A buddy of mine just died

**Flex** · 10-01-2004, 06:56 PM

I just wanted to take a moment to say a prayer for my friend.
I just found out a kid who used to be my best friend just died today. Albert Thomas Zizzamia was absolute best friend in the world when i was growing up as a kid. His mother used to babysit us as infants. We lived 5 houses apart, and were unseperable as children. Then, entering middle school, his parents got divorced, he moved away within town and we kinda lost touch. We were practically strangers once high school came. Then this past summer, he came to my college graduation party. It was the first time i'd even seen him in at least 5 years, nevermind talk to him.

I guess his longtime girlfriend of 8yrs whom he recently married, whom he loved deeply, up and told him she didn't want him anymore and wanted him to move out . He commited suicide. He was 24years old. Now his "wife" has the nerve to tell his mother she wanted him cremated and she wants 1/2 his ashes. What nerve.

To everyone: Please don't take anything for granted, especially life. Every single day is a gift.

At least i got to see him once more.
My prayers go out to his mom, dad, brother and sister.
Rest in Peace, Al

**Crono1000** · 10-01-2004, 06:59 PM

my prayers are with you, his family, and everyone affected flex. I'm deeply sorry

**Rocco32** · 10-01-2004, 07:01 PM

Sorry Flex. His family has my prayers as well as you. I had a friend committ suicide about 4 years ago. It's a different type of grief to deal with.

**Vieope** · 10-01-2004, 07:11 PM

That is very sad Flex. I wish you and his family all the best things.

**PreMier** · 10-01-2004, 07:12 PM

I have had 2 friends hang themselves. Its amazing that you think all is well, and the next week 'bam' the shit hits the fan.

Sorry to hear that bro. They arent going to cremate him are they? His mother knows the truth right?

**madden player** · 10-01-2004, 07:15 PM

Originally Posted by Flex

I..To everyone: Please don't take anything for granted, especially life. Every single day is a gift..

Very true..Sorry for the loss..Thoughts and Prayers.

**Vieope** · 10-01-2004, 07:19 PM

Originally Posted by PreMier

I have had 2 friends hang themselves.

That is such a horrible way to die.
If you don´t mind me asking Flex, do you know in what circumstances he commited suicide?

**P-funk** · 10-01-2004, 07:20 PM

wish you the best flex.....very sorry for your loss.

**gr81** · 10-01-2004, 07:21 PM

my nig, you know that my deepest condolences are out to you dude. I can't say my prayers are with you b/c I don't pray but can't imagine what his family and friends are going through now.. wow.. you know if you need to talk I'm your man.. RIP to your man. I am truly sorry for your loss. honor his memory the best you can and be grateful you knew him so well and showed him love.. don't know what else to say but I am sorry man

**busyLivin** · 10-01-2004, 07:33 PM

Suicides are the worst to hear about... I can't imagine things being so bad that suicide seems to be the only way out. So sad, sorry for your loss.

**BoneCrusher** · 10-01-2004, 08:30 PM

Sorry Flex ... best to ya mayn.

**camarosuper6** · 10-01-2004, 08:32 PM

Keep your chin up. Ive had a good friend committ suicide too. I know what your going through. You need anything, feel free to PM me.

God Bless.

**adrien_j9** · 10-01-2004, 10:48 PM

Flex, I understand what you are going through more than I wish. I'm so sorry for your loss. I do pray, constantly it seems now, and will include his family and you. If there is ever anything that I can do, contact me in any way you wish. Again, I am so sorry for your loss.

**Weight39** · 10-01-2004, 10:53 PM

Best wishes, man. I lost a friend to suicide, a few years ago.

**Mudge** · 10-01-2004, 11:08 PM

What a rotten way to go.

**milliman** · 10-01-2004, 11:16 PM

Our prayers are with you my friend.

Life is but a vapor . . .
Here today and gone tomorrow. . .

We need to enjoy all of our friends (and especially family) as though it were
the last time we were going to see them. Because you never know when it
may be the last time.

**maniclion** · 10-02-2004, 01:16 AM

Take some time and write down all you can remember about him, it helps.

**pop** · 10-02-2004, 05:01 AM

iam sorry m8 , i lost me big brother 3 days ago it hurts like hell.

**Flex** · 10-02-2004, 05:54 AM

Thanks SO much everyone. Your sympathy and compassion really helped.

Adrien- I know you're going through the same thing. It's terrible.
pop- sorry about your brother. that's gotta be rough.

The lesson we have to learn from death is exactly what milliman said,
"We need to enjoy all of our friends (and especially family) as though it were
the last time we were going to see them. Because you never know when it
may be the last time."

**Jenny** · 10-02-2004, 06:36 AM

I'm so sorry to hear this Flex

You're in my thoughts.

**Flex** · 10-02-2004, 05:56 PM

I talked to his mother briefly on the phone tonite. I just felt SO bad for her. I could hear her shaking on the other side of the line.

Crono-Thanks, man

Rock-Thanks, and It's SO tough, huh?

Vieope-thanks, bro. we still don't know how it happened...

Pfunk-thanks, bro.

Gr81-i appreciate your sincere words, as usual

Busylivin-thanks, man. people don't realize that suicide shouldn't even be an option...

bone-thanks, bro

Camaro-thanks, and God bless you too

weight-thanks, man

Manic-alls i have of him are memories. that's all i need

Jenny-thanks alot, hun

the wake is in a few days. it's very tough for me to go to these things....

**greekblondechic** · 10-02-2004, 11:08 PM

I'm sorry honey. It must be hard, I am sad that a lot of bad things are happening to our members lately. Be strong *hugs*

**BUSTINOUT** · 10-03-2004, 03:44 PM

Originally Posted by Flex

the wake is in a few days. it's very tough for me to go to these things....

I understant Flex, but keep in mind...it ain't about you, but rather showing respect for your friend and support to his family. Wakes/ funerals are tough for everyone...imagine his mom. Sorry for your loss man. Your friends family is in my prayers.

**firestorm** · 10-03-2004, 04:00 PM

Flex I'm sorry bro. My thoughts and prayers go out to them as well old friend.

**RexStunnahH** · 10-04-2004, 03:20 AM

Sorry to hear that man,My condolences.Best wishes to you and his family.

**OceanDude** · 10-04-2004, 06:12 AM

Sorry to hear about this Flex. Memories of childhood friends and the good innocent times we all had when we were growing up are what shape our identity and character. People often do not reflect that all of those friends helped shape who we are and they become part of us through mutual experiences, decisions, common trials and struggles etc. The closer a person was to another, especially during the formative years, the more the identity is mirrored in self. Parents of childhood friends often become nearly as close as our own and they too will relate you to their lost child. They will see things in you and remember events that will be some reflection of their own offspring and they will likely think of you as family all their life - especially now.

It is always sad to hear of cases where someone takes their own life due to another relationship coming to an end. Some do so to try to prove how much they love another. Other do so in an attempt to force the other to share the same pain they do all their lives. Others simply decide they can't live with the pain. No matter the reason it it always tragic because few are able to step away from their torment long enough to think through what their deaths will mean to their family and friends and never give thought to the pain that they will cause them. Most forget that their actions affect more than just themselves or the immediate target of their pain. If such could think of this one thing before they committed the deed I am sure that they would see the reason to live. They would then chose to live and mock the pain for the sake of their families and friends. They would be better off for overcoming the pain and living for the sake of those more worthy of life and devotion than the thing which torments them.

May God bless Albert and may he console his family and friends and remind us all that we have but a short walk along the intersecting pathways of Creation and to do our part to be there for those who need help along the way.

OD

**Sapphire** · 10-04-2004, 06:45 AM

Oh I am sooo sorry!!! That is terrible. You are right, life is a gift, never to be taken for granted. My prayers are with your friend and his family.

Cyndi

**OceanDude** · 10-04-2004, 06:58 AM

Originally Posted by PreMier

I have had 2 friends hang themselves. Its amazing that you think all is well, and the next week 'bam' the shit hits the fan.

Sorry to hear that bro. They arent going to cremate him are they? His mother knows the truth right?

Premier am I picking up here that you know some kind of common "fraud" in the practice of cremation? I would like to hear what it is since I have instinctively always suspected it was a con game and that the ashes were just whatever they swept up from ash ben in a big pile at the end of the day. I have never personally approved of cremation.

OD

**PreMier** · 10-04-2004, 03:54 PM

OD, I am not sure I totally understand your Q.. But when they cremate someone, most of the ashes that are picked up are from the wooden box that the person was in. Seeing as 90% or so of our bodies are made of water, the person basically evaporates.. Hope that helps.

**Vieope** · 10-04-2004, 04:00 PM

He thinks that there is some kind of fraud going on in the process, like removing organs and selling them to a medical school. I don´t like the whole idea of cremation as well.

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