For all the Fathers with a young Daughter

[crazyotter]

If someone could make this bigger I`d appreciate it. No clue how to do it.

 

[DOMS]

 

[DetMuscle]

I printed it for potential daters of my daughter

 

[crazyotter]

Please allow 4-6 YEARS for processing lol

 

[bigbenj]

bwahahahaha awesome!

 

[CG]

Lol good one

 

[IronAddict]

lol that's great

 

[Standard Donkey]

all of my friends who are girls have been EPIC disappointments to their fathers..


fuck i hope i dont have daughters

 

[crazyotter]

all of my friends who are girls have been EPIC disappointments to their fathers..


fuck i hope i dont have daughters

Its been proven that the relationship or lack there of with the father will play a huge roll in the daughters life. Almost like son`s relationships with their mothers can cause them issues later on in life.

The phrase "daddy issues" is 100% on target.

Having a daughter is a blessing and a curse for every father. There are just so many more thing to worry about with a girl. My next better be a boy! I can`t handle having another girl lol

 

[Standard Donkey]

Its been proven that the relationship or lack there of with the father will play a huge roll in the daughters life. Almost like son`s relationships with their mothers can cause them issues later on in life.

The phrase "daddy issues" is 100% on target.

Having a daughter is a blessing and a curse for every father. There are just so many more thing to worry about with a girl. My next better be a boy! I can`t handle having another girl lol

cept the most whorish of the girls are the ones with the best relationships with their fathers.. at least in my circles

 

[Eiserner Hahn]

saved to desktop for future printing

 

[SloppyJ]

Normally the ones with daddy issues are fucked up beyond belief. A dad's relationship with his daughter is a huge factor in their life. I didn't realize this until a few years ago.

 

[crazyotter]

cept the most whorish of the girls are the ones with the best relationships with their fathers.. at least in my circles

Your circles are uncommon then. The stronger the relationship with the father (who is a respectable and stand up guy) the less likely the girl is to try drugs and alcohol, also way less likely to get pregnant at a young age. The girls who are "buddy buddy" with their mothers but have an unstable or non existent relationship with their fathers are way more likely to engage in the above stated activities at a younger age.

 

[crazyotter]

Normally the ones with daddy issues are fucked up beyond belief. A dad's relationship with his daughter is a huge factor in their life. I didn't realize this until a few years ago.

Very true. They will associate every man in their life with their father in a good or bad way.

 

[DOMS]

The form reminds me of these classic rules (emphasis mine):

Ten Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

 

[crazyotter]

Rule 2 and 8 are my fav

 

[Zaphod]

A couple years ago I told my daughter the rules for dating. So far no dates. Before they leave they must leave a $100 deposit. If she is late the kid loses his deposit. If she arrives home in any state other than the one she left in he will be digging a hole. He'll know when it's done when he sees the flash.

There are more but those are a couple major ones.

 

[DOMS]

A couple years ago I told my daughter the rules for dating. So far no dates. Before they leave they must leave a $100 deposit. If she is late the kid loses his deposit. If she arrives home in any state other than the one she left in he will be digging a hole. He'll know when it's done when he sees the flash.

There are more but those are a couple major ones.

When my daughter turned 12, I gave her some advice.

Me: When you start dating, date guys you don't like.
Her: Why?
Me: So that when I kill them, you won't feel so bad about it.


Jokes aside, I've made it a point to be friendly with her first boyfriend (and her friends in general). As a matter of fact, I've been told that, "I'm the coolest parent they know."

 

[heckler7]

When my daughter turned 12, I gave her some advice.

Me: When you start dating, date guys you don't like.
Her: Why?
Me: So that when I kill them, you won't feel so bad about it.


Jokes aside, I've made it a point to be friendly with her first boyfriend (and her friends in general). As a matter of fact, I've been told that, "I'm the coolest parent they know."

I smart to be friendly with your kids friends its important to see what kind of people your kids assiate with.

 

[maniclion]

True Story: One night my sister had a couple boys outside her window at 2am...my dad heard some noises outside and peeked through the curtains and saw them, so he came in my room borrowed my toy M16(looked real just a little smaller) and snuck around the side of the house and then came running at them with the toy gun in the air. They screamed and bolted, one boy made it over the chain link fence, the other kid got his already ripped jeans caught on the fence and went head first into the ground, his front teeth went through his bottom lip, they were loose but not knocked out and he got a bunch of stitches too. That same guy came by about a week later with his friends to see my sister when my dad wasn't home, he wouldn't even enter the yard and kept thinking every car coming down the street was my dad.

 

[CG]

Printing this thread for all my friends with daughters

 

[crazyotter]

True Story: One night my sister had a couple boys outside her window at 2am...my dad heard some noises outside and peeked through the curtains and saw them, so he came in my room borrowed my toy M16(looked real just a little smaller) and snuck around the side of the house and then came running at them with the toy gun in the air. They screamed and bolted, one boy made it over the chain link fence, the other kid got his already ripped jeans caught on the fence and went head first into the ground, his front teeth went through his bottom lip, they were loose but not knocked out and he got a bunch of stitches too. That same guy came by about a week later with his friends to see my sister when my dad wasn't home, he wouldn't even enter the yard and kept thinking every car coming down the street was my dad.

I would have shit my pants if some crazy dad came charging at me with an assault rifle! Lol. That's a funny story. Did your sister get in trouble too?

 

[maniclion]

I would have shit my pants if some crazy dad came charging at me with an assault rifle! Lol. That's a funny story. Did your sister get in trouble too?

She was already grounded for sneaking out a few nights before that with Spock's(Leonard Nimoy's) daughter...

 

[fullrutt]

Its been proven that the relationship or lack there of with the father will play a huge roll in the daughters life. Almost like son`s relationships with their mothers can cause them issues later on in life.

The phrase "daddy issues" is 100% on target.

Having a daughter is a blessing and a curse for every father. There are just so many more thing to worry about with a girl. My next better be a boy! I can`t handle having another girl lol

Man I 100% agree... I would
Not change having my beautiful
Lil girl... But I know she is going to e trouble... We are very close tho she
Is a daddy's girl already in boxing but my wife puts her in dance, cheer and all the other stuff she did...

 

[maniclion]

Maybe it was his step-daughter, I can't remember.....whats weird is that Data(Brent Spiner) went to the High School hey were going to at the time. 2 Star Trek actors tied to a place in Texas...