On motivation...

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  1. #1
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    On motivation...

    *Somewhat long, and a partial diatribe, but a good read for people who are lacking motivation *

    For everyone who is embarking on this fitness journey (for most, it will or has already become a life long pursuit) there is, behind it all, motivation.

    Recently I have put on close to 10 lbs from my lowest weight in september. The cause? Lack of motivation and more importantly, I was doing it for the WRONG reasons! This post is mainly dedicated to new users, or people who have are relatively new at the game, however it applies to everyone who aspires to be fit.

    I am not going to bullshit you, I did it for the girls. I went through my entire high school tenure at 260 lbs at 5'10. Let me tell you, I wasn't the first one to jump in at pool parties. But then I started losing weight. I got it in my head that I was going to get fit no matter what, and nothing would stop me! I would put highschool behind me, and be absolutely ripped for college! Life would be golden!

    Well, I lost about 65 lbs and went down to 195 (after a total of 2 and a half years, losing it in intervals). I was ecstatic, confident, and a tank in the gym. I was picked first in sports, I could outrun all my friends, and I....got a girlfriend. Thats when the problems arose...

    I stopped being motivated for the gym. This girl was very into me, and I had an amazing relationship, and was completely content with everything in my life for the first time in...well, ever. Perhaps I got too comfortable. My diet became more relaxed; I had a girlfriend now, right? What harm would a cookie, or a bowl of icecream do? Or worse yet, if im feeling abit bored, or hanging out with my girlfriend, why not skip the gym that day? This way of thinking soon became regular. I would have seconds for dinner, indulge a little too often and my training schedule was sporadic. This hit me a few weeks ago when I stepped on the scale at the gym for the first time in months... 207 (in september I was 195). I was devastated... I immediately went home and re-wrote all my goals and action plan. I had to stop that behavior before it got too far gone, and I sat down and thought about how it had happened... It was the girl.

    Once I got the girlfriend, which was my whole driving purpose, my edge, that little chip on my shoulder that said "no, you do not need a bowl of icecream right now. have some fruit, jackass, youl thank me later", I fell off the wagon. Fitness wasnt nearly as important, as I had reached my end result. I was not doing it to be healthy, or to excell at sports, or to run a marathon. I did it for vanity, and it came back to bite me.

    If you have read this far, thank you. I mainly just needed to express this for myself, but I figured that SOMEONE in this community has had a problem similar... so please, when you are writing down your goals and thinking about WHY you are doing all this in the first place, why you are pushing it in the gym, why you are using the eliptical for 60 minutes, why you are so focused on your diet (come on... oatmeal gets old) make sure you do it for the right reasons! It will help you in the end, and remind you that this is a lifelong journey, not a short term fix. Now I must get to the gym... there is work to be done.

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArnoldsProtege View Post
    *Somewhat long, and a partial diatribe, but a good read for people who are lacking motivation *

    For everyone who is embarking on this fitness journey (for most, it will or has already become a life long pursuit) there is, behind it all, motivation.

    Recently I have put on close to 10 lbs from my lowest weight in september. The cause? Lack of motivation and more importantly, I was doing it for the WRONG reasons! This post is mainly dedicated to new users, or people who have are relatively new at the game, however it applies to everyone who aspires to be fit.

    I am not going to bullshit you, I did it for the girls. I went through my entire high school tenure at 260 lbs at 5'10. Let me tell you, I wasn't the first one to jump in at pool parties. But then I started losing weight. I got it in my head that I was going to get fit no matter what, and nothing would stop me! I would put highschool behind me, and be absolutely ripped for college! Life would be golden!

    Well, I lost about 65 lbs and went down to 195 (after a total of 2 and a half years, losing it in intervals). I was ecstatic, confident, and a tank in the gym. I was picked first in sports, I could outrun all my friends, and I....got a girlfriend. Thats when the problems arose...

    I stopped being motivated for the gym. This girl was very into me, and I had an amazing relationship, and was completely content with everything in my life for the first time in...well, ever. Perhaps I got too comfortable. My diet became more relaxed; I had a girlfriend now, right? What harm would a cookie, or a bowl of icecream do? Or worse yet, if im feeling abit bored, or hanging out with my girlfriend, why not skip the gym that day? This way of thinking soon became regular. I would have seconds for dinner, indulge a little too often and my training schedule was sporadic. This hit me a few weeks ago when I stepped on the scale at the gym for the first time in months... 207 (in september I was 195). I was devastated... I immediately went home and re-wrote all my goals and action plan. I had to stop that behavior before it got too far gone, and I sat down and thought about how it had happened... It was the girl.

    Once I got the girlfriend, which was my whole driving purpose, my edge, that little chip on my shoulder that said "no, you do not need a bowl of icecream right now. have some fruit, jackass, youl thank me later", I fell off the wagon. Fitness wasnt nearly as important, as I had reached my end result. I was not doing it to be healthy, or to excell at sports, or to run a marathon. I did it for vanity, and it came back to bite me.

    If you have read this far, thank you. I mainly just needed to express this for myself, but I figured that SOMEONE in this community has had a problem similar... so please, when you are writing down your goals and thinking about WHY you are doing all this in the first place, why you are pushing it in the gym, why you are using the eliptical for 60 minutes, why you are so focused on your diet (come on... oatmeal gets old) make sure you do it for the right reasons! It will help you in the end, and remind you that this is a lifelong journey, not a short term fix. Now I must get to the gym... there is work to be done.
    I would like to point out that your situation sounds almost identical to me. In high school I was about 6'0 265 lbs. I lost about 75 lbs in 10 months. So my loss was quicker than yours but still the same situation. I was determined to be ripped in college and look great. I am still in that phase though. I currently weigh about 188 pounds and am still in the best shape of my life (AND somehow I am able to drink 15-20 beers on weekends and stay this way right now). I have had a great time going out, meeting girls, ect. I recently started getting close to one girl and probably will be dating her soon. But I can say that I do not think I will lose motivation in the gym at all. Mainly because (I hope this is not going in to too much detail) but it is the first time in my life that I have been with a girl where I can tell she is totally in to my body. It changes the physical part of the relationship in a way that I cannot even begin to describe. I am motivated for myself, but the fact that she seems so in to my body also keeps me motivated to get better and better.

    Just my 2 cents. And I say keep your body in tip top shape because then the girls will dig it, including your girlfriend if you get one

  3. #3
    Glad you are getting back on track!
    ...

  4. #4
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    Wow thats a great fat loss... congrats.

    The problem is, my girlfriend loves me the way I am! (haha thats actually not a problem, but a very good quality to have)
    I just let my gaurd down because I was feeling so comfortable... and she has been a terrible influence on me! She has surprised me not once, not twice, but three times in the new year with Mandarin reservations (a chinese buffet). She gets offended if I dont eat my moneys worth haha. I have told her to cut back on the all you can eat, and informed her that I am going to be alot stricter.

    Thanks for the comment... It feels great to be back. I still look good, and my arms are defined and I am muscular, but the fat around my "pooch" area just by my belly button and the love handles is more abundant than before. The fact that I have alot of loose skin bothers me even more. Oh well... gonna keep truckin; i will be 180 by mid summer

  5. #5
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    It happens to the best of us. The combo of lots of stress from school, a tough school/work schedule, girlfriend and miscellaneous responsibilities had me out of regular training for a good year or so, and on a shit diet filled with take out and grab what you can from the vending machine.

    I put on about 30 lbs of pure fat, lost muscle and am totally out of shape.

    The difference between guys like us and guys that really just do it for women is that guys like us will go back and train our asses off eventually. The rest just give it up for good.

    Lesson, we will always have peaks and valleys (not just in training but in life). The important thing is to never stop trying. Becoming complacent is the worst thing anyone can do IMO.
    "The greatest obstacle to knowledge is not ignorance but the illusion of knowledge." -Barry Marshall, Nobel Laureate

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yanick View Post
    It happens to the best of us. The combo of lots of stress from school, a tough school/work schedule, girlfriend and miscellaneous responsibilities had me out of regular training for a good year or so, and on a shit diet filled with take out and grab what you can from the vending machine.

    I put on about 30 lbs of pure fat, lost muscle and am totally out of shape.

    The difference between guys like us and guys that really just do it for women is that guys like us will go back and train our asses off eventually. The rest just give it up for good.

    Lesson, we will always have peaks and valleys (not just in training but in life). The important thing is to never stop trying. Becoming complacent is the worst thing anyone can do IMO.
    Well said. Your story makes me feel better Im gonna be back in fighting shape in no time. Started playing basketball twice a week for 2 hours and hockey mon-fri, and on saturdays we play football all day. Combined with 4 days of weight training mainly compound lifts, and a clean diet, Im feelin good!

    Thats totally key, to remember that it is a LIFELONG journey; we must think big picture. At first I was devastated... all that work for nothing, now I need to train so hard just to get back to where I already WAS.... I didnt see big picture, and that I am only 20 and all this took place over a span of 3 months... I am gonna get back into it with a vengeance, and with a lifelong goal.

  7. #7
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    start thinking with your penis agian lol

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by 629RWHPstang View Post
    start thinking with your penis agian lol
    LMAO perfect

    i started out for that reason i was always a little chubby , but i was never serious just liek once a weelk or something then i got a gf and for the first year i kept doing that, then for some reason i started going every day and got dedicated to it and im not sure why i started i just did .....well now i weigh 30 pounds heavier and have lost 4% bf since then and i absolutely love making improvements i have to be bigger, and in better shape its never satisfied i am not 100% sure what motivates me now but my gf doesn't seem to mind
    Life is hard, Train harder My Goals Blog
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    friend " man i am not feeling the gym today" me " all i hear is la la la i am a little bitch"

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArnoldsProtege View Post
    Wow thats a great fat loss... congrats.

    The problem is, my girlfriend loves me the way I am! (haha thats actually not a problem, but a very good quality to have)
    I just let my gaurd down because I was feeling so comfortable... and she has been a terrible influence on me! She has surprised me not once, not twice, but three times in the new year with Mandarin reservations (a chinese buffet). She gets offended if I dont eat my moneys worth haha. I have told her to cut back on the all you can eat, and informed her that I am going to be alot stricter.

    Thanks for the comment... It feels great to be back. I still look good, and my arms are defined and I am muscular, but the fat around my "pooch" area just by my belly button and the love handles is more abundant than before. The fact that I have alot of loose skin bothers me even more. Oh well... gonna keep truckin; i will be 180 by mid summer



    "loves me the way i am"

    i mean
    im a true advocate of looks arent everything
    but seriously

    they matter
    dont kid yourself


    think about your girlfriend
    im sure she is attractive in your eye right
    thats how the interest got sparked

    if she had been a disgusting fat unhealthy chick, you never would have become interested in the first place

    dont kid yourself

    no matter how serious you get
    physical attraction will always matter
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  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ben dur View Post
    "loves me the way i am"

    i mean
    im a true advocate of looks arent everything
    but seriously

    they matter
    dont kid yourself


    think about your girlfriend
    im sure she is attractive in your eye right
    thats how the interest got sparked

    if she had been a disgusting fat unhealthy chick, you never would have become interested in the first place

    dont kid yourself

    no matter how serious you get
    physical attraction will always matter
    exactly, my girlfriend likes me for who I am too, but part of who I am is a lean fairly muscular looking guy. I like to think of it as providing her with the full package instead of just half of the good stuff

  11. #11
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    think about it

    you dont want to get the

    "i loved you for who you were, but people change"
    and trust me

    if you change to much
    she will loose the physical attraction
    and i guarantee unless she looses her physical attractiveness
    there will be other guys eager to snatch her away
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  12. #12
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    so think of this as motivation

    if a guy knows who her boyfriend is, he wont likely fuck with her

    and likewise
    you can trust she is more physically attracted to you than the other guy
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  13. #13
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    revamp her diet and take her to the gym with you


    before you know it youll be banging jamie eason
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  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ben dur View Post
    revamp her diet and take her to the gym with you


    before you know it youll be banging jamie eason
    haha that is actually the best thing. My girlfriend used to do gymnastics a couple years ago when she was in High school. She is still in shape but doesn't do gymnastics. Now she wants to go to the gym with me when I go. But, I don't really like that, its distracting, I bring her in and sit her on a cardio machine while I do real work

  15. #15
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    haha thats funny... I actually have thought about that, wether shed leave me if I ever got fat again LOL (sort of an insecure thing to think about) . I wasnt SUPER ripped to begin with when I snatched her, but I was in my prime (still some loose skin on the stomach grr.... but face was and is fairly chiselled, and im still quite built).

    She is quite good looking, and has a really good body (naturally, she is the type who never works out, loves cheesecake, and is fit). She truly did fall for ME as a person, as cheesy as that sounds lol. We have identical interests, both love the same things, and I make her laugh easilly. I was of average body fat when she met me... was by no means ripped, but the tonage was there, and she is in no way one of those... I dont want to call them DUMB girls, as that is a generalization, but she is not a blond, chearleader, go team, i hate reading yall type girl. Shes a nerd, and I am a nerd, but were cool lol. we love each others brains.

    As for the body... well, it didn't take long to get back my motivation. Im hittin the gym with regularity now, and the more I am seeing my gains, the more I want to keep hitting. The most IMPORTANT thing is that I recognized that I was falling off the wagon and I did something about it. I know I will be a life long gym goer, and will never ever ever be what I was before I lose the weight. ever. I will be healthy and athletic all my life, and if a few pounds come here or there well, so be it. I will deal with it accordingly. If life was easy, what fun would that be?

    If all else fails, 20 years from now im sure well have conjured up a miracle fat loss pill

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by 629RWHPstang View Post
    start thinking with your penis agian lol
    Hahaha, I agree.

    The only motivation I need, I get through the Hot women gallery on this board!

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArnoldsProtege View Post



    If all else fails, 20 years from now im sure well have conjured up a miracle fat loss pill
    Yeah but at that point you will only be what, 15-20 years away from reaching Viagra use? Don't allow yourself to fail until the viagra period please!

  18. #18
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    edited

    ------------
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  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by ArnoldsProtege View Post
    haha thats funny... I actually have thought about that, wether shed leave me if I ever got fat again LOL (sort of an insecure thing to think about) . I wasnt SUPER ripped to begin with when I snatched her, but I was in my prime (still some loose skin on the stomach grr.... but face was and is fairly chiselled, and im still quite built).

    She is quite good looking, and has a really good body (naturally, she is the type who never works out, loves cheesecake, and is fit). She truly did fall for ME as a person, as cheesy as that sounds lol. We have identical interests, both love the same things, and I make her laugh easilly. I was of average body fat when she met me... was by no means ripped, but the tonage was there, and she is in no way one of those... I dont want to call them DUMB girls, as that is a generalization, but she is not a blond, chearleader, go team, i hate reading yall type girl. Shes a nerd, and I am a nerd, but were cool lol. we love each others brains.

    As for the body... well, it didn't take long to get back my motivation. Im hittin the gym with regularity now, and the more I am seeing my gains, the more I want to keep hitting. The most IMPORTANT thing is that I recognized that I was falling off the wagon and I did something about it. I know I will be a life long gym goer, and will never ever ever be what I was before I lose the weight. ever. I will be healthy and athletic all my life, and if a few pounds come here or there well, so be it. I will deal with it accordingly. If life was easy, what fun would that be?

    If all else fails, 20 years from now im sure well have conjured up a miracle fat loss pill

    i wasnt trying to bash your relationship

    just trying to give you some motivation
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