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Which One Are YOU?

Big Smoothy

Windy City
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Joined
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Every country has it's "rednecks." The backwater kuntry cousins who don't think very deeply and have a quirky, different take on life.

In US, there are different names for different regions. Most references are to white people only. Disparaging any other folks would is considered racist and highly discouraged.

Hillbilly -- Apocryphal attribution to isolated denizens of Appalachian Mountains,(Eastern USA) descendants of some of the earliest Scotch-English settlers, who seem to have had some proclivity for naming their children "William" (familiarly "Bill") and some not inconsiderable inclination to incestuous sexual congress. More recently, the term is used to describe any rural resident,especially in the Southern USA and particularly those living in rather rough-hewn conditions, embracing noticeably parochial ideologies and a generally hostile attitude.

Hick -- derogatory slang term for lower class whites raised in rural areas, usually within trailer parks or hog farms. Generally used more for Midwesterners than Southerners

Bumpkin
-- a derivative of bum, it may come from either the Middle Dutch word bommekijn, "a little barrel," or the Flemish word boomken, "shrub." Such a person may easily have been compared to a block of wood.

Mountain man
-- to let go of ones physical appearance (large beard, dirty hair, horrible hygiene) Usually during a state of depression, or extreme laziness. But also a reference to incredible independence and survivor instinct.

Hayseed -- Derogatory term for a rural member of the American working class. This cutesy term has a demonizing impact on class consciousness, segregating the rural worker from his urban counterpart. A slow witted or unstylish person from the rural midwest.

Cletus -- A man's name. Inbred white trash with money. Britney Spears' husband; a character on The Simpsons.

Yokel
-- A bucktoothed, hillbilly, river rat, (slack jawwed yokel) Someone who was born in the country and isn't street smart. Talks with a goofy southern accent. Eats squirrel. Usually named Cletus (the slack jawwed yokel).

Finally, you might be one of these guys if:

You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.

The biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

Your wife weighs more then your refrigerator.

You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.

You mow your lawn and find a car.

You can spit without opening your mouth.

Going to the bathroom in the middle of the night involves putting on shoes and a jacket and grabbing a flashlight.

You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

Taking a dip has nothing to do with water.

There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.

You take a fishing pole to Sea World.

The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.

You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.

You've ever shot somebody over a mall parking space.

Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.

Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

You think mud rasslin' should be an Olympic sport.

The receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.

More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

You think the stock market has a fence around it.

You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

You've ever lost a loved one to kudzu.

Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.

Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.

Your home has more miles on it than your car.

Your Christmas tree is still up in February.

You've ever been arrested for loitering.

There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.

You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.

You've ever shot anyone for looking at you.

You own a homemade fur coat.

Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

Your momma has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

You've totaled every car you've ever owned.
 
Every country has it's "rednecks." The backwater kuntry cousins who don't think very deeply and have a quirky, different take on life.

In US, there are different names for different regions. Most references are to white people only. Disparaging any other folks would is considered racist and highly discouraged.

Hillbilly -- Apocryphal attribution to isolated denizens of Appalachian Mountains,(Eastern USA) descendants of some of the earliest Scotch-English settlers, who seem to have had some proclivity for naming their children "William" (familiarly "Bill") and some not inconsiderable inclination to incestuous sexual congress. More recently, the term is used to describe any rural resident,especially in the Southern USA and particularly those living in rather rough-hewn conditions, embracing noticeably parochial ideologies and a generally hostile attitude.

Hick -- derogatory slang term for lower class whites raised in rural areas, usually within trailer parks or hog farms. Generally used more for Midwesterners than Southerners

Bumpkin
-- a derivative of bum, it may come from either the Middle Dutch word bommekijn, "a little barrel," or the Flemish word boomken, "shrub." Such a person may easily have been compared to a block of wood.

Mountain man
-- to let go of ones physical appearance (large beard, dirty hair, horrible hygiene) Usually during a state of depression, or extreme laziness. But also a reference to incredible independence and survivor instinct.

Hayseed -- Derogatory term for a rural member of the American working class. This cutesy term has a demonizing impact on class consciousness, segregating the rural worker from his urban counterpart. A slow witted or unstylish person from the rural midwest.

Cletus -- A man's name. Inbred white trash with money. Britney Spears' husband; a character on The Simpsons.

Yokel
-- A bucktoothed, hillbilly, river rat, (slack jawwed yokel) Someone who was born in the country and isn't street smart. Talks with a goofy southern accent. Eats squirrel. Usually named Cletus (the slack jawwed yokel).

Finally, you might be one of these guys if:

You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.

The biggest fashion risk you take is which plaid you'll wear to the 4-H Fair.

You have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

Your wife weighs more then your refrigerator.

You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it has turned yellow.

You mow your lawn and find a car.

You can spit without opening your mouth.

Going to the bathroom in the middle of the night involves putting on shoes and a jacket and grabbing a flashlight.

You go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.

Taking a dip has nothing to do with water.

There are more than ten lawsuits currently pending against your dog.

You take a fishing pole to Sea World.

The hood and one door are a different color from the rest of your car.

You've ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.

You've ever shot somebody over a mall parking space.

Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap.

Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

You think mud rasslin' should be an Olympic sport.

The receptionist checks the rat traps at your place of business.

More than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.

You think the stock market has a fence around it.

You think the O.J. trial was the big Sunkist and Minutemaid taste test.

You've ever lost a loved one to kudzu.

Your boat has not left the driveway in 15 years.

Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.

Your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.

You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

You've ever used a toilet seat as a picture frame.

Your home has more miles on it than your car.

Your Christmas tree is still up in February.

You've ever been arrested for loitering.

There is a stuffed possum anywhere in your house.

You hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.

You've ever shot anyone for looking at you.

You own a homemade fur coat.

Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

Your momma has "ammo" on her Christmas list.

You've totaled every car you've ever owned.

For once Big, I'm liking it!!! good stuff, and it's sooo true!!!
 
OK, can you add anything more?
 
Your front porch collapses and kills more than three dogs.

oh shit. :lol: these are great.
 
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