Thread: Funnies

Now that the election is over, some really important things to contemplate:

1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze those dangly things and drink whatever comes out?"

2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm going to eat that oval white thing that comes out of its butt."

3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

5. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

6. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when asking where the bathroom is?

7. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

8. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

9. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why doesn't he just buy dinner?

10. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

11. If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

12. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

13. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

14. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

15. Stop singing and read on.........

16. Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

17. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your a**?

18. Did you notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

19 Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

funny pic....