Sex questions

**dg806** · 08-21-2002, 01:13 PM

1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
A. Lovemaking.
B. Screwing.
C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.

2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:
A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship.
B. Your blood-test results.
C. Five tequila slammers.

3. You time your orgasm so that:
A. Your partner climaxes first.
B. You both climax simultaneously.
C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.

4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
A. Healthy, creative love-play.
B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to.
C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.

5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:
A. The best part of the experience.
B. The second best part of the experience.
C. $100 extra.

6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.
B. Not a problem, she can join your gym.
C. A conservative estimate.

7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:
A. A myth.
B. An oxymoron.
C. A moron.

8. Foreplay is to sex as:
A. An appetizer is to entree.
B. Primer is to paint.
C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.

9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
A. "I hope we can still be friends."
B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep."
C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU."

10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy.
B. Is uptight and a waste of time.
C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.

**Prince** · 08-21-2002, 02:50 PM

Burner02 · 07-26-2007, 05:00 PM

just 'casue it's a slow posting day...and this was funny...

Little Wing · 07-26-2007, 05:10 PM

1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:

C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town.

2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared:
.
C. Five tequila slammers.

3. You time your orgasm so that:

C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center.

4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:

C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.

5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is:

C. $100 extra.

6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:

C. A conservative estimate.

7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:

C. A moron.

8. Foreplay is to sex as:

C. A long line is to an amusement park ride.

9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?

C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU."

10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:

C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place.

AKIRA · 07-26-2007, 05:12 PM

All the Cs are punchlines, m'lady.

Little Wing · 07-26-2007, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AKIRA

All the Cs are punchlines, m'lady.

i knew that :shh:

fufu · 07-26-2007, 06:09 PM

lawlz, nice!

tallcall · 07-26-2007, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dg806

4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
A. Healthy, creative love-play.
B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to.
C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about.

You forgot a choice: Not the kind of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to see when she comes home and you're making love on the floor with the guy next door.

I apologize,it was supposed to be funny, but it doesn't make any sense. I was just trying to add a often neglected dimension to the whole thing (I know this kind of thing happens sometimes).

Burner02 · 07-27-2007, 09:30 AM

yeah...sorry TC...judges call on your input:
umm...hmmm...ok..ok...hhmmmm....
ok...unanimous: not funny

tallcall · 07-27-2007, 01:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burner02

yeah...sorry TC...judges call on your input:
umm...hmmm...ok..ok...hhmmmm....
ok...unanimous: not funny

That's it, I am filing an appeal!

Burner02 · 07-27-2007, 02:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tallcall

You forgot a choice: Not the kind of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to see when she comes home and you're making love on the floor with the guy next door.

I apologize,it was supposed to be funny, but it doesn't make any sense. I was just trying to add a often neglected dimension to the whole thing (I know this kind of thing happens sometimes).

it does have kind of an American Dream quality to it...but you know how that ended....

katt · 07-27-2007, 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burner02

it does have kind of an American Dream quality to it...but you know how that ended....

It ended with Broke Back Mountain

Burner02 · 07-27-2007, 04:09 PM

Broke Back IM?

katt · 07-27-2007, 04:10 PM

Ok, that's better

DOMS · 07-27-2007, 04:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burner02

Broke Back IM?

Tab A, slot C?

katt · 07-27-2007, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DOMS

Tab A, slot C?

Burner02 · 07-27-2007, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DOMS

Tab A, slot C?

not this boy's pintu!
(The Runaround)

DOMS · 07-27-2007, 05:35 PM

The Rundown.

tallcall · 07-27-2007, 06:09 PM

Ok, you all lost me, what are you talking about?

BiggT · 11-14-2007, 11:44 PM

"C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town. "

funniest shit ever!

TrojanMan60563 · 11-17-2007, 09:31 AM

How did this turn into a gay thing? Whats next.....

When your girlfriend doesn't want to put out at night you:

a. tell her you love her and go to sleep
b. agree to just cuddle her all night
c. sneak out and go to boys town
d. wait until she falls asleep and superman that ho

08-21-2002, 01:13 PM	#1
dg806 Guardian of The Homeland Super Moderator Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Charlotte NC Posts: 18,197	Sex questions 1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as: A. Lovemaking. B. Screwing. C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town. 2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared: A. Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship. B. Your blood-test results. C. Five tequila slammers. 3. You time your orgasm so that: A. Your partner climaxes first. B. You both climax simultaneously. C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center. 4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is: A. Healthy, creative love-play. B. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would agree to. C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about. 5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is: A. The best part of the experience. B. The second best part of the experience. C. $100 extra. 6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is: A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her. B. Not a problem, she can join your gym. C. A conservative estimate. 7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is: A. A myth. B. An oxymoron. C. A moron. 8. Foreplay is to sex as: A. An appetizer is to entree. B. Primer is to paint. C. A long line is to an amusement park ride. 9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship? A. "I hope we can still be friends." B. "I'm not in right now, please leave a message at the beep." C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU." 10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate: A. Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy. B. Is uptight and a waste of time. C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place. 1-Andro Rx Pro-hormone

08-21-2002, 02:50 PM	#2
Prince IronMagLabs Owner Administrator Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Colorado Posts: 37,412 Photos: 356	BOARD SPONSORS: MassNutrition.com - Discount Supplement Superstore IronMagLabs.com - Bodybuilding Nutrition AlltheWhey.com - Bulk Protein Powders & Supplements CEMProducts.com - Research Chemicals & Supplements MusclesProd.com - Steroids, Bodybuilding & Training Blog Maximizer.com - Maximum Strength for Maximum Performance MikeGetsRipped.com - The Original 'Get Ripped' Blog ProteinRoutine.com - Experiments in Healthy Living Follow on Twitter Join Facebook Group Befriend on Myspace

07-26-2007, 05:00 PM	#3
Burner02 Super Hero in Training Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Kabul, Afghanistan Posts: 29,648	just 'casue it's a slow posting day...and this was funny... Success leaves clues. People who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is what you are doing NOW to solve our problem THERE IS NO TOMORROW! - Appollo Creed

07-26-2007, 05:10 PM	#4
Little Wing Mommmmmm, turn it down!!! Elite Member Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: United States Posts: 23,758 Photos: 191	1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as: C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town. 2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you've both shared: . C. Five tequila slammers. 3. You time your orgasm so that: C. You don't miss ESPN Sports Center. 4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is: C. Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend needs to ever find out about. 5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you've just had sex with is: C. $100 extra. 6. Your wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is: C. A conservative estimate. 7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is: C. A moron. 8. Foreplay is to sex as: C. A long line is to an amusement park ride. 9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship? C. "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population, YOU." 10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate: C. Shouldn't have sat next to you on the bus in the first place. "MUSCLE IS TRULY GUARANTEED IF YOU WILL HONESTLY work out to BE YOUR VERY BEST - GO FOR IT!!! BECAUSE YOU CAN!!!!!! Take Care, John H."

07-26-2007, 05:12 PM	#5
AKIRA I am Rollo Tomassee.. Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Outside the box Posts: 8,787 Photos: 3	All the Cs are punchlines, m'lady. 6' 209lbs (8/16) Bench 365 (12/3) Weighted Pullups 80lbs 3x3 (3/19) Squat 370 Deadlift after herniation 385lbs 3x3 (3/17) NASM certified 2/06 Journal

07-26-2007, 06:09 PM	#7
fufu fiendish thingy Elite Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 16,732 Photos: 8	lawlz, nice! fufu's 1337 Journal Your diet will set you free.

07-27-2007, 09:30 AM	#9
Burner02 Super Hero in Training Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Kabul, Afghanistan Posts: 29,648	yeah...sorry TC...judges call on your input: umm...hmmm...ok..ok...hhmmmm.... ok...unanimous: not funny Success leaves clues. People who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is what you are doing NOW to solve our problem THERE IS NO TOMORROW! - Appollo Creed

07-27-2007, 04:09 PM	#13
Burner02 Super Hero in Training Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Kabul, Afghanistan Posts: 29,648	Broke Back IM? Success leaves clues. People who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is what you are doing NOW to solve our problem THERE IS NO TOMORROW! - Appollo Creed

07-27-2007, 04:10 PM	#14
katt Registered User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Pacific Northwest Posts: 4,576 Photos: 37	Ok, that's better

07-27-2007, 05:35 PM	#18
DOMS Metrosexual Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 22,092 Photos: 1	The Rundown.

07-27-2007, 06:09 PM	#19
tallcall The Evil Director is IN Elite Member Join Date: May 2007 Location: Orlando, FL Posts: 2,897 Photos: 12	Ok, you all lost me, what are you talking about? First Place Florida State Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Champions - My guys - "Team Brotherhood"

11-14-2007, 11:44 PM	#20
BiggT Registered User Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Orange County Posts: 151 Photos: 5	"C. Taking the pigskin bus to tuna town. " funniest shit ever! I do what I do because I love it

11-17-2007, 09:31 AM	#21
TrojanMan60563 Registered User Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: The U-S of A Posts: 3,393 Photos: 1	How did this turn into a gay thing? Whats next..... When your girlfriend doesn't want to put out at night you: a. tell her you love her and go to sleep b. agree to just cuddle her all night c. sneak out and go to boys town d. wait until she falls asleep and superman that ho

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