What do you do when your taking a crap?

[soxmuscle]

I'm starting a thread on IronMagazine right now as I'm taking a huge dump.

Whenever I feel a big one brewing, I always bring my lap top with me. At school, I rent MensHealth magazines from the library and leave them in the bathroom for the week that I have them; I normally read an entire issue after only a couple days worth of dumps.

So, what do you do when you poop?

 

[PainandGain]

Masturbate, naturally.

 

[IronAddict]

I just try to count the splashes.

 

[The Monkey Man]

Moan with pleasure and then Inspect -

 

[maniclion]

I used to bring a book or the comics from the days paper, nothing like laughing at your own farts and laughing at Beetle Bailey, then I started reading books on my Iphone and now I take my Netbook so I can read or add some stuff to my writing journal, then I can transition from the Turdlet to the couch with little interuption......I was going to buy a Kindle until I found out they can erase books from your unit without permission......

 

[lucifuge]

poop.
sometimes I read, but I always poop.

 

[Dale Mabry]

I scramble eggs on a hot plate.

 

[Mudge]

Usually, I push. It takes me about 2 or 3 minutes from start to finish, I don't live in there. Get in and get out.

 

[maxpro2]

Cell phone game. Currently I play Tiger Woods Golf

 

[maniclion]

When I was younger I had to read something even if it was the back of a shampoo bottle, now that I always have my cell phone I never had to resort to that.....

If there was nothing then I would stare at the floor until strange patterns or images would appear....

 

[busyLivin]

I scramble eggs on a hot plate.

 

[Yanick]

When I was younger I had to read something even if it was the back of a shampoo bottle, now that I always have my cell phone I never had to resort to that.....

If there was nothing then I would stare at the floor until strange patterns or images would appear....

Yeah, I need to read something. My bathroom is stocked with Maxim's, Car and Drivers, some Nursing journals my mom gets, a book or two. If I've absolutely read everything in there and can't stand to thumb through the magazines I'll read the ingredients on shampoos, soaps etc. I get some sick twisted pleasure from the big chemistry words. Sometimes I crap in my parents' bathroom, because they put in one of those wall bidet things, and I use that opportunity to work on my reading Russian. I can get caught up on the shitter and spend like an hour there lol.

 

[lnvanry]

I usually get a blumpkin

 

[Little Wing]

go in poop, wipe, flush, and leave. takes less than a minute. what the hell are you guys eating? zebras?

 

[Hoglander]

CRAP!! I forgot to to check for TP before I sat down, AGAIN!

Then I check.

80 % : )

Sometimes....

 

[soxmuscle]

Masturbate, naturally.

I have two friends who made a $1000 dollar bet with eachother about who can get a blumpkin (taking a shit and getting head at same time) first.

ridiculous to me.

 

[soxmuscle]

I usually get a blumpkin

haha.. above

 

[soxmuscle]

go in poop, wipe, flush, and leave. takes less than a minute. what the hell are you guys eating? zebras?

i imagine rose petals falling gracefully into the water.

in other news,

do you use wet wipes?

the shelf life on a pair of white boxer briefs have a shelf life of like two months for me - I think I might start

 

[I Are Baboon]

I have two friends who made a $1000 dollar bet with eachother about who can get a blumpkin (taking a shit and getting head at same time) first.

ridiculous to me.

So was there a winner?

 

[min0 lee]

I think about the Red Sox.

 

[tucker01]

Poker on my Blackberry

 

[irishteen]

Listen to sum quality rap!!

 

[soxmuscle]

So was there a winner?

not yet unless a miracle happened this summer and it slipped their minds when I've talked to them.

I doubt it ever happens. what sane girl... oh wait.. girls aren't sane.

 

[soxmuscle]

I think about the Red Sox offense.

 

[min0 lee]

Return to the Sports thread. I'll be on my best behavior.

 

[AKIRA]

I usually piss when I shit.

 

[min0 lee]

I usually piss when I shit.

From your ass?

 

[AKIRA]

When my asshole wants to confuse me, then I am pissing the entire time.

 

[min0 lee]

The burn!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[IronAddict]

I have two friends who made a $1000 dollar bet with eachother about who can get a blumpkin (taking a shit and getting head at same time) first.

ridiculous to me.

Oh my!

I don't even think that is physically possible. But you've got some nasty ass friends, and these would definately not be the women you bring home to meet mom!