If you don't mind...

Edolie · 04-14-2008, 05:46 PM

I am in need of sex advice.

As odd as it may seem, I am a 24 year old virgin. Yes, I've waited that long for Mister Right and have finally found him. Alas, many problems have gotten in the way of us consummating our relationship...

The reason that has come up most often is that he is intimidated by my virginity. I don't get that, but...okay. Then he said that he has finally started to grow as a person and wants to find out who he really is. I pegged that one as bull shit pretty quick and it hasn't come up since. A few nights ago I gave him a blow job and we started to get pretty frisky. When it came to intercourse, he stopped and said that he doesn't have a condom with him and went on to talk about an ex-girlfriend getting pregnant and having miscarriage, or what she claims was a miscarriage. A completely understandable reason. I sure as hell don't want kids yet. I lost my train of thought...there is always some reason for not having sex. Most of the time it's a new reason or me being a virgin.

Anyway, he has recently started talking about me taking birth control. Before we dated, I normally hung out with him and a friend of his. Their conversations usually consisted of politics, sex, or religion. One of their sex talks included how horrible condoms are and that he can't get off at all when he's using them. So, I'm extremely tempted to try birth control to see if he'll jump right in with no reserves. However, I have a major fear of doctors and I react badly to most medications. I can't take something for a head ache without having strange or horrible results.

Sorry, this is so long, but there are three more problems. He has a huge penis. I haven't seen many or touched any before him, but I was seriously shocked the first time I saw it. Considering the fact that I've never had anything bigger than a tampon in me, it is a tad terrifying.

The biggest problem, I think, is that he hates sex. I found this out a few days ago. He had talked about how horrible all of his relationships were before we got together, but there has got to be more to it than I realize. The majority of his relationships before were based on sex. According to him, they had sex all the time and he never really found it enjoyable. Plus he is a very romantic person or used to be. He thought that sex was the ultimate way of emotional bonding and what not. Now he thinks that is bull shit. He thinks of masturbation as just a normal thing, like eating and breathing. He does it to balance his hormones and moves on. I don't mind him masturbating all the time, but when it comes to actual sex, I have to disagree with him. I didn't stay a virgin so that things would be this way.

Okay, the third problem. He has a hard time reaching an orgasm and had had a lot of sex before having is first one. I guess he usually runs out of steam before he can get there and, thus far, I've run out of steam as well while trying to help him get there. I think that it has to do with his medication, but it could be psychological. Although we aren't having intercourse right now, I would like to help him with this. Any techniques that I could try while we're messing around would be great. He's given me a few directions like where he likes to be licked and touched, and that he likes it "rough". I tried to get a bit more rough when I was giving him a blow job, but I didn't really know in what way he meant.

chiquita6683 · 04-14-2008, 05:55 PM

What medication is he taking?

NFOMan · 04-15-2008, 08:09 PM

[quote=Edolie;1768701]I am in need of sex advice.

As odd as it may seem, I am a 24 year old virgin. Yes, I've waited that long for Mister Right and have finally found him. Alas, many problems have gotten in the way of us consummating our relationship...---------------

Feminina: Yet rid of this jerk. Find yourself a man who can appreciate you. (In my regular jock opinion)

Irons77 · 04-15-2008, 08:32 PM

You have problems girl

Edolie · 04-17-2008, 04:32 AM

Quote:

What medication is he taking?

He's taking zoloft and some sort of anxiety medication.

Quote:

Feminina: Yet rid of this jerk. Find yourself a man who can appreciate you. (In my regular jock opinion)

I couldn't possibly leave him because of this. Hell, I can't think of a single reason to leave him. He respects me, treats me like a goddess, adores me and tells me every day, has managed to make me open up (something no one else had managed to do before), and so much more. One can't just give up on a relationship because they've hit a rough spot. We'll eventually work this out...I'm just trying to find a way to make it easier and come about much quicker. I'd be a liar if I said that I don't get extremely horny every now and then. I could go out and find someone who would have sex with me with no problem, but it would be just that...sex. I'm not interested in sex; I want much more than that and I think that he's the only person who could give me that...he just can't yet.

Quote:

You have problems girl

*sigh* Yeah...

Irons77 · 04-17-2008, 08:01 AM

How old are you? Maybe you don't turn him on like that

tomuchgear · 04-17-2008, 08:28 AM

damn irons thats cold. some things take time, and medications can really screw with people.

Irons77 · 04-17-2008, 08:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tomuchgear

damn irons thats cold. some things take time, and medications can really screw with people.

Why would you want to be with someone that their meds screw them up. Apparently it's a problem or she wouldn't be posting it, right?

shiznit2169 · 04-17-2008, 09:54 AM

Check your PM Edolie

NeilPearson · 04-17-2008, 12:10 PM

I agree with NFOMan. Any guy that makes excuses for not having sex with his 24 year old girlfriend doesn't deserve a girlfriend.

He doesn't like sex? He obviously has issues if he is on medication like that. Why would you even want to be involved with someone like that?

You guys are basically just friends, date other guys while keeping him around as a friend if you must. Personally I wouldn't have anything to do with him though.

It sounds like you have absolutely NO chemistry together or he would be banging you already.

Time to move on...

NeilPearson · 04-17-2008, 12:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edolie

Hell, I can't think of a single reason to leave him.

Not having sex with you is a huge, huge reason.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edolie

He respects me, treats me like a goddess, adores me and tells me every day, has managed to make me open up (something no one else had managed to do before), and so much more. One can't just give up on a relationship because they've hit a rough spot.

Relationships don't get easier. If you start off this way, it's not good. Don't try and force the relationship if there is no attraction on his side (or if he is completely nuts which I suspect is the case)

tomuchgear · 04-17-2008, 12:45 PM

the only reason i would say takes time when i shatterd my ankle/foot pain killers made me so doped up i couldnt talk. also my wife got on some birth control that killed her sex drive a few years back. i didnt run around on her i waited to find out what the hell was going on. if his meds are the problem then he needs to tell the doc to put him on some thing diffrent. now if it aint meds kick his ass to the curb.

tomuchgear · 04-17-2008, 12:46 PM

correction couldnt talk straight much like my typing.

NeilPearson · 04-17-2008, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tomuchgear

the only reason i would say takes time when i shatterd my ankle/foot pain killers made me so doped up i couldnt talk. also my wife got on some birth control that killed her sex drive a few years back. i didnt run around on her i waited to find out what the hell was going on. if his meds are the problem then he needs to tell the doc to put him on some thing diffrent. now if it aint meds kick his ass to the curb.

I don't care if it is his meds...

"He's taking zoloft and some sort of anxiety medication"

Actually, taking zoloft and anxiety medication is reason enough for me not to get serious with someone. Why would I want to get serious with someone that is all messed up and crazy?

I could see hanging out, having sex with someone like this and never letting it get serious just because sex with crazy people can be fun but if they are crazy and not putting out? Well, there is no reason to keep them around.

tomuchgear · 04-17-2008, 01:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NeilPearson

I don't care if it is his meds...

"He's taking zoloft and some sort of anxiety medication"

Actually, taking zoloft and anxiety medication is reason enough for me not to get serious with someone. Why would I want to get serious with someone that is all messed up and crazy?

I could see hanging out, having sex with someone like this and never letting it get serious just because sex with crazy people can be fun but if they are crazy and not putting out? Well, there is no reason to keep them around.

ya good point i didnt pay attention to the meds. people that need that much can get a little freaky. run away just be friends and move on.

Gazhole · 04-17-2008, 03:55 PM

I dont think the meds are effecting his sex drive, because she said he jerks himself off all the time.

Seriously, i would just sit him down and ask him what the fuck is going on. Straight out.

Edolie · 04-17-2008, 06:46 PM

Well, there is a lot that I haven't mentioned...he doesn't like just anyone knowing, but I'm sure that none of you know him anyway. He has severe OCD (obsessive Compulsive Disorder), which is why he takes the zoloft and anxiety meds. It slows down his train of thought and makes it easier for him to make it through the day.

And it isn't because he's not attracted to me...which I thought was the reason for a while, so I just up and asked him. Then there's the fact that I can make him get a boner without trying, he just stops things before they get too far. He was all over me when we first got together and then he started applying his OCD stuff to our relationship...like kissing me a specific number of times...stuff like that.

Since I first met him, he has changed a lot. He doesn't do as much of the OCD stuff as he used to and has started to travel again...which hasn't happened in around three years.

Beh, there is way to much to describe it on here. I only bothered because you don't just throw something like this away because of sex problems. We do have chemistry, we love spending time together...he can't stand being away from me for one night. If there is such a thing as true love, then this is it. I don't want to get all gushy, but that's just it. Before, I thought that I would never meet someone. Sure, he's odd, but he is an amazing person.

Anyway, we got into a bit of a spat because he started kissing and groping me when I actually didn't want him to. I said, "You don't want to do that any other time...why now?" and it just continued from there. Later on he said that he was sorry for being an asshole and said, "I'm scared, that's the only reason." My anger hadn't yet worn off at that point, so I couldn't make myself ask him what he meant, but there ya go. I'll probably ask him later tonight when we get home.

Well, this post was all over the place...I'm not so sure that it made any sense. Sorry.

Irons77 · 04-17-2008, 07:59 PM

Are you sure he is not gay, blaming it on the meds

NeverEnough · 04-17-2008, 09:35 PM

are you positive hes not makin all of this up to get in your pants...i dont know but it sounds like he is just using a ton of lines...i dont like sex...i dont like condoms...you make meopen up...blah blah...usually all that=bull shit

danzik17 · 04-17-2008, 11:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NeverEnough

are you positive hes not makin all of this up to get in your pants...i dont know but it sounds like he is just using a ton of lines...i dont like sex...i dont like condoms...you make meopen up...blah blah...usually all that=bull shit

QUIET YOU. You have violated man law #64. Thou shalt not divulge man secrets.

Gazhole · 04-18-2008, 06:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by danzik17

QUIET YOU. You have violated man law #64. Thou shalt not divulge man secrets.

Its a very complicated code. We dont even know the rules ourselves.

Merkaba · 04-22-2008, 04:54 AM

This guy sounds like a fucking pussy. Get rid of him. Period. guys quit acting like you fucking care. Kissasses!!

min0 lee · 04-22-2008, 05:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shiznit2169

Check your PM Edolie

min0 lee · 04-22-2008, 05:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edolie

I am in need of sex advice.

Just curious, how did you come across this site?
Is this an alias? Not that it matters but it is odd that this is your first post here.
Or is a member here with the "problem" your boyfriend.

You can tell us....I'll take a guess...

which IM member has a erection prob.....it's Akira!!!

No wait, could it be Gazhole...

the switch from goats to human could pose a problem..

Or is it Danny81.....nah, he's into the black Bukakke thang...

min0 lee · 04-22-2008, 05:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edolie

I couldn't possibly leave him because of this. Hell, I can't think of a single reason to leave him. He respects me, treats me like a goddess, adores me and tells me every day, has managed to make me open up

He sounds like he's going to be your best friend, sex may ruin that relationship.

04-14-2008, 05:46 PM	#1
Edolie Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: US Posts: 3	If you don't mind... BODYBUILDING SUPPLEMENTS High Quality Supplements For Bodybuilders and Athletes. www.ironmaglabs.com I am in need of sex advice. As odd as it may seem, I am a 24 year old virgin. Yes, I've waited that long for Mister Right and have finally found him. Alas, many problems have gotten in the way of us consummating our relationship... The reason that has come up most often is that he is intimidated by my virginity. I don't get that, but...okay. Then he said that he has finally started to grow as a person and wants to find out who he really is. I pegged that one as bull shit pretty quick and it hasn't come up since. A few nights ago I gave him a blow job and we started to get pretty frisky. When it came to intercourse, he stopped and said that he doesn't have a condom with him and went on to talk about an ex-girlfriend getting pregnant and having miscarriage, or what she claims was a miscarriage. A completely understandable reason. I sure as hell don't want kids yet. I lost my train of thought...there is always some reason for not having sex. Most of the time it's a new reason or me being a virgin. Anyway, he has recently started talking about me taking birth control. Before we dated, I normally hung out with him and a friend of his. Their conversations usually consisted of politics, sex, or religion. One of their sex talks included how horrible condoms are and that he can't get off at all when he's using them. So, I'm extremely tempted to try birth control to see if he'll jump right in with no reserves. However, I have a major fear of doctors and I react badly to most medications. I can't take something for a head ache without having strange or horrible results. Sorry, this is so long, but there are three more problems. He has a huge penis. I haven't seen many or touched any before him, but I was seriously shocked the first time I saw it. Considering the fact that I've never had anything bigger than a tampon in me, it is a tad terrifying. The biggest problem, I think, is that he hates sex. I found this out a few days ago. He had talked about how horrible all of his relationships were before we got together, but there has got to be more to it than I realize. The majority of his relationships before were based on sex. According to him, they had sex all the time and he never really found it enjoyable. Plus he is a very romantic person or used to be. He thought that sex was the ultimate way of emotional bonding and what not. Now he thinks that is bull shit. He thinks of masturbation as just a normal thing, like eating and breathing. He does it to balance his hormones and moves on. I don't mind him masturbating all the time, but when it comes to actual sex, I have to disagree with him. I didn't stay a virgin so that things would be this way. Okay, the third problem. He has a hard time reaching an orgasm and had had a lot of sex before having is first one. I guess he usually runs out of steam before he can get there and, thus far, I've run out of steam as well while trying to help him get there. I think that it has to do with his medication, but it could be psychological. Although we aren't having intercourse right now, I would like to help him with this. Any techniques that I could try while we're messing around would be great. He's given me a few directions like where he likes to be licked and touched, and that he likes it "rough". I tried to get a bit more rough when I was giving him a blow job, but I didn't really know in what way he meant.

04-15-2008, 08:09 PM	#3
NFOMan Member Elite Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: OK Posts: 116	Lady, wait for the right guy [quote=Edolie;1768701]I am in need of sex advice. As odd as it may seem, I am a 24 year old virgin. Yes, I've waited that long for Mister Right and have finally found him. Alas, many problems have gotten in the way of us consummating our relationship...--------------- Feminina: Yet rid of this jerk. Find yourself a man who can appreciate you. (In my regular jock opinion)

04-15-2008, 08:32 PM	#4
Irons77 Training like a bitch Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 628	You have problems girl
	Soreness is weakness exiting the body.

04-17-2008, 08:28 AM	#7
tomuchgear gettin there Elite Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: ohio Posts: 977 Photos: 2	damn irons thats cold. some things take time, and medications can really screw with people.
	"im going to go inject syntherol in my ass see if it gets me a bubble butt" i bet in the world you live in every one is a pony, eats rainbows, and craps butterflies.

04-17-2008, 09:54 AM	#9
shiznit2169 flawless Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 3,964 Photos: 3	Check your PM Edolie
	My Journal

04-14-2008, 05:55 PM	#2
chiquita6683 Senior Member Elite Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Jacksonville, FL Posts: 768 Photos: 1	What medication is he taking?

04-17-2008, 08:01 AM	#6
Irons77 Training like a bitch Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 628	How old are you? Maybe you don't turn him on like that
	Soreness is weakness exiting the body.

04-17-2008, 12:10 PM	#10
NeilPearson Registered User Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Phoenix, AZ Posts: 1,994	I agree with NFOMan. Any guy that makes excuses for not having sex with his 24 year old girlfriend doesn't deserve a girlfriend. He doesn't like sex? He obviously has issues if he is on medication like that. Why would you even want to be involved with someone like that? You guys are basically just friends, date other guys while keeping him around as a friend if you must. Personally I wouldn't have anything to do with him though. It sounds like you have absolutely NO chemistry together or he would be banging you already. Time to move on...

04-17-2008, 12:45 PM	#12
tomuchgear gettin there Elite Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: ohio Posts: 977 Photos: 2	the only reason i would say takes time when i shatterd my ankle/foot pain killers made me so doped up i couldnt talk. also my wife got on some birth control that killed her sex drive a few years back. i didnt run around on her i waited to find out what the hell was going on. if his meds are the problem then he needs to tell the doc to put him on some thing diffrent. now if it aint meds kick his ass to the curb.
	"im going to go inject syntherol in my ass see if it gets me a bubble butt" i bet in the world you live in every one is a pony, eats rainbows, and craps butterflies.

04-17-2008, 12:46 PM	#13
tomuchgear gettin there Elite Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: ohio Posts: 977 Photos: 2	correction couldnt talk straight much like my typing.
	"im going to go inject syntherol in my ass see if it gets me a bubble butt" i bet in the world you live in every one is a pony, eats rainbows, and craps butterflies.

04-17-2008, 06:46 PM	#17
Edolie Registered User Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: US Posts: 3	Well, there is a lot that I haven't mentioned...he doesn't like just anyone knowing, but I'm sure that none of you know him anyway. He has severe OCD (obsessive Compulsive Disorder), which is why he takes the zoloft and anxiety meds. It slows down his train of thought and makes it easier for him to make it through the day. And it isn't because he's not attracted to me...which I thought was the reason for a while, so I just up and asked him. Then there's the fact that I can make him get a boner without trying, he just stops things before they get too far. He was all over me when we first got together and then he started applying his OCD stuff to our relationship...like kissing me a specific number of times...stuff like that. Since I first met him, he has changed a lot. He doesn't do as much of the OCD stuff as he used to and has started to travel again...which hasn't happened in around three years. Beh, there is way to much to describe it on here. I only bothered because you don't just throw something like this away because of sex problems. We do have chemistry, we love spending time together...he can't stand being away from me for one night. If there is such a thing as true love, then this is it. I don't want to get all gushy, but that's just it. Before, I thought that I would never meet someone. Sure, he's odd, but he is an amazing person. Anyway, we got into a bit of a spat because he started kissing and groping me when I actually didn't want him to. I said, "You don't want to do that any other time...why now?" and it just continued from there. Later on he said that he was sorry for being an asshole and said, "I'm scared, that's the only reason." My anger hadn't yet worn off at that point, so I couldn't make myself ask him what he meant, but there ya go. I'll probably ask him later tonight when we get home. Well, this post was all over the place...I'm not so sure that it made any sense. Sorry.

04-17-2008, 07:59 PM	#18
Irons77 Training like a bitch Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Houston, Texas Posts: 628	Are you sure he is not gay, blaming it on the meds
	Soreness is weakness exiting the body.

04-22-2008, 04:54 AM	#22
Merkaba Registered User Join Date: Jan 2008 Location: sc Posts: 53	This guy sounds like a fucking pussy. Get rid of him. Period. guys quit acting like you fucking care. Kissasses!!