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Truths For Mature Humans:

Nightowl

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IML Gear Cream!
Truths For Mature Humans:



1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. ( I don't wear a watch anymore)

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974.
That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important.
 
I can bet my left nut to situation commenting the following :










:coffee:
 
Very good. :)
 
That was great!!!

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
7:00 am every Monday thru Friday....lol
 
That was great!!!

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
7:00 am every Monday thru Friday....lol


Many of our GS workers

layman terms: government employees.
(they even sell out the contract bids to relatives for kick backs and hold us hostage to pay the freakin bills..aka tax raises)
 
I don't do the watch thing but I do take out my phone look at the time put it back in my pocket and then think "wait what time is it?" and have to do it again....
 
I love the camaraderie one (20,) deal with that sh*t every morning. If you wanted to go straight why are you in the damn turn lane?! Not on our watch, pal.

I probably agree with or am guilty of over 90% of the list. I never have trouble finding my keys, it's my belt that always goes rogue.
 
love the camaraderie one (20,) deal with that sh*t every morning. If you wanted to go straight why are you in the damn turn lane?! Not on our watch, pal. Hawaii is way different they will hold up traffic all day just so everyone can play leap frog at on and off ramps

I probably agree with or am guilty of over 90% of the list. I never have trouble finding my keys, it's my belt that always goes rogue.
I've never forgotten where I put my keys nor wallet, even if I put them in an unusual spot I have DVR memory I can playback events up to 3 to 4 days after unless I got black out drunk, but just buzzed I can even remember a night of boozing and drugging....
 
IML Gear Cream!
So far your left nut is still in danger. Hope Situation comes through for ya.

It will only be worth it if he cuts off the left nut and youtubes it - otherwise he can just keep it.
 
So far your left nut is still in danger. Hope Situation comes through for ya.
i will save his left nut:thinking:
 
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