Thread: Translation of common phrases from woman-speak into English.

LOL, so true

Originally Posted by ForemanRules

Woman-speak: "I can't find a good man to marry"
English: "I wasted my life focusing on my hate for men, and now I am fucked, the women's movement has destroyed my life"

Originally Posted by ForemanRules

Woman-speak: "You are not the man I married"
English: "In spite of years of manipulation, ridicule and doing my best to mind fuck you on a daily basis to change you into what I want, you have resisted me. Fuck you, no more sex, get out of my life..."

Woman-speak: "I can't find a good man to marry"
English: "I wasted my life focusing on my hate for men, and now I am fucked, the women's movement has destroyed my life"

it's kinda funny that she's so mean but he still wants pussy. like if there's pussy on one end n a cotton mouth on the other a guys still going to be after it.

Foreman, do you hate women?

Originally Posted by fufu

Foreman, do you hate women?

I do not hate any exercise

Originally Posted by ForemanRules

I do not hate any exercise

• Strong woman - Bitch with a severe case of self entitlement.
• Classy - Bitchy 45 year old real estate agent type.
• Seeking gentleman - Looking for rich guy who isn't interested in sex.
• World traveler - would love to go to Europe as long as you're buying.
• Intelligent - She isn't but thinks she is, and you'd better entertain her.
• Rubenesque - Fat
• Sarcastic - Bought into the whole Gen X irony thing and is really a miserable bore to hang out with.
• Make me laugh - You're expected to be highly entertaining right away.
• Sick of bar scene - She doesn't get hit on at bars due to one or more physical flaws.
• Friends first - Reformed slut
• Tired of games/jerks - I fucked and sucked my way through fifteen counties, but now I want a docile schmuck to pay my bills and not pester me for sex.
• Shapely - Fat
• BBW - Grossly, morbidly obese (Bring Burgers With)
• Must like kids - I want a putz who will break his ass paying for another man's cast off progeny.
• Loves the Outdoors - Closet Lesbo
• Snuggling and Warm Fires - No Sex
• Enjoys Traveling - You're paying, right?
• Fun Loving - Fucked 100 guys
• Meaningful Relationship - Slavery
• Nurturing - Smothering
• Sassy - Insufferable by the third date.
• Bubbly - All fuckin happy all the damn time to the point of annoying.
• No games! - I won't put up with your games, but I will gladly infuriate you with mine.
• Eccentric or quirky - Psycho...
• Grown up man - Sucker willing to marry and support my lazy fat ass.
• Financially Secure - You should own about 200,000 shares of MSFT.

Hahahaha

If you record a woman talking and then play it backwards at 1/4 speed you'll hear demons whisper sweet nothings in your ear.

I find this thread offensive

this thread needs to be removed!

Originally Posted by fufu

Foreman, do you hate women?

I'll answer that...
Woman hate him, he is now down to Queers and Drag queens...if that.

"Fine": This is the word a woman uses at the end of any argument that she feels she is right about but needs to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.

"Five minutes": This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

"Nothing": This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".

"Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".

"Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

<Loud Sigh>: This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A <Loud Sigh> means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

<Soft Sigh>: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. <Soft Sighs> are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.

"Oh": This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night."

If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit.

She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days.

"Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them.

"That's Okay": This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

"Please Do": This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".

"Thanks": A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're welcome.

"Thanks a lot": This is much different from "Thanks". A woman will say, "Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh".

Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".

Woman-speak: "I do"
English: "No more blowjobs"

hahaha

the woman hating on this board is at an all time high.

Originally Posted by MyK

"Fine": This is the word a woman uses at the end of any argument that she feels she is right about but needs to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how a woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments.

"Five minutes": This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an even trade.

"Nothing": This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine".

"Go Ahead" (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine".

"Go Ahead" (normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off.

<Loud Sigh>: This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A <Loud Sigh> means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing".

<Soft Sigh>: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. <Soft Sighs> are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content.

"Oh": This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night."

If she says "Oh" before a statement, RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit.

She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days.

"Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that we can't bring ourselves to write about them.

"That's Okay": This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble.

"Please Do": This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay".

"Thanks": A woman is thanking you. Do not faint; just say you're welcome.

"Thanks a lot": This is much different from "Thanks". A woman will say, "Thanks a lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh".

Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".

these are so true... lol.

Originally Posted by maniclion

If you record a woman talking and then play it backwards at 1/4 speed you'll hear demons whisper sweet nothings in your ear.

Originally Posted by ForemanRules

• 
  
• Loves the Outdoors -
• Snuggling and Warm Fires -
  

those things are supposed to lead to wild sex

and not with women bleh.....