellas at the heat of the moment I can hardly remember my own name let alone a list ...

Randy · 12-10-2004, 01:25 AM

For you BC, you can go without the list

But I'm Santa Claus, I have to check the list! (And check it twice)

Luke9583 · 12-10-2004, 07:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ShortStuff

8. Watch how a man treats his animals. If they are nurturing and gentle it is a good kind man.......as long as he doesn't treat his animal better then he treats you.

Were you planning on dating Sigfreid, Roy, Paul Hogan or the Crocodile hunter?

BoneCrusher · 12-10-2004, 07:59 AM

This thread is a little aged ...

**Mudge** · 12-10-2004, 08:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shortstuff

1. Watch how a man treats his mother...because that is how he will treat you.

Strangely untrue. Hitler and Mussolini were both mamas boys but had no respect for women. One of Hitler's cousins is believed to have killed herself because of the perverse sexual acts he asked her to perform (shitting on his stomach, etc).

07-28-2003, 09:02 AM	#1
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	Shopping List for the right man A guy friend of mine gave me this article about a year ago and I have kept it ever since and have shared this with many girlfriends and thought I would share this from you. This is from the Dennis Prager website and written by Lisa Cohen. My Top Ten Tips in Being Smart While Shopping For The Right Man 1. Watch how a man treats his mother...because that is how he will treat you. 2. You don't need to know what he has in his bank account...but is he financially stable. 3. A first date could be going out for coffee. It doesn't have to be an expensive dinner. Why waste someones money and time if you know right away it is not going to work. 4. You might not like something about him on the first date. Give him another chance. People are sometimes nervous and not exactly themselves on a first date...as long as the guy doesn't seem like serial killer. 5. Ladies you don't need to sleep with the man right away. A man will respect you more for you if you wait to get to know one another better. Become friends first and talk about your interests and goals in life. His probation period should last about 2 months. 6. If he doesn't call you after the first date, don't persue him. He may be busy and if he wants to see you again he will call you eventually other wise lose his number. Men who are interested love to persue. 7. Don't talk about ex-boyfriends on the first date. It is boring and unimportant and makes you seem like you are holding onto the past. Be interested in what he has to say, men like being the center of attention. 8. Watch how a man treats his animals. If they are nurturing and gentle it is a good kind man.......as long as he doesn't treat his animal better then he treats you. 9. Remember the old movies when the man courts the woman before they consumate the relationshi[p. Let him court you and treat you like a delicate flower. He should put you on a pedestal. 10. If the man is over 40 and has never been married. chances are he's either gay or a confirmed bachelor. A lot of men are notorious for long commetted relationships but won't pop the question. Reasons are immaturity or he doesn't want the responsiblity of a family. That's not a real man. Unless he tell you upfront. Finally going out on a first date is kind of like an interview without being so businesslike. keep interviewing until the right one comes along. But remember nobody;'s perfect...not even you.

07-28-2003, 09:08 AM	#2
ponyboy Training Trainer Elite Member Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Running around somewhere Posts: 2,608 Photos: 1	Coming from a guy perspective... I'd agree with all of those except #9. Wouldn't you rather have a guy that is going to treat you as an equal rather than put you up above him? That's how I try think of the people in my relationships...I think if you're not level then one or the other starts taking it for granted.
	Today I can do what others will not so that tomorrow I will do what others cannot. The difference between winners and losers is that winners do things that losers don't want to do.

07-28-2003, 09:10 AM	#3
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	I never said I totally agreed but I do think that most women totally forget to think about half if not more of these, especially if the man has money or is extremely good looking or if they think he is beyond what they noprmally could get. But it is a great reference point!!!
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 09:33 AM	#4
J'Bo Cuddle Slut Join Date: May 2002 Location: Back in Canada Posts: 9,753 Photos: 6	like it
	....and thats my $.02

07-28-2003, 09:50 AM	#5
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	well i am glad,
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 10:22 AM	#7
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	LOL Did you keep reading??????/
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 10:58 AM	#8
Mudge Pizza the Hut Super Moderator Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 23,027 Photos: 1	I did and I feel I can pretty much agree with it, obviously there are going to be oddities like my above example, I dont believe at all that being nice to your mom means being insane either but I was just bringing that up, nothing is foolproof. I will very easily live up to #9, I am passive and generally will do things for people without asking, I feel that I think like a woman but at the same time I think people should be equals, a woman would ideally be my best friend, not my captor - not exactly Its not because I'm a mommas boy either, I didn't grow up with my mother.
	Kinesiology Vote @ Top 25 Deads Comp Bench Motivation Bench form MaxCalc Charles Poliquin When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao-Tzu I don't know any sources so don't ask - thanks

07-28-2003, 11:06 AM	#9
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	I hear what you are saying and I love this article because it still runs on the old fashioned version of dating, which I truely and strongly believe in, and so many of my friends forget and wonder why things never work out.
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 11:17 AM	#10
Mudge Pizza the Hut Super Moderator Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 23,027 Photos: 1	Yeah, my dad is old fashioned and I have alot of general problems with the way things are nowdays.
	Kinesiology Vote @ Top 25 Deads Comp Bench Motivation Bench form MaxCalc Charles Poliquin When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao-Tzu I don't know any sources so don't ask - thanks

07-28-2003, 09:20 PM	#12
trinsdad The All Unknowing!! Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: knoxville Posts: 158	Oh its simple gr81, when you really get down to it..women only want one thing............................................. .................................................. .........................................everythin g.........................................
	"The Harder You Work the Harder it is to Surrender." -Vince Lombardi "The Harder You Work the Harder it is." -Trinsdad

07-28-2003, 09:24 PM	#13
gr81 You Lack Intensity!!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Just below our civil disguise Posts: 6,378 Photos: 10	ha ha ha, good look T. To say a man is immature b/c he doesn't want to marry you is so wrong. If you put a woman on a pedestal you are lookin to get hurt sometime
	Testosterone Site/Elite Fitness-Dave Tate/West Side Barbell/Berardi Nutrition & Sports Performance/Steroid Laws- Rick Collins/John Defendis Intensity or Insanity articles/Save the Supersonics

07-28-2003, 09:26 PM	#14
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	I do believe most of it. As long as a man is honest with what he wants and is looking for then he is a real man but a man who does not communicate and communicate he wish and goals of the relationship regarding marriage, then most women will feel led on. I do not think a pedestal does not mean a lack of respect either way but what has happened to opening car doors and doors to buildings and walking on the street side of the sidewalk and all the old fashioned virtues of dating?????
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 09:38 PM	#15
gr81 You Lack Intensity!!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Just below our civil disguise Posts: 6,378 Photos: 10	Chivalry died when women stopped being old fashioned. You can't be the nice guy nowadays. Alot of women out there are bitches, and before I get a bunch of responses from women telling me what a pig I am, recognize that I never said ALL. It is true though and hey, much love to the girls out there that are keeping it real and are doing their thing with respect, I wish there were more of you out there. But if you go around treating women like the delicate flowers that they aren't you are bound to get used and wrapped around their little finger. There has to be an easy medium in a relationship, there cannot be an expectation of a certain lobsided treatment otherwise things won't work out. Besides SS, instead of having a guy put on an act the first few dates, going out of his way to do the things he is "supposed" to do (i.e. open doors and pull out chairs), wouldn't you want him to be himself more or less so you can know who he really is? This way you would avoid the pitfall of learning who he really is by the 10th date and not understanding what went wrong. I think that people should be themselves and show their true colors, there should be a mutual respect. Open a door for a girl not b/c you have to, but because she would do it for you if she was there. this is getting too long, my bad. I just get upset when I hear things like that
	Testosterone Site/Elite Fitness-Dave Tate/West Side Barbell/Berardi Nutrition & Sports Performance/Steroid Laws- Rick Collins/John Defendis Intensity or Insanity articles/Save the Supersonics

07-28-2003, 09:45 PM	#16
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	I totally hear what you are saying as I have heard from so many of my male friends, whom most are. I just am saying honesty is the best policy whether it be that you are romantic like david or more like yourself. And there are so many women out there who only want to play games and I feel bad when bad things happen to good guys, which gets left out much more often then the stories of women treated badly. Don't think I am totally gung ho about all this but I look at it and see look at the whole picture of the dating and the relationship because there are always signs that tell you if the relationship is what you are looking for or not or if the guy or girl is putting on an act of not.
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 10:04 PM	#17
gr81 You Lack Intensity!!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Just below our civil disguise Posts: 6,378 Photos: 10	I feel ya SS, honesty is the way to go most of the time. I certainly don' t mean to come across like I think that most women are bitches b/c I think most guys are fools as well so it all evens out. Both genders could be more honest with each other and things would be much better off. There are alot of different people out there, some real, some fake, you just gotta do your thing and not worry about playin games and I think people will recognize that you are real and be attracted to that. Water seeks it own level right. Hey SS where in Or are you?
	Testosterone Site/Elite Fitness-Dave Tate/West Side Barbell/Berardi Nutrition & Sports Performance/Steroid Laws- Rick Collins/John Defendis Intensity or Insanity articles/Save the Supersonics

07-28-2003, 10:07 PM	#18
shortstuff Trying to Survive Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Oregon Posts: 3,727	I am in Beaverton/Tanasbourne where in Washington are you?
	Good things come to those who wait........

07-28-2003, 10:18 PM	#19
gr81 You Lack Intensity!!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Just below our civil disguise Posts: 6,378 Photos: 10	just north of seattle, like the lynnwood area. Me and a bunch of my friends were planning on driving down to your state this summer, it might not happen though. How do you like living in the northwest?
	Testosterone Site/Elite Fitness-Dave Tate/West Side Barbell/Berardi Nutrition & Sports Performance/Steroid Laws- Rick Collins/John Defendis Intensity or Insanity articles/Save the Supersonics

07-28-2003, 10:40 PM	#20
Mudge Pizza the Hut Super Moderator Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 23,027 Photos: 1	Women are about like guys nowdays.
	Kinesiology Vote @ Top 25 Deads Comp Bench Motivation Bench form MaxCalc Charles Poliquin When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao-Tzu I don't know any sources so don't ask - thanks

12-10-2004, 01:10 AM	#22
BoneCrusher Lift or Die Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Austin Texas Posts: 8,545	Yeah but fellas at the heat of the moment I can hardly remember my own name let alone a list ...

12-10-2004, 01:25 AM	#23
Randy Woof! Woof! Woof! Elite Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: California Posts: 7,859 Photos: 4	For you BC, you can go without the list But I'm Santa Claus, I have to check the list! (And check it twice)
	- O F F I C I A L . L I N K . M A S T E R - Maintains a Reference to all Gopros P/RR/S Links Gopros latest routines: CLICK HERE Lift like a Chicken Look Like a Chicken

12-10-2004, 07:59 AM	#25
BoneCrusher Lift or Die Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Austin Texas Posts: 8,545	This thread is a little aged ...