Jerry Springer Show

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  1. #1
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    Jerry Springer Show

    Click here for your personalized version of the Jerry Springer show

    Here's how my episode came out...

    The Jerry Springer Show : Episode 627 : "Marriage Meltdown!"
    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    [The crowd starts chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"]

    Jerry: Tonight on "The Jerry Springer Show" we have a particularly interesting episode! butterfly is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend, Fitgirl. So everyone, please put your hands together for butterfly!

    [The crowd whoops and hollers]

    Jerry: Okay, now butterfly you're here to talk about someone aren't you?

    You: Yes.

    Jerry: And what is this other person's name?

    You: Twin Peak.

    [The crowd squeals with delight]

    Jerry: Okay, okay, well Twin Peak, is actually here tonight ...

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you butterfly, because as it happens there is someone else here to see you! So let's bring out ... Princess!

    You: What the HELL!!!

    [Out of nowhere you pull out a gun. Princess reaches for the chair. Out of the shadows Kuso appears]

    Kuso: Wait everybody, wait!

    Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First, tell us why you're here Princess.

    Princess: Because I saw butterfly and Kuso making out at Wal-Mart!

    [The crowd goes absolutely insane]

    Kuso: That's a lie! I was home watching Sex In The City!

    Jerry: [raising his hands] Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here ... what exactly is the problem Princess?

    Princess: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Fitgirl who has recently become engaged to Kuso.

    [The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Fitgirl out here because butterfly had something that they needed to tell them anyway about ... Twin Peak that's right!

    Fitgirl: [enters onto stage and saunters over towards you] What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Twin Peak! You know how I feel about Twin Peak!

    Kuso: [screams] What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Twin Peak!

    Fitgirl: Because I knew that I could never have Twin Peak. But butterfly promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings!

    Kuso: What about respect for my feelings!

    [Princess walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Fitgirl]

    Princess: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.

    [Again the crowd squeals]

    Kuso: Oh my God! Are you sick!?

    [Kuso runs across the room and wraps their arms around you tightly]

    Kuso: butterfly take me away from all of this!

    You: You see? That's the thing ... I'm ... well, I'm married ...

    [The crowd does its bit]

    Kuso: Married?

    [You nod]

    Kuso: Who the hell are you married to? When ... when did this happen? I don't understand!

    You: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Twin Peak.

    Fitgirl: [screaming] WHAT!!!

    Jerry: [grinning widely, makes an enquiry] So ... did you have a nice wedding night?

    Twin Peak: [stepping back out onto center stage] Well we had sex 6 times if that's what you mean.

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight ... butterfly is married to Twin Peak who Fitgirl has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Fitgirl has recently become engaged to Kuso who was recently spotted kissing butterfly in Wal-Mart. Now on top of this, Princess has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Fitgirl.

    Twin Peak: That's right Jerry.

    Jerry: [looking sternly into the camera] It's times like these that one has to wonder whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks - it's been great - but for now, take care of yourselves ... and each other.

    [Cue cheesy background music and fade to black]
    ~Ann
    We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open.
    -Harry Edwards

  2. #2
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    Now rollin' with the Raider

  3. #3
    Give it to me
    Fitgirl70's Avatar


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    OH MY GAAAWWWDDDD

    I have to see what mine says!!!!!!

    But, wait "who did I do what to where?"
    All the glory to God!

  4. #4
    I'm Dead Sexxxxy!!
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    Hahahaha, Mine had Prince and irontime hooking up, they make a good couple!1
    Cool

  5. #5
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    we are a close-knit family, aren't we?

    Where was cousin burner through it all though????
    Success leaves clues. People who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results

    Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is what you are doing NOW to solve our problem

    THERE IS NO TOMORROW!
    - Appollo Creed

  6. #6
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    Dang Kuso.

    Butterfly wants you.

    And Princess and Fitgirl??? Pics please.
    I pedal... Therefore I am.

    ~ You've got to stand for something, or you'll fall for anything. ~

  7. #7
    Just me, being me.
    Trap-isaurus's Avatar


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    Ireally didn't want to post this but what the hell I got a good laugh out of It

    The crowd starts chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"]

    Jerry: Tonight on "The Jerry Springer Show" we have a particularly interesting episode! BjUaFyF is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend, Peetrips. So everyone, please put your hands together for BjUaFyF!

    [The crowd whoops and hollers]

    Jerry: Okay, now BjUaFyF you're here to talk about someone aren't you?

    You: Yes.

    Jerry: And what is this other person's name?

    You: Peetrips Wife.

    [The crowd squeals with delight]

    Jerry: Okay, okay, well Peetrips Wife, is actually here tonight ...

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you BjUaFyF, because as it happens there is someone else here to see you! So let's bring out ... Lean!

    You: What the HELL!!!

    [Out of nowhere you pull out a Bat. Lean reaches for the Lazy-Boy. Out of the shadows Kuso appears]

    Kuso: Wait everybody, wait!

    Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First, tell us why you're here Lean.

    Lean: Because I saw BjUaFyF and Kuso making out at 7-11!

    [The crowd goes absolutely insane]

    Kuso: That's a lie! I was home watching Peoples Court!

    Jerry: [raising his hands] Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here ... what exactly is the problem Lean?

    Lean: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Peetrips who has recently become engaged to Kuso.

    [The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Peetrips out here because BjUaFyF had something that they needed to tell them anyway about ... Peetrips Wife that's right!

    Peetrips: [enters onto stage and saunters over towards you] What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Peetrips Wife! You know how I feel about Peetrips Wife!

    Kuso: [screams] What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Peetrips Wife!

    Peetrips: Because I knew that I could never have Peetrips Wife. But BjUaFyF promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings!

    Kuso: What about respect for my feelings!

    [Lean walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Peetrips]

    Lean: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.

    [Again the crowd squeals]

    Kuso: Oh my God! Are you sick!?

    [Kuso runs across the room and wraps their arms around you tightly]

    Kuso: BjUaFyF take me away from all of this!

    You: You see? That's the thing ... I'm ... well, I'm married ...

    [The crowd does its bit]

    Kuso: Married?

    [You nod]

    Kuso: Who the hell are you married to? When ... when did this happen? I don't understand!

    You: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Peetrips Wife.

    Peetrips: [screaming] WHAT!!!

    Jerry: [grinning widely, makes an enquiry] So ... did you have a nice wedding night?

    Peetrips Wife: [stepping back out onto center stage] Well we had sex 13 times if that's what you mean.

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight ... BjUaFyF is married to Peetrips Wife who Peetrips has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Peetrips has recently become engaged to Kuso who was recently spotted kissing BjUaFyF in 7-11. Now on top of this, Lean has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Peetrips.

    Peetrips Wife: That's right Jerry.

    Jerry: [looking sternly into the camera] It's times like these that one has to wonder whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks - it's been great - but for now, take care of yourselves ... and each other.

    [Cue cheesy background music and fade to black]
    *^All good things come to those who weight (lift!!!)^*

    *^I'm the thread killer
    I'm the thread killer
    I'm the come from behind
    I'm the post attacker^*




  8. #8
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    that was great Butterfly!!

  9. #9

  10. #10
    Peak Physiques™
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    SIX TIMES!

  11. #11

  12. #12
    I'm the daddy
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    So lonely

  13. #13
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    OH MI GOD!! BUTTERFLY THAT WAS HILARIOUS!!! lol..me & FG!!!
    I Believe in the Impossible!!!

  14. #14
    Um......get rooted!
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    Originally posted by Princess
    me & FG!!!
    I remember it was my thoughts about you and FB that first got us talking :o

  15. #15
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    The Jerry Springer Show : Episode 627 : "Marriage Meltdown!"


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    [The crowd starts chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"]

    Jerry: Tonight on "The Jerry Springer Show" we have a particularly interesting episode! Princess is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend, Fitgirl. So everyone, please put your hands together for Princess!

    [The crowd whoops and hollers]

    Jerry: Okay, now Princess you're here to talk about someone aren't you?

    You: Yes.

    Jerry: And what is this other person's name?

    You: Dvlmn.

    [The crowd squeals with delight]

    Jerry: Okay, okay, well Dvlmn, is actually here tonight ...

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you Princess, because as it happens there is someone else here to see you! So let's bring out ... Butterfly!

    You: What the HELL!!!

    [Out of nowhere you pull out a sex. Butterfly reaches for the 4 post bed. Out of the shadows Fade appears]

    Fade: Wait everybody, wait!

    Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First, tell us why you're here Butterfly.

    Butterfly: Because I saw Princess and Fade making out at Foleys!

    [The crowd goes absolutely insane]

    Fade: That's a lie! I was home watching Oprah!

    Jerry: [raising his hands] Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here ... what exactly is the problem Butterfly?

    Butterfly: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Fitgirl who has recently become engaged to Fade.

    [The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Fitgirl out here because Princess had something that they needed to tell them anyway about ... Dvlmn that's right!

    Fitgirl: [enters onto stage and saunters over towards you] What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Dvlmn! You know how I feel about Dvlmn!

    Fade: [screams] What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Dvlmn!

    Fitgirl: Because I knew that I could never have Dvlmn. But Princess promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings!

    Fade: What about respect for my feelings!

    [Butterfly walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Fitgirl]

    Butterfly: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.

    [Again the crowd squeals]

    Fade: Oh my God! Are you sick!?

    [Fade runs across the room and wraps their arms around you tightly]

    Fade: Princess take me away from all of this!

    You: You see? That's the thing ... I'm ... well, I'm married ...

    [The crowd does its bit]

    Fade: Married?

    [You nod]

    Fade: Who the hell are you married to? When ... when did this happen? I don't understand!

    You: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Dvlmn.

    Fitgirl: [screaming] WHAT!!!

    Jerry: [grinning widely, makes an enquiry] So ... did you have a nice wedding night?

    Dvlmn: [stepping back out onto center stage] Well we had sex 11 times if that's what you mean.

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight ... Princess is married to Dvlmn who Fitgirl has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Fitgirl has recently become engaged to Fade who was recently spotted kissing Princess in Foleys. Now on top of this, Butterfly has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Fitgirl.

    Dvlmn: That's right Jerry.

    Jerry: [looking sternly into the camera] It's times like these that one has to wonder whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks - it's been great - but for now, take care of yourselves ... and each other.

    [Cue cheesy background music and fade to black]
    I Believe in the Impossible!!!

  16. #16
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    your right Kuso
    I Believe in the Impossible!!!

  17. #17

  18. #18
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    So if FG & Princess are having a thing and FG & I are having a thing... maybe all 3 of us should hook up
    ~Ann
    We must teach our children to dream with their eyes open.
    -Harry Edwards

  19. #19

  20. #20
    Peak Physiques™
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    Originally posted by butterfly
    So if FG & Princess are having a thing and FG & I are having a thing... maybe all 3 of us should hook up
    Let me know if you need any, um, assistance.

  21. #21
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    OHHH B-- good idea! lol
    I Believe in the Impossible!!!

  22. #22
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    I am soooo Glad I found this! B'Fly, this is so AWESOME!

    This is so funny because I keyed in all of my friend's real names that are involved in relationships! We are all so close too! Butterfly, this is so f'n cool! ;p



    [The crowd starts chanting "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!"]

    Jerry: Tonight on "The Jerry Springer Show" we have a particularly interesting episode! David is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend, Bill. So everyone, please put your hands together for David!

    [The crowd whoops and hollers]

    Jerry: Okay, now David you're here to talk about someone aren't you?

    You: Yes.

    Jerry: And what is this other person's name?

    You: Carolyn.

    [The crowd squeals with delight]

    Jerry: Okay, okay, well Carolyn, is actually here tonight ...

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you David, because as it happens there is someone else here to see you! So let's bring out ... Lacey!

    You: What the HELL!!!

    [Out of nowhere you pull out a Dental pick. Lacey reaches for the Bed. Out of the shadows Lou appears]

    Lou: Wait everybody, wait!

    Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First, tell us why you're here Lacey.

    Lacey: Because I saw David and Lou making out at Best Buy!

    [The crowd goes absolutely insane]

    Lou: That's a lie! I was home watching Three's Company!

    Jerry: [raising his hands] Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here ... what exactly is the problem Lacey?

    Lacey: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Bill who has recently become engaged to Lou.

    [The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Bill out here because David had something that they needed to tell them anyway about ... Carolyn that's right!

    Bill: [enters onto stage and saunters over towards you] What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Carolyn! You know how I feel about Carolyn!

    Lou: [screams] What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Carolyn!

    Bill: Because I knew that I could never have Carolyn. But David promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings!

    Lou: What about respect for my feelings!

    [Lacey walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Bill]

    Lacey: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.

    [Again the crowd squeals]

    Lou: Oh my God! Are you sick!?

    [Lou runs across the room and wraps their arms around you tightly]

    Lou: David take me away from all of this!

    You: You see? That's the thing ... I'm ... well, I'm married ...

    [The crowd does its bit]

    Lou: Married?

    [You nod]

    Lou: Who the hell are you married to? When ... when did this happen? I don't understand!

    You: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Carolyn.

    Bill: [screaming] WHAT!!!

    Jerry: [grinning widely, makes an enquiry] So ... did you have a nice wedding night?

    Carolyn: [stepping back out onto center stage] Well we had sex 50 times if that's what you mean.

    [The crowd squeals]

    Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight ... David is married to Carolyn who Bill has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Bill has recently become engaged to Lou who was recently spotted kissing David in Best Buy. Now on top of this, Lacey has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Bill.

    Carolyn: That's right Jerry.

    Jerry: [looking sternly into the camera] It's times like these that one has to wonder whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks - it's been great - but for now, take care of yourselves ... and each other.

    [Cue cheesy background music and fade to black]

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