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And now, a few words from TV

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  1. #1
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    And now, a few words from TV

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    Most of us learn our first words from our parents, which is why we carry around some goofy saying like "You need that toy like a moose needs a hatrack" for the rest of our lives.
    Next we absorb words from the community, which explains why people from different towns have no idea that a hoagie, a grinder, a sub and a hero are the same sandwich.
    But when we start watching TV, ah, that's when we really start speaking American.
    In that spirit, the TV Land network plans a feature the week of Dec. 11 called "The 100 Greatest TV Quotes & Catchphrases."

    As the title suggests, it's reruns of phrases that have barged into all our lives at some point, from "I can't believe I ate the whole thing" to "D'oh" from "The Simpsons" to Walter Cronkite's "And that's the way it is" and Paris Hilton's "That's hot!"
    Only television could get Walter Cronkite and Paris Hilton into the same sentence.
    A few favorites are missing, like "Goodnight and good luck," "And away we go," "More Parks sausages, Mom, please," "I'm Chevy Chase and you're not" or "There are 8 million stories in the Naked City."

    It does have Marcia Brady's "Oh, my nose," however, and everyone will find some phrases they once couldn't escape.
    "Book 'em, Danno," from "Hawaii Five-O." "Two wild and crazy guys" from "Saturday Night Live." "Who loves ya, baby?" from "Kojak." "Dy-no-mite" by J.J. Walker from "Good Times." "Sock it to me."

    At the same time, this list also suggests that, to no one's shock, TV is derivative and fleeting.
    Just as "D'oh" adapted a sarcastic syllable from the 1950s, Hilton's "That's hot" recycles a word that wasn't new when Theodore Metz wrote "There'll Be a Hot Time in the Old Town Tonight" in 1886.

    It's also striking that 90% of TV Land's phrases, even recent ones like "They killed Kenny" from "South Park," already play like period pieces.
    That's not a criticism. It just proves that language changes faster than we realize. Hip hop alone has dropped probably 50 new phrases into our language. The tech world, more.
    TV, which is more collector than creator, scoops them all up and passes them out.
    A few phrases on the TV Land list have some legs: "The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat," "How sweet it is." But in 60 years, TV has yet to create a line with the durability of "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn" or the flair of "Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. America and all the ships at sea."

    TV goes for what works now, wears it out and moves on. A lot of people today would know 90 phrases on this list. A lot of people a century from now will look at it and wonder why. You had to be there.

    Originally published on November 29, 2006

  2. #2
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    In alphabetical order, TV Land's list:
    _"Aaay" (Fonzie, "Happy Days")
    _"And that's the way it is" (Walter Cronkite, "CBS Evening News")
    _"Ask not what your country can do for you ..." (John F. Kennedy)
    _"Baby, you're the greatest" (Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden, "The Honeymooners")
    _"Bam!" (Emeril Lagasse, "Emeril Live")
    _"Book 'em, Danno" (Steve McGarrett, "Hawaii Five-O")
    _"Come on down!" (Johnny Olson, "The Price is Right")
    _"Danger, Will Robinson" (Robot, "Lost in Space")
    _"De plane! De plane!" (Tattoo, "Fantasy Island")
    _"Denny Crane" (Denny Crane, "Boston Legal")
    _"Do you believe in miracles?" (Al Michaels, 1980 Winter Olympics)
    _"D'oh!" (Homer Simpson, "The Simpsons")

    _"Don't make me angry ..." (David Banner, "The Incredible Hulk")
    _"Dyn-o-mite" (J.J., "Good Times")
    _"Elizabeth, I'm coming!" (Fred Sanford, "Sanford and Son")
    _"Gee, Mrs. Cleaver ..." (Eddie Haskell, "Leave it to Beaver")
    _"God'll get you for that" (Maude, "Maude")
    _"Good grief" (Charlie Brown, "Peanuts" specials)
    _"Good night, and good luck" (Edward R. Murrow, "See It Now")
    _"Good night, John Boy" ("The Waltons")
    _"Have you no sense of decency?" (Joseph Welch to Sen. McCarthy)
    _"Heh heh" (Beavis and Butt-head, "Beavis and Butthead")
    _"Here it is, your moment of Zen" ( Jon Stewart, "The Daily Show")
    _"Here's Johnny!" ( Ed McMahon, "The Tonight Show")
    _"Hey now!" (Hank Kingsley, "The Larry Sanders Show")
    _"Hey hey hey!" (Dwayne Nelson, "What's Happening!!")
    _"Hey hey hey!" (Fat Albert, "Fat Albert")
    _"Holy (whatever), Batman!" (Robin, "Batman")
    _"Holy crap!" (Frank Barone, "Everybody Loves Raymond")
    _"Homey don't play that!" (Homey the Clown, "In Living Color")
    _"How sweet it is!" (Jackie Gleason, "The Jackie Gleason Show")
    _"How you doin'?" (Joey Tribbiani, "Friends")
    _"I can't believe I ate the whole thing" (Alka Seltzer ad)
    _"I know nothing!" (Sgt. Schultz, "Hogan's Heroes")
    _"I love it when a plan comes together" (Hannibal, "The A-Team")
    _"I want my MTV!" (MTV ad)
    _"I'm Larry, this is my brother Darryl ..." (Larry, "Newhart")
    _"I'm not a crook ..." ( Richard Nixon)
    _"I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV" (Vicks Formula 44 ad)
    _"I'm Rick James, bitch!" (Dave Chappelle as Rick James, "Chappelle's Show")
    _"Is that your final answer?" ( Regis Philbin, "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire")
    _"It keeps going and going and going ..." (Energizer Batteries ad)
    _"It takes a licking ..." (Timex ad)
    _"Jane, you ignorant slut" ( Dan Aykroyd to Jane Curtin, "Saturday Night Live")
    _"Just one more thing ..." (Columbo, "Columbo")
    _"Let's be careful out there" (Sgt. Esterhaus, "Hill Street Blues")
    _"Let's get ready to rumble!" (Michael Buffer, various sports events)
    _"Live long and prosper" (Spock, "Star Trek")
    _"Makin' whoopie" (Bob Eubanks, "The Newlywed Game")
    _"Mom always liked you best" (Tommy Smothers, "The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour")
    _"Never assume ..." (Felix Unger, "The Odd Couple")
    _"Nip it!" (Barney Fife, "The Andy Griffith Show")
    _"No soup for you!" (The Soup Nazi, "Seinfeld")
    _"Norm!" ("Cheers")
    _"Now cut that out!" (Jack Benny, "The Jack Benny Program")
    _"Oh, my God! They killed Kenny!" (Stan and Kyle, "South Park")
    _"Oh, my nose!" (Marcia Brady, "The Brady Bunch")
    _"One small step for man ..." (Neil Armstrong)
    _"Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon?" (Grey Poupon ad)
    _"Read my lips: No new taxes!" (George H.W. Bush)
    _"Resistance is futile" (Picard as Borg, "Star Trek: The Next Generation")
    _"Say good night, Gracie" (George Burns, "The Burns & Allen Show")
    _"Schwing!" ( Mike Myers and Dana Carvey as Wayne and Garth, "Saturday Night Live")
    _"Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy" (Lloyd Bentsen to Dan Quayle)
    _"Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids" (Trix cereal ad)
    _"Smile, you're on `Candid Camera'" ("Candid Camera")
    _"Sock it to me" ("Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In")
    _"Space, the final frontier ..." (Capt. Kirk, "Star Trek")
    _"Stifle!" (Archie Bunker, "All in the Family")
    _"Suit up!" (Barney Stinson, "How I Met Your Mother")
    _"Tastes great! Less filling!" (Miller Lite beer ad)
    _"Tell me what you don't like about yourself" (Dr. McNamara and Dr. Troy, "Nip/Tuck")
    _"That's hot" ( Paris Hilton, "The Simple Life")
    _"The thrill of victory, the agony of defeat" (Jim McKay, "ABC's Wide World of Sports")
    _"The tribe has spoken" (Jeff Probst, "Survivor")
    _"The truth is out there" (Fox Mulder, "The X-Files")
    _"This is the city ..." (Sgt. Joe Friday, "Dragnet")
    _"Time to make the donuts" ("Dunkin' Donuts" ad)
    _"Two thumbs up" (Siskel & Ebert, "Siskel & Ebert")
    _"Up your nose with a rubber hose" (Vinnie Barbarino, "Welcome Back, Kotter")
    _"We are two wild and crazy guys!" ( Steve Martin and Dan Aykroyd as Czech playboys, "Saturday Night Live")
    _"Welcome to the O.C., bitch" (Luke, "The O.C.")
    _"Well, isn't that special?" (Dana Carvey as the Church Lady, "Saturday Night Live")
    _"We've got a really big show!" (Ed Sullivan, "The Ed Sullivan Show")
    _"Whassup?" (Budweiser ad)
    _"What you see is what you get!" (Geraldine, "The Flip Wilson Show")
    _"Whatchoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" (Arnold Drummond, "Diff'rent Strokes")
    _"Where's the beef?" (Wendy's ad)
    _"Who loves you, baby?" (Kojak, "Kojak")
    _"Would you believe?" (Maxwell Smart, "Get Smart")
    _"Yabba dabba do!" (Fred Flintstone, "The Flintstones")
    _"Yada, yada, yada" ("Seinfeld")
    _"Yeah, that's the ticket" ( Jon Lovitz as the pathological liar, "Saturday Night Live")
    _"You eeeediot!" (Ren, "Ren & Stimpy")
    _"You look mahvelous!" ( Billy Crystal as Fernando, "Saturday Night Live")
    _"You rang?" (Lurch, "The Addams Family")
    _"You're fired!" (Donald Trump, "The Apprentice") _"You've got spunk ..." (Lou Grant, "The Mary Taylor Moore Show")

  3. #3
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    Jane, you ignorant slut. That was so funny. I can imagine real news casters using it.
    fufu's 1337 Journal

    Your diet will set you free.

    I hate exercise, I love training.

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