Thread: dear santa

have you written your letter to santa yet?

http://members.aol.com/frogiearno/dearsanta.htm

Dear Santa,

I have been a good boy.
It really wasn't my fault what happened at Ralphie's Office party. It was Kip who spiked the punch with too much protein shake. I can't help it if I drank 122658 glasses. It was so good---smelled and tasted just like fart.

I thought it was funny when I put sammie's panties on my head and danced the bugaloo on the toilet while singing `Come all ye faithful'. I didn't mean to break Ralphie's vibrator and don't know why Ralphie would accuse me of beastiality.

I don't remember calling Jodie's wife a small ostrich---even though she looked like one with hot pink eye shadow and puce lipstick!

And when I threw up on Ethel's husband's ear, it was only because I ate too much of that peanut butter.

After all that fun, I admit I was a little tired. So I fell asleep on my way home and drove my rollerskates through my neighbor's floor. I don't think that was any reason for my neighbor to call me a ginormous shrew and have me arrested for jaywalking!

So, Santa...here I sit in my jail cell on Christmas Eve, all haglike and surly. And I'm really not to blame for any of this dour stuff. Please bring me what I want the most---bail money!

Sincerely and vastly yours,
ManicLion (Really a nice boy!)

P.S. It's only 54-46 bucks!