[SIZE=-1] 1. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me. [/SIZE] [SIZE=-1]2. The new girl in my office is a real beauty, and a stripper too, I invited her over for dinner on Friday. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]3. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]4. Bar food again! Kick ass. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]5. I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]6. That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm gonna go over and talk to her. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]7. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then you don't have to mess with it anymore. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]8. I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want'em? [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]9. It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple more pitchers. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]10. Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila Shot off of Stephanie's bare ass. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]11. My mother is going to take care of the tab, so order another round for you and your friends. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]12. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]13. Damn! I love when my pillow smells like your cigars and beer. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]14. You are so much smarter than my father. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]15. If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let me watch football. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]16. Are you sure you've had enough to drink? [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]17. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]18. You're so sexy when you're hung over. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]19. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]20. Let's subscribe to Hustler. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]21. I'll be out painting the house. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]22. I love it when you ride your Harley, I just wish you had more time to ride. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]23. Honey, our new neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come see! [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]24. No, No, I'll take the car to have the oil changed. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]25. Your mother is way better than mine. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]26. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine's Day thing and buy yourself something. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]27. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]28. You need your sleep ya big silly, now stop getting up for the night feedings. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]29. Look! My ass is fatter than yours! [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]30. Let's get rid of my friends and keep all of yours.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]
[/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]3. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]4. Bar food again! Kick ass. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]5. I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]6. That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm gonna go over and talk to her. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]7. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then you don't have to mess with it anymore. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]8. I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want'em? [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]9. It's only the third quarter, you should order a couple more pitchers. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]10. Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila Shot off of Stephanie's bare ass. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]11. My mother is going to take care of the tab, so order another round for you and your friends. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]12. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]13. Damn! I love when my pillow smells like your cigars and beer. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]14. You are so much smarter than my father. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]15. If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let me watch football. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]16. Are you sure you've had enough to drink? [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]17. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]18. You're so sexy when you're hung over. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]19. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]20. Let's subscribe to Hustler. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]21. I'll be out painting the house. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]22. I love it when you ride your Harley, I just wish you had more time to ride. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]23. Honey, our new neighbor's daughter is sunbathing again, come see! [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]24. No, No, I'll take the car to have the oil changed. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]25. Your mother is way better than mine. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]26. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentine's Day thing and buy yourself something. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]27. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]28. You need your sleep ya big silly, now stop getting up for the night feedings. [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]29. Look! My ass is fatter than yours! [/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]30. Let's get rid of my friends and keep all of yours.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]
[/SIZE]
