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Thread: Mustard

  1. #1
    Fighting Endometriosis


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    Mustard






    I LOVE MUSTARD

    (This is a true story) If you have children you will probably relate
    to
    this father.
    As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of ham, a fresh
    bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet
    mustard.
    The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the table
    in our backyard,
    picked it up with both hands but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my
    side.
    "Hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich," she said.
    I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching
    again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my
    fingers.
    I love mustard.
    I had no napkin.
    I licked it off..
    It was not mustard.
    No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I
    have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand,
    I
    did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.
    Later (after she stopped crying from laughing so hard) my wife! said ,
    "Now you know why they call that mustard..."Poupon.'"
    Don't hate the player, hate the game!http://pages.prodigy.net/rogerlori1/...the%20wave.GIF
    Before you talk about what you want - appreciate what you have.

    http://home.earthlink.net/~gwcaton/s...ctures/tmf.jpg
    A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. -Honore de Balzac
    Desire+Consistency='s RESULTS

  2. #2
    End of the world
    ELITE MEMBER
    Triple Threat's Avatar


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    I do like that mustard, but now you've ruined it for me. Thankfully my kids are out of diapers.

  3. #3
    EAST COAST BRAT
    david's Avatar


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    I use mustard to attempt to stave off cramping (and it works for me!)

    Babs, you are too hilarious sometimes!

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