Thread: Quick, help me not strangle my roommate, please!

Wait a day and see how you feel?

Originally Posted by KelJu

I am in my room shacking right now. This is a last ditch effort to not go in the living room and choke slam that little wormy fuck. He does all kinds of shit the is annoying. I let it go. He crys about my lagging is WoW connection when I want to download a torrent of NLP videos. His stupid fucking dog shits and pisses everywhere. He does stupid fucking impressions of a professor we had. He never stops. They suck and he sucks for doing them. But I never said a word. Thats cool, I'll just move out when the lease is up. So I cook a meal last night, on the george foreman. I grilled a steak, and steamed broccoli and squash. I cleaned up all of the pots and pans, washed the dishes, and used my special brush to clean my george foreman. After all was done all there was there was a plate, half of my steak, and half of my veggies. I could only eat half because of my diet breakdown. So I left my plate of food out over night like I do much of the time. I hate the other half this morning. When I get home form work there is a note on the wall telling me to clean up after myself and that the sponge that I cleaned the kitchen stunk up the apartment. Now he had a fight with is girlfriend last night, and he was all tough and mighty yelling at his girlfriend, because she called him lazy. Well I got him a sweat job working with me making 10 dollars and hour while in college, but he couldn't handle it and quite because somebody at the shop hurt his feelings. He has not been working for over 8 months now. He has only played WoW all day this whole time. Now he got a job yesterday and he is acting like a cry baby because he has to come home tired like his girlfriend and I have been doing for the last 10 years.

The smart thing is to not say a word and just don't talk to him. He only weighs a 130 pounds, and lives off of pb&j sandwiches, so I just might have issues later throwing a 130 pound wuss through a wall. I wish he was closer to my size, then I could do it guilt free. I haven't fought in a long time. I will hurt that boy if I do this. Fuck! Fuck!

And I was having such a great day today. I had a great day, then liek the flip of a switch, I have to be pissed off for the next couple of hours. I think I should take some pills and try to knock myself out.

Just don't go and knock him out. Dude you really are enjoying the NLP stuff eh?

Originally Posted by fufu

Wait a day and see how you feel?

Well I took my sleeping pills an hour early tonight. I took just slightly more than usual and finished off the last of the NyQuil I had in my medicine cabinet. I need to get sleepy real fast.

Originally Posted by BoneCrusher

Just don't go and knock him out. Dude you really are enjoying the NLP stuff eh?

I'm just starting it. I am a quarter of the way through from frogs to princes. There is stuff in that book that I had no fucking idea existed. I have 2 books on NLP and half way done with a torrent of NLP stuff.

NLP MUTHUFUCKER ... DO YOU SPEAK IT?

Originally Posted by KelJu

I'm just starting it. I am a quarter of the way through from frogs to princes. There is stuff in that book that I had no fucking idea existed. I have 2 books on NLP and half way done with a torrent of NLP stuff.

Getting harder and harder for people to bullshit you these days, and you in turn can get your point across to others more and more easily as time goes by.

Tell me some of the stuff you're learned so far ...

And what torrent too btw ... I wanna check that out.

Originally Posted by BoneCrusher

Getting harder and harder for people to bullshit you these days, and you in turn can get your point across to others more and more easily as time goes by.

Tell me some of the stuff you're learned so far ...

I can look at customer's eyes and start trying to follow their brain activities by watching what they do with their eyes while they talk.

Originally Posted by KelJu

I can look at customer's eyes and start trying to follow their brain activities by watching what they do with their eyes while they talk.

And they're clueless ... it's almost like cheating

Why don't you just tell him off? You don't have to do it physically.

just look at everything he does as a chance to study his psychological makeup.

Just go smoke a big bowl.

Change his WOW password and then sell the account.

Haha, thanks everyone for keeping me occupied. I'm over it now. He isn't worth me being angry over. If he pulls this shit again, I am going to tell him what I think rather than being nice about it. The truth hurts, and he will find that out soon if he doesn't wash is vagina and stop being a little bitch.

Pwn that noobs ass.

When downloading a torrent, if you limit the upload to 5kbps or less, his game should not lag. So you wont have to hear him complain about it.

Originally Posted by Steele20

When downloading a torrent, if you limit the upload to 5kbps or less, his game should not lag. So you wont have to hear him complain about it.

I pay $60.00 a month for cable which I don't watch, and internet that I can not use the way I want to. If I wanted to download at 5k, I would pay $15 a month for dial-up service. As a matter of fact, I might just stop paying them for cabel service and cable internet and have my own personal DSL service installed.

Depends on how evil you want to get and how much comp knowledge you have. My personal favorite is to set a default route for any outgoing address to be a gay porn site. Then, you disable their access to change that setting in MMC. Finally, you open both MMC and the registry at the same time - in the registry, you disable MMC - in MMC, you disable the registry.

I like to take my revenge in these subtle more humorous ways

Originally Posted by KelJu

I pay $60.00 a month for cable which I don't watch, and internet that I can not use the way I want to. If I wanted to download at 5k, I would pay $15 a month for dial-up service. As a matter of fact, I might just stop paying them for cabel service and cable internet and have my own personal DSL service installed.

How do the speeds compare? Will you loose out in the download speeds by going to DSL?

Originally Posted by BoneCrusher

How do the speeds compare? Will you loose out in the download speeds by going to DSL?

DSL is probably going to be slower, but at least I won't have to listen to the fucker when when I am downloading torrents.

Originally Posted by KelJu

DSL is probably going to be slower, but at least I won't have to listen to the fucker when when I am downloading torrents.

I think it depends on how old the cable lines are..

When I went to college the first apartment complex I lived in had just been built and the connection was great. Then I moved to an older part of town and the same service was literally a 1/3 slower. Same company, same modem, same computer. That was the diagnosis.

Some areas offer an expanded bandwidth DSL service. We have that at my office and it's considerably faster. A bit more expensive, but it was worth it IMO. They didn't offer it to us until our computer guy told us to ask for it.

Something to check into at least.

I take it you can own his ass in a physical confrontation, yes?

Then do whatever the fuck you want and don't worry about it.

Originally Posted by Pianomahnn

I take it you can own his ass in a physical confrontation, yes?

Then do whatever the fuck you want and don't worry about it.

From what is sounds like, he's a foot taller and 100 lbs heavier.

That NLP will really pay off when you have to believably say, "Why no officer, I don't where the wormy fuck is..."

What's this NLP shit?

Originally Posted by fletcher6490

What's this NLP shit?

Neuro Linguistic Programming/Processing.

Originally Posted by ReproMan

From what is sounds like, he's a foot taller and 100 lbs heavier.

So much bigger it would be an embarrassment to be known for having hit the the little 'tard.

Kelju maybe if you wrap yourself in duck tape and leave only one arm loose, THEN you could just bitch slap him around the room a lil bit and sort him out.

You gotta look at the imagery of that to really appreciate the concept.