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#1 |
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Senior Member
Elite Member
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43 Metaphors For Stupidity
1.Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
2.A few clowns short of a circus. 3.An experiment in Artificial Stupidity. 4.The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead. 5.All foam, no beer. 6.Has an IQ of 2 but... it takes 3 to grunt. 7.Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear. 8.Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel. 9.As smart as bait. 10.Chimney's clogged. 11.Sharp as a bag of wet mice. 12.Her sewing machine's out of thread. 13.His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels. 14.If he had another brain, it would be lonely. 15.Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. 16.Receiver is off the hook. 17.Skylight leaks a little. 18.Too much yardage between the goal posts. 19.In the pinball game of life, his flippers were a little farther apart than most. 20.He's a few sandwiches short of a picnic. 21.His elevator doesn't stop at every floor. 22.He's not wrapped too tight. 23.He's a few beers short of a six pack. 24.The lights are on but nobody's home. 25.She's a few French fries short of a happy meal. 26.He's a few singers short of a barbershop quartet. 27.Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. 28.Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching. 29.A room temperature IQ. 30.Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them together. 31.A photographic memory, but the lens cover is glued on. 32.A prime candidate for natural deselection. 33.Bright as Alaska in December. 34.During evolution his ancestors were in the control group. 35.Fell out of the family tree. 36.Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. 37.Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it. 38.He's so dense, light bends around him. 39.If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week. 40.If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean. 41.It's hard to believe that he beat 100,000 other sperm. 42.Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled. 43.Takes him 1.5 hours to watch "60 Minutes". |
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#2 |
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Moderator
Moderator
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44. Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree
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#3 |
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Esprit de Corps
Elite Member
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#1 and #27 are duplicates
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NEVER write a check with your mouth that you can't cash with your ASS!! I can run faster mad than you can scared "All right brain... I don't like you and you don't like me. So let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer" ~ Homer Simpson |
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#4 |
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Esprit de Corps
Elite Member
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¥Ω☺
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NEVER write a check with your mouth that you can't cash with your ASS!! I can run faster mad than you can scared "All right brain... I don't like you and you don't like me. So let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer" ~ Homer Simpson |
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#7 |
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Esprit de Corps
Elite Member
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"He who shall not be spoken of" was not mentioned. I just happen to like Wingdings
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NEVER write a check with your mouth that you can't cash with your ASS!! I can run faster mad than you can scared "All right brain... I don't like you and you don't like me. So let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer" ~ Homer Simpson |
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#9 | |
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RIP Foreman
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 6,002
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Quote:
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