Thread: Some humour for men

And women who have a good sense of humour...

How many men does it take to open a beer?
>> None. It should be opened when she brings it.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
>> Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably
>> never be able to support you.
>> --------------------------------------------------------------------
>> Why do women have smaller feet than men?
>> It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
>> them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
>> When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> How do you fix a woman's watch?
>> You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> Why do men fart more than women?
>> Because women can't shut up long enough to
>> build up the required pressure.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the
>> front door, who do you let in first?
>> The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
>> A woman who won't do what she's told.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> I married a Miss Right.
>> I just didn't know her first name was Always.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
>> a woman's sex drive by 90%.
>> It's called a Wedding Cake.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> Why do men die before their wives?
>> They want to.
>> --------------------------------------------------------------- ----
>> Women will never be equal to men until they can
>> walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
>> gut, and still think they are sexy.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
>> Then God created Man and rested.
>> Then God created Woman.
>> Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
>> -------------------------------------------------------------------
>> Send this to a few good men who need a laugh and
>> to the select few women who can handle the truth

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