Random Thoughts From People Our Age

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  1. #1
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    Random Thoughts From People Our Age

    Random Thoughts From People Our Age
    -I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

    -More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

    -Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

    -I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

    -Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

    -I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

    -Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know"
    feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?

    -Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

    -There is a great need for sarcasm font.

    -Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the flip was going on when I first saw it.

    -I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

    -How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

    -I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

    - I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

    -The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

    - LOL has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

    - I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

    - Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

    - Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

    - How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

    - Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in'
    examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

    -What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

    - While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

    - MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

    - Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

    - I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

    -Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty,and you can wear them forever.

    - I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu'
    to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

    -I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

    - Bad decisions make good stories

    -Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

    - Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

    -If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

    -Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

    -You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything else productive for the rest of the day.

    -Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

    -There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

    -I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

    - "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

    -I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

    -I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello?
    Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

    - I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

    -When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

    -I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

    -Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

    - As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

    -Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

    -It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

    -I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

    -Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

    -Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

    -My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

    -It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

    -I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

    -I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

    -I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

    -The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words,someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.
    What Would Fetus Do?

  2. #2
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    You know I remember distinctly that I learned the Nintendo blow in cartridge trick from when we had an Atari and then I had learned that from my father teaching me how he used to get 8-Tracks to work back in the day........
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

  3. #3
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    Funny list.

  4. #4
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    I am a cyclist and even I hate cyclists.

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    -I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.



    Yes, you have probably been motherfucked many times by blocking traffic like that!
    You've never lived untill you've almost died, life has an excitement that the protected will never know.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by QuestionGuy View Post
    -I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.



    Yes, you have probably been motherfucked many times by blocking traffic like that!
    I alway's stay at 5 or 7 over the speed limit I figure that cop behind me needs to get his donut fix and who am I to slow him down......
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fetusaurus Rex View Post
    Random Thoughts From People Our Age
    Are you not like 16?

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by min0 lee View Post
    Are you not like 16?
    27

    16 year olds didnt grow up in the 80s there math wizard
    What Would Fetus Do?

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fetusaurus Rex View Post
    27

    16 year olds didnt grow up in the 80s there math wizard
    Your 27??
    Wow, time flies by.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by min0 lee View Post
    Your 27??
    Wow, time flies by.
    lol yea it does...

    I was...22 or 23 when I joined here I believe...(with the other username)

    I am not Kefe btw
    What Would Fetus Do?

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by maniclion View Post
    I alway's stay at 5 or 7 over the speed limit I figure that cop behind me needs to get his donut fix and who am I to slow him down......
    I always try to pretend that I am driving super safe in an attempt to block them in, until they finally get pissed and blue light me to get the fuck out of the way. At that point I signal a turn for the next mile driving even slower pretending to look for a safe place to turn off. This shit works wonders on one way streets and is a barrel of laughs.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fetusaurus Rex View Post
    27

    16 year olds didnt grow up in the 80s there math wizard
    You barely grew up in the 80's.....I remember seeing Tron and Return of the Jedi on the big screen opening day.....my first year of kindergarten I had my whole room painted with Stars and my dad had bought me every Star Wars space ship available starting from when I was a baby, plus multiple Tie Fighters....him and some friends made a replica Death Star out of some big metal ball they found in a junkyard, they put a dent in it and painted it and drew in detail...I remember my Darth Vader head carrying case...I remember watching Mister Bill on SNL late at night from the stairs when I was supposed to be sleeping.......then my parents divorced and I never got spoiled like that again......
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by maniclion View Post
    You barely grew up in the 80's.....I remember seeing Tron and Return of the Jedi on the big screen opening day.....my first year of kindergarten I had my whole room painted with Stars and my dad had bought me every Star Wars space ship available starting from when I was a baby, plus multiple Tie Fighters....him and some friends made a replica Death Star out of some big metal ball they found in a junkyard, they put a dent in it and painted it and drew in detail...I remember my Darth Vader head carrying case...I remember watching Mister Bill on SNL late at night from the stairs when I was supposed to be sleeping.......then my parents divorced and I never got spoiled like that again......
    I suppose I barely grew up in the 80s, I was born in 82, so I was too young to remember a bit of it but I remember enough...
    What Would Fetus Do?

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by KelJu View Post
    I always try to pretend that I am driving super safe in an attempt to block them in, until they finally get pissed and blue light me to get the fuck out of the way. At that point I signal a turn for the next mile driving even slower pretending to look for a safe place to turn off. This shit works wonders on one way streets and is a barrel of laughs.
    that would be entirely because you're a fag....se normal people don't put glases on their cats and post pictures online as their avatar...infact, normal people have dogs instead of cats......again, you are a complete fucking fag........
    You've never lived untill you've almost died, life has an excitement that the protected will never know.

  15. #15
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    I was maybe 16 or 17 when I started my musclemag career that eventually became my IM self. I can remember when the 21 yr olds were so mature and wise. This thought just made me queasy

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by QuestionGuy View Post
    that would be entirely because you're a fag....se normal people don't put glases on their cats and post pictures online as their avatar...infact, normal people have dogs instead of cats......again, you are a complete fucking fag........

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by QuestionGuy View Post
    that would be entirely because you're a fag....se normal people don't put glases on their cats and post pictures online as their avatar...infact, normal people have dogs instead of cats......again, you are a complete fucking fag........

    Rofl, why the accusation? Are you cruising for a piece of ass?

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by QuestionGuy View Post
    that would be entirely because you're a fag....se normal people don't put glases on their cats and post pictures online as their avatar...infact, normal people have dogs instead of cats......again, you are a complete fucking fag........
    Jack Kerouac was an awesome person not just a normal person and he had lots of cats, I have had cats and dogs my whole life therefore folks like Kelju and I and other cat folks are awesome....
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by maniclion View Post
    Jack Kerouac was an awesome person not just a normal person and he had lots of cats, I have had cats and dogs my whole life therefore folks like Kelju and I and other cat folks are awesome....
    Apparently he thinks people who appreciate pets other than dogs are fags.
    With reasoning like that, no wonder cops get a bad name. You got people like him out in the field making the good ones look bad.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by KelJu View Post
    Apparently he thinks people who appreciate pets other than dogs are fags.
    With reasoning like that, no wonder cops get a bad name. You got people like him out in the field making the good ones look bad.
    I have this deep feeling that Q-Guy is really just a Paul Blart or like Steve Zahn in National Security..........
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by maniclion View Post
    I have this deep feeling that Q-Guy is really just a Paul Blart or like Steve Zahn in National Security..........
    Hahaha, that's so funny, because I thought the exact same thing. Well, either that or Eric Cartman.


  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by KelJu View Post
    Hahaha, that's so funny, because I thought the exact same thing. Well, either that or Eric Cartman.

    hA HA

    Or if he is a cop he's like mix of Barney Fife/Tackleberry from Police Academy or Farva from SuperTroopers
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

  23. #23
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    First thing on a forum this long that I read all the way through. Good stuff!

  24. #24
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    -There is a great need for sarcasm font.

    I got to thinking about this and came to the conclusion that people just need to be more sarcastic....
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
    not yet plucked as to slacken the seams
    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
    eyes of tranquilty, crystalline-beads
    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

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