yeh i know..i just don't understand what's wrong with me
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Scared Shitless
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Hybah
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oaktownboy said:
No, through drug dealing and sleeping with hookers. Otb now really .. what's your IQ ??
P-funk : Those advices are very cool but really until you start feeling better you'll always think about it. You stop it for half day but then you think about it so intense that it gives you fatique and brain fog.
i was walking around the block, until my ankles started swelling..and the sun make me feel tired and sick...wish i knew why
Hybah said:
u should know better than anyone the brain fog i/we experience is so damaging i forget the simplest things and need to be told over and over again
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Yeah ok sorry for being a prick but man it gets really frustrating. If you can't remember what i or trouble have been speaking about the whole time then go back few pages and read it. I hope you won't forget this advice.
And yeah remembering stuff.. it's crazy that it even fucks up memmory.. i had quite big problems thanks to it ... oh man i know.. life's hard...
And yeah remembering stuff.. it's crazy that it even fucks up memmory.. i had quite big problems thanks to it ... oh man i know.. life's hard...
well i went to a psychiatrist yesterday. She agreed with me, saying there was something physically wrong with me. She kept stressing over and over again that I need to have goals. I said my goal is to find out what's wrong with me and get better. She said that wasn't good enhough; I need to start thinking about my future...right...
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We're all very different. I had so much future plans before the ilness got me. I started body building, building my own business, dating my girlfriend, playing drums, univeristy life and etc etc. All my dreams and life goals started to fade away. But i knew i'm not a type of a looser that would give up so i spent hunderds of hours reading all kinds of info i could get that would lead me to better understanding of my probs.
Afterall it's good ... i took the best lesson ever about the health itself.... without this ilness i would never know how badly i lived ... it was like a cold shower .. and just imagine that there's millions and millions of other people doing the same fault like we.. it's just a matter of time till they get sick somehow too.. shame shame... but everybody on this planet cannot be healthy... that would be a disaster. Teaching people about it has no effect. You will start listening only after you hit the very bottom of health misery.
Afterall it's good ... i took the best lesson ever about the health itself.... without this ilness i would never know how badly i lived ... it was like a cold shower .. and just imagine that there's millions and millions of other people doing the same fault like we.. it's just a matter of time till they get sick somehow too.. shame shame... but everybody on this planet cannot be healthy... that would be a disaster. Teaching people about it has no effect. You will start listening only after you hit the very bottom of health misery.
the bottom line is there is no cure or treatment for CFS..all they can do is proscibe meds for certain ailments, i.e. sleep disorders, pain,etc. I can't even do the deep breathing techniques without falling asleep.
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Yo man...this is a touch situation here. Keep your head up man. Something like this happend to my cousin. Well he got hit with MS. He lost all his drive and well now he pretty much stays in his bed all day and watches t.v or sleeps. Went from a GREAT basketball player to being in bed all day cause of MS. Do not let this happen to you! Keep your heard up as I stated and try as best as you can to keep your old routines.
damn sorry to hear that..how was he diagnosed?
started acupuncture again today. 10 minutes into the session I had a bowel movement (well, i had to wait until the session was over, 40 minutes later). Hopefully, this is a step in the right direction. He also thought my illness was caused by an infection that hit me when my immune system was down; a.k.a., when I was dieting.
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Your therapist was trying to get you to think about the future beyond your current health problems. You need to see yourself getting past this difficulty and getting on with your life. Self preoccupation and worry are at the heart of this problem, OTB. You need to begin to think positively about recovery, putting this bad part of your life behind you.
The reason that deep breathing exercises put you to sleep, is that it mimics the sleep of babies, they belly breath. You hold you breath reflexively. Low oxygen in the brain make stress damage much worse, it raises stress hormone levels and keeps them high.
When you sleep at night, try not to sleep curled up on your side with your chin tucked down on your chest - it blocks breathing. When you sit, sit with your chin raised, head up, for the same reason. You need to practice these breathing exercises to stop the holding of breath, its very bad for you, it makes your gut release more destructive acid.
For the same reason, when you go walking, you improve breathing, drop stress response, and reduce that acid flow. At the same time, you improve blood sugar control, and that i at the bottom of the fluid retention in your ankles.
Keep with this slow, steady progress, OTB, it will help you heal yourself.
The reason that deep breathing exercises put you to sleep, is that it mimics the sleep of babies, they belly breath. You hold you breath reflexively. Low oxygen in the brain make stress damage much worse, it raises stress hormone levels and keeps them high.
When you sleep at night, try not to sleep curled up on your side with your chin tucked down on your chest - it blocks breathing. When you sit, sit with your chin raised, head up, for the same reason. You need to practice these breathing exercises to stop the holding of breath, its very bad for you, it makes your gut release more destructive acid.
For the same reason, when you go walking, you improve breathing, drop stress response, and reduce that acid flow. At the same time, you improve blood sugar control, and that i at the bottom of the fluid retention in your ankles.
Keep with this slow, steady progress, OTB, it will help you heal yourself.
When you say I hold my breath reflexively, do u mean it has become a habit, like something I do subconciously?..,Is it possible I have asthma or something obstructing my passageway?
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At the basis of each and every action in the body, there is a point of regulation, usually at the gene level. Yes, there is a gene turned on when you are heavily stressed that makes you breath shallowly, like you are restricting your breathing. Its a very ancient control, one used by prey to avoid catching the attention of predators. Its under automatic (autonomic) control, as is breathing itself.
In order to correct the viscious cycle between reflexive breath holding and stress hormone being continuously released, you do breathing exercises. That breaks the nerve action in the solar plexus, and causes it to move again, that shuts off the stress hormone reinforcement in the brain.
Like taking a big breath, or releasing a sigh, when a stressful period ends. You've seen in dozens, maybe hundreds of times on TV, now you know why. You're telling the brain, stress time is over.
You have nothing obstructing your airway during the day - unless you drop your head while sitting, so that your chin in down towards your chest. Try it. See how it shuts off some of the air flow. Always keep your head elevated, and when you sleep at night, try not to curl up into a ball - again, thats reflexive when you have persistant chronic stress.
If you had asthma, you'd know it. I don't think you do. Sleep apnea, maybe.
Breathing holding. A sure thing.
In order to correct the viscious cycle between reflexive breath holding and stress hormone being continuously released, you do breathing exercises. That breaks the nerve action in the solar plexus, and causes it to move again, that shuts off the stress hormone reinforcement in the brain.
Like taking a big breath, or releasing a sigh, when a stressful period ends. You've seen in dozens, maybe hundreds of times on TV, now you know why. You're telling the brain, stress time is over.
You have nothing obstructing your airway during the day - unless you drop your head while sitting, so that your chin in down towards your chest. Try it. See how it shuts off some of the air flow. Always keep your head elevated, and when you sleep at night, try not to curl up into a ball - again, thats reflexive when you have persistant chronic stress.
If you had asthma, you'd know it. I don't think you do. Sleep apnea, maybe.
Breathing holding. A sure thing.
people with CFS usually hsve problems breathing..getting SPECTRAcell test to see if i have any mineral/vitamin deficiencies...CFS is usually caused by one
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I had CFS sometimes just because i got angry, when i was too excited, when i got scared and etc etc. I was quite mental in the first stages of the ilness. But I could actually make it better just by relaxing 
Sometimes it laste quite long .. i hate the feeling of being totaly like numb .. total brain fog and slow body.. yuck..
Sometimes it laste quite long .. i hate the feeling of being totaly like numb .. total brain fog and slow body.. yuck..
gotta wait 1 week for doc to order test..and will prolly have to wait another week to get the results back...fuckin great
got a nice Smith and Wessun...
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Whatcha want, boy, attention?
I got me a nice little custom Ruger .38. Now what is your point?
Everything you need to know to get better has already done been laid out here, real pretty for you. Yet, you continue to labor under this grand self delusion that somehow you are not the cause, that the next lab test or pill is gonna bail your ass out of this fix you're in. There is no sports medicine doc in his right mind is gonna lay the blame at the feet of some pharmaceutical, when you abused a diet drug and got your neuroendocrine system in hot water.
*shaking head*
Go back and read the last several pages, refresh that short term memory of yours and start to fix yourself.
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Trouble said:
Whatcha want, boy, attention?
I got me a nice little custom Ruger .38. Now what is your point?
Everything you need to know to get better has aleady done been laid out here, real pretty for you. Yet, you continue to labor under this grand self delusion that somehow you are not the cause, that the next lab test or pill is gonna bail your ass out of this fix you're in. There is no sports medicine doc in his right mind is gonna lay the blame at the feet of some pharmaceutical, when you abused a diet drug and got your neuroendocrine system in hot water.
*shaking head*
Go back and read the last several pages, refresh that short term memory of yours and start to fix yourself.
no, just giving an explanation for why i probably won't be posting anymore
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oaktownboy said:
I really knew that you just have to be tied up and locked into a safe room for a year while receiving some serious health and mental coaching.
It's not the host (body) that should die but the part of your personality which got into your current state. It's the part of your personality that's having some control now. Kill THAT but not the host! The host is still young and has his whole life before him.
If there's atleast something sane in you i hope it won't give up the fight.
OTB, do you want to get better, or do you want someone to feel sorry for you???
at this point, i don't think i want to get better..i'm in too much pain. i already told my parents where i want my ashes spread.
oaktownboy said:
I never believe that. I for one am a strong person. I believe, and I think I or anyone else can chage if they want to. Your mind is a very powerful thing. It's capable of great things. You can overcome much more than what you think you can. Now get your mind set right and do something.
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OTB you lost control over yourself. Tell someone to tie you up. Really .. you're just in a depression that's all. You got fucked up chemicals in your brain and you lost your lust to live. Really tell someone to tie you up. After the chemical balance will be restored you will once again feel the the normal "i want to live" feeling which drives us every day. Even when depressed you still have some logic thinking and you know it will be better and somewhere deep down in you you feel you WANT TO LIVE. You know it's in you but it's somehow supressed .. it's just because of the ilness.. if it will go away you will feel great again .. you know it's in you .. fight for it.
This is very very interesting but today i woke up with a depression. This is very very unussual for me. It's maybe a second real depression in my whole life. I feel so weird and i'm also loosing my lust to live and it's been always very very very very strong. Funny... life's weird
This is very very interesting but today i woke up with a depression. This is very very unussual for me. It's maybe a second real depression in my whole life. I feel so weird and i'm also loosing my lust to live and it's been always very very very very strong. Funny... life's weird
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I have to say this again but this is really funny that i've got a real depression. I could slit my wrists in a moment ... but i KNOW it's gonna be away soon... and that's what protects my life.
OTB try to find this feeling in you that it will get better .. deep down in you you'll feel very guilty for doing something stupid like suicide. If you have problems looking for that feeling tell someone to tie you up... really...
OTB try to find this feeling in you that it will get better .. deep down in you you'll feel very guilty for doing something stupid like suicide. If you have problems looking for that feeling tell someone to tie you up... really...
went to infectious diseases doctor. She said I probably got a virus or something else that caused me to crash. testing me for many viruses, EBV, etc...but I don't really care because with my luck they will probably come back negative..This is the last, and I mean last, doctor I will ever see. I only went to this appointment because my mother begged me to go.
On a side note, I would like to thank all the people in this thread who have encouraged me over the past 2 years. I wish there were a way I could repay you. It's just too bad I couldn't recover.
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OTB look at me. I'm also 21 years old, started body-building, started going to college and of course have a quite broken health too. You see we are both very alike. Even our damn symptoms match up to 80%!!!!!!!!!! We both started looking for answers, started researching and etc etc.
So what's the damn difference between us that one actually got better and the other not? Luck? Inteligence? Money? Family background? Number of sexual partners?? ... who knows....
OTB please.. what evidence do you need to start doing the things like I or Trouble did??? We're both the same and you still refuse to follow to plan that helped me... you are NOT dying .. even if you have a virus you still have enough time left to help yourself .. if you had a deadly virus you would be dead by now .. again you maybe have a virus that just wrecked your balance but a large portion of this balance can still be restored and you won't feel shit anymore even with a virus in your body. And you know what the problem is??
!!!You'll never cure yourself from the mystery virus if you won't restore the balance!!!
!!!Only after some of the balance is restored you can fight your virus!!!!
The evidence that your doing hasn't brought you anywhere are those 2 wasted years of doing nothing but pushing yourself more and more over the edge. It's not the "virus" that's killing you .. it's yourself that's killing yourself..
I know it's hard .. i know you always have that feeling you just can't make it.. I had the same.. I was collapsing and collapsing all over again.. shaking in my bed wishing for the death to come .. but I tried and it worked. And volia i have much more energy and will to solve my "complications". God knows what bacterial or virus shit is in me but I have. It's a still damn mystery why i felt the taste of Whipped cream comming out of my stomach and all other weird symps...
So you see what is the problem?? You haven't even tried to follow the correct plan that Trouble or I was suggesting!!! How can you get better if you hadn't actually even tried to do the thing that should be done?? Can you get nice muscles if you won't train properly??
I don't beleive there isn't any energy left in you for finaly doing the correct regimen. You also have enough will power because you have no problems investing it in all that appointment shit.
You have it all and still don't do the correct thing. Crazy isn't it???
But if you still have problems with this .. write on a paper the list of all the things that were suggested and tell your parents to lock you up in the room and force you to do all the things on the list for atleast a year. They have to use force on you because you clearly are lacking self-respect. If they have doubts about it tell them about me and let them read what i have been saying here all the time. Give them the url .. they can contact me any time.
So what's the damn difference between us that one actually got better and the other not? Luck? Inteligence? Money? Family background? Number of sexual partners?? ... who knows....
OTB please.. what evidence do you need to start doing the things like I or Trouble did??? We're both the same and you still refuse to follow to plan that helped me... you are NOT dying .. even if you have a virus you still have enough time left to help yourself .. if you had a deadly virus you would be dead by now .. again you maybe have a virus that just wrecked your balance but a large portion of this balance can still be restored and you won't feel shit anymore even with a virus in your body. And you know what the problem is??
!!!You'll never cure yourself from the mystery virus if you won't restore the balance!!!
!!!Only after some of the balance is restored you can fight your virus!!!!
The evidence that your doing hasn't brought you anywhere are those 2 wasted years of doing nothing but pushing yourself more and more over the edge. It's not the "virus" that's killing you .. it's yourself that's killing yourself..
I know it's hard .. i know you always have that feeling you just can't make it.. I had the same.. I was collapsing and collapsing all over again.. shaking in my bed wishing for the death to come .. but I tried and it worked. And volia i have much more energy and will to solve my "complications". God knows what bacterial or virus shit is in me but I have. It's a still damn mystery why i felt the taste of Whipped cream comming out of my stomach and all other weird symps...
So you see what is the problem?? You haven't even tried to follow the correct plan that Trouble or I was suggesting!!! How can you get better if you hadn't actually even tried to do the thing that should be done?? Can you get nice muscles if you won't train properly??
I don't beleive there isn't any energy left in you for finaly doing the correct regimen. You also have enough will power because you have no problems investing it in all that appointment shit.
You have it all and still don't do the correct thing. Crazy isn't it???
But if you still have problems with this .. write on a paper the list of all the things that were suggested and tell your parents to lock you up in the room and force you to do all the things on the list for atleast a year. They have to use force on you because you clearly are lacking self-respect. If they have doubts about it tell them about me and let them read what i have been saying here all the time. Give them the url .. they can contact me any time.
