The Judge Can't Even Believe This Guy's Last Name...
Arrested for Xanax possession
How about, uh, Edward Cocaine? What? Broward County Judge John Hurley said as he called the 34-year-old Fort Lauderdale mans case in bond court, according to video of the proceedings obtained by the South Florida Sun-Sentinel.
In the video, a voice is then heard off camera, saying, In fairness, we thought at first this might not be his given name.
Next, Hurley asks Cocaine his last name, and he confidently exclaims, My last name is Cocaine.
The video shows Hurley speechless as an off-camera voice says, It is on his drivers license. Im not saying he didnt change it ... I dont know.
After chuckles reverberate across the courtroom, Cocaine says, Im used to it.
You know, I thought Id seen it all, Hurley says. How many times have the police told you to step out of the car, sir, in your life?
Cocaine says, Just about every time I get pulled over.
Right," Hurley says. "As soon as they go, Whats your name? Cocaine. 'Alright smart guy, out of the car.' Right?
Cocaines lawyer pleads to get his client released on his own recognizance, but Hurley says hes not ready to do that just yet.
Im still trying to absorb this, OK? Hurley tells the lawyer.
Cocaine then goes into the origins of his last name.
When my great-grandparents came over here from Greece, they changed it, he said. So they changed it from [unintelligible] to Cocaine. And that was back in the 1920s.
Cocaines lawyer then suggests he change it, but the defendant responds, Well, its my dads name. Back then they didnt know, you know?
Or maybe your grandparents knew and just didnt tell anyone else, you know? Hurley says.
The judge eventually releases Cocaine on his own recognizance.
No cocaine, Cocaine, an off-camera voice warns the defendant. The comment elicited groans in the courtroom.
Broward County court records showed that Cocaine was charged Tuesday with possession of alprazolam, the generic name for Xanax, after a stop in Pembroke Pines, Fla. The charge is a third-degree felony.