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Gym Idiot Sightings 2009

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  1. #31
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    Oh yeah, I had some of those fuck ups too.

    I did what Danzik did; was in the middle of a DB bench, and arms just when kaplooie for no reason. Drop the weights on my chest, and confused, lifted them up again with no problem, and did 4 more reps.

    My most embarrassing moment was when I tried to do those dumbbell sit-ups. You know, the one where you lay at a specific angle on the bench, hold a single dumbbell behind your head, and attempt to do sit-ups? I got the dumbbell all ready, felt strong, leaned back a bit, and fell straight backwards. Manged to land on my side, instead of on my back, feet straight up. I shot up off the floor, and I don't think anyone saw me. Needless to say, I haven't tried that exercise since.
    "Well, I'd rather be cock monster than impotent."

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Burner02 View Post
    hope so...or a lot of people need to work on their sense of humor...it was funny....
    i was being stupid before a set of squats and forgot to put on a plate, stood up, and only part of the bar came with me.

    oops. only one person saw me, and he was doing hip adductions, so i feel like less of a doofus
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  3. #33
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    Not really a mess up, but pretty damned embarrassing.

    I was doing heavy squats next to a girl that I had been flirting with for a couple weeks. I was really pushing hard, and about the 3rd rep I ripped one so loud that a buddy of mine came in from the cardio room next door to ask if we had heard that.

    Not very romantic.

  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by ability View Post
    Strength training is probably the sport filled with most confident, ignorant and wiseacred people.
    Please don't hate us for being superior

  5. #35
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    Mmm. Well.

    The day I found out the reason why they're called skullcrushers.

    When I first started at the gym I was a smith machine whore because everything was easier on it. A couple of months in, and I decided to start training triceps, and my friend Lewis and I picked skull crushers as our first exercise. He did them using an EZ curl bar and added about 7.5kg on each side (about 16-18lbs). He did his 10 reps and said it was my turn. Now at this point my triceps were really weak and I had tried the EZ curl skullcrushers before and could only load 5kg on each side and bust a nut to complete just 7-8 reps.
    Me being the egomaniac I was, decided to do it on the smith machine so that way I could load more and do it without having to balance it. So I went up to the smith machine and whacked on 7.25 on each side.

    Now at this point I was benching with 10kg each side (40kg total), and my mind being clouded with beating my friend at skullcrushers; I forgot that the bar weighed a good 10kg more than the EZ curl bar and that I was attempting to lift 10kg more than I could anyways.
    So I set up everything, took a good while setting up the bench in the perfect position, adjusting my hands by cm like I knew what I was doing, took a deep breath; unhooked the bar and SLAM!!

    STRAIGHT DOWN INTO MY FOREHEAD!!

    I was lucky that atleast in my attempt to surpass my friend's ego, I provided some resistance for the falling weight.

    To make it worse I couldn't move it either so I was there screaming in pain and desparation for someone to move it for me. All I remember after that apart from the sheer pain and embarassment is someone sarcastically remarking "wow, so that's why they call them skullcrushers" and wave of chuckles following. My session was over.

    The weight room was quite full and some of the guys there at that moment still train now with me. They always bring it up when we talk about the good ol' days.

    I ended up with a bruise line across my forehead for a week and a half and with a severely damaged ego for the rest of the year.
    Last edited by T_man; 03-25-2009 at 08:16 AM.

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by rahaas View Post
    Please don't hate us for being superior
    We here at Global Gym are better than you, and we know it!
    Success leaves clues. People who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results

    Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is what you are doing NOW to solve our problem

    THERE IS NO TOMORROW!
    - Appollo Creed

  7. #37
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    Idiot sighting today:

    Well today was leg day, and we have a small-ish weights room with 3 benches and one of the benches is used for the free bar bench press/squat rack. So I moved the bench out of the way to start doing some squats but some dick came and bench that bench RIGHT NEXT TO THE SQUAT RACK and started doing flyes.....

    So I had to wait for him to finnish each set before doing my set of squats and he was supersetting them with some weird seated reverse flye with free weights, which I doubt did anything for him at the weight he was doing.

    But anyways I'm at my second working set after 3 warmup sets and 1 set. I was doing around 150lbs, which is near my max for 8-10 reps, and as I picked up the bar, which you struggle to on the heavy weights, took a 2 steps backwards but that F***ing same baboon didnt place one of the dumbells back properly and it started rolling towards me so I had to lunge forward and smash the bar on the rack and Lord knows how I didnt die in that accident.

    I asked him to move to another bench because they were all free (was just me him and some other guy using the chest press machine) but the cunt was too stubborn.

    Tell you what though that rage helped me put in a superb workout, went 10lbs heavier on every exercise from last week

  8. #38
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    naw...you shoulda said: your in a bad spot, you're about to get hurt. If he didn't move, let the bar smack him in the face for sheer stupidity...smile, say: told ya so and kept on going.
    Success leaves clues. People who produce outstanding results do specific things to create those results

    Nobody cares what you did yesterday or what you are going to do tomorrow. What is important is what you are doing NOW to solve our problem

    THERE IS NO TOMORROW!
    - Appollo Creed

  9. #39
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    hahaha iceman thats hilarious

  10. #40
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    my favorite guy at the gym is the bald one that wears a power belt doing cardio while also wearing a t shirt that has a picture of a roll of toilet paper and says "thats how i roll"... hahaha

  11. #41
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    We've had a sudden rush of older women in my gym; I dunno what brought them all of a sudden, but they mostly stick to the cardio machines like glue, and I just mind my own business.

    However, there were two that stuck out like a sore thumb. This one woman who's been there every day I seem to be there I nicknamed Skeletor, because she's nothing but skin and bones. She goes on the treadmill for about an hour each time, and walks, not jogs, but WALKS the entire time. Her shoulders are slumped, and flaps of loose skin ripple all over her body when she walks. She always does the same workout, and only uses the treadmill. She also glares at everyone who walks by her.

    The other lady I noticed just confused me. She moved to the Johnson leg press, and proceeded to do two reps, and stop. She then sat for 6 minutes (I counted), looking around, looking confused. She then did two more, and waited another five-six minutes. Also, she didn't grab the handles at the side, she instead pushed on her knee's to help her lift the weight stack. I flinched at every rep she did, wondering how much pressure she was putting on her poor knees. The thing that confused me was that she didn't look all that bad!
    "Well, I'd rather be cock monster than impotent."

  12. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dazino View Post

    The other lady I noticed just confused me. She moved to the Johnson leg press, and proceeded to do two reps, and stop. She then sat for 6 minutes (I counted), looking around, looking confused. She then did two more, and waited another five-six minutes. Also, she didn't grab the handles at the side, she instead pushed on her knee's to help her lift the weight stack. I flinched at every rep she did, wondering how much pressure she was putting on her poor knees. The thing that confused me was that she didn't look all that bad!
    That's a situation you help one out.

  13. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by min0 lee View Post
    That's a situation you help one out.
    I didn't know how to say "Your fucking your knees, you know." In Portuguese.
    "Well, I'd rather be cock monster than impotent."

  14. #44
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    I'm 19 and I graduated last year. I was a 4x All-State Wrestler. I used to be able to beat most of the track/cross country. I fell off the deep end at the end of my senior year, smoking, drinking, womenizing and all that good stuff. I got a membership at the gym about 4 months ago, and I decided to work on cardio before I even touch the weights. I get on the treadmill and I, a 4x All-State Wrestler, rated in the "Top 28" in my state as a senior, I couldn't even keep up with the old/fat ladies (no offense!). I've never felt so stupid. I couldn't run an average pace for more than 10 minutes.
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  15. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by Derricks View Post
    I'm 19 and I graduated last year. I was a 4x All-State Wrestler. I used to be able to beat most of the track/cross country. I fell off the deep end at the end of my senior year, smoking, drinking, womenizing and all that good stuff. I got a membership at the gym about 4 months ago, and I decided to work on cardio before I even touch the weights. I get on the treadmill and I, a 4x All-State Wrestler, rated in the "Top 28" in my state as a senior, I couldn't even keep up with the old/fat ladies (no offense!). I've never felt so stupid. I couldn't run an average pace for more than 10 minutes.
    Just keep working hard, bro. All it takes is dedication. Keep a good diet, keep exercising, and you'll get better. I used to be in a similar situation, with drinking, smoking, and pretty much fucking things up for myself. Now i'm healthier than ever!

    Might want to still lift some weights though. Cardio is good, but don't just stick to it.
    "Well, I'd rather be cock monster than impotent."

  16. #46
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    Dude doing curls and cheating so bad on every rep from 1-8, drop the fucking weight and use some good form.

    The old guys at the gym that walk naked around the locker room. I don't like to see old naked men or any for that matter so put a fucking towel on after you shower.

    The guys that sit on a machine and watch's t.v. while waiting five minutes between sets. Stay at home and watch espn if thats what you want to do.

    And i'll have to add my friend to the list, he's on his first cycle and did put on some size. But i swear everytime i go to his house he is wearing some form of a tank top, from a wife beater to a basketball jersey and is always flexing. Fuck he bugs me now, i think i'll just get him vegetable oil next time...But i'd feel to bad charging him for it.

  17. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by jmorrison View Post
    Not really a mess up, but pretty damned embarrassing.

    I was doing heavy squats next to a girl that I had been flirting with for a couple weeks. I was really pushing hard, and about the 3rd rep I ripped one so loud that a buddy of mine came in from the cardio room next door to ask if we had heard that.

    Not very romantic.
    Now that Chit is funny, I don't care who you are!

  18. #48
    Why so serious?

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    Quote Originally Posted by iceman816 View Post
    lol since we're all confessing..
    I must admit i have not dropped the bench bar on my chest....yet
    But i did have a real embarasing moment a while ago...
    i was on the 45degree machine leg press one day and ...yeh i was doing a great job..
    I was just about to start my last set...when the most gorgious chick walked in ..so i did the normal matcho thing and put a heap more weight on sat on the machine tensed up and gave it shit...but the only thing that moved was my bowels and i let go a huge fart....
    Have small did i feel
    Rofl. This one and jmorrison's story the cake for me. Farting ain't even like letting out a big burp or a huge booger shooting out from breathing hard on an exercise...farting is just embarrassing when you don't plan on doing it. I feel for ya man.

  19. #49
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    Scott Adams (Creator of the Dilbert Comic strip) apparently has joined the club of people who have personally witnessed the old guy blow drying his nuts routine in the locker room...

    Scott Adams blog entry

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