Thread: Appropriate?

Im not sure what forumn/thread thing to post this under, but here goes.

So I have 2 Traumatic Brain Injuries, been through alot, but bodybuilding is my way of dealing with it. It has really helped me. I couldn't do any of it without my family, my motivation, or my God.

So here's my story............
This group is going to give me, Maria Andreu, encouragement and support..... 12/28/00, at the age of 17, in the middle of my senior year of high school, I was hit on the passenger side @50mph (my ex-boyfriend was driving,there was no drinking, we were actually going into a Bailey's gym.) He only had a concusion, I however was left w several broken bones. I was in a coma over a month, and had numerous other injuries, but the worst of the injuries was a Traumatic Brain Injury, which I'll have the rest of my life. I went through 2 years of therapy of all kinds. I walked in graduation, and got a standing ovation.

Then on 9/13/02, my mother was driving me to college and was hit on her side, she passed away a week later, but of other health complications. I sustained a 2nd brain injury, both TBIs were on the frontal lobe of my brain. I was put back into therapy, still going through some. The right side of my body is weaker/slower and I have MANY cognitive deficiets and my speech is greatly affected. Thats why this goal will be such a challenge.

My new goal is to compete in a bodybuilding competition, naturally, not to win, but to come back from this and be the best I can be. I see the patients(that have similar injuries) when I go to therapy, and I realize how lucky I am. That is 1 of my reasons I want to compete. All of your support is greatly appreciated

.................heres my problem/question

So tonight I was working arms, a long sleeved-shirt and a t-shirt over it, with sweatpants, everything covered. I had done some tricep excercises, I had a feeling of rage come over me .......... Theres a 1/2dummy-thing filled with water in the areobics room so I went there, on the way there I started making noises like I was going to cry (but I can't). I took out all my rage, screaming and punching the dummy. I finnally knocked the dummy over. That felt good. I curled up in a ball breathing heavily on floor. The aerobics room is open and wide like its missing a wall so guys kept going to the water foutain and looking atme. I finally calmed down, came out, walked around. Started freaking out, like oh god what do they think of me? So I tried to tell all the muscle guys that I been through something. They were like yeah okay im workng out. I mean thats not what they said. So I just went along with my workout.............I didnt even get to do a 3rd excersice for biceps bc 1 of the staff had to come repremand me.
I was cool about it..... She said I had made a member feel uncomfortable, and they said I had turned over a trash can........Right, well you know this is a gym, I need to vent somewhere, I can't act this way out in public. I take medication, I've in an Institution! I said that loud n clear. She said okay lets goin the office. Where she had take deep breaths and try to calm me down

When I came out, the member who I think it was, was doing cardio. He was some skinny really pale guy w a black sleevless shirt on w a bible verse on it, had glasses, goyte, sorta cut. Would be intimidated by me, thrashing around, and my muscles. I dont know if hes ever seen me before. I went to his treadmill, I looked at him, I said "There wasn't any trash can over there" He goes I dont know what your talking about. I go " whatever"

Good luck in your recovery. Highly suggest Lance Armstrong's book "Its Not About the Bike". May help you as he has been through a simliar experience.