Quick question

[Arnold]

Originally posted by Muscle_Girl
Anyone wanna tell me their opinion of abortion.. (I am NOT looking for people yelling at me, just getting an idea for what may or may not happen)

It's an option that should be exercised more often!

If someone is not ready for a child they should get an abortion...it's not fair to bring a child into this world that either you do not want or cannot provide for.

I know there is adoption, and that should be used as a last resort. I think you just create a lifetime of psychological problems for a kid when you put them up for adoption. Sooner or later they will find out and want to find their biological parents, and then everyone is hurt.

just my opinion...

 

[I Are Baboon]

Originally posted by Prince


It's an option that should be exercised more often!

If someone is not ready for a child they should get an abortion...it's not fair to bring a child into this world that either you do not want or cannot provide for.

I know there is adoption, and that should be used as a last resort. I think you just create a lifetime of psychological problems for a kid when you put them up for adoption. Sooner or later they will find out and want to find their biological parents, and then everyone is hurt.

just my opinion...

I agree.

 

[nikegurl]

Hi MG - I know you think people are being harsh and you said you made a mistake....but it doesn't really sound like a mistake. It sounds like a deliberate (bad) decision and part of a pattern.

Simply put - "squeezing it out" is no better than nothing at all.

And if the usual method is for him to pull out - that isn't any better either.

And don't forget - STDs are also an issue - not just pregnancy.

 

[MtnBikerChk]

Originally posted by Prince


It's an option that should be exercised more often!

If someone is not ready for a child they should get an abortion...it's not fair to bring a child into this world that either you do not want or cannot provide for.

I know there is adoption, and that should be used as a last resort. I think you just create a lifetime of psychological problems for a kid when you put them up for adoption. Sooner or later they will find out and want to find their biological parents, and then everyone is hurt.

just my opinion...

Here's a can of worms.

Here's a can opener.

too late.

 

[naturaltan]

Originally posted by Prince

If someone is not ready for a child they should ...

not have sex!! If you're not prepared for the consequences, don't play the game. If should be that simple, but of course, life is not simple.

 

[irontime]

Oh sweetie no. I'm not going to tell you to stop having sex as I don't think there are to many people on this board or in society as a whole that actually practice this, but if no protection then at LEAST pull out. Like it's been said before it's not fool proof but it's better than going in you. But since that is to late then take mega doses of Vitamin C. I've heard that this helps stimulate the body into having your period. This is not intended to be used as a birth control as it may not work, but it's worth a shot.

 

[Twin Peak]

Okay MG. You feel unsupported and you feel some of use have been harse. Maybe, but you need to understand why.

It is the naivite' (some would call stupidity) not just getting into this situation, but also how you started the thread asking if squeezing it out works.

If you had started this thread by saying "Last night I did the stupidest thing...."

I am sure you would have received more support.

 

[nikegurl]

irontime...PLEASE don't suggest they "pull out"

that doesn't work! i can't believe that myth still circulates.
granted - less sperm have a shot at making it if you pull out but it definitely does not qualify as an even remotely reliable form of birth control.

 

[irontime]

I'm not suggesting 'pull out' just saying that it would have been a hell of a lot better than going in her. I'm suggesting condoms, abstenance, swallowing, hell ANYTHING rather than going in her.

 

[Muscle_Girl]

Well, thanks for the positive responses. It's what I needed most.

I guess I should have worded it different from the start, but I tend to do that alot.. as the same in the "Lol" thread. The way I type it is just whatever comes to my mind.


In response to you Prince, thanks for the input.. I had and prolly will NEVER have intentions of giving my child up for adoption no matter the situation. I have grown up without a father so I know exactly how it feels from the kids perspective.
I was also told that abortions ruin your insides, and make it so that some people can't even have kids afterwards... This just a myth, or does it actually happen?

We have been talking about me getting birth control pills for a little while now, I just haven't acted on it. I will do that this week when I see the doctor.

As for abstenance.. Not happening. Our lives aren't based solely on sex, but our relationship is fairly intimate.. we share alot of things with eachother, and its not always sex that we resort to for intimacy. This is not some hardcore teenage porno... this is our lives intwined, and I think highly of it. We have been together for over a year now, and my feelings for him are extremely strong. And I know he feels the same because I see it alot within him. It's not like the first date we said I love you and thats how its been since.. Its taken quite a long time to get where we are so far.. we also have much more to come, but I know that will come when the time is right.

 

[Pianomahnn]

Find out if your preggers, now, and get an abortion as soon as possible.

I despise abortions more than a month into conception...I find it's evil.

 

[Rissole]

I am sorry to say that i am totally disgusted with most of the responses from you guys. Sorry but that is the first thing that comes to mind....
Anyway let me say i agree with naturaltan The only way to be sure is 100% abstinance Even condoms have a failure rate of 1 in 9. And i have a friends who got pregnant while using the pill (they are married) I know that might be hard for you NG but if your not prepared to have a child then dont do the deed.
Does your boyfreind love you?? Yes probably but enough....
You said you asked him if he would stay with you if you were sterile and his answer..... Darling you are sharing the most precious part of your life with this guy, i love my wife so much more than my children it wouldn't matter if she was sterile, i love her not the family 'thing' (mind you i love my children so much it hurts) When you marry someone its FOR BETTER OR WORSE!!
Abortion.............. please..........
Do not be fooled young lady, as soon as sperm meets egg you have created life, a new life.... To "get rid of" or put so crudely by Mr Baboon "rubbed one out" is .................... you fill in the blank
Not to mention the emotional scar it will leave in your mind for the rest of your life (people that say that a certain time frame that the fetoeus is not a person are coping out)
Sorry if any of that hurt MG but like someone said "take a step back" take a good look.
Dont wait to see the doctor do it now!!!!! You've made the mistake deal with it now!!!

Yes my respect level for w8 and mma also went up more than a few steps!!!
I now go tentively to click the "submit reply" button...

 

[butterfly]

I don't know how to start this post... I feel really bad cause I know I've been hard on you as a teen having sex. Mostly it was b/c I got pregnant when I was 17 and hated seeing you be so naive and walk right into the same mistakes I made.

If you are pregnant, please don't think your life is over. It will be hard to be so young and raise a child but w8 & mmafiter did it and I did too. Believe me, it was much harder being a pregnant teen 15 yrs ago than it is now. Everyone still looked down on you like you were scum. Now days they got daycares in High School!!!

I do so hope you'll reconsider the abortion. I really can't think of a more selfish act then conveniently getting rid of a baby so you can have a "normal" life... whatever that's supposed to be.

I recently got pregnant, twice actually, with fade using the pull out method... miscarried both times in the 6-7 week time frame. I would give anything to have those babies. Noone will ever convince me they were just a bunch of cells.

I know how you feel about the adoption thing, too. I couldn't stand the thought of knowing I had a child in this world and didn't know if he was ok. I knew another girl that gave away her baby girl and she regrets it to this day.

Bottom line girl... I'm here if you need someone to talk to, regardless of how all this turns out.

 

[butterfly]

For future reference...

Menstruation occurs every 28 days or so between puberty and menopause, except during pregnancy, and the flow lasts about 5 days, the times varying from woman to woman.

Menstruation usually starts between the ages of 11 and 14 and continues into the forties or fifties. At first the periods may be irregular, but once they are established they usually occur in a fairly definite rhythm, at intervals of 21 to 35 days. In these regular cycles, there may be monthly variations of a few days, which are considered normal. Cycle length may be influenced by changes in climate or living conditions, or by emotional factors.

General ill health, a change in climate or living conditions, emotional shock, or, frequently, either the hope or fear of becoming pregnant can sometimes stop menstruation after it has begun (secondary amenorrhea).

That means that sometimes the fear that you might be pregnant can actually cause you to not start your period.


A woman is usually able to get pregnant for about 5 days each month, when ovulation occurs. On average, ovulation occurs 12 to 16 days before the menstrual period begins. Therefore, ovulation would occur on about day 10 of a 24-day menstrual cycle, day 14 of a 28-day cycle, or day 21 of a 35-day cycle. The key to becoming pregnant or to avoiding pregnancy is determining when ovulation occurs.

courtesy of webmd.com

-------------------------------------
Simplest way to determine when you are ovulating is to keep a calendar with every day (no matter how slight) of every period marked. Then you can determine your cycle and when you ovulate based on the guidelines above... don't have sex when you are or are about to start ovulating.

Read this to learn more about when you can get pregnant.

Hope it's a false alarm and that this info will help you understand your body better.

 

[animal56]

Originally posted by Muscle_Girl
I am scared shitless here and what you guys say is not supportive.. and what I need is support right now.

Anyone wanna tell me their opinion of abortion.. (I am NOT looking for people yelling at me, just getting an idea for what may or may not happen)

AND please, please stop jumping down my throat about this.. I have done it enough towards myself.

MG,

I don't think everyone is trying to be nasty about this, they are just trying help you. (Again, alittle misguided, late, AND harsh. But, what's done is done.)

My opinion on abortion:

A fetus is not a baby until it develops a functioning brain. I don't have any resources on hand at the moment, but I'm pretty sure that it isn't in the first trimester (3 months), which is the end line to have an abortion.

A woman's body is her own, and if she makes this choice, then it is her right. I would also hope that she would consider the father's opinion on the situation, as he helped in the conception.

HOWEVER, I feel that abortion should not be used as a form of birth control. Women who are raped, molested, in financial, health and/or mental situations, are too young and/or single, should not be deterred from having an abortion if it is her educated choice. I also feel that everyone has the right to make a mistake. Once bitten, twice shy.

Whatever choice you make MG, it's the right choice, just make sure it's an educated choice, and be sure to use this as a learning experience.

Hope this helps. Feel free to PM if you have any other questions. I will try to help as best as I can.

 

[Arnold]

Originally posted by Muscle_Girl
I was also told that abortions ruin your insides, and make it so that some people can't even have kids afterwards... This just a myth, or does it actually happen?

If done properly it should not cause any problems, but just like any "surgery" there can be complications, so I guess there is some risk involved, but I would say minimal.

 

[Rissole]

Originally posted by butterfly
I don't know how to start this post... I feel really bad cause I know I've been hard on you as a teen having sex. Mostly it was b/c I got pregnant when I was 17 and hated seeing you be so naive and walk right into the same mistakes I made.

If you are pregnant, please don't think your life is over. It will be hard to be so young and raise a child but w8 & mmafiter did it and I did too. Believe me, it was much harder being a pregnant teen 15 yrs ago than it is now. Everyone still looked down on you like you were scum. Now days they got daycares in High School!!!

I do so hope you'll reconsider the abortion. I really can't think of a more selfish act then conveniently getting rid of a baby so you can have a "normal" life... whatever that's supposed to be.

I recently got pregnant, twice actually, with fade using the pull out method... miscarried both times in the 6-7 week time frame. I would give anything to have those babies. Noone will ever convince me they were just a bunch of cells.

I know how you feel about the adoption thing, too. I couldn't stand the thought of knowing I had a child in this world and didn't know if he was ok. I knew another girl that gave away her baby girl and she regrets it to this day.

Bottom line girl... I'm here if you need someone to talk to, regardless of how all this turns out.

Awesome words Butterfly!!

 

[Rissole]

Originally posted by animal56
My opinion on abortion:

A fetus is not a baby until it develops a functioning brain. I don't have any resources on hand at the moment, but I'm pretty sure that it isn't in the first trimester (3 months), which is the end line to have an abortion.

So at what point when you were concieved where you really not you??

Originally posted by animal56

HOWEVER, I feel that abortion should not be used as a form of birth control. Women who are raped, molested, in financial, health and/or mental situations, are too young and/or single, should not be deterred from having an abortion if it is her educated choice. I also feel that everyone has the right to make a mistake. Once bitten, twice shy.

I have a friend who is a product of rape. He is one of the nicest most level headed people i know, Also we are not living in a third world country ...... so where are you drawing the line, would that just be whatever is convenient for the person, like Butterfly said"selfish"

 

[Mudge]

Even pre-ejaculatory fluid is enough to impregnate a woman (dont know if this was covered, didn't read the rest!).

 

[Muscle_Girl]

Of course the subject of abortion has come up when talking with my guy MANY times.

Basically his response everytime would be "it's up to the female, this is something that is a life altering action. She is the one that has to carry it around for 9 months, and care for it most of her life." He has also told me that his choice wouldn't be to get an abortion, but still is the females choice.

At first I didn't really think it should be all my choice, but as he explined the reasons it convinced me that it really is MY choice. Not that what he thinks wont be taken into consideration, and we wont talk about it.. but really a matter of whether we can support this child if we choose to go through a pregnancy.

I know that he would be there for me, as he has been there for me so much to deal with this exact topic.

I just pray that I got enough out so that I wont even have to deal with this all at my age.

Once again, thanks for the supporting comments, and Butterfly, I thank you for the information, its extremely helpful.

 

[naturaltan]

I had a long drawn out response, but I have decided that you MG know 'your man' better than we do. It makes me wonder if he truly would be by yourside with such comments as "it's up to the woman ..." Please, be sure that he is sincere in his love to you. I wish you the best in your relationship and in whatever comes in the next little while.

 

[ALBOB]

First: No, squeezing out ejaculate will NOT prevent pregnancy. It will not even decrease your chances of getting pregnant. By the time you start squeezing it's too late. Enough on that subject, hopefully you've learned you HAVE to use birth control.

Second: I don't know anyone who has been adopted or has given a child up for adoption so I'm not speaking from experience here, just going on gutt feelings. There are thousands of couples yearning for a child but for whatever reason can't have one of their own. There are also thousands of children that are suffering because they were brought into homes that don't have the ability to provide for them. Seems to me that putting the two together would be a good thing. Again, that's not from experience, just a feeling.

Third and last: As Prince already said, an abortion is surgery. As with any surgery, things can go wrong. I have no idea what the numbers are but if you go to an established, reputable doctor your chances of being damaged by having an abortion are very remote. I'm not going to tell you my feelings about abortion because it's not my place to try to insinuate my feelings onto your body BUT, I am concerned by your boyfriends attitude.

Originally posted by Muscle_Girl Basically his response everytime would be "it's up to the female, this is something that is a life altering action. She is the one that has to carry it around for 9 months, and care for it most of her life." He has also told me that his choice wouldn't be to get an abortion, but still is the females choice.

Notice that when he said "it's a life altering action" he meant only for the female. His life is going to go on as though nothing had happened. He also stated that he expects you to take care of it and leave him scott free. He's even removed himself from the decision making process. I don't buy for an instant it's because "it's the female's choice", he just doesn't want to have the responsibility. OK, enough of my rant. You say you know him well and that you're absolutely sure he'd be by your side no matter what. I hope you're right. Honestly, I want nothing but the best for you so I really do hope he'll be there for you. Unfortunately, that's not what his words are saying.

 

[butterfly]

Originally posted by animal56
My opinion on abortion:

A fetus is not a baby until it develops a functioning brain. I don't have any resources on hand at the moment, but I'm pretty sure that it isn't in the first trimester (3 months), which is the end line to have an abortion.

Did you know that a fetus can have a heartbeat as early as 5-6 weeks? That's makes it some sort of living creature beyond a mass of cells.

Originally posted by animal56
A woman's body is her own, and if she makes this choice, then it is her right. I would also hope that she would consider the father's opinion on the situation, as he helped in the conception.

HOWEVER, I feel that abortion should not be used as a form of birth control. Women who are raped, molested, in financial, health and/or mental situations, are too young and/or single, should not be deterred from having an abortion if it is her educated choice. I also feel that everyone has the right to make a mistake. Once bitten, twice shy.

Whatever choice you make MG, it's the right choice, just make sure it's an educated choice, and be sure to use this as a learning experience.

I completely agree with everything you've said here.

I'm glad I had the choice. In fact my parents gave me a lot of options on each choice. I don't know if I could have lived with the outcome had it not be MY choice, my resolution, and my acceptance of the responsibility that came with the choice.

 

[Trap-isaurus]

Wow people not alot of very nice responses here, I think what dissapoints me the most is the amount of threads I have heard men refer to not using any protection and it is taken very lightly by everyone. I hope all those with extremely negative reactions remeber this the next time a guy posts something about going rubberless!!

Swearing about this and deamening MG after the fact gets no one anywhere, except making her feel even worse.

MG a shitty situation to say the least but what is done is done, I would recomend the "Morning after" pill, it will make you sick and cause you to have your period right away but if you don't think you can do this then thats your best solution at present.

And for all those slamming MG's boyfriend lets not jump to conclusions here people. I would say the same thing if it was my G/F, do I want her to get an abortion and then go thru the rest of her life feeling like I pressured her into it....hell no!! It is her decision, he made the decision as well as her to take the chance, if she decides to keep the child then he takes care of it, if she decides to abort the child then it's her decision, it's her body.

"It's a life altering decision" is not a statement of uncaring about the situation but a pretty fucking grown up attitude, I know women who've had abortions and it's a very life altering decision in that 8 times outta 10 they are pretty messed up about it forever.

As far as Im concerned Abortion should only be for Victims of Rape/Molestation/Incest, if they choose to. To many women use this as a form of birth control.

 

[animal56]

Originally posted by peetrips


So at what point when you were concieved where you really not you??

To be perfectly honest, I am only who I am now due to my upbringing and my lifestyle. "I" believe that until a fetus can think and react, that it is only living tissue. Let me ask you something...what is your first childhood memory?

Originally posted by peetrips

I have a friend who is a product of rape. He is one of the nicest most level headed people i know, Also we are not living in a third world country ...... so where are you drawing the line, would that just be whatever is convenient for the person, like Butterfly said"selfish"

Did I say that a "rape child" is an evil homicidal maniac? No. Take into consideration, that if A mother does not want a constant reminder of an extremely life altering and traumatic event, then I'm sure as hell that the child is bound for a life of torment and/or unlove. How fair tothe child is that? As well, if the mother has been raped, chances are, she is not prepared for a child. Is it fair to raise a child in a bad situation? Do you not think there are enough orphans in the world? Like Bob Barker says, "Help control the pet population..."

I hardly feel that someone is doing a selfish act, if indeed the child is born to grow and live under dire straits. More like a considerate act.

 

[animal56]

Originally posted by butterfly

Did you know that a fetus can have a heartbeat as early as 5-6 weeks? That's makes it some sort of living creature beyond a mass of cells.

I'm sure I'm just going to start more debate, but I thought I would respond with a question, please don't be offended butterfly.

Is it cruel to keep a person with a heartbeat alive, even though they are practically brain dead? If they even recover, they will more than likely be doomed to a life as an unthinking gelatinous vegetable. Is that okay?

And not to sound like PETA, but cows have heartbeats. Is it some sort of living creature, or just a big bag of meat for the bodybuilders in this forum?

 

[irontime]

Originally posted by animal56

And not to sound like PETA, but cows have heartbeats. Is it some sort of living creature, or just a big bag of meat for the bodybuilders in this forum?

mmmmmmmmm, burger

 

[Muscle_Girl]

BjUaFyF:

Thank you so much for your support, you are one of the few that actually understand how it is for me at the moment. Your thoughts really were heart-felt, and I luv ya for saying it all.

As for an update.. I have a doctors appointment on Tuesday. We will see what happens with all that.

I was in to see the guidence counsellor today and we talked about alot of important things. She has 3 people coming in for me to speak with me about the choices I will have...Getting a job to support this baby...And becoming an independent mother (not saying that Brian wont be there for me, but I can't rely on him for everything.)

As for my choices, I think that I will actually go through the pregnancy if it turns out that I am pregnant. I am able to care for it more than I had thought, and I have alot of support from the people around me.

I will be sure to update you all about the doctors appointment and further on down the road. Thanks for all the support you all have contributed.. whether it was harsh love or soft caring I appreciate everything you ALL have said.

 

[butterfly]

animal56 -

I don't want to debate the abortion issue with you. You will NEVER convince me that human life does not begin at conception.

Can't we just respect each others rights to believe what we want?

 

[animal56]

Originally posted by butterfly
animal56 -

I don't want to debate the abortion issue with you. You will NEVER convince me that human life does not begin at conception.

Can't we just respect each others rights to believe what we want?

Okay. Let's leave it at that.