I Just Have to Rant a Little...

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  1. #1
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    I Just Have to Rant a Little...






    Here it goes:

    I started seeing the psychologist about 6 months ago because I was feeling really depressed (had a lot of emotional problems). Turns out that my depression stemmed from a hypersensitivity to criticism (interesting because I work in a position known for being at the top of the most stressful jobs list - Master Control of a television station ), which most likely started because I really hated myself deep down for being so different from everyone. I was taller, I had uncontrollable twitches (only slightly better now), and then I realized I was gay (which really put me over the edge and I thought a few times about suicide). We went through all of that and are now dealing with my self-defeating nature. I'm trying to become more comfortable with myself, at least enough to be able to meet other guys (not for sex necessarily) and maybe one day build a relationship with someone.

    It's been fun getting more involved in the "gay culture." I can see some of the little, seemingly innocent things that straight people say and how my views on everything have changed. Engagement announcements almost make me angry now because I know that I may never be able to do that and if I do have a "ceremony" that it'll probably be met with more opposition than anyone out there knows - I've heard of people receiving threats, family members disowning their sons/daughters, and some members threatening legal action of some sort, plus mom will either not show up or be there crying. That is just one item, there are a lot of seemingly innocent things our straight friends talk to us about that just dig a little deeper (raising kids is the next most common one I think).

    Anyways, that's the end of my rant, I feel a little better now.

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    kids these days.





    (i mistyped that 3 times before I got to the final version)




    well, like I said. or didnt say. or intended to say.


    you seem like genuine, positive neat person. Im sorry that I couldnt think of anything more coherent or positive to say, because I am exhausted and I basically just wanted to say that I support you, and that Im sorry that today's culture isnt more accepting of you and your life.

    As a Christian, I dont fundamentally support your lifestyle, however, Christ taught his followers to love their neighbors, above all else.


    I will say, though, that as an American, who lives in a nation that was founded utilizing SOME Christian IDEALS, and not upon the Bible itself, and not founded as a theocracy, I believe wholeheartedly that you should receive more support than you do, from the government.

    You are harming none other than those who cannot tear the shrouds of ignorance and blind hatred from their eyes, and you are only even negatively affecting them because they cannot be adult with the situation, and open their minds and see that we are a progressive society.


    or something

    tl;dr:

    stick it to the man.







    aaaaahhhhhhh why am i so lame.


    I almost put you go girl, but I didnt want you to think that I wouldnt normally say stupid shit like that


    because I do.
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    Quote Originally Posted by FishOrCutBait View Post
    kids these days.





    (i mistyped that 3 times before I got to the final version)




    well, like I said. or didnt say. or intended to say.


    you seem like genuine, positive neat person. Im sorry that I couldnt think of anything more coherent or positive to say, because I am exhausted and I basically just wanted to say that I support you, and that Im sorry that today's culture isnt more accepting of you and your life.

    As a Christian, I dont fundamentally support your lifestyle, however, Christ taught his followers to love their neighbors, above all else.


    I will say, though, that as an American, who lives in a nation that was founded utilizing SOME Christian IDEALS, and not upon the Bible itself, and not founded as a theocracy, I believe wholeheartedly that you should receive more support than you do, from the government.

    You are harming none other than those who cannot tear the shrouds of ignorance and blind hatred from their eyes, and you are only even negatively affecting them because they cannot be adult with the situation, and open their minds and see that we are a progressive society.


    or something

    tl;dr:

    stick it to the man.







    aaaaahhhhhhh why am i so lame.


    I almost put you go girl, but I didnt want you to think that I wouldnt normally say stupid shit like that


    because I do.
    When you wake up, will you translate this a little for me. I got parts of it, but there are still some I can't decode.



    Seriously, I love guys like you who can be followers of a religion and still understand the core tenets of their religion (I get the feeling that certain people just can't do that, and sometimes they're in positions of power ). Thank you very much for your support!

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    I fail to see why anyone on this planet cares what someone else does when it has absolutely no direct effect on them. Shoving our nose in other people's business is just the American way, I guess. I hate ignorance.
    If sense were common, everyone would have it.

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    Nice to hear from you Dale!

    You're all too kind, thanks guys!

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    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    Here it goes:

    I started seeing the psychologist about 6 months ago because I was feeling really depressed (had a lot of emotional problems). Turns out that my depression stemmed from a hypersensitivity to criticism (interesting because I work in a position known for being at the top of the most stressful jobs list - Master Control of a television station ), which most likely started because I really hated myself deep down for being so different from everyone. I was taller, I had uncontrollable twitches (only slightly better now), and then I realized I was gay (which really put me over the edge and I thought a few times about suicide). We went through all of that and are now dealing with my self-defeating nature. I'm trying to become more comfortable with myself, at least enough to be able to meet other guys (not for sex necessarily) and maybe one day build a relationship with someone.

    It's been fun getting more involved in the "gay culture." I can see some of the little, seemingly innocent things that straight people say and how my views on everything have changed. Engagement announcements almost make me angry now because I know that I may never be able to do that and if I do have a "ceremony" that it'll probably be met with more opposition than anyone out there knows - I've heard of people receiving threats, family members disowning their sons/daughters, and some members threatening legal action of some sort, plus mom will either not show up or be there crying. That is just one item, there are a lot of seemingly innocent things our straight friends talk to us about that just dig a little deeper (raising kids is the next most common one I think).

    Anyways, that's the end of my rant, I feel a little better now.
    Don't go down that bitter road, man. You'll just end up with so many other "victims".

    Ya know what? Life sucks for just about everybody. And by "suck", I mean that everything isn't perfect in their life and everything isn't handed to them on a silver platter.

    Sure, you've got some things that others don't, like tourettes syndrome. Consider this: Have you ever once said to yourself, "Hey, I'm fortunate that I wasn't born with down syndrome"? It's all about the perspective that you choose. That's right, I said "choose".

    There are things you can change, and there are things you can't change. Such is life. Yeah, I was born into poverty, but I rose above that. However, I'll never be able to hear in my right ear. And such is life.

    If you get to the point where all you say is that life "isn't fair" and that you're a victim, you've pretty much given up on controlling your own life. After all, if you were in control of your life, how could so many of the "unfair" things happen to your without your consent?


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    Quote Originally Posted by Dale Mabry View Post
    I fail to see why anyone on this planet cares what someone else does when it has absolutely no direct effect on them. Shoving our nose in other people's business is just the American way, I guess. I hate ignorance.
    A lot of people on this planet do that. Few have the ability to do with the power that Americans can.

    But yeah, I'm sure we corner the market on butting in on things that don't involve us as individuals. I forgot, when is the next ethnic cleansing coming up?


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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    Don't go down that bitter road, man. You'll just end up with so many other "victims".

    Ya know what? Life sucks for just about everybody. And by "suck", I mean that everything isn't perfect in their life and everything isn't handed to them on a silver platter.

    Sure, you've got some things that others don't, like tourettes syndrome. Consider this: Have you ever once said to yourself, "Hey, I'm fortunate that I wasn't born with down syndrome"? It's all about the perspective that you choose. That's right, I said "choose".

    There are things you can change, and there are things you can't change. Such is life. Yeah, I was born into poverty, but I rose above that. However, I'll never be able to hear in my right ear. And such is life.

    If you get to the point where all you say is that life "isn't fair" and that you're a victim, you've pretty much given up on controlling your own life. After all, if you were in control of your life, how could so many of the "unfair" things happen to your without your consent?
    You're right, I just got to take the bull by the balls and get back into the saddle!

    2009 First Place Florida State Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Champions - Elite Fighting Academy

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    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    You're right, I just got to take the bull by the balls and get back into the saddle!
    Every time you mix metaphors, an English teacher kills a puppy.

    Getting the most out of life involves knowing what you want, getting it, and letting go of those things that you cannot change.

    Additionally, I think these words from Gore Vidal are appropriate for this post: "Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say, and not giving a damn."

    You've come a long way tallcall, why not continue on?


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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    Every time you mix metaphors, an English teacher kills a puppy.

    Getting the most out of life involves knowing what you want, getting it, and letting go of those things that you cannot change.

    Additionally, I think these words from Gore Vidal are appropriate for this post: "Style is knowing who you are, what you want to say, and not giving a damn."

    You've come a long way tallcall, why not continue on?
    Puppy murderer!

    I really do try to just go out there and not give a damn about what anyone else thinks (that's gotten me pretty far), but I just don't have the strength sometimes (I guess it pays to have friends - in person).

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    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    Puppy murderer!
    Hey, you're the one using the puppy-killing mixed metaphors.

    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    I really do try to just go out there and not give a damn about what anyone else thinks (that's gotten me pretty far), but I just don't have the strength sometimes (I guess it pays to have friends - in person).
    Achieving a good level of self-respect isn't easy. If it was, there wouldn't be so many people with low self-esteem.

    Heh, I came up with a saying for having a good level of self-esteem about a 10 months ago.

    When people mistake your self-confidence for indifference, then you're where you should be.


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    Wow, IM has gotten up close and personal.
    Quote Originally Posted by kbm8795 View Post
    Oh, I think Americans understand that the one thing conservatives hate the most is the idea of spending American tax money on Americans. . .in America.


    Your tax money is safe. . .in Iraq.
    Total ownage.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BigDyl View Post
    Wow, IM has gotten up close and personal.
    I just felt the need for a little ranting. I guess I needed a little therapy. How's things going with you anyway?

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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    Hey, you're the one using the puppy-killing mixed metaphors.



    Achieving a good level of self-respect isn't easy. If it was, there wouldn't be so many people with low self-esteem.

    Heh, I came up with a saying for having a good level of self-esteem about a 10 months ago.

    When people mistake your self-confidence for indifference, then you're where you should be.
    You're the one holding the knife! And, if you're relying on my to not use mixed metaphors, then we're going to have a sort of species cleansing on our hands (or should I say yours, I envision many bloody knives dulled by the bones of your victims)!

    So I'll just go on not giving a sh*t about what anyone else thinks and let them say what they want, I'll try not to let it get to me or anything. The most difficult people to do that to are my parents, they kind of disapprove of all this and think I should be on medication, I guess I'll just have to ignore them on all of this (it's not like they have to know

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    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    You're the one holding the knife! And, if you're relying on my to not use mixed metaphors, then we're going to have a sort of species cleansing on our hands (or should I say yours, I envision many bloody knives dulled by the bones of your victims)!
    I've covered my preferences for killing before.

    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    So I'll just go on not giving a sh*t about what anyone else thinks and let them say what they want, I'll try not to let it get to me or anything. The most difficult people to do that to are my parents, they kind of disapprove of all this and think I should be on medication, I guess I'll just have to ignore them on all of this (it's not like they have to know
    That's the delicate balance. You can't really be 100% self-contained without alienating family and friends. At the same time, you need to make sure that their influence in just that, influence, and not the core of who you are.

    I wish that I could give you definitive percentage, but it just doesn't work that way. I can say that if you spend a significant portion of each day fretting about what other think of you, that's there is some work that needs to be done.


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    Quote Originally Posted by BigDyl View Post
    Wow, IM has gotten up close and personal.
    When you're ready to come out of the closet, I'll be there for you, too!


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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    When you're ready to come out of the closet, I'll be there for you, too!
    With a shotgun?

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    You know me so well.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Dale Mabry View Post
    I fail to see why anyone on this planet cares what someone else does when it has absolutely no direct effect on them. Shoving our nose in other people's business is just the American way, I guess. I hate ignorance.
    wow, crazy. that's well put and basically the exact same way i feel.

    im an agnostic, so i dont feel the way i do for any religious reasons.
    but someone told me a long time ago to just be an honest man, so ive done the best i can.
    i support you dude, and wish you the best. you dont deserve to be treated or looked at any differently.

    but ill be honest, who has heard of chris crocker?
    ...thats a little too much, sorry..but..jeesh..

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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    You know me so well.
    oooo.. Mr.Moderator now... congrats!

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    Quote Originally Posted by BulkMeUp View Post
    oooo.. Mr.Moderator now... congrats!
    Thanks, man!

    I'm just doing my bit to keep IM clean. You'd be surprised at the amount of crap that the mods have been taking care of behind the scenes.


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    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    I just felt the need for a little ranting. I guess I needed a little therapy. How's things going with you anyway?
    You are a good person, you seem to be one of the most genuine people here, and its stupid, and wretched that people in this world would try to repress you in any way, because its few and far between to see people with a difference that media or certain aspects of culture try to exaggerate, who simply lives their life in a normal fashion.

    On a different note,

    It is possible that the laws regarding homosexual unions may change drastically within the next ten years. In fact, I hope they do, many of our citizens are being unfairly cast away from having a marital type union with someone whom they genuinely love and care for.

    Im sure though, that certain people exist that could provide you two with a ceremony, if only for you to have the emotional state or mental satisfaction in that.

    I also think that you would be a great parent, you would probably make extra lengths to make your kid feel accepted by you, and supported by you.

    But I digress, and I have a job interview in an hour and fifteen.

    TALLCALL,

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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    You know me so well.
    I want you to jiggle your asian titties in my face
    This is my journal. Click it and such

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    Being different sucks! It often leads to depression, but it doesn't have to. I think behavioral therapy, a good attitude, fortitude, and old fashion hope can bring you back on top of your game.

    There is somebody out there for everyone, if we chose to never give up looking. Oh, and fuck the haters. They are usually angry pissy nobodies with no life and live to put down others in an attempt to bring down everyone else to their level. Try to ignore them.

    The best revenge is living well, so smile and try to enjoy your life. It will just burn those people up when they see you enjoying your life.
    Fucking Determined!

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    I have always used peoples ill attitudes towards me as power, everytime someone told me I wasn't good enough or that I'd never amount to anything or that I was a freak I would store it in the motivation warehouse in my mind, then I would use it to show them up by achieving goals I had set....I am positive that most of my enemies who know where I am in life now are very jealous of my current situation...
    Coarse edged youth, the irish pendants string from their smiles
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    and drag down the features of age,
    no folds or creases from unkempt wear
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    no sign of despair in their hair, nor their hearts
    but oh they have yet to be experienced and that makes aging so very worth it...ML circa2012

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    Quote Originally Posted by KelJu View Post
    Being different sucks! It often leads to depression, but it doesn't have to. I think behavioral therapy, a good attitude, fortitude, and old fashion hope can bring you back on top of your game.

    There is somebody out there for everyone, if we chose to never give up looking. Oh, and fuck the haters. They are usually angry pissy nobodies with no life and live to put down others in an attempt to bring down everyone else to their level. Try to ignore them.

    The best revenge is living well, so smile and try to enjoy your life. It will just burn those people up when they see you enjoying your life.

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    You guys are all too cool, thanks for your support!

    I saw my therapist today and I think we were able to work through a lot of this together.

    2009 First Place Florida State Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Champions - Elite Fighting Academy

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    Quote Originally Posted by tallcall View Post
    You guys are all too cool, thanks for your support!

    I saw my therapist today and I think we were able to work through a lot of this together.
    Good to hear, brother
    This is my journal. Click it and such

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    keep in mind that Florida has a lot of free counseling and crisis center locations that help with the same emotions that you're dealing with.

    sometimes it's easy to get stuck inside your own "bubble" and this limits your abilities to see alternative perspectives on a situation, which is why something like creating this thread can be so cathartic. It can be easy to be surrounded by the same people and places and influences and become blindsighted to anything new or positive. Keep at the therapy. I like to think that the future will be different to the gay culture. I certainly hope so. Eventually, I'd like to see us to look back on how we've treated our gay community similar to that of the women and black rights movements. Every time I say this someone says it'll never happen or that I'm a tard, but if someone had said 100 years ago that women or black people will get to vote someday no one would have believed him either

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    Quote Originally Posted by DOMS View Post
    I've covered my preferences for killing before.


    That was an absolute classic thread. That dude Dero totally flipped out after most went "fuck the human, I'll save my dog Rover".

    We need more threads like that. IM's is most fun when people are arguing over rediculous points like that.

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