If that was pollywog day..... I'd hate to see what they did to you guys the next day!!!!!!!!!!
we were awakened on valentines day at 0500. i woke up to a ss cooking pot being beaten with a metal spoon. it was covering my face. "get your f***in' wog asses up and bow to your shellback gods you pieces of shit! be ready to get f***ed by king neptune and all his royal court!" and other pleasentries greeted me as soon as i got my hearing back. we had to wear our shirts and pants inside out and backwards "so king neptune can see what a bunch of stupid f***in' wogs you are and so you can be sodomized by all of his loyal subjects at their leisure" we went to chow at about 0600. everything was green. the bacon was like leather, the sos was so hot that some people were in tears, the eggs were runny and some special wogs had to eat balute(a delicacy in the far east. it is a fertilized chicken or duck egg that is partially developed and buried in the sand for a time then dug up and eaten. also called 1000y/o eggs) the only thing that they didn't screw with was the coffee. some things are sacred after chow we were herded onto the foc'sal. we were then doused with fire hoses and told that our "f***in' wog lives were shit and we would either become shellbacks and give them to king neptune or be keelhauled like the f***ing sacks of shit we are". the water felt pretty good as the temp at 0800 was already about 95. we then had to get on our hands and knees and crawl down the main deck heading aft. the deck is covered in non-skid so it's pretty rough. as we crawled through the breakwater hatch we saw firefighting water applicators attached to the lifelines and stanchions so we were under a constant salt water shower, the shellbacks were waiting for us and they all had shilelaghs made of 3' pieces of canvas firehose to tenderize our wog asses. we had eggs stuffed down our pants then broken. we had syrup, grease, flour, grits,...etc poured on us and down our clothes. the whole time we were crawling they were asking us "what the f***k are you?" and you had to reply "i'm a f**kin' wog !" if you didn't answer correctly you had to go back and start all over again. after crawling down the main deck@150' we had to crawl up to the 01 level and be seen by king neptunes court. the king was the fattest grossest shellback on board and he was dressed in a diaper and you had to kiss the royal belly. it was coated with lard, sardines, raw eggs, and hotsauce and when you got close they grabbed you and shoved your face in it. then came the queen. i forgot to tell you about the beauty contest on wog day. each division had to dress up one wog as a woman to compete. the winner did not have to go through the initiation. the costumes were pretty good with fake boobs and all. some guys wore bikinis and did the old tuck up. most shaved their legs. one division told their guy to either shave or use duct tape
he shaved. they had a talent comp. some sang, some lap danced, some sucked on bananas. the winner was the skagiest one of all of course
when you went to the queen they had a tube taped between her legs that was connected to warm lemon bugjuice. when you crawled under her you got a golden shower. then you crawled to the royal baby and had to kiss it. when you got close they covered your eyes and jamed your face on it's belly but when your eyes were uncovered all you saw was hairy ass. that was when some fights broke out until some guys saw what they really did. you then had to drink beer(this was the only time you got to while underway) with oysters,tabasco, green food coloring, raw eggs, and god knows what else in it. then you were coated with syrup and canned corn and called a whale turd. then more crawling and beating and eggs and goodies and asking you what you were and the salt water sprays and the temp was well over 100 with humidity at 110%. then came the garbage chute. it was a tube about 30' long that was filled with garbage that had been fermenting for about 3 days. for the previous 2 or 3 weeks everytime a wog located the garbage stash we jumped the shellbacks and threw it overboard. they hid about 6 55 gal trashcans in the 2 firerooms. the temp in there stayes about 105 so they were ripe. if you were one of the 1st you had the really gross shit to crawl through. the farther back you were the more puke you had to crawl through. after the garbege chute you were hit with a 2 1/2" hose then you swam through 2 asroc coffins. when you got out you were tackeled and dunked in a homemade pool and when you came up they asked you what you were. if you didn't yell "i'm a fucking shellback" they kept dunking you until you did. i heard the guy in front of me so it only took 1 time for me. some guys were nearly drowned before they caught on. some had to be told or they would still be getting dunked
after all this we took off all our clothes and threw them overboard and took a saltwater shower with degreaser then went inside and took a freshwater shower. then some guys went to relieve the watchstanders so they could go through it. anyone that didn't want to be initiated simply stayed on watch. then we cleaned up the ship and had a cookout on the 01 level. we're all sons of neptune and members of the royal order of shellbacks. an exclusive club
Ginni,could you ploueeeaaase tell MBC that those shrimps don't bite,I don't think she believes me...
