Thread: If you could ask God 5 questions

when i die, everything will be revealed to me.. so i wont need to ask any questions.

1 - Why are the male genitals so godawful-looking?
2 - Where did all my pens go?
3 - Is Frank Zappa here?
4 - Just how did the universe come about?
5 - How do you get your beard so shiny?

#1 i'd ask him if my kids were going to have long and happy lives

if the answer is yes that's it. if the answer is no then question #2 would be

"how would you like your remains displayed?"

I think at first I would only have one question - How can I best serve you now?

1. Do you really care what we were/are doing down there?

2. What happens now?

3. Were Adam & Eve really the first people?

4. Where's this garden?

5. Who's right Newtonian Physics or Quantum Mechanics?

1. Did you say oops when you finished making us?

1.Are you really god?
2. Really?
3. Are you sure?
4. How do you know?
5. Wanna go for a drink?

1- Why don't you show yourself, and I don't in someone's soup.
2-Why is there war? What happened to "Thou Shalt Not Kill"? Why are there so many wars in Your Name?
3-Why does Adam and his crew get to livee to 800 plus years of age and the rest of us get but only 90 years tops..
4-Why do the innocent suffer?
5-Why is it that when I crap I wipe my ass 20 times I still have crap stains on my undies, but the damn cat and dog take wipeless shits?
That one pisses me off.

Originally Posted by min0 lee

5-Why is it that when I crap I wipe my ass 20 times I still have crap stains on my undies, but the damn cat and dog take wipeless shits?
That one pisses me off.

no shit, eh?

What?
When?
Where?
Why?
How?

Originally Posted by Burner02

no shit, eh?

I shit you not.

Originally Posted by maniclion

What?
When?
Where?
Why?
How?

Approves!

Originally Posted by Jo-Anna

I think at first I would only have one question - How can I best serve you now?

Make him a sandwhich?

1. What is your favorite word?

2. What turns you on?

3. What is your favorite curse word?

4. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

5. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear yourself say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

I just did a IronMag search and just my luck I found God, he was here the whole time and you wacky folks didn't even bother to do a simple search.

Well anyway, I'll be right back. I'm going to be busy copy/pasting all these questions and forwarding them to God.

If you rather PM him yourself here's his link.--> http://www.ironmagazineforums.com/members/god.html

GOD
The Almighty Deity

He's not online now so it may take a while.
Hmm....he looks white.

Originally Posted by min0 lee

If you could ask God or whatever god you believe in ( Just go along with it) 5 questions, what would they be?
By the way this is assuming you're dead.

Why did you never mention anything about astronomy or worlds beyond Earth in the Bible?

Why did the path I walk have to be filled with so many people that I've loved more than I love myself, and had to say farewell to?

What exactly WAS MinO?

Why did you create me?
What do you want from me?
Will you hurt me for not doing it?
Did you put some sort of karma system into effect when you created humans?
Where does belly button lent come from?

1. For the money?
2. For the show?
3. To get ready?
4. Now go?
5. Cat go?

Originally Posted by KelJu

Where does belly button lent come from?

Only a hairy man would ask this, so only a hairy man can answer it.

Its from your teeshirt, the hair around your button grabs the fibers and pulls em in

Like that pit creature from star wars.

OMNOMNOM

#1: Why did you take Heath Leger?!

haha kidding
On a serious note
#1: Did I actually find my soul mate, or did I settle for less?
#2: Did you ever show yourself to me at one point while I was on Earth?
#3: Did I make you proud?
#4: Besides your Saints, which peoepl were you most proud of making?
#5: Does Everyone really have their own guardian angel?

Originally Posted by Yanick

4. Where's this garden?

Iraq/Iran

That general area.

Originally Posted by FishOrCutBait

Why did you never mention anything about astronomy or worlds beyond Earth in the Bible?

Why did the path I walk have to be filled with so many people that I've loved more than I love myself, and had to say farewell to?

What exactly WAS MinO?

PS 8:3
deut 14:9

Originally Posted by FishOrCutBait

Iraq/Iran

That general area.

and why there?

1.) can i see the creation and the earthly timeline?
2.) whats next?
my last 3 questions i hold in reserve and will have to think about

#1 Could you do me a big favor and smite all those fucking looney christians who told me I was going to hell for not believing everything they say?

Originally Posted by FishOrCutBait

Iraq/Iran

That general area.

Okay, sweet. Now Bush's policies make sense to me

I've heard that before re:the Garden of Eden being around there, but whats the Christians' explanation of what happened to it?

Originally Posted by Yanick

Okay, sweet. Now Bush's policies make sense to me

I've heard that before re:the Garden of Eden being around there, but whats the Christians' explanation of what happened to it?

Presumably deteriorated over time. There is no biblical explanation for it to the best of my knowledge.

Bush has no clue where the Garden of Eden is, dont worry, haha.