Bear with. English = 5th tongue = me.
5) Will finally manage to hack FBI site and get my name off silly child-predator list! (Some parents have no sense of humor. )
4) Will finally stop giving FBI reason to put my name on silly child-predator list!
3) Wife and dog constant bickering will be brought to end! One will stay, one will go....I let them decide. (Either way, food and sex obligations must still be met!)
2) This year will be year I finally get hang of the whole "pee while standing up" thing. It is weird concept to be sure, but 15 years of failure is long enough! I will conquer!
1) Surround sound speakers + thin walls + accidental switching to homo-gay channel late night during 6th hour of apparent 10-hour butt-sex marathon = funny look from neighbors when meet in hallway. This year will learn make eye contact again!