Ex-Red Sox reliever Julian Tavarez signs with Nationals

[soxmuscle]

Why is this thread worthy, you ask?

Because of this gem of a quote he told to a Washington Post reporter that they actually printed for some hilarious reason:

"Why did I sign with the Nationals? When you go to a club at 4 in the morning, and you're just waiting, waiting, a 600-pounder looks like J-Lo. And to me this is Jennifer Lopez right here. It's 4 in the morning. Too much to drink. So, Nationals: Jennifer Lopez to me."

washingtonpost.com

 

[I Are Baboon]

 

[soxmuscle]

Haha... isn't that great, IAB?

Tavarez has proven time and time again to have no filter and say/do whatever the hell he wants, but it's quite funny to me.

Nationals fans have to love the fact that they're being compared to the 600-pound fat girl in a bar that you try to bring home after having too much to drink.

 

[I Are Baboon]

I think it's funny that he's had no other takers and thinks at this point in his career he can be picky.

J-Lo might be the 600 pounder, but he's also the fat pimpled guy that can't hook up with anyone else. Beggars can't be choosers.

Tavarez was a pretty good utility pitcher for the Sox though and I wish him well.