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If Men Answered Advice Columns

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  1. #1
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    If Men Answered Advice Columns

    IF MEN ANSWERED ADVICE COULUMNS!!!

    >Q: My husband wants a threesome with my best friend and me.

    >A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that there is only one of you, he can only settle for the next best thing, your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can only bring you closer together. Why not get some of your old college roommates involved too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with your friends without you. If your still not sure then just perform oral sex on him and cook him a nice meal while you think about it.

    >Q: My husband continuously asks me to perform oral sex on him.

    >A: Do it! Semen can help you lose weight and gives a great glow to your skin. Interestingly enough, men know this. His offer to allow you to perform oral sex on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you. The best thing to do is to thank him by performing oral sex twice a day: then cook him a nice meal.

    >Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

    >A: This is perfectly natural behavior, and it should be encouraged. The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember, nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house too!!). Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his stable home. The best thing to do when he returns home is for you and your best friend to perform oral sex on him. Then cook him a nice meal.

    >Q: My husband doesn't know where my clitoris is.

    >A: Your clitoris is of no concern to your husband. If you must mess with it, do it on your own time or ask your best friend to help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and present it to your husband on his birthday. To ease your selfish guilt, perform oral sex on him and cook him a delicious meal.

    >Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

    >A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. Sex should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as much as you should. He should never have to work to get you in the mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by performing oral sex on him and cooking him a nice meal.

    >Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one.

    >A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.
    A chic on the move.

  2. #2
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  3. #3
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    is this a suggestion or is there a problem w/ this
    - "If I ever run into Dave Grohl, I'm gonna kick his fuqqin' ass... because he sucks and he wrote this cheese-dick song for Ozzy that I have to fuqqin' play on and I'll never forgive him for that. Foo Fighters is a fuqqin' candy-ass girl band but you've got that mother-fuqqer submitting songs [for the album], and those douchebags from the Offspring, too."
    "...Dave Grohl? Fuq Dave Grohl! ...you're getting this guy to write songs for Ozzy? Just because he played drums for fuqqing Sh!tvana?"
    --- Zakk Wylde ---
    ---Dimebag Darrel RIP---

  4. #4
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    Re: If Men Answered Advice Columns

    Originally posted by CLPgold
    >Q: My husband always has an orgasm then rolls over and goes to sleep without giving me one.

    >A: I'm not sure I understand the problem. Perhaps you've forgotten to cook him a nice meal.

    Win!!!

    Where's my pot pie, biotch?

  5. #5
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    CLP you shoud send this out to all women so that us men will be completely understood. I see absolutely nothing wrong with the advise that was given in the above "advise".

  6. #6
    What tan line?


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    I must add that there are some of us that find foreplay truely an art. The longer the better. I guess that those of us like this are in some fashion more in tune with our feminine side. Although this is rare in the male we do exist. Bring on the toys

  7. #7
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  8. #8
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    Great advice I think I will e-mail the wife this page. LOL!!!
    "Got MILK"
    Where's Your Mustache LOL

  9. #9
    The little feller


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    lmfbo quallty hehe

  10. #10
    Believe, Achieve, Succeed


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    Just like "GOLD";

    Damn Fine, Damn Fine!!!!!
    Drama is the result of an attempt
    to find wholeness & success
    in the midst of forces that have been
    birthed in chaos and nurtured in confusion.
    -- No More Drama

  11. #11
    Here i am again!
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    buAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHHHAHAHAHAH!!!!


    ah man! thas funny. crap! i just washed these boxers!

    ¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸© The trouble with life is there’s no background music ©¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸
    ¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸© Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them ©¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸
    ¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸© God must love stupid people, he made so many of them ©¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸
    ¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸© Life ain't short, your just dead for too frick'n dam long! ©¸,ø¤°`°¤ø,¸

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