Universal Gym Rules - It's about Time

[Jeeper]

The gym is not a f'n highschool hangout while you are on summer vacation. Dont sit there with your friends hogging all the benches all day. You have legs also...work them

If you need to put a towel on your chest while doing bench so that it doesnt hurt when you drop it and bounce it of your chest..YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG!!( I actually saw this yesterday morning) It was in conjunction with his ass being a foot off the bench while lifting it up.

I also think that the guys that have never EVER done a full range of motion on any machine ever need to be punched in the head.

Dont go down 2 inches on a machine with a lot of weight and then strut around like you actually lifted it.

 

[Riverdragon]

Heck, since everyone else is venting I might as well vent too.

Don't put your water bottle or towel on any piece of equipment that you are not working on. Just because you are working next to it doesn't mean that the bench next to you is a fine place to put your shit. I don't know how many times I have had to walk up to guys twice my size and ask them to move their water or towel.

 

[OceanDude]

Ah, its good to see my old thread re-bumped and active once again!
-OD

 

[V Player]

Wear clothes that fit. A lot of people seem to think the gym is a good place to wear old clothes that fit you years ago.. before the gut..

I did not realize you saw me. Sorry.

 

[chadeau]

When your filling up your water bottle at the fountain. Let those of us that forget our bottle go ahead of you and just take a sip.

Today I had a man in front of me fill it up, look at me, continue filling it then when it was full 2 mins later he said "oh i'm sorry". No you weren't, you looked right at me 2 mins ago jackass.

 

[cops25]

The gym is not a f'n highschool hangout while you are on summer vacation. Dont sit there with your friends hogging all the benches all day. You have legs also...work them
If you need to put a towel on your chest while doing bench so that it doesnt hurt when you drop it and bounce it of your chest..YOU ARE DOING SOMETHING WRONG!!( I actually saw this yesterday morning) It was in conjunction with his ass being a foot off the bench while lifting it up.

That's my pet peeve. (September never comes soon enough )During the summer, my gym is filled with highschoolers...the same ones, everyday, all day. And I dont think I ever see them move from the bench. And nothing is worse than trying to concentrate while you have kids yelling to each other "comon dawg, push that motherf***", while the only thing not in the air is their toes and head

Things have gotten a little better since I took the headphones advice...I still see stupid people, but only hear Rob Zombie

 

[pumpchaser]

This is great, but unfortunately the asses that regularly pull this sh-- aren't reading it.I feel better though saying it though, instead of throwing the bastard through the window..

 

[Flash]

ok here gos:

-dnt bother chatting up my girlfriend when shes on the cardio machines, yes i know she has a nice figure i get to play with it every nite!

-dnt bother attemtping to lift weights that are clearly to heavy for you then slam them down saying "fucking hell thats heavy" of course its heavy ther weights - prick!

-dnt leave your plates lyin round all over the floor so ppl, like me, trip over them

-learn to adjust the position on the machines when trying to use them, it helps trust me!

-doin 40 reps per set does not impress me nor does it impress anyone else nor is it gonna make u into a big strong boy. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

i better stop now i can feel my blood pressure rising

 

[Evil ANT]

Super-hot blonde chicks with perfect bodies and huge boobs should not be allowed to wear tight clothes in the gym.

Seriously, back when I use to go to the gym (before I set up my home gym), there was this mega-fine hot chick that would show up from time to time. Every guy there was distracted and couldn't help but spend over half their workout checking her out.

So, in summation, super-hot chicks should have to wear baggy clothes in the gym.

 

[pumpchaser]

Kids in the gym: throw a fit, rage like a psycho for a while, this might impress upon them to STFU.

Girls in skimpy clothes: you have to love it when they feign shock at being bothered by men, while parading around semi-nude..?

 

[pumpchaser]

Here's a classic:
I'm entering the home stretch, the last 3-4 reps of a good, gruelling set, it's prime time and i'm goin for the gold. As if on cue, dolt invariably wanders up with perfect timing, with no clue whatsoever as to where i'm at, casually interjecting with "do you need those dumbells over there?". Might even ask a second time, with a tinge of indignation, when I don't answer. NICE. Nice way to interfere with something beyond your comprehension a-----, next time I might sling those bells at your wooden head after i'm done..

 

[cops25]

Here's a classic:
I'm entering the home stretch, the last 3-4 reps of a good, gruelling set, it's burning, getting tough but i'm in the zone. As if on cue, a dumbass invariably wanders up, no clue as to where i'm at, casually interjects with "do you need those dumbells over there?". Nice way to interfere with something beyond your comprehension a-----, next time i might throw those bells at your wooden head..

That, or "Duh, can I use them when your done?"

When I'm done with 'em, I could care less whether you curl em or shove em up your ass! Just dont bother me!!
That's the only one headphones dont cure...I was on the preacher bench, and this wingnut comes up and stands next to me...I dont know if he was talking or not (Had Zombie goin), so then he moves RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. I take the phones off, and ask "WHAT! WHAT CAN BE SO IMPORTANT?"
him: "Uh, can I get that when your through?"

 

[Belfort11]

Yup!!

I no longer even say hi to anyone.

The minute I walk in the Gym door, the headphones go on and I go to my happy place.

All the idiots in the Gym can't take me out of my happy place even though they try.

It's hard to hear someone when you have Metallica blasting your ear drums out.

I guess people see me and say there is that anti social ahole, and you know what, I don't care...........because I'm getting bigger and more ripped and they are not.

And, I chose to torture my legs on leg day so don't f*ck*ng ask me why am I working my legs and not my arms. That's why they look so damn big and look in sync with the rest of my body!! Not like two chicken legs carring a Ronnie Coleman torso!!
Funny concept, work them and they will grow!

thats exactly what i do, i put on my headphones have my metal blasting and maybe node if i know someone but i dont talk. and thats the reason i dont go with ppl anymore to the gym cuz i find i talk to much and get distracted so its easier by yourself, its hard to tell ppl this though, like when friends want to go with u to the gym and you say no i like going alone i get more done, sometimes they take it the wrong way

 

[Belfort11]

This stuff is cracking me up.



4) TSSSSS. I know some people can't help it, but I hate that noise people make when repping. TSSSS. TSSSS. TSSSSS. Cmon.

haha I TSSS a lot when im in my last sets of squating a huge amount of weight, i think its because of my boxing background and the breathing through the mouth haha. sorry if this annoys you

 

[Belfort11]

I was doing bicep curls and I was going heavy on my last sets so the last 2 reps i struggled and lost a bit of forum, then i put them down and start to rest and in the mirror behind me i see some skinny ass fucker mimiking me to his gf and telling her how im doing it wrong and shit i almost went over their and threw him off the side into the lobby.

Also i was doing dumbell press so i went to bring back the weights and get heavier ones, i had my water bottle and towel on the bench i come back and some old guy is sitting thier doing wrist curls so i put the weights down and sort of look around and try not to look to annoyed then he looks up and I smile to be polite and hes like ill be one more minute, what pissed me off the most was that thier were shoulder press benches beside me where he could of sat and done his wrist curls,

I saw this guy the other day, all he worked was chest and biceps they were pretty big but it looked so terrible, i dont know why not just work out everything, i mean he didnt even do shoulders or back or triceps, just biceps and chest.

 

[BoneCrusher]

I am in this area doing my sets. This area is mine. I paid for this time and place with my money and my pain. Stay out untill I am done. Do not think that because you are here that all you see is yours to use as you see fit when you see fit. I have respected your space and your time. Respect mine. I also train in MMA (mixed martial arts). I like to fight. It is a national sport. If you do not leave me alone than you will get MMA training free of charge.

 

[Belfort11]

ok this women today had 5 fucking sets of dumbells out and used 2 benches at the same time, not only was it an inconvenience that a lot of weights were missing, but It was an obstacle coarse just to get by all those weights.

 

[dalila]

ok this women today had 5 fucking sets of dumbells out and used 2 benches at the same time, not only was it an inconvenience that a lot of weights were missing, but It was an obstacle coarse just to get by all those weights.

belfort, what was she doing with 2 benches??

I used to go to this coed gym, well I tried 2 different ones actaully, and they were so busy I'd always had to put my name down for cardio machines.. so I am impatiently waiting there, wasting my time, and these 3 annoying girls would come dressed in expensive, branded, tiny workout gears with FULL MAKEUP on, run at snail speed, checking out the guys lifting all the while. Then after 10 min when they ( despite running at the snail speed) break into a slight sweat they'd put the machine on pause, go to the ladies, POWDER their nose ( kid you not!), and continue....

Once I lost it, went to the guy one of these females was chekcing out dragged him to her and said, she likes you, go talk to her, I wanna run!! LOL

Needless to say I quit those gyms, and now I train in ladies-only gym... it has it's draw backs but at least I am rid of posers!

 

[Luke9583]

Dont fill up a 1 gallon jug of water in the drinking fountain if there is a line behind you to get a quick sip.

 

[Jeff98]

The spandex one is funny. Nothing like accidentally catching a glimpse of a 250 lb. chick with 50% bodyfat wearing tight spandex bending over to get a weight.

That could ruin your whole day

 

[Belfort11]

She had a shoulder press bench and then a flat bench, I couldnt understand it, and no one was getting mad either, I guess it was cuz it was a little kind of oldish lady and I didnt want to be the one to spaz haha.

Its funny does anyone else find this, I go to the gym almost every day but at different hours like sometimes morning, afternoons and nights, im not consistent at all and theirs always those 1-2 people that are their at the same time, its weird because you go at different hours but bam 10 minutes after you arrive they arrive haha.

 

[BoneCrusher]

I was doing squats for about 15 min's. The guy doing bench got there after I did. After 5 min's tops this dude pulled some kind of sub sandwich and a soda out of his bag and sat down and chowed down. Left his crumps and trash all over the floor, wraper on the banch, then went to the racquete-ball courts.

 

[Luke9583]

^ that' is just disgusting.

 

[SRC]

OK, I have to get my two cents in here:

First a rant:
I live in a tiny ass town way up in the mountains and there's only one gym here. It's never that full but theres' this fat old hoss of a woman that comes in every morning, talks to the chick at the front desk, drinks a couple sodas, and then goes over to the leg press and proceeds to put 8 fucking plates on each side w/no warm up. Note: that she is wearing spandex shorts, has vericose (sp?) veins, fat cheese, and her legs are white enough to blind people. And she does like five or six reps and her knees barely bend. I mean this hog doesn't even take the weights down two inches before pressing them back up. Then she'll get up off her fat ass and tell her friend that she has such strong legs that she can't workout with anyone cause she uses so many plates. YEAH, YOU FAT COW, YOU COLDN'T DO A FULL RANGE OF MOTION WITH A 2.5 Lb PLATE ON EACH SIDE BUT EACH OF YOUR THIGHS COULD FEED A VILLAGE FULL OF STARVING CHILDREN FOR A YEAR - GO EAT FIVE OR SIX DOUBLE QUARTER POUNDERS WITH A DIET COKE AND STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THE GYM.

Thanks for letting me rant.

Now, the rules:
1) If you keep your sweaty ass gym clothes in your duffell bag and never take them out to wash them, and you wear them everyday, they're going to smell like Ron Jeremy's ass crack. Wash your shit man, I can smell the mold on your sweats from accross the room.

2) If you are not built as well as I am, don't even think about comming up to me and giving me lifting advice or ways to improve my form.

3) When you see a real lifter doing 225 on bench for 4 sets of 12-15 reps and NOT maxing out for one bullshit rep, don't giggle to your little flat chested freinds that you could "easily outbench that dude becuase he never goes above 225". Yeah you can do one set at 315 on the decline press with your spotter lifting the weight off your chest and bouncing it so hard you bruise yourself - go eat shit!

4) Don't ever, ever ever ever ever, wear Magnum PI lenght shorts in the gym. Cause if I happen to drop my head down after an intense set and look the wrong direction and see your left nut hanging out while sitting on the hammer press, I'm gonna puke.

5) Don't fart and then leave the area you were lifitng in so that I walk right into it. Especially when some hot chick is right behind me and thinks that I did it. Take your fart and your ass outside and do it.

6) Don't hock fucking luggies in the water fountain. There is a very small drain on most water fountains, and some yellow, chunky ass gob of spit isn't going to wash down no matter how many times the water hits it.

7) Don't bring your fat ass girlfriend to the gym if all she's gonna do is sit on the machine closest to the one you're using and talk to you about her yeast infection.

8) Just becuase you can bench 500 Lbs., weight 275 in the offseason, and have 23" calves, doesn't mean you're a baddass. I know guys that weith 125 that could beat the living Christ out of most anybody.

9) What you're listening to on your headphones is not what I'm listening to. So, I don't want to hear your immatation of Jay Z while I'm liftting.

10) When I'm in the locker room and am tying my shoes, I don't want your dick or your ass in my face while you walk by to take a shower, wear a fucking towell.

11) If you plan on spotting someone make sure your breath doesn't smell like three week old hallibut, especially when you're yelling "Come on homie, one more rep!" in my face.

12) If your strong enough to lift the weight, you're strong enough to re-rack the shit.

Wheh! I just want to tip my hat to whoever started this thread, cause I needed to let that all out man.

 

[Organichu]

I am in this area doing my sets. This area is mine. I paid for this time and place with my money and my pain. Stay out untill I am done. Do not think that because you are here that all you see is yours to use as you see fit when you see fit. I have respected your space and your time. Respect mine. I also train in MMA (mixed martial arts). I like to fight. It is a national sport. If you do not leave me alone than you will get MMA training free of charge.

Haha.

I'm really just starting out with weightlifting, so I'm a relative newbie, and I don't mind advice at all if it's given cordially.

I was doing some barbell bicep curls at a pretty high weight, with two sets of eight reps. I was on the seventh or eighth rep of the second set when this guy came over and taps me on the shoulder. I put down the weight and asked him what he wanted- he told me "son, you ain't gonna' get shit throwing up so few reps, you wanna be big, lift so many times you can't count how many reps you did".

I momentarily pause, my eye twitches (I believe that my hand involuntarily drifts to my waistband before I remember that I'm not gangster enough to carry a shank) and I tell him that I'll take his advice into account, but I'm right in the middle of a set at the moment. I even thank him for his advice.

He walks away and says loudly, for the entire gym to hear, "these dumbshit kids don't no a thing these days".

If I weren't an atheist I'd consider that God hates me.

 

[ihateschoolmt]

i got two stories the frist one was the gym was packed with all the weedend people and there were these two guys sitting only the only benches left talking for 45 minutes and if u asked them if you could use it they were like im not done... and then they both left without using it again...wtf.

and please watch were your going ive had three people almost make me drop a barbell when i was benching and they were just like oops. at least say sorry you fucking fuck!

 

[pmech]

at least say sorry you fucking fuck!

 

[Belfort11]

this is the best thread ever, let out your anger people

 

[Belfort11]

this one kid at the gym at my school all he would do when chicks were around is lift up his shirt and look in the mirror for about 20 minutes at his abs and try to impress everyone, what a wanker

 

[BoneCrusher]

Haha.

I'm really just starting out with weightlifting, so I'm a relative newbie, and I don't mind advice at all if it's given cordially.

I was doing some barbell bicep curls at a pretty high weight, with two sets of eight reps. I was on the seventh or eighth rep of the second set when this guy came over and taps me on the shoulder. I put down the weight and asked him what he wanted- he told me "son, you ain't gonna' get shit throwing up so few reps, you wanna be big, lift so many times you can't count how many reps you did".

I momentarily pause, my eye twitches (I believe that my hand involuntarily drifts to my waistband before I remember that I'm not gangster enough to carry a shank) and I tell him that I'll take his advice into account, but I'm right in the middle of a set at the moment. I even thank him for his advice.

He walks away and says loudly, for the entire gym to hear, "these dumbshit kids don't no a thing these days".

If I weren't an atheist I'd consider that God hates me.

I hate people that disrespect others in public for their own personal gain. When I was a 11 or 12-year-old kid I was picked on. After I spazed on a kid and pushed him into a closet then slammed the door on his head a few times the other kids let me be.

I was big by my late teens and have had no problems since but I still have a very low tolerance for bully types and usually mind-fuck them into either submitting or trying to whoop my ass. I like to fight so that???s OK.

That guy had no right to disrespect you as a human being. There is just no reason for that kinda thing. If he were very much bigger than you are it would have been tough to watch and remain silent.