![]() |
![]() |
![]() |
|
|||||||
| Photo Gallery | Register | Members List | Videos | Blogs | Search | Today's Posts | Mark Forums Read |
| Open Chat General adult talk about life, relationships or whatever you want to discuss.
Sponsored by: HumaneVoLabs.com |
![]() |
|
|
LinkBack | Thread Tools | Display Modes |
|
|
#1 |
|
Peelosopher
|
Help me come up with a wise-cracking response...
My folks live in South Carolina and I go to school in Florida.
so whenever I come back to SC to visit from school I get comments on how white I am and that I don't have a tan "You've been in Florida for a year and you don't have a tan?" Apparently, living in Florida automatically suggests that I live outside, naked. C'mon, really. Excuse me for taking my classes INDOORS. I usually respond with a sly "You know they have roofs on our homes there in Florida too," but I don't feel like I'm doing this response enough justice. And I hear this alot. Especially as critical as my mother is, every time she introduces me to someone her near exact words are "Yeah he studies in Florida," points at my face and says, "Can't you tell?" So teach me how to be a bigger smart-ass, I need some ideas. I'm sure albobo has some ideas ![]() |
|
|
|
|
|
#2 |
|
My Role Model
Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 15,614
|
Tell'em you transferred to Canada, we all live in Igloos
![]() |
|
Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.
Michael Jordan |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3 |
|
Cheerfully Offensive
|
Tell them your new major, necrophilia, is very time-consuming & requires extensive work underground.
|
|
The lions sing and the hills take flight.
The moon by day, and the sun by night. Blind woman, deaf man, jackdaw fool. Let the Lord of Chaos rule. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#4 |
|
The Original Jackass
|
Just shrug and say that your face is between Titanya's legs too much to get tanned.
![]() |
|
If god were suddenly condemned to live the life which he has inflicted on man, he would kill himself.
- Alexander Dumas (1802 - 1870) |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#5 | |
|
Peelosopher
|
Quote:
![]() ![]() |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#6 | |
|
The Original Jackass
|
Quote:
Does your mom point at your penis and say "See how white it is?" ![]() |
|
|
If god were suddenly condemned to live the life which he has inflicted on man, he would kill himself.
- Alexander Dumas (1802 - 1870) |
||
|
|
|
|
|
#8 |
|
Moderator
Moderator
|
Next time your mom says that, go, "Fuck off bitch, now go get your ass back in the kitchen, and make me some pie.
![]() |
|
If sense were common, everyone would have it.
4/2007-Current 75th Ranked most popular image 1 spot behind Prince's bulge... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#9 |
|
The Original Jackass
|
You forgot 'before I slap you in the face!' ![]() |
|
If god were suddenly condemned to live the life which he has inflicted on man, he would kill himself.
- Alexander Dumas (1802 - 1870) |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#10 |
|
IDIOT SAVANT
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: An alternate reality.
Posts: 10,159
|
Cronno's mom to friend: "Yeah, he studies in Florida." Points at Cronno's pale face and says, "Can't you tell?"
Cronno to mom's friend: "Yes, I'm studying XXX-rated film production but since our budget doesn't allow for sun screen we have to do all our filming in my room." ![]() |
|
Rules? You mean we have RULES for that???
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#13 |
|
Cheerfully Offensive
|
"My job at Disney World keeps me in costume all day."
"Really, which character are you?" "You know that giant Mickey they have walking in the daily parade? " "Uh-huh." "Well, you're looking at his left testicle right here!" |
|
The lions sing and the hills take flight.
The moon by day, and the sun by night. Blind woman, deaf man, jackdaw fool. Let the Lord of Chaos rule. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#14 | |
|
IDIOT SAVANT
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: An alternate reality.
Posts: 10,159
|
Quote:
![]() |
|
|
Rules? You mean we have RULES for that???
|
||
|
|
|
|
|
#15 | |
|
Cutting sucks.
|
Quote:
im sorry, but thats absolutely fucking hillarious!!! |
|
|
cutting sucks.
|
||
|
|
|
|
|
#16 |
|
Pizza the Hut
Super Moderator
|
Whats the BFD in the first place? Tell your mother to go solve world hunger or something instead of worrying about you having or not having your skin cancer.
Pretty damn superficial IMO. At least you are in school and not hanging at nude beaches all day. I was born white and I'm still white, thats life. |
|
Kinesiology Vote @ Top 25 Deads Comp Bench
Motivation Bench form MaxCalc Charles Poliquin When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao-Tzu I don't know any sources so don't ask - thanks |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#17 |
|
Catalyst
Elite Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Hawaii, selling munitions for the war on EcoTerror
Posts: 17,911
Photos: 10 |
tell them that your lack of melanin increases your chances of melanoma.
I live in Hawaii, when I went back to the mainland I heard the same crap. I just reminded them that they can mock my skin all they wanted cause when I got back to Hawaii I'd think about them freezing in the Sub-Zero winters while I sat on my shady porch sipping a cold lemonade on Christmas Day. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#18 |
|
on my way to ISSA
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Illinois
Posts: 376
|
You should come home one day with lots of fake bronzer on----looking horribly nasty
she'll never bug you about your whiteness again |
|
Vote Quimby!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#19 | |
|
Pizza the Hut
Super Moderator
|
Quote:
![]() |
|
|
Kinesiology Vote @ Top 25 Deads Comp Bench
Motivation Bench form MaxCalc Charles Poliquin When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao-Tzu I don't know any sources so don't ask - thanks |
||
|
|
|
|
|
#20 |
|
Six String Samurai
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Dallas
Posts: 1,313
|
Looks like Im too late bro. All the good one liners are taken. But
"Mira no me des pedo por que yo te mato" has always worked for me. |
|
http://www.thestranglehold.com/images/pix/Batista.jpg
Someday....I will be like you.... |
|
|
|
|
![]() |
| Thread Tools | |
| Display Modes | |
|
|
Similar Threads
|
||||
| Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
| below BMR starvation response | swimgirl089 | Diet & Nutrition | 3 | 06-21-2004 08:58 PM |
| Cracking Bones | Emma Lanni | Training | 3 | 05-20-2004 06:37 PM |
| knees cracking | tigerstile | Training | 4 | 10-19-2003 06:33 PM |
| The NHE and ONE - cut and bulk | Robboe | Online Journals | 567 | 08-13-2003 06:28 PM |
| The Wise Old Farmer | Rusty | Open Chat | 0 | 05-09-2003 06:49 AM |