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Greg's hijack thread

Jason Sudeikis Thanks Sex for Weight Loss: Olivia Wilde Is the "Greatest Workout Partner" | Comcast

Jason Sudeikis Thanks Sex for Weight Loss: Olivia Wilde Is the "Greatest Workout Partner"

Jason Sudeikis is all about having a sexy workout plan.

The comedian has lost a considerable amount of weight in recent months, and according to his interview with Elle for their August 2013 issue, he has fianc?e Olivia Wilde (and their strong sex drive) to thank for that.

"The truth is, I'm not getting up an hour earlier and walking on a treadmill. I have the greatest workout partner in the world. And you don't need a gym membership for that kind of workout," he told the mag.

Bow chicka bow wow.

This may not come as a huge shock to some.

You may remember that last October, Wilde revealed that she and her beau "have sex like Kenyan marathon runners," then later said the sex comments were "performance art" (however, Jason told Elle the sexual statement was "accurate").

But it's not just participating in the no-pants dance (or ditching the barbecue sauce on late-night pizza, which he also mentioned) that Sudeikis credits for his healthier lifestyle.

He told Modern Luxury Manhattan magazine recently that, "Being happy, and in love, for me, was the secret. I feel like I returned home to myself as an individual through the process of falling in love with the sweetest woman I've ever known." Awww!

His sweet romantic side showed during the Elle interview also.

When asked if he'd like to tell a story to restore his masculinity (after Wilde went on TV and shared an embarrassing tale of the funnyman falling out of a kayak and getting rescued by fishermen in Jamaica), he said, "I mean, what better story than meeting the girl of your dreams, sweeping her off her feet, and then being strong enough to carry her out? That's my story."

And a damn good one.
 
Sexual Simpsons Jokes - CollegeHumor Article

10 Sexual Jokes On The Simpsons You Might've Missed As A Kid

For many of us who grew up in the 90s, The Simpsons was not only a hilarious, groundbreaking show, but a learning experience. It advanced our knowledge of pop culture well beyond our years (Seriously, how else would most 9-year-olds know about Citizen Kane and Stanley Kubrick movies?) But aside from the dozens of references to movies, TV, and books that we had to ask our parents about, The Simpsons was also loaded with subtle and not-so-subtle sexual references. I recently rewatched the entire series and noted ten particularly sexual jokes that, as a kid, slipped past my freakin' ears.
 
Runner Repeatedly Poops On Man’s Yard in New Mexico

For months, a young woman in Nob Hill, New Mexico has been repeatedly defecating on her neighbor?s yard during her morning run. Her neighbor, a man who wishes to not be identified, first thought it was a homeless person but then set up a video camera and captured the (still unidentified) woman in the act. He told Albuquerque TV news station KOAT, ?This is malicious fecal distribution.?

 
Honda reveals world

Honda reveals world?s fastest lawn mower, capable of 130 MPH

Mowing your lawn used to be one of the most boring tasks in the world. We say ?used to be? because Honda?s U.K. unit has built what could bring heap-loads of awesome into lawn mowing ? the Mean Mower, which they dubbed as the ?world?s fastest? lawn mower. Honda, one of Japan?s leading automakers, claims that this speedy mower can reach speeds of 130 miles per hour (209 km/h), a speed that certainly puts substance behind that claim.

The title for ?world?s fastest mower? ? if there is one ? was first claimed by Bobby Cleveland of the U.S. firm Gold Eagle in September 2010, riding in a custom-made Snapper model reaching a speed of 96.5 mph. Honda says that the Mean Mower registered speeds of over 100 mph during testing in the track, already breaking the speed posted by Cleveland and Gold Eagle. Honda added that their inspiration for the concept was to build a machine that looks like a mower and cuts like a mower, but would be as comfortable in the race track as it is in the lawns of city suburbs.

The design itself was taken from one of Honda?s more conventional models, the HF2620. But that is where the conventional ended and the fun started. Honda then added a custom-made chassis and swapped the standard lawn mower engine with a 1000 cc motorcycle engine used in Honda?s VTR Firestorm, adding around 50% more power to the lowly mower. The cutter deck is made of fiberglass, cutting down the machine?s weight to 308 pounds (140 kg). Other additions were a fuel tank, a high-capacity oil cooler, and a secondary water cooling radiator.

Honda released a YouTube video on Wednesday showing that its new concept mower does exactly what it claims. The video features Scottish racing driver Gordon ?Flash? Shedden in the seat, driving around a lawn doing crazy turns with the Mean Mower. The video is cool and all that, but the actual cutting speed is still a very lazy 15mph, but even that is twice the speed of Honda?s conventional mowers. Honda says that the new mower can go from 0 to 60 mph in about four seconds, but also making a darned awful noise at 130 decibels. At these noise levels, users may actually need protective gear for their ears to avoid permanent hearing loss. There is no news as of now whether this new concept lawn mower will be made available to the public.

 
Gregzs said:
Runner Repeatedly Poops On Man?s Yard in New Mexico

For months, a young woman in Nob Hill, New Mexico has been repeatedly defecating on her neighbor?s yard during her morning run. Her neighbor, a man who wishes to not be identified, first thought it was a homeless person but then set up a video camera and captured the (still unidentified) woman in the act. He told Albuquerque TV news station KOAT, ?This is malicious fecal distribution.?

Click to expand...

Runners can be very disgusting people at times

I used to work in Waikiki renting exotic cars while I went to college and every year in Dec. during the Honolulu Marathon our car lot was at the 1/3 of the way point of the race we would get a wave of the first pro runners, a few would run into the park next to us and piss all over any tree they could find but I think most were so dedicated they'd piss themselves and just try to dilute their shorts with water. Then a little while later you'd get the semi-pros/seasoned amateurs who aren't too worried about time, but don't have time to wait for a line at the restroom. These were the worst, they came pretty much in a consistent wave for several minutes, they would run into our parking lot next to cars, in the bushes by the gate, anywhere and just let loose. Men and women, just pissing right there like it wasn't our place of business, like this it was Saturday 2am and the drunk hoards were spilling out of the bars, like this was gay ol' Paris and pissing on sidewalks and alleyways is perfectly acceptable behavior. But to top it off some of these animals were dropping deuces, and not wiping. Some did, they'd tear part of their number tag they wear to identify they are in the race, or tear their underwear or part of their shirt, wipe the shit from their ass and just leave it. The first year it caught us by surprise and we had to hose off the lot for almost an hour and then use a broom and soap we washed the cars with to cover the stench. The next year we were prepared we set up cars as a barricade to the lot and sat out there with hoses and sprayed at people who tried to get around. At one point our defenses were overun and a few pissers got thru, but we held off the rest. The 3rd year we did the same except this time we had cameras to take photos for evidence because we had complained to the promoter the first time and they ignored us the next year, after that year and complaints to the City council by other business owners along the route the promoter rented more porta-shitters to be dispersed along the route. It was gross misconduct by those runners though.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 2
 
17 More People You See At Every Nerd Convention

Illustrator Julia Lepetit and writer Andrew Bridgman of Dorkly have created the funny comic, ?17 More People You See At Every Nerd Convention.? This is an update to Dorkly?s 2011 comic titled ?Fifteen People You?ll See At Every Video Game/Comic/Nerd Convention.?
 
10 Awesomest Photos of Reverse Graffiti | HEAVY

10 Awesomest Photos of Reverse Graffiti

What is 'reverse graffiti'? According to Wikipedia , reverse graffiti, also known as clean tagging, dust tagging, grime writing, green graffiti or clean advertising, is a method of creating temporary or semi permanent images on walls or other surfaces by removing dirt from a surface. AKA art from dirt! Check out these awesome examples.
 
8 of the raunchiest TV shows in network TV history - Guyism

8 of the raunchiest TV shows in network TV history

Raunchy TV shows have long been a hallmark of cable TV, which has always sort of been the Wild West of entertainment given that the law ? aka the FCC ? is not allowed to interfere. But that hasn?t been the case with network TV, which has managed to maintain a much tamer environment, safe for mom and grandma, the church lady, and everyone else who gets the vapors whenever there?s an exposed ankle beamed at them through the magic idiot box. Still, there have been a few shows in the long, mostly boring history of network TV that have managed to shock and offend, and while they may not be as cutting edge or as debauched as their cable TV counterparts, they have still managed to be eight of the raunchiest TV shows in network TV history. Let us salute them.
 
OMG !!! VERY EASY WAY TO CLEAN !! WOW

Did you know that every 30 days it is necessary to clean the computer screen from the inside? Many people ignore this fact and do not know how. Manufacturers take advantage of this ignorance to increase their sales. My IT guy shared this and said feel free to share with my contacts this utility. To clean the screen from the inside, just click this link:

http://www.lingdao.fr/outils/nettoyeurecran/cleanscreen.swf
 
Compilation of Predictions For the Future from Films of the 20s and 30s

 
How Much Caffeine in a Cup of Coffee - Coffee from Dunkin' to Starbucks - Thrillist Nation

tl-horizontal_main
 
Muscle Gelz Transdermals
IronMag Labs Prohormones
12 Unwritten Social Rules You Need To Follow

 
Food competition for geek week

 
Eating At Your Desk Is Making You More Stressed And Less Creative, Study Shows

Eating At Your Desk Is Making You More Stressed And Less Creative, Study Shows

If you spend every workday eating a sad-looking salad at your desk while still staring at your screen, you're not alone -- along with the death of the 9-to-5 job, the lunch break has vanished from many employees' work schedules. According to a 2011 survey by human resources consulting firm Right Management, only one in three American workers take a lunch break -- leaving 65 percent of employees either eat at their desks or not eat at all.

But your lunch habits can make a big difference in your work life, according to a German study recently published in the journal PLOS ONE. Researchers at Humboldt University in Berlin explored the psychological consequences of meal situations, looking at how lunchtime eating circumstances affected thinking and emotional states.

Of the 32 female test participants, half ate alone in an office and half went out for a leisurely sit-down meal with others. The meals were eaten in completely different contexts: The lunch consumed in the bland office environment was eaten alone in a short period of time, whereas at the restaurant, subjects were given time to select and consume the meal in the company of others. The restaurant meal also concluded with a short walk back to the lab.

After the meals, researchers measured semantic memory, cognitive control and error processing, and processing of emotional facial expressions, and subjects filled out a questionnaire ranking their mood. The researchers found that people who enjoyed the restaurant meal reported increased feelings of relaxation, and also reduced cognitive control, allowing the subjects to better process facial expressions -- potentially increasing their creativity and connection to others.

?Reduced cognitive control is a disadvantage when close self-monitoring of performance and detailed attention to errors is required, such as in numerical processing," the researchers concluded. "In other situations, an attenuation of cognitive control may be advantageous, such as when social harmony or creativity is desired.?

But leaving your desk for lunch isn't just a relaxing way to break up the day. Although a long off-site lunch might seem like a productivity-killer, it could actually help you get more done, Fast Company reported.

?You don?t have time to skip your lunch break,? Tom Rath, author of the forthcoming book :Eat, Move, Sleep," told Fast Company. ?What you do at lunch can either make or break the rest of the day.?
 
Bizarre Illegal Mountain Villa Built on Rooftop of Beijing Apartment Tower

Bizarre Illegal Mountain Villa Built on Rooftop of Beijing Apartment Tower

Over the past six years, a sprawling 2-story mountain villa has been constructed?without government permission?high atop a 26-story apartment building in Beijing. Covered in rocks and trees, the 8,600-square-foot home belongs to Chinese doctor and businessman Zhang Biqing. For years neighbors in the building have complained to authorities about the unauthorized home and the cracks, leaks, and other problems it is apparently causing to the building. Their complaints came to nothing until photos of the villa surfaced on social media in China, resulting in press coverage, and finally this Monday, a demolition order by the government.

 
The Builders of This Spanish Skyscraper Forgot the Elevator (Updated)


The Builders of This Spanish Skyscraper Forgot the Elevator (Updated)

Update: It looks as though the building may have elevators after all! According to Barcepundit?and despite an El Pais article that plainly states the opposite?there are, in fact, 11 elevators in total. [h/t Twitter]

The Intempo skyscraper in Benidorm, Spain?standing proud in this image?was designed to be a striking symbol of hope and prosperity, to signal to the rest of the world that the city was escaping the financial crisis. Sadly, the builders forgot to include a working elevator.

In fairness, the entire construction process has been plagued with problems, reports Ecnonomia. Initially funded by a bank called Caixa Galicia, the finances were recently taken over by Sareb ? Spain?s so-called "bad bank" ? when the mortgage was massively written down.

In part, that was a function of the greed surrounding the project. Initially designed to be a mere 20 storeys tall, the developers got over-excited and pushed the height way up: now it boasts 47 storeys, and will include 269 homes.

But that push for more accommodation came at a cost. The original design obviously included specifications for an elevator big enough for a 20-storey building. In the process of scaling things up, however, nobody thought to redesign the elevator system?and, naturally, a 47-storey building requires more space for its lifts and motor equipment. Sadly, that space doesn't exist.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, the architects working on the project have resigned, and it remains unclear exactly how the developers will solve the problem. Can we recommend the stairs?

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Life of a Stranger Who Stole My Phone, Tumblr Blog Uploads Photos From Stolen Phone in Dubai

Life of a Stranger Who Stole My Phone, Tumblr Blog Uploads Photos From Stolen Phone in Dubai

A German tourist?s phone was stolen about four months ago on a trip to Ibiza, Spain, but the thief, Hafid, didn?t delete the Dropbox app or disable the automatic upload feature. As a result, every photo Hafid has taken in Dubai has been uploaded directly to the owner?s computer. Since, the owner created Life of a Stranger Who Stole My Phone, a Tumblr blog full of photos of Hafid.


This is the inspiring story of Hafid from Dubai, the douchebag who stole my phone. He forgot to switch off the camera upload function, thats why we will enjoy a deep insight into his life.

20130809-15034865-hafid1.jpg
 
World

World?s Unluckiest Man Gets Attacked by a Shark

They say lightning never strikes the same place twice, and your odds of winning last night?s Powerball were about 1 in 175 million. Tell that to the guy who was just bit by a shark after surviving both a lightning strike and an encounter with a rattlesnake!

Erik Norrie was snorkeling and spear fishing in the Bahamas with his family when a shark suddenly bit his leg, tearing out a chunk and leaving a pool of Norrie?s blood in the water. ?You could see a piece of my leg in his mouth,? said Norrie.

Norrie?s quick thinking, and brave, father-in-law jumped into the water and got between Norrie and the shark, protecting him from another attack. Meanwhile, his wife and four daughters pulled him to safety aboard the boat and quickly fashioned a tourniquet out of the bands of the spear gun.

Norrie described the terrifying experience, saying that he truly thought he was going to die. ?I didn?t keep my head cool. The Lord kept my head cool because I couldn?t have done it without Him,? he said.

Doctors believe Norrie?s leg will heal.
 
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