well, in that case, you should've taken the cell phone out his fat fucking sweaty-ass hand and beat the ever loving shit out of the fat fucking penguin.
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Gym Idiot Sightings 2007
- Thread starter ponyboy
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I have mentioned this guy that doesn't actually do any sets - he chats, he reads his newspaper, he walks around and now he seems to be a regular. I've named him Mr. No Workout. What I've discovered is there are actually two or three of these guys and they all do the same thing. They will find an area with a cute girl or someone they know, strike up a conversation while sitting on a piece of equipment (not using it, just sitting on it) and do nothing. Then when the other person gets done and leaves, they walk off and find another spot. It's actually pretty funny.
We also have another guy all of us trainers call Mongo. He's one of those big guys but insists on wearing a wife beater even though he has body hair that looks like an afro all over him. All my female clients wonder why he doesn't realize how gross it looks - and he's hit on most of them by trying to tell them what to do or giving them suggestions. He also tries to make friends with everyone in the gym. His workout consists of several high speed sets of arms followed by two minutes of heavy bag work followed by more arms, repeat.
We also have another guy all of us trainers call Mongo. He's one of those big guys but insists on wearing a wife beater even though he has body hair that looks like an afro all over him. All my female clients wonder why he doesn't realize how gross it looks - and he's hit on most of them by trying to tell them what to do or giving them suggestions. He also tries to make friends with everyone in the gym. His workout consists of several high speed sets of arms followed by two minutes of heavy bag work followed by more arms, repeat.
The cell phone in the gym thing is really one of my biggest pet peeves. I mean come on, no one is that important that they cant be without their phone for an hour. And nothing pisses me off more than the person who just sits there with the phone to their head not even talking! Either there is no one on the other end and he is just trying to look cool, or the person they are talking to is extremely long winded. At any rate, hang up, lift, or get back in your stupid SUV and drive around and talk. Jerkoffs!
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we got a few of the older guys who have to walk around bullshitting with everyone. I cant stand people so I wear an ipod. If they are near me, they start looking at me, so I blare the music up to a point where it almost annoying. On top of me being 3/4 deaf, they still insist on talking to me. That's where I usually envision hitting them with my WOC-thew 45 lb plate.
Anyone here have a person in the gym that you try to stay away from because once they start talking to you, there's no turning them off?
If a call comes I have to take it. That's set in stone ... not my rules. But I can say "I can't talk right now call ya back in a few" and then hang up, walk out of the weight room to a hallway, then return the call.
Some Banger punks made a scene last week. Some skinny stick boys were killing time acting like they knew how to work out and noticed a kid their own age ... I like this kid. I'd put him at about 19 but he is always there working out and doing very well. They started to talk to each other about him ... not to him but about him close enough for him to hear. The normal "steroid freak" kinda comments followed by "he must be making up for a small dick".
This kid looked around ... saw no ladies in the gym ... faced the little punks and pulled out 8" of flacid dangling pecker and stated he had $500 wager that said he had a bigger dick than any of "you assholes". They all shut up. He then went on to do his 320# bech-sets. The little punks still giggled at each other ... but they did it very quietly and very soon after they left.
kidbodybilder
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lol he showed them
LMAO
silverback
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Well, I haven't worked out drunk, but I have tried to workout when I've had the WORST hangover!
I'd said I'd go to the gym so I had to really, all my mates said that I STANK of alcohol. I laid down to do some dumbell presses and thought my head was gonna explode! My face went red and I could feel my pluse in my head. So I thought I'd forget training for the day and went and got a sauna instead. Bad idea! after about five minutes in there everything went red and black and I found it hard to stand up, I ended up sitting under a cold shower for about 10 mins just so I could get changed and go back to bed.
Do I win anything, like a gym idiot mug or trophy?
That's possibly the gayest thing you can do in a gym.
I dunno, i think using the smith machine is a close second.
Nooo, I think pulling out your johnson in front of a bunch of males still quantifies itself on its own standing.
It's gay to ogle and talk shit about another guy's willy, not to whip it out and make the fuckers feel inferior.
that rocky one is about the funniest ive read...
ill admit sometimes i run with my hands up; because im trying to get used to keepin my hands up for for a fight...
EDIT: BUT I NEVER THROW PUNCHES AT THE AIR ON THE TREADMILL
ill admit sometimes i run with my hands up; because im trying to get used to keepin my hands up for for a fight...
EDIT: BUT I NEVER THROW PUNCHES AT THE AIR ON THE TREADMILL
Today, i guy i've never seen pulled a chair up to the dumbell rack, angled it, and began using the dumbell rack as a footrest whilst he did his bicep curls on an inclining seat. Not only did he make it impossible to access the 40 pound, 50 pound and 60 / 70 pound dumbells but he wasn't actually using any of the particular dumbells on THAT rack. No idea what he was thinking.
I'm trying to envision that. All I see is a fucking idiot needing to be whacked with a 45 lb plate.
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That's the other group of idiots I see at the cables. A few guys will actually drag the preacher bench over to the cable stack, do curls with a cable over the preacher bench and then just leave it there. And it's two rooms over.
And not that anyone here probably does spinning, but I teach it. This fat woman came into my class today 20 minutes late, sat on a bike, did a few slow revolutions, sat there for about 10 minutes, tried again (she had her tension way too high for a fat out of shape blob) and then got off the bike, stood there staring for five minutes - it almost creeped me out - and then left. Freaking weirdos.
And not that anyone here probably does spinning, but I teach it. This fat woman came into my class today 20 minutes late, sat on a bike, did a few slow revolutions, sat there for about 10 minutes, tried again (she had her tension way too high for a fat out of shape blob) and then got off the bike, stood there staring for five minutes - it almost creeped me out - and then left. Freaking weirdos.
katt
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I know at our gym, if your not at the spinning class 5 minutes before hand - you're not even let into the class....
wow katt, that sounds pretty shitty, but then again, if your late you shouldnt be there anyway... *(but do you really need a class to make your ride a bike fast)*
I got one today a 300+ lb chick was on the eliptical next to me and shes going slow; really slow, for like 5 minutes then gets off and walks away.
I got one today a 300+ lb chick was on the eliptical next to me and shes going slow; really slow, for like 5 minutes then gets off and walks away.
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Everyone has to start somewhere. 
katt
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Everyone has to start somewhere.
I was just thinking that - all this talk about the heavier gals - At least they are making some effort !
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And there's a big difference between doing 10 minutes on the elliptical and doing leg presses on the pec machine.
katt
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I fail to see the humor in that. And yes I need that lifing belt for seated calf raises.
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Just make sure to wear your gloves too!
I HATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATEHATE people who don't put their shit back. It's so out of control at my gym. There is NO reason for me to have to pull 300lbs of plates of a bar. NO reason. I should have to pull off ZERO pounds of weights when I'm done.
Fucking unreal.
I swear, stabbing should be legal in gyms. I would be the stabber. Who needs lifting when an entire workout could be had from stabbing ignorant fucks?
...in case anyone missed it...
STAB
STAB
ok while i agree with you; I feel like leaving 45 lb plates (one on each side) is appropriate.
more than that is being a jerk; 135 is kinda the gold standard warm up for most people in my gym it seems like (or the max for some, but they could always use a lil extra workout even if they arent gettin it consciously)
agree?
Cant stand when you see those people, fully dressed to the nines: Balloon print pants, baggy sweatshirt with t shirt underneath (even in 96 degree weather), black/red otomix, shiny weight belt (with some stupid fucking saying imprinted) and of course, the gloves with the wrist wraps on them.
