Do you avoid women with kids?

[Doublebase]

If she's hot enough.

 

[Blooming Lotus]

I think any man in his right mind would agree that it's better to be with a woman that does not have a child, like a friend of mine explained to me:'' It's aweful, everytime you see that kid, it's a reminder that she, the woman that you love, has been f*cked by another man and he came inside of her!''...Lol
But I must admit, if the girl was hot as hell, who cares if she had a young little child? I know of this guy who is butt-ugly (although he thinks he is all that) and he hooked up with this beautiful skinny model-type young girl who has a baby...In my opinion, he got way lucky!

If you were hoping for a virgin we apologise. If you were thinking that having been made privildge dto loving a kid and putting us all through a situation like that doesn't mean we might have a more reasonable chance of putting a future scenario together where more of the potential pitfalls in life surrouunding how thos things happen haven't been learnt and catered for and is a goood thing of a matured growth that we hope you might manage to wrap your own head around sometime.. then us as supermodels or super athletes or financially independant and professionally successful ppl or otherwise, you had buckleys with us anyway. The privilige is youurs.. and with that kind of attitude.. likewise to ouurselves it's not likely to be. Double D is right.. but if that 's just your emotional and mental capacity at the moment.. TTT. ..hey,.. do you think a mans ability or capacity to be a good father is a plus or minus for a potential women to think of you???? @). No wonder so many woman don't want to have kids (with) or sleep with jerks like yourself... go crazy wondering why if you like.

Blooming tianshi lotus.

 

[Little Wing]

everytime you see that kid, it's a reminder that she, the woman that you love, has been f*cked by another man and he came inside of her!''...Lol

i pity the child that is unfortunate enough to have this sorry excuse for a human being in it's life.

 

[Mista]

I think any man in his right mind would agree that it's better to be with a woman that does not have a child, like a friend of mine explained to me:'' It's aweful, everytime you see that kid, it's a reminder that she, the woman that you love, has been f*cked by another man and he came inside of her!''...Lol
But I must admit, if the girl was hot as hell, who cares if she had a young little child? I know of this guy who is butt-ugly (although he thinks he is all that) and he hooked up with this beautiful skinny model-type young girl who has a baby...In my opinion, he got way lucky!

Many girls without kids have had this done to them.

 

[clemson357]

If I wanted to pay for someone else's mistakes, I'd just vote socialist... I mean democrat. More crying and bitching, but they don't puke as often.

 

[clemson357]

In all seriousness, if I were still looking, I would be avoiding women with kids at all cost. Its just too much baggage, too much hassle, with no plus side. If I am going to put the effort into a child, I want it to be my own.

 

[Blooming Lotus]

If I wanted to pay for someone else's mistakes, I'd just vote socialist... I mean democrat. More crying and bitching, but they don't puke as often.

That's just it. Like all the B.S. that Dont stop got given a hard time recently for. Who do you blame for it??.. It's only been in the last 20 and 10 and 5 years that there's really even been any media for discussing that it 's been happening and the stats available on disfunctional families where most ppl doo have baggage of one type of other that effects their head and emotional balance and life perspectives and how they structure a partnership and put a life together..let alone what causes it all.. orr what to do to avoid it in future or break generational cycles of it.

I am suure that if I looked closely enough at your life and upbringing and whatever, that I'd find some of youur own shit that a partner would also have to carry and work with.
It's funny what you find in closets but at least with ppl who have kids it's all much more out in the open.

When I'm modeling and looking like I should be ( which I probably might not ever do again for a living) and have everything else going on I need to, you're exactly the type of guy who'd be hurt not understanding where you 're ego comprimises your attractiveness to Us. and ppl wonder why some of us stay single .. Im sure you might likely have no idea whaat the hell I'm talking about about you or how you set your own life up why in perspective of where you are in life, but there are plennty of women without kids who might take you on wiith all of your own b.s. and not even call it that anyway so I guess it doesn't even matter. if you don't like and respect us regardless then you don't deserve to be with us anyway...and if you can't get your head out of your ass and see where youu fall short or aren't the kind of situation wee'd like to take such an intimate part in and would be willing to work toward improving that and therefore your own postion as a real and good prospect, then right back atchya. .and I bet you'll never even know why. .. in fact you remind me of my millionaire ex who got rich and hot off mummy and daddy's titty and still wonders why I wont f*ck him. Some ppl just dO nOt get it!.! I'd rather a reeal man who sorted ( or is willing to sort) his shit out aany day!.. Cry baby mentally weak Head cases turn me off I guess.

peace.

Blooming tianshi lotus.

 

[BoneCrusher]

i pity the child that is unfortunate enough to have this sorry excuse for a human being in it's life.

He needs your help LW ... very very badly.

 

[I Are Baboon]

If I was single, I might date a woman if she had kids, but I'd proceed with caution. My wife and I don't have kids because neither of us want the responsibility. Since I'm married and don't want kids, I can't imagine being single and wanting them. Raising someone else's kids is something that I would really not be interested in, but if I was attracted to her by all other counts, I'd give her a chance and see where the relationship went.

 

[Double D]

I can understand not wanting someone elses kids, but theres a huge difference in putting it the way IAB puts it compared to the way the other guy put it.

 

[I Are Baboon]

I can understand not wanting someone elses kids, but theres a huge difference in putting it the way IAB puts it compared to the way the other guy put it.

He's about as bright as the inside of a cave.

 

[Double D]

No doubt about that!

 

[Plateau_Max]

Did you know that if you have more mirrors in a room you can save money on your energy bill because there's less of a need for extra lighting? I just thought of that.

Anyway my friend is currently dating a girl that has a young child. I felt the need to give my perspective on this whole thing because I'm 23 years old and so far it seems the only ones giving good analytical perspectives are at least 27. So about my friend. He's been dating this girl for about 8 months now, and I'll note he's my best friend in the world outside of my blood relatives. I call and talk to him and he mentions things about her having a child like how she'll get mad at him for not being a bigger part of her kid's life and he doesn't spend enough time with him... I mean the guy is 22 years old and never dated a girl with children before, and she knows this.

One thing I think a lot of girls who have kids don't realize is they have had this child for a while. A guy who just starts dating her is going to be new to the parenting game whereas she has been playing the role of the parent for the child's entire life to include the subsequent 9 months of preparing herself for it while she was pregnant. He's a good guy and he's making an effort but he's also active duty military and still very young. If a girl has a child she needs to put the child first, and he knows this, but I think it's wrong for them to expect a guy to be a good parent like figure after only a few months of dating.

This is only one example but the girls I've dated who had a kid or two showed the same feelings about it. They were always openly admiting to be looking for someone who's "going to be good for their child" I mean that's sort of a beat around the bush way of saying "looking for a father figure". Most guys our age aren't going to be ready for that, and even if they are willing, it's going to take some time before they're GOOD at it.

If a girl is a single mother, there's pretty much a 99% chance the real father is a piece of crap that ruined the relationship bad. The reason this matters is because it's more difficult to get the girl to start trusting you and being good with you because she'll be much more on the defense due to some douchebag leaving her with a child.

 

[Double D]

I started dating my wife (who had Kyla (my daughter)) 3 years ago whenever I was 22. She did put Kyla first, which was fine with me. Maybe you can call me mature for my age, but the one thing I did understand was just that. But I did things that most guys wouldnt. I asked to take her daughter to the park whenever she was at work, I took her on dates with us, I bought her things, I basically made her mine once I felt like the time was right. You have to be careful with this (for the childs sake). Once you let yourself in they will cling to you. And it would be very easy to hurt the little ones feelings if you are their mommy didnt get along and had to break up. Its always good to be nice to the child and do things with her/him, but if there comes a time and a point you want out and the child has bonded it would be super tough, and horrible for him/her. And in my case Kyla's biological father was not around (we like to refer to him as a sperm donor). So it was easier because I didnt have to give up my time with the both of them so she would have time with her father. I got lucky in that aspect of it!

 

[Plateau_Max]

Yeah see you really did luck out in that sense. The scene was also sort of set for you it would seem. You recognized the fact that once you started "making her yours" that it would be hard on her if things didn't work out with the mother and therefor you would have had to already have built up the idea that you had a good chance for a future with her.

My friend on the other hand doesn't see this girl as marriage material (things like she doesn't go to college, doesn't have any long term goals, doesn't have a very good job, etc) plus him being in the military and planning on getting out in less than 2 years and returning to California (he's in Oklahoma right now) it's just not the kind of thing that's really going to last. Being 22 he shouldn't have to treat every girl like a potential wife either so it's not like he's being cruel by dating a girl without intending on getting married.

 

[Double D]

If she doesnt seem like someone he could be with then I wouldnt think he should continue.....simple reason is if he gets attached to her little one, and vice versa, then its a tough thing all around!

 

[AKIRA]

Double, that is some bold shit right there. If I felt like that, id have no problem dating women with kids. Youre 1 in a million.

In all seriousness, if I were still looking, I would be avoiding women with kids at all cost. Its just too much baggage, too much hassle, with no plus side. If I am going to put the effort into a child, I want it to be my own.

All in all, I agree 100%. Unless getting hooked and in love with the kid is a plus, sure. But if you break up with the mom, its makes it that much more hard. Now you miss two people, instead of one.

 

[Double D]

Thank you.

I dont know if I mentioned it yet or not, but I adopted her about 2 years ago or so. I am sure a few of you remember the thread I had on her about my wife having a brain tumor. Well its only a matter of time before she has to have surgery again and I wanted Kyla to be legally mine as well, just in case!

 

[Little Wing]

Cry baby mentally weak Head cases turn me off I guess.

peace.

Blooming tianshi lotus.

 

[Little Wing]

Did you know that if you have more mirrors in a room you can save money on your energy bill because there's less of a need for extra lighting? I just thought of that.

Anyway my friend is currently dating a girl that has a young child. I felt the need to give my perspective on this whole thing because I'm 23 years old and so far it seems the only ones giving good analytical perspectives are at least 27. So about my friend. He's been dating this girl for about 8 months now, and I'll note he's my best friend in the world outside of my blood relatives. I call and talk to him and he mentions things about her having a child like how she'll get mad at him for not being a bigger part of her kid's life and he doesn't spend enough time with him... I mean the guy is 22 years old and never dated a girl with children before, and she knows this.

One thing I think a lot of girls who have kids don't realize is they have had this child for a while. A guy who just starts dating her is going to be new to the parenting game whereas she has been playing the role of the parent for the child's entire life to include the subsequent 9 months of preparing herself for it while she was pregnant. He's a good guy and he's making an effort but he's also active duty military and still very young. If a girl has a child she needs to put the child first, and he knows this, but I think it's wrong for them to expect a guy to be a good parent like figure after only a few months of dating.

This is only one example but the girls I've dated who had a kid or two showed the same feelings about it. They were always openly admiting to be looking for someone who's "going to be good for their child" I mean that's sort of a beat around the bush way of saying "looking for a father figure". Most guys our age aren't going to be ready for that, and even if they are willing, it's going to take some time before they're GOOD at it.

If a girl is a single mother, there's pretty much a 99% chance the real father is a piece of crap that ruined the relationship bad. The reason this matters is because it's more difficult to get the girl to start trusting you and being good with you because she'll be much more on the defense due to some douchebag leaving her with a child.

i think if a mom decides to let any guy into her and her child(ren)'s life she then needs to see how his relationship with the child develops on its own and not push it. a lot of guys will try to use me being a single parent by saying "don't you think they need a father figure?" "he should have a male role model around"

i just think children deserve people around them that honestly enjoy them and i guarantee you a good mom is way more picky about who is around her kids than you guys are whether a chick has kids or not. a guy that looks at a child and sees " oh boo hoo another guy came in my chick" or anything less than what a great little person you have had the privilege of meeting doesn't stand an ice cubes chance in hell with us anyway.

 

[Double D]

Good post LW!

 

[Little Wing]

thank you Double D, yours are pretty spot on too.

 

[Double D]

It is very easy to talk about something that makes you happy.

 

[Little Wing]

my stepfather hated me n my brothers. he beat the crap out of us almost daily. blood bruises... emotional torture like killing our pets when he wanted to hurt us. guess this thread gives us a glimpse into the type of mentality behind some of that. he just wanted to fuck our mom. it's pretty pathetic that anyone can look into the eyes of a child n not see the child at all.

 

[Double D]

A man who beats kids is not a man at all.....same goes for a man who puts his hands on a woman. For a mother they need to take responsibility as well. This goes both ways. They had their child first and need to date responsibly. They need to know when it is a good time to meet thier child, and they need to know how much time is a ok time to spend away from their child. Normally single moms spend tons of time with their children and thats all they know. And to simply stop seeing their kids all together for days at a time would be detremintal.

 

[iMan323]

I stay away from women with kids and pregnant women.

 

[AKIRA]

I stay away from women with kids and pregnant women.

For some reason this just sounds hilarious to me.

Pregant women frighten me.

There was a thread on cycleforums YEARS ago about men who find that shit really really attractive. Needless to say, that thread ended up being a slaughterhouse.

 

[MCx2]

There was a thread on cycleforums YEARS ago about men who find that shit really really attractive. Needless to say, that thread ended up being a slaughterhouse.

Yeah, and I was the culprit.

 

[crazy_enough]

My wife didnt want children. To have or raise! She was 29 when we met and had succeeded up until then

I have two wonderful children, now 9 & 10 yrs old...Almost 1 and 2 when we started dating. I was only 19, she worried/feared/ran, but I chased her

8 years later, while their father is "present", her and I are raising Daphnee and Nathan together, and she's pretty good at it To them, its just more mommy and they love relying on two women on love them. Theyre also lucky enough to have dad around.

However, I cannot imagine dating someone who has a "king of the castle" child. Obnoxious, impolite, disrespectful, bossy, angered, children but more importantly, their parents irritate me. Ure 5 yr old kid is kicking my muzzled dog as he spits at little girls and tells old ladies to fuck off. See the dog can be a brat, so I restrain him... How bout u restrain u CHILD a tad for fawks sake?

We as adults have to obey rules and guidelines, sometimes challenging our wants, needs or ideas, we tend to enjoy some sort of structure while feeling the support and love of our families/peers/friends so why should it be any different for children? Anyways...

Clearly, having kids equals making sacrifies, for the parent and their significant other. Depends where ure at in ure life. what u want. what kind of parent and child relationship ure dealing with etc.

 

[The Monkey Man]

I think that people who have children could be viewed as having baggage...

In all actuality, have less baggage because they are more loving, supportive, and used to compromise and sacrifice...



(((Thread ender?)))